Chapter 77
DERRICK
I’m not okay.
I keep telling myself I am, but my legs haven’t stopped shaking since I woke up this morning, and my stomach has been doing backflips.
I’ve changed my outfit three times. Maybe four.
I’m losing track. Charlie leans in the doorway, watching me have a mild breakdown in real time, arms folded, hair still damp from the shower, looking disgustingly calm for someone whose boyfriend is spiraling.
“They already love you,” he reminds me gently.
“But what happens if they meet me and they decide they don’t like me anymore?”
Charlie gives me a look. “How can anyone not love you?”
“There are plenty of people who don’t love me,” I tell him, rolling my eyes.
Charlie steps close to me, cupping my face. “Well, I’m not one of them. I love you, D.” I gasp, sucking in the air.
“You do?” Still not quite believing someone like him could love someone like me.
“I do.” He smiles, leaning forward and kissing me slowly, deeply, showing me just how much he loves me with his tongue.
“I love you too.”
“You’re stronger than you think, D.”
“I know, but I don’t always want to be strong, and the fact that you are strong for me when I need it the most …
no one has ever made me feel more loved, protected, strong, happy, special, all the things.
It’s the first time in my life I have truly felt loved and secure with someone.
I thank whoever I need to thank every day for finding you, Charlie.
Because you’re a fucking catch and I feel like you’re going to wake up one day from this spell and realize you can do better,” I confess to him.
“Fuck. Never,” he tells me strongly. “You are the fucking prize, D. You.” A tear falls down my face. “We both need to stop being so hard on ourselves. We are perfect together. We each bring something to the other. Ying and Yang. We’re opposites, and I think that’s what works.”
Charlie’s right. We fit perfectly together. There was no going back he was my person and we both felt it the moment we met.
“I can’t wait to do life with you.”
“Me too,” he says, kissing me again, long and slow.
“Now, let’s get it together, you have brothers to meet.
And I would rather not meet them with my dick tenting my pants.
” I look down, smirk, and then evilly grab his cock through his pants and give it a squeeze.
“Derrick,” he growls, but I just smile because in this moment, I don’t think I’ve ever been happier.
Before Charlie can respond the buzzer goes.
I freeze.
Charlie freezes and mumbles a slew of curse words at me. “Perfect timing.” He adjusts himself like he’s trying not to kill me.
My whole body feels like it drops through the floor. “They’re here,” I whisper, voice barely existing.
Charlie squeezes my shoulders. “Deep breath. You’ve got this.”
I take one. It does nothing.
He hits the intercom.
A male voice comes through, Scottish, deep, familiar.
“Hi, it’s Rowan. We’re all here.”
All.
Oh God.
All four.
“They’re all here,” I croak.
Charlie grins, the asshole. “Let the chaos begin.”
He buzzes them in.
Charlie looks at me. “Ready?”
“No.”
“Too late.”
He opens the door, and my heart stops.
Rowan stands at the front, all tall, looking like he’s stepped off the runway in jeans and a white collared shirt with the sleeves rolled up, showing off an expensive-looking watch. Eldest serious energy radiating off him in waves, but I guess technically I’m the eldest now.
Callum is right beside him, dressed in dress pants, a tee with a linen shirt over the top, looking very sharp. He has sunglasses on top of his head, holding his hair back.
Behind them is Tavish, all broad-shouldered, hair a gorgeous dark mess. He’s dressed in tan pants and a white tee, which looks basic, but I can tell is all designer and costs a lot.
And Arran, all dimples, curls, cheeky smile, dressed in linen pants and a shirt, looking more like he’s stepped off a yacht in Mykonos.
Four men.
Four variations of Sinclair genetics.
All staring at me.
Rowan steps forward first, I guess as the oldest sibling. “Derrick.” My name in his accent almost kills me. We sort of just stare at one another, taking in the moment, but it was obviously too long for Callum.
Callum pushes Rowan aside. “Move. I want to hug my brother.”
“Cal,” Rowan calls out as he tries to grab him, but Callum dodges and barrels straight at me.
Suddenly, I’m in a rib-crushing hug. “Callum …” I gasp.
He lifts me anyway, like I weigh nothing. “Look at you! Fuck, you’re real!”
“Put him down,” Rowan snaps, pulling his brother off me.
“You got to FaceTime him first, I deserved the first hug.” Callum pouts, which makes me smile.
Rowan rolls his eyes. “You promised not to be weird.”
Callum shrugs. “This is how I am. He’s going to find out sooner or later. I’m excited. He’s our brother, let me express myself!”
Charlie is laughing behind us.
Tavish steps forward next, looking me up and down. “Fuck, Rowan, he really does look like you.”
Arran nods dramatically. “But hotter.”
Rowan’s mouth drops open. “Arran …”
“What?” Arran shrugs. “I’m being factual.”
And God help me, I laugh. Because I can’t stop it. It’s too much. Too surreal. Too weirdly perfect.
Rowan steps forward then, slower than the others. His expression softens into something warm, steady, almost vulnerable. “Derrick,” he says in that deep Scottish voice.
“May I …?”
We love a consent king. I swallow and nod. His hug is gentler, grounding. Not chaotic like Callum’s. Just … solid.
“I’m really glad to finally meet you,” he murmurs.
“Me too,” I whisper.
Tavish pushes him aside. “My turn.” He hugs me like I’m his long-lost best friend. “I can’t believe this is happening. We’ve wanted to know about you for so long.”
Arran hugs me last, warm and sweet. “You’re stuck with us now. Sorry in advance.”
Callum throws an arm around my shoulders. “Okay, now, we can start this sibling shit for real.”
“Oh, who are you?” Arran asks, clocking Charlie in the doorway, silently taking it all in.
Charlie clears his throat, smiling. “Hi. I’m Charlie.”
Callum eyes him up. “Damn, brother, you did good.”
I slap his arm. “Stop flirting with my boyfriend.”
“I see jealousy runs in the family.” Callum winks.
“This is awesome. We’ve never had a gay brother before,” Tavish says, looking genuinely thrilled.
Rowan groans. “For the love of …” He pinches the bridge of his nose.
“Was that offensive?” Tavish asks, looking very confused, which is sweet.
“I’ve never had straight brothers before,” I tease, which makes Tavish burst out laughing.
“I knew you would be cool.” Tavish grins.
Tavish then shakes Charlie’s hand, and we usher them into my home, which feels rather small with these four burly men and Charlie in it.
“Can I get anyone drinks? We have beer, wine, champagne, water, sodas?” Charlie asks.
“Think today deserves champagne, don’t you think?” Callum answers.
“Every day deserves champagne,” I tell him.
“You’re going to fit right in,” Callum tells me as we take our seats in the living room.
“Your home is beautiful,” Rowan says, taking a seat in the armchair.
“It’s the first home I’ve ever bought. It’s small, but I love it.”
“Such a great location too. You’re near the action,” Callum adds.
“My studio and shop are just up the road within walking distance, because LA traffic is horrendous. Dirty Texas Records is a couple of doors up, which is great for my business partner, Sienna. She’s married to Evan Wyld from Dirty Texas, and they can see each other,” I explain.
“Derrick is so much cooler than you guys. He hangs out with rockstars,” Tavish adds.
“They’re really normal guys. It’s more daddy daycare than rockstar life now.”
“Still cool,” Tavish states.
“You’re a stylist, Derrick?” Arran asks.
I nod. “I dress a lot of people, some famous, some not.”
Charlie comes in with the champagne and starts pouring drinks for everyone.
“Who do you think is the best-dressed today out of your brothers?” Callum asks.
“Oh no, you can’t ask me that,” I tell him.
“Come on, we need to know. You’re our brother now, you can’t let us walk out the door looking like shit, it would look bad for your brand.” Callum smirks.
“Ignore him,” Rowan states.
“Cal just wants free style advice. He is the one who needs it the most,” Arran shares.
“No, that’s Rowan. His wardrobe is full of the same items, and he just rotates them,” Tavish adds.
“I work in a fucking office, guys,” Rowan argues.
“So do I, but at least my suits are not dull,” Callum points out.
“I think you all have good style, and it suits your personalities,” I add, trying to break up the bickering.
“Boo. That’s diplomatic,” Callum teases.
“How about we cheers,” Rowan asks, holding up his glass of champagne, changing the subject. “Derrick, it is an honor to get to know you, and we hope we don’t scare you off after spending the weekend with us.”
We clink our glasses together and I take a sip.
“So, when are you coming to London next?” Callum asks.
“Not sure. It wasn’t on the cards,” I tell him.
“What are your plans for the holidays? Mum is dying to meet you,” Tavish adds.
“Really? I thought she would want nothing to do with me.”
The room falls silent.
“She knows you’re not your father,” Rowan tells me. “She really wants to get to know you.”
“Won’t I be triggering?”
Rowan shakes his head. “Our mum is one of the kindest people I know. She feels horrible that you were left alone in this world, she said if she had known, she would have come forward earlier.”
“I hate what my father might have done to your mother,” I tell them, twisting my champagne glass as my father’s sins cut me deeply.
“You can hate him, but she’s learned to forgive him because, like she’s always told us, she can’t regret the two of us. That as horrible as your father was, he gave her us.” Tears well in my eyes, and I try to hold them back but fail.
Callum gets up and sits beside me, throwing his arm over my shoulder. “We are sorry that you didn’t have the greatest parents.”
“Thanks.” I sniffle.
“As weird as this may be, our mum truly wants to get to know you. She has already called in the interior decorator and set aside a room for you.”
“We all have one,” Rowan adds.
Wow. That’s very nice.
“Be aware if you do come for the holidays, she will make you and Charlie wear matching tartan pajamas. We get new ones every year. She loves the holidays and goes all out on them,” Arran explains.
“This is all …” I sniffle.
“Overwhelming?” Rowan suggests. I nod. “Sorry, we don’t mean to overwhelm you.”
I shake my head. “No, it’s not bad, it’s just …” I wipe the tears from my cheeks. “I’ve been alone for so long. Sienna saved me, her entire family, as well as Vanessa’s saved me when I didn’t think I could go on. And now …” I look up and take in the faces of my brothers. “I’m not alone.”
The boys all come over and tackle me, giving me a hug, which has us all in fits of laughter.