Chapter 25
LILY
Ineed to kill something. Like right now. I haven’t been able to get a wink of sleep, which is just adding to my mood. I checked my job app on the off chance Barrett had sent me another one, but it was empty.
I even considered going over to Asher’s mum’s place and slaughtering Monty, the good for nothing asshat that’s keeping Asher from going home.
Because maybe he needs to go home. Maybe he needs to just not be here anymore.
The thought sends an ache right to the centre of my chest, and shit, it’s a feeling I don’t want to analyse.
I can’t let Asher get to me. It’s too risky, and I know damn well if he found out even the barest minimum of what I do on my side hustle, that he’d bolt.
Unless you’re born into this life, it would be almost impossible to accept.
Thank Christ it’s Easter Sunday. It gives me something to focus on, so I leave the confines of my bedroom early to set up the Easter hunt for the boys. It doesn’t matter how old they are, I still set up an egg hunt for them, and they love it.
By the time the twins and Asher rise around mid-morning, I’m about ready to jump out of my skin with the need for a distraction.
“Yes!” Ronan whoops, his eyes bright with excitement as they land on the note on top of the counter.
“You really don’t have to do this, Mum. We are too old for Easter hunts.” Jude smiles, his eyes warm as he shifts his attention between me and his brother.
“Speak for yourself.” Asher grins at Jude, slapping him on the shoulder as he passes. “I’m still a kid, all immature and unable to be serious.”
The dig goes over the twins’ heads, but I get Asher’s message, loud and clear.
“Me too.” Ronan grins as he opens the note.
I’ve done this every year since they were eight, when they found out the Easter Bunny wasn’t real. I have a bunch of clues spread throughout the house, and the boys have to figure out each riddle to claim their prize and the next note.
I smile and watch the boys as they laugh and stir each other up until they find each clue and the small gifts along the way.
Just like every year, Asher is included in the hunt, but unlike other years, his smile is forced as he tries to hide his mood.
At the end of the hunt, they find a box of chocolate eggs, some gift cards, and a bottle of cologne each. I usually get them all the same, but I couldn’t stand the thought of Asher smelling like my sons, so to avoid it looking obvious, I got three different colognes this year.
Jude walks by with his gifts, a huge smile pulling at his lips as he gives me a peck on my cheek.
“Thanks, Mum.”
Smiling as he walks towards the dining table, I watch Ronan shoot me a wink. “Thanks, Mummio.”
I roll my eyes, but he doesn’t notice, too busy trying to peel the foil off a chocolate egg.
“Thanks,” Asher mutters as he strides by, not looking at me as he heads to the stairs and disappears up them.
Jesus. I’m too old for all this drama.
Part of me feels like screaming, but I can’t do that. Not in front of the twins, so I push my pain aside and focus on cooking a nice Easter lunch.
By the time I’m placing the shepherd’s pie on the table, the twins are hovering like starved lions.
“Where’s Asher?” I ask them, straightening the cutlery the twins laid out haphazardly.
“Brooding upstairs. I think he misses his mum,” Ronan offers, and I nod, like that’s probably what’s causing his behaviour today.
The doorbell rings, and I freeze, glancing up at the twins, who are frowning.
“Who would that be?” Jude grumbles, and I shrug, heading towards the front entrance.
“Tell Asher lunch is ready.” I ignore the twins flicking each other with the cloth napkins I laid out, and duck into my bedroom, reaching under the dresser to grab the gun I have taped there.
I quickly check it’s loaded, and then slip into the passage to open the front door with the gun just out of sight behind my leg.
“Took you long enough,” Alexander snaps, shooting me a glare before pushing past me, and I have to fight every instinct in me to not point the barrel at his head and pull the trigger.
“What are you doing here?” I snap, closing the front door before slipping my gun into the drawer in the hall table.
Alex ignores me, stepping into the main living area to greet the boys, including Asher, who is tugging a t-shirt over his head, covering up the sculpted ridges of his abs.
How sad.
“Happy Easter, boys!”
The twins stop fooling about, stunned at their dad’s voice, who looks just as pompous as every other time I see him with the tailored pants, white shirt and blue knitted vest.
Gag.
“Uh… What are you doing here?” Ronnie asks, not so politely, but it doesn’t sway the grin on Alexander’s face.
“Can’t a dad pop in to see his sons for Easter?”
“Maybe you could have called and met us somewhere else so Mum wouldn’t have to endure you,” Jude hisses this time, and I don’t miss the way Asher is biting the inside of his cheek as he tries not to smile.
“Well, she’ll have to endure me, I’m afraid. I came to see what you thought about the news?”
The twins frown and look at each other in confusion.
“News?” they ask in unison as they turn back to their dad, and Alexander has the nerve to look shocked as he turns to me.
“You haven’t told them yet, Lilian?”
“Don’t you dare!” I hiss, taking a step towards him with a pointed finger raised. “Don’t you dare pretend like this is my job to do. It has nothing to do with me.”
“What are you talking about, Mum?” Jude asks and I flinch, realising how bad this is going to look. Me knowing their dad’s secret after all this time and never telling them.
I fucking hate Alex for this!
“Come on, Lily. You said you would tell the boys, and it’s been a long enough wait. They need to know.”
I storm up to Alex and snarl in his face. “You coward. You were the one that didn’t want to tell them. Don’t put this on me.”
“Tell us what!” Jude yells, gaining our attention, and I look at the twins and Asher as they all wear the same confused expression.
Shit.
“Maybe Asher could go somewhere else while we talk as a family,” Alexander sneers. “Perhaps to his own home.”
“Actually, this is his home. He’s not going anywhere,” I snap, pushing past Alexander and gesturing to the table. “Boys. Sit. Eat your lunch before it gets cold.”
Asher’s face morphs from distaste to surprise at my comment, and he follows the twins, taking a seat at the table.
When Alex goes to sit at the head of the table where my lunch is sitting, I shove him out of the way and take the seat.
“You’re no longer the head of this household. Sit down at the other end while we eat,” I snap, any hint of maturity vanishing at the mere presence of this arsehole.
“What? No food for me?” he whines, and I shake my head.
“Nope. I only cook for invited guests.”
He grumbles like a poor mummy’s boy as he takes a seat at the end of the table, eyeing our lunch, which has now lost its appeal to me.
Still, I start eating, not willing to let it go to waste because of this wanker, and eye the sharp knife on the table next to me.
It would look great protruding from his eye.
“So, go ahead, Lily,” Alex speaks again. “Tell the boys the news.”
I still, the fork nearly to my mouth as I shoot Alex a glare down the table.
“Well, since you’re here, and it’s your fucking story to tell, you may as well tell them.”
“Honestly, Lily. Your mouth has turned into street trash since you haven’t had a man around to keep you in line.”
Asher’s fist slams down on the table, rattling the plates, and all eyes turn to him.
“Since you are a visitor in Lily’s house, you’d better speak to her with the respect she deserves, or I’ll happily show you the fucking door.”
For a long moment, the entire house is silent, like the world forgot to breathe, and then, my son speaks, bringing it to life again.
“Huh.” Ronan smirks around a mouthful of food, pointing his fork towards Asher. “What he said.”
My heart is racing with fear that Asher’s outburst will somehow out what we’ve been doing together, but as I glance from Ronnie to Jude, who is nodding in agreement, I figure they must just see their mate standing up for their mum, and not their mum’s lover.
Alex huffs, returning his glare to me. “You’re the one who is meant to be telling them.”
Jesus… this again.
“Actually, you should be. She’s your daughter, and if she’s dying, you should be the one to tell them,” I state before shovelling more pie into my mouth.
“What?” Alexander’s brows shoot high. “Dying? What on earth are you talking about?”
“Hang on.” Jude raises his hand, his brows furrowing. “Dad has a daughter?”
“Wait…” Ronan holds his fork up. “If Dad has a daughter, doesn’t that mean we have a sister?”
Asher’s eyes go wide as they lock onto mine, and my cheeks heat as my guilt over keeping this secret nearly makes me flee from the table.
“Are you fucking serious? We have a sister?” Jude snaps, his glare pointed towards his dad.
“Wait… what? How? I’m confused.” Ronnie drops his fork with a clatter to the table, and I can’t help but glance at Asher, whose brows shoot up in question at me.
I try to ignore the boys and focus on what Alexander said to me.
“Alex, what do you mean? Tamara told me Melanie was sick. Dying. That’s why there was an urgency for the boys to learn about her.”
Alexander’s face turns red in anger. “She’s not sick. Melanie is a perfectly healthy and happy eight-year-old.”
“We have a sister, and she’s eight?” Jude asks, still trying to get a straight answer from his dad.
“Yes, Jude. You have a sister. It’s why your mother left me. She found out that I’d had a child with Tamara.”
The twins swing their heads my way.
Shit. Shit. Shit.
“That’s why you left him?” Ronan asks, his voice cracking with emotion. “Because he had a kid with another woman?”
“I put up with the infidelity for our entire marriage, but the moment I realised he’d had a child with Tamara, I ended it,” I admit, and it’s Jude’s angry glare that practically has me shrinking back in my seat.
“So, for the last couple of years, you’ve kept this secret?” Jude asks, his face dropping with hurt. “Why?”
My heart sinks. I know I should’ve told them, but I honestly thought it was something that should come from their dad. As time passed, it got harder and harder.
“I’d hoped your dad would tell you,” I offer truthfully. “I’m sorry that I didn’t.”
Ronan stands from the table so abruptly that his chair flies back into the wall with a thud.
“I expect that piece of shit to keep secrets because he’s a fucking coward. But I never thought in a million years you’d keep something like this from us.”
“Ronnie… I—”
“No, Mum!” Jude snaps, shoving out of his seat, too. “This isn’t okay. Ronnie is right.”
As hot tears well in my eyes, I watch my two beautiful boys look at each other like they are having a silent conversation, before they turn and leave the room, their steps heavy as they pound up the stairs.
A whimper escapes me, and Alexander scoffs, but before he can say anything, Asher speaks.
“Get the fuck out.”
Alex curls his lip at Asher as he remains in his seat. “You’re the one who should get out, boy. You’re not part of this family.”
It happens before I can stop myself, the beast in me exploding to the surface in a wave of rage. The sharp knife that was sitting on the table next to me flies from my grip, whipping through the air before stabbing into Alexander’s bicep.
He cries out in pain, which seems to douse me like a bucket of iced water, and my eyes go wide at what I just did.
Oh, fuck.
My gaze darts to Asher, who is wide-eyed but fucking grinning as he looks from me to Alex and back again.
“You should work on your aim, so you don’t miss his heart next time,” Asher remarks, and I shake my head, trying not to laugh.
“I missed on purpose. I can’t be bothered dealing with the police today.” I stand from my chair, very aware that my words are dangerously revealing. They are too close to my real self, the version I keep hidden, and I’m worried Asher and Alex will recognise the Crimson Angel in me.
“Y-you stabbed me,” Alex cries, clutching his arm just below the knife, and I roll my eyes as I approach him.
“Stop being dramatic. It’s barely a scratch.” I reach up, grip the handle, and pull the knife free with ease.
The cowardly bitch cries out again like he’s fucking dying.
I wish he was.
“Get the fuck out of my house and never come back here again. You will never ever be welcome here.”
Alex leaps up from the chair, clutching his bloody wound. “You bitches are all crazy. Why the hell I ever got married to you or Tamara is beyond me. Conniving whores, the lot of you.”
“This way, Mr Bennett.” Asher gestures to the front of the house. “Let me show you the fucking door.”
Alexander glares at him but departs quickly before the pounding feet of the twins can be heard coming back down the stairs.
“He gone?” Ronan asks, glaring around the space.
“Yep,” Asher answers for me, his eyes darting my way in concern.
“Good. We’re heading back to campus.” Jude’s tone is laced with anger, and my eyes well with tears again as I take a step towards him. “No.” He holds his hands up, and I stop in my tracks.
“It’s still Easter,” I remind him. “I thought you weren’t going back until tomorrow night?”
“Plans have changed for obvious reasons,” Jude snaps, and my shoulders slump.
I’m losing my boys.
A sob escapes me, and I turn my back on them, feeling embarrassed to be falling apart in front of them.
“Mum,” Jude rasps from behind me, his hand reaching out to turn me back around, and I peer up into his dark eyes, seeing the pain in them.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper, and he nods.
“I know, Mum. I know you didn’t keep that secret to hurt us, but you still kept it. We are just gonna need some time.” He leans forward and presses a kiss to my forehead before turning and walking away.
Meanwhile, Ronan doesn’t even offer me that as he walks out, slamming the door behind him.