Chapter 7
Lyrix
“Hey, baby. Would you like me to make you a sandwich?” my mama asked Grai when she came in from the front porch. She’d been out there since she woke up, sitting in one of the rocking chairs, going back and forth while staring at the sky.
She shook her head, avoiding eye contact. “No, ma’am. I’m not hungry.” Without waiting around for a response, she headed upstairs. My eyes looked after her, even after she’d disappeared. Something was definitely up with her. She was not normally this antisocial with us.
“She okay?” my mama asked. “I heard her on the phone early this morning, and it sounded pretty heated.”
I pulled my chin hair with my arms folded over my chest. “I’m not sure, but I’m about to go find out.” I nodded to the ingredients on the counter. “Could you make her a sandwich? I’m going to make her eat.”
She laughed with a shake of her head. “You swear you somebody’s daddy,” she teased before doing exactly as I’d asked.
While she made the sandwich, I went to the fridge to get Grai a ginger ale. My mama handed me the plate with a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos, and I tucked the soda under my arm before heading upstairs. I knocked on Grai’s bedroom door and patiently waited for her to respond.
“Yes,” she called out softly.
“It’s me.”
There was a tiny pause before she replied.
“Come in, Pop.” I smiled, twisting the knob to let myself in.
I found her sitting on the floor in front of the Juliette balcony.
She always loved this view when it was just a guest room, and she would be visiting.
I wasn’t shocked when she chose it as her room when they moved in.
I set down the plate of food, then walked over to where she was. I leaned against the wall, looking at the view of Mount Jasper in the distance. The sun was high in the sky but hidden by heavy, menacing-looking clouds. Almost on cue, I noticed a drop of rain on the railing.
“What’s wrong, Bubbles?”
She shook her head and mumbled, “Nothing.” I watched her pick at the carpet with her chin on her chest.
Sighing heavily, I took a seat on the floor beside her.
“Talk to me.” I spoke slowly and lowered my voice an octave.
Lifting her hand from fidgeting with the carpet, I held it in mine and gave it a reassuring squeeze.
“I know it’s something bothering you, so you better tell me before I tickle it out of you. ”
She gave me an evil side eye. “You better not.” I scrunched my fingers like I was about to do it, and she giggled. “Oh my goodness. Leave me alone, Lyrix.”
I bumped her shoulder. “I can’t until I know you’re good.”
Her smile faltered. I watched her eyes water and had to fight the urge to burn the world down. She exhaled sadly and then said, “It’s just something my mama said on the phone.”
I inwardly scowled, already knowing how her mother could be. “What did she say, Bubbles?”
When she turned to look at me, the tears she was trying so desperately to keep in began to roll down her cheeks. I could feel her sorrow when she stared into my eyes. As always, I instantly wanted to make it better.
“She said it was unfair and selfish to put my burdens on you,” she whispered. The crack in her voice ripped through my body like a poison. I snatched her into my side, allowing her the space to really process her mother’s hurtful words. Why would she even say some shit like that to her own child?
When she began to calm down, I palmed her face and stared into her troubled eyes.
“With all due respect, fuck Ms. Tracy,” I spat.
She gave me a little smile before I continued.
“You and my boys are not burdens because that would mean you’re a heavy load.
Y’all are weightless, like grace. Don’t let what she thinks you deserve be the truth.
I offered my home because I wanted to. Not because I feel sorry for you or nothing like that.
I did this because I’d rather be on the streets than y’all. ”
I lay my forehead against hers. For a beat of silence, all that could be heard was our shallow breaths and the light patter of rain.
“People have never understood the depth of our friendship, and we don’t need them to, because shit has always been different with us.
Have you felt unwanted since you’ve been here?
” She sniffled, then shook her head slowly.
“Exactly. You are wanted. My boys are wanted. Shit, I might even need y’all here with me.
The boys are the happiest I’ve seen them in a while, and so are you. Y’all deserve that. You understand me?”
She nodded, but I shook my head. “Nah, I need you to speak up, Bubbles. This some serious shit, and I don’t want you doubting a muthafuckin’ thing on account of your mama and her missing side tooth. That’s the only burden she needs to be worried about.”
This time, she actually laughed. She swatted my shoulder while rocking back and forth, cackling. “Don’t be talking about my mama, Lyrix.”
“Well, she better stop talking to you crazy. I don’t play about you, Grai. You know that.”
She smiled softly, sighed, and allowed herself to get lost in my eyes. “I do.”
We sat there, staring at each other goofily, before I remembered the sandwich my mother had made for her.
“Let that shit go, and come eat this sub my mama made for you.” I helped her off the floor and could tell she’d left the dead weight from that phone call on the floor.
I was happy because that sadness and doubt were beneath her.
Her place in my life was secure. It was the last thing Ms. Tracy should’ve been speaking on, and I was going to let her know that the next time I saw her too.