Chapter 9 #2
I see Rodriguez register it—the size of me, the tusks, the barely contained violence humming under my skin. For half a second, fear flickers across her face.
Then it hardens. Certainty.
"That." She points at me. "Right there. That is exactly why you can't be anywhere near this trial."
I freeze.
"The growling. The posturing. The intimidation.
" She doesn't back down. "You just demonstrated precisely what Venetti's lawyers will use against us.
This is what the public sees when they look at you.
This is what the media will report. And Venetti's people?
" She shakes her head. "They'll have him out on appeal before the ink on the verdict is dry. "
The beast howls. I force it down.
"I wasn't—"
"You were. And you didn't even realize it." She's not angry anymore. Just matter-of-fact. "That's the problem. You can't help what you are. And what you are is a liability—not just to Eden, but to every person Venetti will kill if he walks free."
Every person Venetti will kill. Because of me. Because I couldn't keep the monster leashed for thirty seconds.
I tried to fight for her. And my fighting is exactly what proved Rodriguez right.
"I've been prosecuting cases for fifteen years," Rodriguez continues. "I know how juries think. I know how defense attorneys operate. If Venetti's lawyers get a whiff of this—" She gestures between me and Eden. "—they will use it to destroy her credibility. And that destroys our case."
I watch the color drain from Eden's face.
"Then they stay out of sight." Maya steps forward. "Don't come to the courthouse. Stay at a hotel. They can be in Atlanta without being visible."
"No. These lawyers have investigators. Contacts. If Eden is seen with an orc—any orc, anywhere in Atlanta—before, during, or after this trial, it becomes ammunition."
"For how long?" Eden's voice is barely a whisper.
"Until the appeals window closes. Months, at minimum."
"You can't be serious—"
"Let me be clear about something." Rodriguez steps toward Eden.
"This isn't just about you. Anthony Venetti has killed at least four people that we can prove.
We suspect a dozen more. He has connections to trafficking, extortion, and three other ongoing investigations.
If he walks because a jury decides our star witness has questionable judgment—" Her eyes cut to me.
"—he goes right back to what he was doing.
More bodies. More victims. More families destroyed. "
Nobody moves.
"So yes. I am asking you to pretend the last eight days didn't happen.
I'm asking you to walk into that courtroom and be the credible, unimpeachable witness we need.
I'm asking you to trust the system instead of your attack dog.
" She looks at me. "Because this is bigger than your feelings.
It's bigger than his. Venetti behind bars saves lives. That has to matter more."
Red's face flashes through my mind. The smell of smoke. The sound I made when I saw what was left of him.
My nature betrayed me then, too. Loving him made him a target. And now—
You're dangerous to her. You've always been dangerous to her.
And now it's not just Eden. If I fuck this up, Venetti walks. More people die. Because of me.
"This is insane." Eden's voice shakes. "You're telling me I have to pretend the last eight days didn't happen? Pretend he doesn't exist?"
Rodriguez stops. Her eyes move from Eden to me. Back to Eden.
"Christ." The word lands flat, hard. "You've got to be kidding me. You two are a thing, aren't you?"
Color floods Eden's cheeks. She doesn't deny it.
Rodriguez rounds on Carver. "You let this happen? You sent her to hide with an orc biker gang and didn't think to check in? Didn't think maybe someone should be monitoring the situation?"
Carver's jaw tightens. "My priority was keeping her alive. Not policing her personal life."
"Well, your lack of oversight just made my job ten times harder.
" Rodriguez pinches the bridge of her nose.
Takes a breath. When she looks at Eden again, her voice is colder than before.
"This changes everything. He can't be anywhere near this trial.
Not in the gallery. Not in Atlanta. Not even in the same state if we can help it. "
"That's not—" Eden starts.
"I'm telling you that your association with him is a problem.
Everything you've survived—the safe house, the running, the hiding—can be undone if the defense argues your testimony was influenced by outside parties.
And now?" She gestures between us. "Now they don't have to discredit your testimony.
They just have to tell the jury you were fucking an orc. Prejudice does the rest."
Eden turns to me. Eyes bright. Desperate.
"Diesel. Say something."
I already tried. And Rodriguez threw it back in my face.
"Eden." My voice doesn't sound like mine. "She's not wrong."
"What?"
"Being connected to me puts a target on you. It always has."
"I don't care about targets—"
"You should care." Rodriguez cuts in. "You're about to do the hardest thing you've ever done. You need to walk into that courtroom without anything holding you back."
"He's not holding me back—"
"He's a risk." Rodriguez doesn't flinch. "Being with him makes you as good as dead."
Eden turns away from Rodriguez. Turns to me. The room falls away—Maya, Ash, Carver, the DA with her sharp suit and sharper words. It's just us now. Just her eyes on mine.
"So you're just going to—" Her voice breaks. "Let them win? Let them decide whether we—"
"There is no we."
The words come out harder than I mean. I watch them hit. Watch her flinch.
I want to take them back. I don't.
"Not out there. What we had here—in this cottage—it was real. But it can't survive outside these walls." I force myself to hold her gaze. "You were an assignment, Eden. I was supposed to keep you alive until the trial. That's it. That's all this was ever supposed to be."
The blood drains from her face.
Good. Let her hate me. Hate is easier to survive than what comes next.
"You don't mean that."
"I mean every word." The lie scrapes my throat raw. "You needed to feel safe. I gave you that. But what you're feeling? That's just gratitude. It's not love."
Every word is a knife. Cutting me as deep as it cuts her. But I keep my face still. Keep my voice steady. She can't know what this is costing me or she'll fight harder.
"That's not—" She stops. Pulls herself straighter. When she speaks again, her voice has gone cold. "So that's it. The DA says jump and you say how high. You're not even going to fight."
"Fight for what? The right to get you killed?"
"Fight for us!"
"You promised me." The word comes out broken. "Last night. In the dark. You said you'd be there—every step. You said Crow and you would be right behind us. You promised."
The words hit like bullets. I remember saying it. Remember the way she relaxed against me when I did. The way she finally let herself believe she wasn't going to be alone.
And now I'm breaking that promise while she watches.
Us. The word guts me. There was an us. For eight days, there was an us. And I'm the one putting it in the ground.
I could keep fighting. Could dig in, make Rodriguez back down, force my way into that courthouse.
And then what? Every camera in Atlanta captures the orc who's been "guarding" the witness. Defense attorneys have a field day. The jury sees exactly what Rodriguez predicted—a monster standing behind their star witness. Venetti's people spin it into coercion, intimidation, reasonable doubt.
He walks. More people die. And Eden spends the rest of her life running, knowing my pride cost her everything.
I can't do that to her. Even if she hates me for it.
"This ends here." Quieter now. Worse. "There's you, about to be brave. And there's me, making sure nothing gets in your way. That's all this ever was."
"You're lying."
"I'm protecting you."
"Bullshit." She steps toward me. Gets in my face. "This isn't protection. This is fear. You're using her—" She points at Rodriguez. "—as an excuse to run."
She's shaking now. Hurt and fury warring in every line of her body.
"You told me some things have to break before they can be fixed. So which is it, Diesel? Are you breaking me to fix me—or breaking us to fix yourself?"
I don't answer. Can't. Because she's right. She's so fucking right and I can't let her know it.
"If you're going to end this, at least tell me the real reason."
The real reason.
Because I let someone love me once and got him killed. I'll die before I do the same to you.
"You want the real reason? Fine." My voice comes out destroyed. "I'm not doing this because Rodriguez told me to. I'm doing it because she's right. Being with me is dangerous. Always has been. I've spent fifteen years making sure no one gets close enough to find out how dangerous."
"Diesel—"
"The last person who loved me burned to death for it." The words rip out. "They set fire to his house because he took in an orc. Because he cared about the wrong thing. And I had to identify what was left."
Something shifts in her face. Not shock—she already knows this story. I told her in the bathtub, in the dark, when I thought we had time.
Recognition. And then fury.
"So yeah. I'm scared. Fucking terrified. Not of the trial. Of what happens when the world finds out you chose me. How they'll make you pay for it." I force the breath out. "You're the strongest woman I've ever met. But you can't survive me. No one can."
"So this isn't about the DA," Eden says slowly. "This is about you."
"It's about what's best for you."
She laughs. The sound is sharp enough to cut.
"No. That's just the lie you're telling yourself so you don't get hurt again."
I have no defense. She knows it. I can see the moment she realizes I'm not going to deny it.
I stay silent.
"If you felt this way, why did you sleep with me?"
"Because I'm selfish."