Chapter 13 – pippa
PIPPA
“Tell me when,” Cat says, pouring red wine into my glass. She pours it until it’s about three fourths of the way full, then stops. “You didn’t say when.”
I sink back in the café chair. “Because I need a lot of wine tonight. It’s been a long freaking day.”
We’re at the Copper Cup, our favorite little café and bookstore. Cat and I try to meet up there for Wine Wednesdays. Of course, it’s been a while since Cat’s had a Wednesday free. She and Nate travel so much for work that I think her passport might die of exhaustion.
I take a long sip of my wine, savoring the taste. Cat watches me sympathetically.
“Let me guess. Work is crazy?”
I shake my head. “Like you wouldn’t believe. With the 12 Dates of Christmas articles blowing up, I spent all morning answering reader questions in the forums. At least Ingrid let me out in the afternoon so I could check out some apartments.”
“Anything good?”
“Let’s just say, my top choice apartment is in a basement under a butcher shop. The downside is that the whole apartment smells like deli meat. But hey, on the upside, if any intruders want to rob me, they’ll have to get through five Italian guys with cleavers.”
Cat shudders. “You can’t live there. I know you want to get away from Ryan, but dating’s only going to be harder if you start smelling like salami.”
“Don’t worry. My standards haven’t dropped that low. I’ll keep looking for places, ones that are on or above ground level. But let’s not dwell on my depressing life.”
“It’s not depressing!” Cat says fiercely. “Your article started an actual TikTok trend. That’s huge, and I’m super proud of you.”
I duck my head. “It’s just a trend. It’ll disappear soon.”
“No, it won’t. It’s only going to get bigger the more articles you publish. I know it, because you’re the smartest woman I know, and the best writer I’ve ever read.”
My chest warms. Cat has no idea how much I needed to hear that. At work, Ingrid uses every success as a reason to give me more assignments. Actual praise from someone who cares about me is so much more important.
“Tell me about this work trip,” I say. “You’re going to…Japan? And for the record, I’m only a little jealous of your new international jetsetting lifestyle.”
Cat laughs and shakes her head. “Japan is in January. Tonight, we’re leaving for Australia.”
“Ooo, land of Lord of the Rings!”
“You’re thinking of New Zealand. I don’t think UPS has any branches out there, but I’ll have to ask Nate.”
“That’s fine. You can hit Hobbiton the next time. Can you bring me home a koala?” I ask.
“Do I hear you trying to convince my fiancée to traffic an exotic animal?” a deep voice says.
Cat grins when she sees Nate standing behind us. “You’re here early!”
He shoots me an apologetic look. “I planned to come later, but I overestimated the traffic. I don’t want to interrupt girls’ night.”
“No, go ahead, take a seat,” I say, pointing to the seat next to Cat.
It’s a bit of a relief that he’s here. I’ve spent the whole day going back and forth about whether or not I should tell Cat what’s happening with me and Ryan. Now that Nate’s here, I have an excuse to chicken out about it.
Cat’s always been supportive, but she’s not afraid to call me out on my bad decisions. I’m just not sure how she’d take it. Hell, I don’t even know how I’m taking it, myself.
All I know is that after Ryan left my room last night, I was wetter than I’ve ever been in my whole life.
The second he closed the door, my hand was down my shorts, putting out the fire Ryan started between my thighs.
The picture he drew with his words was just too much.
It stuck in my head the whole time I wrote that stupid Dom Etiquette for the Kink-Curious article.
I was wet the whole time I edited it, too.
It’s a new low of professionalism for me, but I can’t bring myself to regret it.
I shake my head, trying to dispel the memories.
“So, you’re leaving for Australia, huh?” I ask Nate.
“Yes. We’ll have to leave for the airport in about twenty minutes.”
“I’m sorry I have to leave early,” Cat says. “This was the only flight that would get us to Sydney in time for our meetings.”
I turn to Nate. “You couldn’t convince her to fly private, huh?”
He sighs. “Apparently, flying commercial is better for the environment. And we care more about climate change than we do about convenience, comfort, or luxury.”
“Hey, if your private jet gets lonely, I’m always prepared to keep it company.”
“You could, you know,” he says seriously. “If you ever want to take a trip somewhere, I’d be happy to set it up for you.”
Warmth spreads through my chest. Nate really would do anything to make Cat happy. I bet he’d even fly me out to France and rent Versailles for me if Cat really wanted him to. She deserves someone who’s that devoted to her.
“I’m good for now, but if I get the sudden urge to change time zones, I’ll let you know,” I tell him.
“Can I get you anything, Nate?” Brinley, the manager of the Copper Cup and my friend, approaches our table without her usual smile. She’s Luke’s sister, and the two of them have never exactly gotten along. Her rancor for him apparently extends to all of his friends, Nate included.
“No, thanks,” Nate says. “We’re leaving soon.”
“Oh! But I actually have a message for you from your brother,” I say, remembering. After everything that happened with Ryan last night, I completely forgot my earlier conversation with the guys.
Brinley scowls. “Let me guess, this has something to do with all the texts he keeps sending?”
Wow. I knew Brinley and Luke weren’t pals, but she’s usually not so venomous. “Yeah, but it’s nothing bad. He wants to invite you to a White Elephant party with the guys.”
“I’ll pass,” she says, walking away immediately.
“What was that all about?” I ask Nate, who shrugs.
“No idea.”
We spend a few more minutes catching up, but time goes by fast, and soon enough I’m standing to say goodbye to Cat and Nate. She squeezes me tight. “Be safe,” she whispers in my ear. “I love you.”
My eyes sting with tears. “I love you, too.” And I miss having you all to myself, no matter how unfair that is.
Once Cat and Nate leave, I nurse my glass of wine and stare into space.
Normally, I’d spend the time browsing the bookstore or catching up on emails, but I think I need a little time to clear my head.
Why did Ryan tell me all that, about being a Dom?
Was he messing with me, trying to show how uncomfortable he could make me?
Or was he bragging, trying to show off his prowess?
Worst of all, what if he wanted it just as much as I did?
We’ve already crossed too many lines. If Mom had any idea what I was doing with Ryan, she’d be horrified. But if I don’t find a new place soon, I’m scared that I won’t be able to resist.
The front door of the café chimes as a couple leaves, breaking me out of my reverie. I’ve been sitting here, thinking for longer than I meant to. I drain the last dregs of my wine as Brinley makes her way over.
“I guess I should pay for my drinks and let you close.”
“Actually, Nate paid for it already,” she says, shrugging. “He said if he wasn’t sneaky about it, you might try to pay for it yourself.”
I laugh. “I’d never fight him for the check. Nate’s still getting to know me. He doesn’t know how much I love a free drink yet.”
“Can I get you anything else?”
I glance down at my empty glass. I’m not ready to go home, not when there’s the possibility that I’ll have to face Ryan. I still have no idea where we stand.
“Would you hate me if I ordered another glass of wine? I just really don’t want to go back to my apartment yet.”
Brinley smiles. “Fine by me. Let me go to the back and grab one of the good bottles.”
While she goes back behind the bar, the last patrons in the café grab their coats and leave. Now I feel bad—Brinley will be stuck at work until I finish my drink.
“Is everyone gone?” Brinley asks when she returns with a bottle of red wine in hand.
“Yup. It’s just me. You can kick me out whenever you want to.”
Brinley fiddles nervously with her apron. “Actually, do you want company? I could really use a glass too. No pressure if you want some time to yourself.”
I perk up immediately. “Please drink with me! I’d love that.”
Thank god. I could use another girl to talk to. Cat’s done her best to be there for me since she got engaged, but it’s not enough. She’s constantly traveling for work, and I know she wants to enjoy her time with her fiancé. But I’ve been lonely.
Brinley grabs an extra glass from behind the bar, then gives us both a generous pour.
“Cheers,” I say, holding up my glass. She clinks it, and we both take a long drink.
“So, you’re living with Ryan now?” she asks. “How’s that going?”
“Exactly how you think it’s going,” I say darkly. “He lives for every opportunity to torture me.”
Brinley nods. “All those guys are the worst.”
“Oh, for sure.” I take another sip of my wine. It’s dry, crisp, and delicious. “How well do you know them?”
“Better than I’d like. Obviously, Luke and I aren’t on the best of terms, so I didn’t spend too much time hanging out with them.
Let’s just say, I know a lot of women that those guys messed around with.
Their egos are so big, they think it doesn’t matter how they treat people.
Women are just happy to bask in their presence. ”
I cringe. “I bet Ryan is the worst of them.”
“He’s definitely the sluttiest—no offense. But they’re all awful in their own ways.” She ticks them off on their fingers. “James, cold and heartless. Nate, grumpy and selfish, except with Cat, apparently. Luke uses his charm to get away with literal murder. And Beau…well, Beau is just infuriating.”
“You’re mostly right, but Nate’s not so bad,” I admit. “Yes, he treats Cat really well, but he also buys me wine.”
Brinley thinks for a moment. “Fine. Maybe I was wrong about Nate. But he’s still a grump.”
“No arguments there.” I laugh. “The sky could start raining diamonds and chocolate bars and all Nate would do was glare at it.”
“I think we have a children’s book in stock where it rains chocolate,” Brinley says.
“Maybe I should get that for Nate for Christmas.”
“Got much shopping left do you have to do?”
“I’m mostly done.
“I can’t believe Cat’s already engaged,” Brinley says. “Feels like just yesterday she was in here, talking about how dating him was a bad idea. What about you? Are you seeing anyone?”
“Actually, I’m seeing twelve someones. It’s for a series of articles at work, where I go out on twelve Christmas-y dates with different guys.”
Brinley tilts her head. “All different guys?”
“It seemed like a good idea when I pitched it to my editor, but it’s been exhausting. I’ve been on four dates so far, and there were zero winners. I can’t believe I have eight to go.”
“Damn, eight dates. That’s more than I’ve been on in”—she counts silently on her fingers—“three years?”
I laugh. “Me too. If you don’t count hook-ups. I don’t know how Carrie Bradshaw did it.”
“Well, it probably helped that she was fictional. If I was making up my own love life, I’d have an Aidan too.”
“I probably would be toxic and make up a Mr. Big, with the way my life choices have been going,” I grumble.
“Wait, so what happens if you like one of the twelve guys? Do you still have to go out with the rest of them?”
“I guess I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it. All my dates have been total disasters. But I guess that also makes them fun to read.”
“So there’s no one you’re interested in?”
Brinley looks at me, her expression open and curious, and I’ve got the sudden impulse to spill everything about Ryan.
I just wish I could have someone on my side, to tell me if I’ve completely lost my mind.
Even though Brinley and I are getting closer, though, dropping the whole I touched myself thinking about my stepbrother thing might be a bridge too far.
Instead I say, “There’s a guy I’m interested in. We definitely have chemistry, but there are…circumstances in the way.”
She leans in with keen interest in her eyes, resting her chin on her clasped hands.
“Oooo, I’m intrigued. You know that’s how every good romance starts, right?
First it’s ‘let’s just keep things casual’, and then it’s ‘I can’t stay away from you’, and before you know it he’s monologuing about his tragic backstory while you’re making out by the Christmas tree. ”
I blink. “That’s…oddly specific.”
Her throat bobs and she lets out a little laugh that doesn’t reach her eyes. “I read a lot.” she indicated the stacks of books surrounding us in her cafe. “Consider that my professional prediction.”
I shake my head. “It’s just not possible for us to ever date.”
Brinley nods. “I know what that’s like. Boys are complicated.”
“We should figure out a way to replace them. I’m thinking maybe a sexy robot.”
“Like C3PO?”
I choke on my wine. “You mean the gold British robot from Star Wars? Are you serious?”
“I don’t know! Can you think of a hotter robot?”
“The Terminator. The Iron Giant. Optimus Prime. And—hear me out—WALL-E.”
“No.” Brinley slaps her hand on the table. “You can’t make fun of me for saying C3PO when you bring up a cartoon garbage can.”
“Because C3PO’s obviously gay. He and R2-D2 have a thing.”
“WALL-E has no legs, no fingers, and no genitals. What are you even going to do with him?”
“Pick up trash and save the world. Duh.”
Brinley giggles. I swirl my wine in my glass, thinking. “You know what, you really should come to the White Elephant party. I’ve got a trick up my sleeve that I think you might enjoy. If you’re there, I know at least one person will laugh.”
She sighs. “I don’t know. I don’t think I’d have much fun.”
“I promise you would! Cat and I will be there, but we need more women to counter the testosterone levels. If you don’t enjoy yourself, then we’ll ditch the party and go dancing downstairs.”
“Ugh…fine. I guess if we can leave, then I’ll go.”
I pump my fists in the air. “Yes! You won’t regret this, Brinley.”
“I really think I will,” she says before she drains the rest of her wine.