Chapter 13
OWEN
A month later…
Leaning forward, I shoved my hockey gloves into my bag. The locker room was quiet for this time of day. I was the last one here, which was exactly how I wanted it.
My phone chimed, and I snatched it off the bench, a smile tugging at the corner of my lips when I saw Jax’s name flash across the screen.
Life had been different since the wedding. The one person I thought would always be here was gone, moved to the other side of the country, and took half of his family with him. The other half was somewhere, traveling around the world, and that left Harlow and me.
“What’s up?” I sang into the phone, excited to hear from him.
“Not much,” he answered. “I’m about to head into practice, but Kaia wanted me to call and see if you would check on Harlow. She hasn’t answered Kaia all day, and she’s worried about her. Her location shows she’s at the rink with you right now.”
My smile faded.
Check on Harlow. The last person on earth who wanted to see me. The girl I propositioned like a complete asshole. The one I was actively avoiding because not only was I embarrassed by my behavior, but every time I thought about the look on her face when she walked away from me…
I huffed out a heavy sigh. “Yeah, sure. I’ll shoot Kaia a text if I find her.”
“Thanks. Kaia’s really struggling with leaving Harlow behind. So, maybe you could check on her occasionally and make sure she’s doing ok. She’s alone in that house until mom and Robert get back, and who knows when that will be.”
“Yeah, of course.”
Someone shouted in the background, probably his coach. “Sorry, I gotta go. I’ll call later and catch up.”
He disconnected before I could come up with an excuse, and I shoved my phone into the pocket of my jeans. I stood there, staring at my open locker for longer than I should have.
I hated that Harlow was alone, too. A big part of me wished we could be friends, but I was pretty sure I had screwed up any chance of that happening.
I slammed the metal door shut harder than necessary, the sound echoing through the empty room, and headed toward the ice.
Harlow made her feelings pretty clear at the wedding and every day since, through her avoidance.
Even though I had reached out to her several times, there were no return texts or calls.
Not even a glance in my direction when we passed each other on the ice, at school, or in the halls.
She had perfected the art of looking through me like I was made of glass, and I couldn’t blame her.
I deserved it.
The rink opened up in front of me, the white ice glowing under the industrial lighting. There were a few people scattered around the rink, a figure skater practicing jumps on the far end, a couple of kids taking a lesson near the boards, and a group of hockey players near the box.
And then I saw her.
She was the petite blonde in the middle of the group of hockey players; her laugh carried across the ice. Austin Miller had his arm braced on the boards beside her head, leaning in close, saying something that made her tip her head back and smile.
My vision went red around the edges.
Austin fucking Miller. The guy who went through girls like tissues, discarding them the second the chase was over. The one who was bragging in the locker room last week about breaking in some freshmen. He was currently standing way too close to Harlow, looking at her like she was his next conquest.
Over my dead fucking body.
I was moving before I made the conscious decision to do so, my skates slicing into the ice. Harlow’s gaze lifted, catching mine across the rink, and I watched her expression shift from recognition to something harder. Colder.
I jerked my head toward the exit.
Her jaw flexed, and those pretty blue eyes narrowed, shooting daggers at me with enough force to draw blood. But she got the message. She said something to Austin, and he frowned as he reached for her arm, but he was too late. She was already heading toward the exit.
I was hot on her heels until we made it through the tunnel and into the empty hallway.
“Austin?” I groaned, the name tasting sour on my tongue. “Really?”
She stopped so fast that I nearly slammed into the back of her. She whipped around, her eyes blazing, cheeks flushed with anger. “Yeah.” She shrugged, the gesture deliberately casual. “Why not?”
“Oh, I don’t know.” I huffed out a humorless laugh, running a hand through my still-damp hair. “Maybe because the guy is a dick. He’s a love ‘em and leave ‘em type. He’ll tell you everything you want to hear, get what he wants, and then pretend you don’t exist.”
Something flickered across her face, hurt, maybe, or recognition, before she locked it down behind that wall of ice she’d been constructing since the wedding.
“Well then,” she said, her voice deceptively light, “it wouldn’t be much different than my first time, would it?”
I winced as she turned and stomped off down the hallway.
I followed her. “Hey.” My hand shot out, wrapping around her arm, fingers closing over the soft fabric of her sweater as I jerked her to a stop. She spun to face me, and suddenly we were close, too close, her face inches from mine, her breath coming fast and angry.
“That never should have happened,” I said, and immediately realized how wrong it sounded.
She shook her head slowly, that bitter smile curving her lips. “Thanks for reminding me I was a mistake.” She tried to jerk her arm away, but I tightened my grip, my thumb pressing into the soft skin of her inner wrist where I could feel her pulse racing.
“That’s not what I meant.”
“No?” She cocked her head, challenge written in every line of her body. “Then what did you mean? Please. Enlighten me.”
“I don’t regret that it was you or that.
..” I paused, my words jamming in my throat.
How was I supposed to explain this? How was I supposed to tell her that what I regretted wasn’t her, wasn’t us, but the circumstances?
The timing? The fact that I’d been too drunk to remember any of it and too stupid to handle the aftermath with anything resembling grace?
“Come on, Harlow,” I tried again. “Did you want to hurt Cam?”
The tension in her shoulders relaxed slightly. She shook her head. “No. Of course not.”
“Do you not regret it?”
Her blue eyes held mine, something complicated moving behind them. The anger was still there, simmering beneath the surface, but there was something else too. Something that made my chest ache.
“I guess I regret the timing,” she finally said. “But not that it was you.”
My eyes widened. Of all the things I’d expected her to say, that wasn’t even on the list. “So are you saying that you wanted to lose your virginity to me?”
“I won’t lie and say I’ve never thought about it.” Her gaze dropped to the ground, a flush creeping up her neck. “Which is incredibly embarrassing because you obviously never thought…”
“I wouldn’t say never.”
The words were out before I could stop them. Her eyes snapped back to mine, wide and searching.
Shit. Shit. What was I doing?
“But do not tell Jax,” I added quickly, like that would somehow make this better.
She almost smiled. Almost. “Obviously, I would have rather it happened while you were single and sober. Maybe even before this whole Cam, you, and Trystan mess.”
I stepped closer without meaning to, drawn into her orbit like gravity. Our bodies were nearly touching now, close enough to count the faint freckles across her nose. Her gaze lifted to meet mine.
“I regret when it happened,” I said. “But you want to know the truth?”
Her eyes dropped, lingering on my lips for half a second before darting back up. “What?”
“I regret that I can’t remember…” I dropped my mouth toward hers, letting the heat of my breath fan across her lips, watching her eyes flutter half-closed… “what you taste like.”
Voices echoed around the corner, shattering the moment like glass.
I took a giant step back, shoving my hands in my pockets like they might betray me otherwise. My gaze shifted in the direction of the noise, my heart hammering against my ribs.
What the fuck was I doing?
This was Harlow. Jax’s sister. The girl I’d already hurt once, who was still angry with me, who deserved so much better than whatever half-assed, impulsive thing I was about to drag her into.
A group of my teammates rounded the corner: Stanley, Ryder, Brandon, and Logan, their gear bags slung over their shoulders, still high on that post-workout energy.
“Owen,” Stanley shouted as they strolled up to us. His gaze flickered to Harlow, interest sparking in his eyes, making my jaw clench. “What’s up, man?”
“Nothing,” I said, way too defensive. “What are you guys still doing here?”
“We were working out after practice.” Ryder pulled his black backpack up higher on his shoulder. “We’re heading to Greg’s now for a few drinks. You want to come?”
“Uh.” I nodded, grasping for the lifeline.
“Yeah.” I didn’t really want to go. What I wanted was to finish what I’d started, to drag Harlow somewhere private and find out exactly what she tasted like, but that was precisely why I needed to leave.
Distance. Boundaries. All the things I was spectacularly bad at.
“Hey, Harlow.” Brandon stepped forward, flashing her an all-white smile, and my fists clenched at my sides. “Do you want to come too?”
Harlow smiled at him in a way she hadn’t looked at me in weeks.
“Actually,” I said, cutting in before she could answer, “Harlow was heading home.”
Her head snapped toward me, those blue eyes narrowing into dangerous slits. “Excuse me?”
“You heard me.”
“I heard you.” She crossed her arms. “I’m trying to figure out when exactly I gave you permission to speak for me.”
The guys exchanged looks, sensing the tension crackling between us.
“Come on, Harlow,” I said, stepping closer, lowering my voice. “You don’t want to hang out with these idiots.”
“Oh, but I do.” Her smile turned sharp. “They seem nice. Friendly. The kind of guys who actually want me around, instead of only acknowledging my existence when it’s convenient for them.”
The barb landed exactly where she’d aimed it.
Clenching my teeth, I flashed her a warning look. “That’s not…”
“I’ll meet you guys there.” She turned away from me and smiled at him.
“Awesome.” Logan grinned like a stupid fool, practically bouncing on his heels, and I wanted to put my fist through his face. “You need directions, or…”
“She’s not going,” I growled, my fist clenched at my sides.
Everyone went still.
Harlow turned back to me slowly. The anger was back, burning bright, but underneath it was… Surprise, maybe. Or satisfaction. Like she was waiting to see how far she could push me.
“Who’s going to stop me?” She stepped closer, tilting her chin up, a cocky, arrogant smile playing at her lips. She pressed her chest to mine, and heat radiated off her body. Every instinct in me screamed to pull her close and…
“Harlow.” Her name came out as a warning.
“Owen.” She threw it right back at me, mocking me.
“I said you’re not going.”
She laughed, and the sound scraped against every one of my nerve endings. “Last time I checked, you don’t own me. You don’t get to decide where I go or who I talk to. That’s not how this works.”
“That’s not…” I ran a hand through my hair, frustration boiling over. “I’m trying to protect you.”
“From what? Having fun? Making friends? Moving on with my life instead of waiting around for someone who can’t figure out what he wants?”
“I’ll see you guys there,” she said to my teammates, not breaking eye contact with me. Then she swirled around and walked away, ponytail swinging; every single step she made radiated defiance.
I watched her go with my hands clenched at my sides.
“Dude.” Stanley let out a low whistle. “What the fuck was that about?”
I whipped around. “What the fuck? Harlow Cruz is off-limits.” There was an unspoken rule between teammates: you don’t fuck their exes, and you didn’t mess with each other’s sisters. Everyone knew it.
“No, she’s not.” Stanley laughed, clapping me on the shoulder. “Jax is gone, man. Harlow’s fair game this year.”
Anger raced through my veins. Harlow was off-limits regardless of Jax’s location.
“I won’t lie,” Brandon said, oblivious to the murder in my eyes. “Harlow’s fucking hot. I’ve wanted to ask her out for a few years now.”
“Good luck.” Logan elbowed him. “She’ll never go for you when she could have me.”
Apparently, none of them could read the room.
I stepped up to Logan, bumping my chest against his hard enough to make him stumble back.
“Let me make this very clear.” My gaze shifted through all of them, making sure each one understood.
“Harlow is still off-limits, and if I find out any of you so much as look at her, I will put my fist through your fucking face. Do you understand me?”
Silence.
“Whoa, man.” Brandon held up his hands and backed away. “Our bad. We didn’t know you had a thing for her.”
“What?” My face scrunched up. “I don’t. Harlow’s like a…”
I trailed off.
I couldn’t say it. Couldn’t force the word sister past my lips because Harlow was nothing like a sister to me. I would never look at a sister the way I looked at Harlow. My body would never react the way it did around Harlow with a sister. I would never fantasize about fucking my sister.
“Just stay away from her,” I finished lamely.
I didn’t wait for their response. I twisted and ran after Harlow, hoping to catch up with her before she got to her car and drove off to meet up with a bunch of guys who would fall all over themselves trying to get her attention.
The possessiveness burning in my chest made no sense. I had no claim on her. No right to feel this way.
But I felt it anyway.