10. Cade
After two hours of texting Sawyer and promising her all the desserts she could carry the next time we went to the store, she caved and told me Gwen would be at work tonight. I feel kind of stalkerish, but honestly, I haven’t been able to sleep lately, wondering how many of these nights she’s spent walking alone late at night while I was home warm and safe in bed.
It doesn’t sit right with me, so today, I’m here to make sure she knows I’m walking her home. I was in such a rush to get here I forgot to throw a hat on, which is, unfortunately, the easiest way to limit the number of times I am recognized and stopped for autographs. This time, though, I don’t mind at all. When a young girl and her mom stop me, their faces light up the moment they realize who I am.
Although the young girl, Kennedy, wastes no time telling me Miles is her favorite.
Apparently, I’m her dad’s favorite player, so they end up FaceTiming him, and the look on his face matches the surprise on his daughter’s. It takes me a moment of talking to these two to realize these are the girls Gwen was with the night I saw her. We spend a bit talking before Kennedy looks at me and says, “Why are you at the hospital this late at night, visiting hours are over.”
Her mom looks appalled at her honesty, but I just laugh.
“I’m here looking for my friend. She works here, helping people.”
“Oh, then I like your friend. Maybe she’ll be able to get me a new kidney.”
With her words, my stomach drops. The pit that’s always sitting deep in my stomach worsening as every memory of my sister lying in that hospital bed comes flooding back.
“I-I’m sure she would love to be able to help you. She’s one of the best people I know. I’m sorry you’re going through that, it’s a challenging fight, but you’re strong. Always remember that, and even when you’re not feeling that way, you’re surrounded by people who care about you.”
Looking around the cafeteria once more, I glance at the clock, hoping I didn’t get her lunch break wrong. But then I see her, and our eyes lock, my whole body relaxing.
“Did you find your friend?” she asks, her eyes following mine. “Oh hey, it’s Gwen. Do you think she has my milkshake? Maybe she’ll be able to get you and your friend one, too!”
Gwen must be her nurse, and that’s why I saw her with them that night. With a quick nod at Gwen, she starts to make her way over to us. Her body is confident, but I can see the uncertainty in her eyes, probably wondering what the fuck I’m doing here with her patient.
Tiny, little, invisible strings that all keep bringing me back to this woman.
“Hey ladies, Marsha started our milkshakes. She’ll have them out shortly,” Gwen says to Kennedy and her mom before turning to look at me with a less enthusiastic, more questioning smile. “Hey, Cade, what’re you doing here?” she asks, her professional tone in full force.
“Actually, I’m here to talk to you,” I say, not missing the way her eyes widen or the way Kennedy and her mom glance at each other with little smirks.
“Umm… okay,” she says, looking over at Kennedy before coming back to me.
Just then, a woman who I can only assume is Marsha, walks over with their milkshakes, a big smile on her face as she chats with Kennedy and Denise while Gwen just stares at me, tugging her bottom lip between her teeth. And all I can think about is taking that lip between my teeth and drowning out her screams with my kiss.
Fucking hell, why can’t I stop thinking about her like this?
“Would it be possible for us to get one more? My new friend, Cade Williams, is here, and I’m sure he’d love to try one of your milkshakes,” Kennedy says.
“Of course, Mr. Williams, I’ll be right out with that.”
Gwen goes to speak, probably to cancel the order, but Marsha turns and disappears around the corner before she has the chance. “Excuse us for a moment,” Gwen says sweetly before grabbing my arm and dragging me around the corner.
“Ow, you’re hurting me,” I whine. “Put your claws away.”
“Don’t be a wuss. You’re used to pucks flying at your face at a hundred miles per hour, you can handle my little grip.”
I look at her, eyebrows raised, unable to hide my little smirk at the obvious innuendo in her words. It’s enough to have me wondering if she’s thinking about that night too.
“I think we both know I can handle your grip, Tink.”
We stare at each other for a moment before finally she snaps out of it. “What do you need to talk to me about that’s so important it couldn’t be a text.”
“First off, that would involve you actually responding to my texts, and lately that’s been out of the question.”
“Jeez, I wonder why I haven’t really been in the mood to talk to you, Cade. Now cut the shit and talk. I need to get back to lunch.”
“I don’t like you walking home by yourself,” I tell her, which only seems to piss her off more.
“I’m sorry you feel that way. I guess it’s a good thing I’m not yours to worry about.”
“You get off at midnight, in fucking New York City, Gwen. There’s not a chance in hell I’m letting you walk home by yourself. You’re an attractive young woman, and I don’t want to watch you on the next episode of 20/20 from prison,” I grumble.
The one time I texted her to ask what time she was off and if she’d wait for me, she all but told me to fuck off. I could’ve just showed up, but this damn hospital has at like forty-three hundred doors, and with my luck, I’d have been on the opposite end of the hospital when she left.
“I apologize that you have issues with my life choices, but I’m damn well not your problem to deal with,” Gwen snaps, her eyes immediately narrowing as she gets more and more irritated with me.
“Gwen, I’m not fucking joking. People get robbed and kidnapped daily, and you’re a five-foot-one female who weighs practically nothing.”
“I’m not joking either, not all of us have disposable money we can spend how we please.”
“What. Time. Are. You. Off?” I seethe, refusing to back down.
“Why are you even here?”
Her quick change catches me off guard, and honestly, I don’t know how to answer her question.
“I’m not sure.”
“Well, that’s not good enough. Goodbye, Cade.”
She turns to walk away, and I can’t stand it. I can’t stand her not listening to me, not knowing I care about her.
“You’re all I can think about, and I can’t fucking stand it,” I blurt out. Her whole body freezes in place. “I can’t stand that I always want you around me, even when I know the one thing we need is distance,” I snap, more truth coming out than I expected, and by the look on her face when she turns around, I’ve surprised her as well.
She waits for a moment before a tiny smirk appears on her lips.
“Be here at midnight.”
I smile, relieved she’s not fighting me more.
“But you’re leaving right now.”
“What?”
“You’re going to walk back over there with me and tell them you need to leave, something came up, and you need to go. Do you hear me? You. Need. To. Go,” Gwen huffs.
“Whatever you say, Tink,” I smirk, letting her grab my arm and pull me back to the table where the girls are now enjoying their milkshakes. The one Kennedy ordered for me sits next to Gwen’s.
When we get back to our spot, Gwen stops at the edge of the table, looking up at me expectantly, but when I see Kennedy smiling, I can’t risk upsetting her by not taking her offer. After everything that girl is going through, the least I can do is sit and drink a milkshake with her, even if it unleashes Gwen’s wrath on me.
“What flavor did we get?” I scoot past Gwen to sit right next to Kennedy, forcing Gwen to sit across from me, next to Denise.
“Chocolate peanut butter. It’s my favorite,” Kennedy says, her milkshake already half gone. “Are you going to sit down, Gwen? Your milkshake is melting.”
Gwen shakes her head, snapping herself out of whatever daydream or voodoo spell she was trying to cast on me before finally taking the seat across from me.
You’d think spending an evening with a fifteen-year-old wouldn’t be the highlight of my week as a twenty-eight-year-old professional hockey player, but damn, this girl is funny. She’s got the right amount of dry humor mixed with immeasurable kindness, and I can’t help but adore her already.
If I’m being honest, it’s because she reminds me a lot of my sister, Veronica. Yeah, of course, them both needing a kidney is definitely a similarity, but it’s more than that.
Veronica was feisty, bossy, and took no shit. Most of the time she had the driest sense of humor, but the other ten percent was just pure silliness with the stupidest jokes I’d ever heard in my life, but I always ended up folding over in laughter. What I would give to experience that even just once more.
Hell, I’d give my left kidney if it meant I could hear one of those stupid jokes again.
By the time I’ve finished my milkshake, it’s close to nine, and Gwen is standing up, ready to go back to work.
“Thanks for hanging out with us,” Denise says as Kennedy and Gwen start tidying up. “This made her day… it was a rough one, and she was struggling to find joy.”
She looks… worn out. Not in a bad way, but in the kind of way I remember my mom looking when my sister was sick. Beautiful as always, but a deep exhaustion that can only be seen in their eyes.
But this memory gives me an idea.
“Hey, no pressure at all if this doesn’t work out. I understand hospitals have rules, but Miles happens to be one of my best friends, along with Trevor Adams and Harris Danielson. Maybe we could come visit sometime? We could bring Kennedy a signed jersey, cheer her up a bit?”
Her eyes start to well up as she nods, covering her mouth as she mumbles yes. “Sorry. She would love that. We would love that. But if you come when my husband isn’t here, he might actually perish. Could we…” she pauses, glancing over to Gwen and back to me. “Could we have Gwen coordinate with you?”
“Of course you can.” Gwen looks at Denise before turning back to me. “I’ve gotta get back to work. Midnight. Don’t be late, I won’t wait.”
With a salute and a smile, I turn around and walk out of the hospital feeling lighter than I have in weeks, with the memory of my sister fresh on my mind.
I makesure to be at the hospital fifteen minutes before midnight in case Gwen decides to test me and leave early or something. I know for a fact that she wouldn’t hesitate to leave if I wasn’t here the moment she was ready to go.
“Hi,” she says as she walks right up to me. “Is my bodyguard ready to chaperone me home?”
“I wasn’t late, was I? So, I’d say that answer is pretty obvious,” I joke back, but she just glares before turning and starting to walk away.
“What’s got you so grumpy, Tink?”
She turns to me, her eyes narrowed. “Where should I start? I have parents who don’t seem to want to actually know the real me, a guy I hooked up with was a total prick and just up and left like it didn’t fucking matter, and I have a patient who’s going through a really rough time, so my apologies if I’m not all cheery and shooting rainbows out of my ass all the time.”
I just stare, eyes wide, shocked she opened up so much. I was expecting her to yell at me, call me an asshole, or tell me she didn’t want to be around me, which she basically did, but… there’s so much more in that answer. So much truth, so much pain.
I want to know more.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
She stops, her head tilted as she assesses me. “Not really. With my luck, I’ll end up laying it all out there and you’ll disappear without a response,” she huffs, her hands on her hips.
I stare back at her, and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t imagining my hands on her hips, grinding her against me as she rides my cock.
Definitely not what I should be thinking about right now, and based on her eyes narrowing, she’s not amused by my staring.
“I’m not going to do that again, I promise,” I tell her, surprising myself because I’m not one to make promises.
The look on her face when I left her—I’ll never be able to get that out of my mind. That alone will make sure I never do something like that again, which means I need to keep my distance, make sure we keep our boundaries in place.
“Why am I supposed to believe you? I thought we were friends… friends don’t treat each other the way you treated me,” she says quietly. “You hurt me.”
Her words feel like ten thousand little cuts, breaking me apart even further, but all I can think about is how much I’ve already hurt her.
Although I think walking away entirely would hurt her more.
“I’m sorry, Tink. I am. I can’t explain it… I’m broken,” I tell her, not sure how to explain I’m not good enough for her. That I hurt the people I care about.
“I don’t know what to do with you,” Gwen mumbles as we continue walking, the sound of the city all around us. This city never truly sleeps. Even in the middle of the night cars go by constantly, a lot of them honking their horns, and there are people everywhere, yet all I can hear is her.
“I don’t know what to do with myself, either,” I tell her the sad reality of my life.