Chapter 11 #2
I’m not counting the seconds, and I don’t feel the need to look away. I’m caught in them.
‘Your work in the lab has been exemplary.’
I can’t help my blush. ‘Thank you.’
‘You’re coming to the party tonight?’
I nod.
‘Good. We’re initiating the pledges at nine in the basement, and then it’s a no holds barred night of fun.’
I nod. I know this, and I know the basement is only for members, so I won’t be going to that part, which is fine with me.
‘Okay. I’ll see you after your creepy ceremony,’ I say, unable to help teasing him a little.
He laughs. ‘Later, Daisy.’
I take a long shower, using it to let the tension melt out of my shoulders. The past couple of weeks has been constant and full-on. There hasn’t been much time to just sit in the quiet and I’m beginning to feel it. I know I’ll need to make some time for self-care, or I’m going to burn out. I promise myself I’ll put aside an hour every morning for a run and some quiet sitting time in the evenings before bed after tonight .
When I’m done, I use the hair dryer I find in the cupboard under the sink and blow out my hair so that it’s straight and dry. I go back to my room and put on my costume while Lu does her cat makeup in the mirror.
The black bodycon minidress she’s brought is so short that I know I’ll be tugging it down all night. The heels are black and sparkly platform wedges, and I turn one this way and that under the light for a good few seconds, watching it sparkle before I put them on.
I mince around the room a bit to get used to them, taking pointers from Lu on how to walk in them effectively because I feel like a giant and I’m a bit wobbly. Then, I sit in my desk chair and try to be patient as Lu smokes my eyes, rouges my cheeks and does whatever else she’s doing that counts as ‘magic’ in her book.
It takes ages, but when she’s done my jaw drops. I stare at myself in the mirror. My eyes are large and dark, my lashes long, my eyebrows perfect. My lips are dark red and full.
‘It really is magic,’ I breathe, and she laughs.
I turn and try a wiggle to see if the dress rides up. It’s not too bad, though, and I think it’ll be fine as long as I’m careful and don’t bend over.
I try it with my normal underwear and Lu shakes her head.
‘That’s not going to work with that dress, honeybunny. Go commando.’
I frown at her but I take them off, telling myself I need to be extra extra careful.
I glance at the clock and see that it’s already nine-fifteen. I go over my rules while Lu wrangles her feet into some camel-colored stiletto boots that come up to her thighs.
Don’t have any alcohol. Don’t trust anyone if they say it’s just juice. No drinking games. Talk to people. Converse and find things out about the Novelles .
‘You can do this,’ Lu says, sensing my nervousness. ‘I’ll be there, too.’
I nod and take a steadying breath.
We leave my room, closing the door behind us and descending the stairs. I could feel the thumping of the music from my room, but as we get closer, I can hear laughter and cheering, and I begin to see people milling around talking. A couple of the pledges are coming up the stairs and they cheer when they see us.
I decided to at least pretend that I’m letting bygones be bygones, despite how they treated me when they started being nicer to me, in case they know anything. I congratulate them both on becoming members of KIP with a smile.
One of them looks genuinely perplexed and stops in the hall in front of me.
Lu keeps going down to the party, giving me a thumbs up.
‘Why are you not mad?’ he asks. ‘We’ve been dicks to you, Daisy.’
I shrug. ‘Holding grudges takes too much energy. Besides, it was just part of the hazing.’
‘You knew about it? You were in on it?’
I laugh and lie. ‘Of course I was in on it!’
I leave him looking a little shocked and go down to the kitchen. Just like before, there’s a drinking game going on at the table that I don’t understand. This time, I avoid it completely and go into the games room looking for Shade, Blake, and Mav. I notice Lu mingling in the hall with a couple of the sophomores, and she winks at me.
I wink back as I go past, following our plan which is to canvas the party separately to cover more ground.
I find the guys playing pool. Shade is dressed as a pirate complete with a fake bird on his shoulder and eyepatch. Blake is a vampire with tiny vampire teeth that seem to fit over his k-9s. I grin as I notice Mav in a plaid shirt and suspenders.
A lumberjack?
A few of the other boys are around the table in various costumes along with three girls who are also dressed as cats. I think I recognize them as some of the Laurie clones and I roll my eyes. That explains Lu’s idea of having us dress this way. We’ll blend in with the others as the night wears on and senses are dulled by alcohol.
Shade takes his shot, shooting a ball into the corner pocket. He looks up and his eyes snare me, moving up and down, not blinking. His nostrils flare as he straightens. Blake turns at his expression and he swallows visibly, nudging Mav.
‘What?’ he asks as he turns and he notices me.
‘Jesus,’ he breathes, stepping forward. ‘You look fucking amazing,’ he says, getting very close but not touching.
I crane my neck to watch his face, fascinated by the tells I can see in his tense jaw, soft eyes, and the way he licks his bottom lip.
‘Can I get you a drink?’ he asks.
‘Yes, please,’ I whisper, feeling as if I’ve lost my voice but for once not because I’m upset. ‘Something without alcohol?’
‘Mocktail it is,’ he smiles and leaves the room.
I stand next to Blake and watch him take his turn. His ball goes in as well, and when he’s done, he turns to me and steps closer.
‘You look good enough to eat,’ he purrs, flashing his vamp teeth, while in the background I see Shade raise his fist and utter a loud ‘Arrrrgh!’.
I can’t help my laugh.
‘Are you all in character?’ I ask.
Blake steps even closer. ‘If we are, then I’m definitely going to bite you after Shade kidnaps you and takes you to his ship.’
I shiver at his words, the way his breath makes my skin tingle. I don’t want to give into it, into them, but I can’t help it. The taste they gave me lives rent-free in my head. I think about it all the time.
‘And Mav?’ I breathe.
He backs up with a scoff. ‘Fuck him. The idiot decided to be a lumberjack for Halloween! He can go chop down a tree and think about his dumb choices.’
I break into peals of laughter, wrapping my arms around my middle and almost doubling over. But I remember I can’t just in time!
Mav returns with a cup and I take a sip. It’s orange, citrusy, and refreshing.
‘What is it?’ I ask.
‘It’s a tequila sunrise without the tequila.’
‘Thanks,’ I say.
I stand with the guys, watching them play pool.
‘Want to take my shot, kitten?’
I roll my eyes at Blake and take his cue. He smirks as he pries my fingers off the wood and repositions them.
‘Like that.’
I look at the table and find the manilla ball in the middle. Careful not to touch any of the others and conscious of my skirt, I hit it toward the red solid and watch as it rolls into the nearest pocket.
‘Great shot!’ Blake exclaims. ‘Daisy’s on my team!’
I smile at him.
‘Beginner’s luck,’ Shade mutters, but he flashes his teeth when he says it.
I cant my head and give him a wink like Lu gave me earlier and his brows rise at me.
‘Or it’s just math,’ I say .
Mav takes the next one and misses and then Blake does as well. Shade gets one, a nice shot off the side, which impresses me, but he misses the second, so it’s my turn again.
I’m lining up to take my shot when I feel a hand graze the bottom of my ass cheek. I yelp and straighten only to feel Blake pulling my hem down lower and sandwiching me between him and the table.
‘Are you not wearing any underwear?’ he breathes in my ear.
I shiver involuntarily and bite my lip as I look back at him. His eyes track the movement. I let it go immediately.
‘There was a line,’ I whisper.
‘Take your shot, kitten. I’ll make sure no one can see.’
‘Thanks.’ I turn back to the table and lean forward, lining up the cue with the ball.
I draw it back, and just as I let it go, I hear:
‘What the fuck is the kid killer doing here?’
Laurie.
I miss the pocket, the ball jumps off the table and it thuds to the carpeted floor. I wince.
Shade and Mav, who must not have heard the queen bee bitch, high five each other.
‘This game is arrrrghs!’
‘Sorry,’ I say to Blake, who’s still just behind me.
But when I turn, I find his eyes on Jolie. She’s got her hand lightly touching his bicep with a little smile on her face while she opens and shuts her eyes rapidly.
Something curls through me at the sight and I suddenly feel a little sick. I push it away. I have a job to do here tonight.
‘Do you need to wash out your eyes?’ I ask, barely noticing that Laurie is standing there too.
She looks at me, her eyes squinting. ‘What?’
I tilt my head at her. ‘You look like there’s something in your eyes. Maybe you should go to the bathroom and wash them out. Is it the makeup? My friend gave me MAC to wear tonight, which seems really good.’ I blink, testing it as I speak and then nod. ‘Yeah, it’s really good, but if your brand is irritating your eyes, you should definitely get it off. Can’t be too careful when it comes to eyes.’
‘I—,’ she splutters at me. ‘No! There’s nothing wrong with my makeup or my eyes , you freak.’
Blake is shaking next to me and I glance up to see him laughing. I frown, the nasty feeling coming back. Is Blake laughing at me?
‘Okay,’ I murmur with a bit of a grimace as I look away.
The odd sensation coils low in my gut.
I’m getting upset about something, but I’m not sure what.
Laurie isn’t paying attention. Though she’s standing next to her friend, her eyes are on Shade and the game ... but mostly on Shade.
‘Get over your little trip the other day?’ Jolie asks me with a sweet smile.
‘Yes, thank you,’ I say, though my chest still twinges a little. ‘I tend to heal quickly. I’m a bit clumsy, you see, so I’m used to it.’
She opens and closes her mouth but doesn’t seem sure of what she should say next.
‘Can I play?’ Laurie asks Shade and Mav, her eyes twitching as well, and I wonder if they both use the same brand of mascara.
Whatever it is, I want to find out the name so that I don’t waste my money on it.
But before I can voice my question, Jolie’s hand tightens on Blake’s arm. ‘Wanna go somewhere, baby?’ she asks in a weird, low voice, kind of like Marilyn Monroe in one of her old movies .
‘In the middle of a game,’ Blake murmurs, his eyes flicking to me for a second before he looks back at her.
‘Come on, Blakley ,’ she whines a little. ‘You know how you like my tongue wrapped around your?—’
I turn away, my nose wrinkling in disgust. That feeling is worse, bordering on physical pain. I leave the room with my drink in hand and push everything away until I don’t feel anything but a bit confused.
‘Daisy?’ I hear Mav say.
I turn back with the normal smile plastered on my face, but don’t really look at any of them.
‘Just heading to the bathroom,’ I say, excusing myself from the room.
I’m not here to talk to them anyway, I’m here to learn what people say about Shade’s family. I just need to wait until people are drunker and more loose-lipped.
So, I put the guys from my mind. I definitely don’t let my eyes stray toward the games room, wondering what they’re doing, if Jolie took Blake somewhere to suck him off, if Laurie is playing pool in my place. I have no right to feel annoyed.
They aren’t mine and it’s for the best.
Blake clearly lied to me when he said he didn’t have a girlfriend.
I don’t like that. I wonder if Mav was lying, too. Is one of these girls going to be with him in his room later? Am I going to have to listen to them all?—
I stand up with a sharp intake of breath and walk across the room to deposit my cup in the kitchen sink.
‘Are you okay?’ Lu asks as she fills her cup from the keg next to me.
I nod. ‘Have you learned anything interesting?’
She snorts. ‘Only that the freshmen are pissed that they have to clean up after this party because the house staff don’t start until next week, and the keg was a gift from some sorority.’ She looks out over the room. ‘But it’s early. I’ll be close by, Daisy-bear.’
‘Have fun, Lulu,’ I deadpan.
She turns with a cheeky expression. ‘Ooh! Lulu . I like it.’
Over the next few minutes, no one really pays attention to me, and I go back to my perch to daydream. When I next really start looking around, I see that things are quickly going exactly how I wanted.
It’s not long before I join the beer pong game. I’ve been watching them for a while and I am confident that I know the rules enough that I won’t get into trouble like I did last time.
I don’t aim to be taken advantage of tonight. I glance at Lu, who’s in the kitchen doing shots with one of the Sophomores, only he seems to be doing way more than she is. She gives me a surreptitious wink and I nod.
My partner, David, is a pledge... well, I guess a member of the frat now. I put in all the effort possible to not only play well, so that he respects my gaming abilities, but also to chat to him in what I hope is a normal manner. I employ every lesson I can remember Ms. Tremaine drilling into me regarding social etiquette.
Thirty minutes in, I’ve only had to drink once, and he’s three sheets to the wind. He’s slurring his words a little and keeps putting his arm around my shoulder while cheering, ‘Frat Girl!’ ‘Frat Girl!’
I resist the urge to throw him off of me, the feel of his fingers on my neck making me cringe inside. The party has gotten loud and frenzied. It’s taking everything in me not to run, and I know I’m going to be done-for tomorrow even without alcohol.
Ten minutes later, the game is somehow over and it looks like I won. David is jumping up and down, his hands around my waist as he whoops and hollers.
I try not to roll my eyes. Instead I give him a huge smile. ‘Great game!’ I say as enthusiastically as I can muster in my current state, but if my inflection is off, he’s too drunk to notice.
I pull him away into a quieter room and sit with him on the couch, trying not to wonder why I haven’t seen any of the guys walking around the party. Where are they? Who are they with? God, I’m pathetic.
I make sure David has a beer in his hand and I clink it with mine. ‘To an amazing game of beer pong!’
He gives me a high five. It’s hard and makes my palm smart.
I add it to the long list of things I’m not enjoying about tonight.
‘So,’ I start casually, ‘congrats on getting full-member rights.’
He grins. ‘Yeah, it’s been great! Everyone here has been awesome, too.’
I almost gag at the blatant company line. Perhaps he’s just not drunk enough to speak the truth yet. Surely he can’t believe that everything is wonderful here, can he? Over the past weeks, he and the other pledges have basically been slaves for the entire house as far as I can tell.
‘Hey, I wanted to say I’m sorry. I didn’t like being mean to you and calling you names and stuff. They told us that was part of it.’
He’s apologizing to my cleavage.
‘Don’t worry about it,’ I say, seeing my in. ‘I mean I could see how hard they made it for you guys, especially Shade. The Novelles .... well, you know how they are.’
I smile, I hope disarmingly .
‘Yeah,’ he agrees and then frowns at me. ‘Aren’t you a Novelle?’
‘No, actually my mom just married Shade’s dad. I’m no more a Novelle than you are. Thank God . Right?’
I chuckle a little, and then I take a sip of my drink and I wait, letting the silence lengthen.
Normies don’t like the silence, I’ve noticed. They try to fill it with chit chat. Most of them can’t seem to help it. The blanks did it all the time while they went about their days, and I learned all sorts of interesting things.
‘Seriously,’ he murmurs.
I nod, saying nothing.
‘My parents and I were at that benefit. The one she was at before she ... you know.’ He frowns as if he’s remembering something.
My eyes watch him very carefully, and he doesn’t say anything more. I roll my eyes.
‘I mean it was so hard for John. To lose his wife, you know? Shade, too.’ I probe.
‘Yeah, I can only imagine. It was lucky Mr. Novelle wasn’t in the car when she went down that embankment, or he would have been killed too. And Shade and Andy. I heard from my brother who graduated last year that they were really broken up by her death, you know? Poor guys.’
She was my actual mom , I want to say, but I don’t.
‘Poor guys,’ I echo instead. ‘I mean she was the only mom they ever knew. For her to be taken so suddenly like that after a fun night with family and friends ...’
I might puke, but at least he’s nodding away so maybe it’ll be worth it.
Maybe I am a little mad at Shade and Andy that they got to have my mom in my absence after all.
‘It was just weird, you know? ’
‘What was weird?’ I ask after a moment, hoping I don’t sound too excited.
‘I was out front having a smoke. At the benefit. My parents don’t know, so I was in the shadows away from everyone, you know?’
‘Right,’ I urge, taking another sip of the beer I don’t like while wishing he’d hurry the fuck up.
‘And, well, I’d had a few, but I could have sworn I saw John Novelle driving.’
I sit bolt upright. ‘What? But you just said he wasn’t in the car.’
‘Which was weird,’ he continues as if he hasn’t heard me, ‘because, and I remember thinking the same thing that night. Why would Mr. Novelle be driving his own car? He’s one of the richest guys for five hundred miles. Dude has like two chauffeurs. ’ David chuckles. ‘He literally said to my dad once that he hates driving himself places. Crazy, huh?’
‘So John was in the car?’
David hiccups and then belches.
He doesn’t say, ‘excuse me’.
‘Yeah, he was in the car,’ he mutters. ‘I’m sure I saw him in the drivers’ seat, but after the accident, they said she was alone, so I probably just got it wrong.’
The oblivious idiot goes back to staring at my chest.
‘Was Shade there that night?’ I ask, as nonchalantly as I can considering my brain has begun whirring like an engine.
David shakes his head. ‘Andy was, though.’
Andy was there, too?
‘Well, thanks so much for the game, David. I’m just going to run to the loo.’
He looks at me blankly.
‘The bathroom,’ I clarify, realizing I used the English word .
‘Oh, right, sure,’ he gives me an easy smile, his eyes running over me. ‘Hurry back, babe.’
Ugh, no.
‘Sure thing!’ I put the smile on my face and leave David to rejoin the party, my brain jumping around like it’s on hot coals.
John and Andy were at the benefit that night, but not Shade. None of them were mentioned in the papers at all regarding the benefit my mom was at. None of the photos attached to the articles even showed them there. I’d assumed she was there alone. And why wasn’t Shade there if the others were?
I wander around a little aimlessly, half looking for Lu while I think.
John may have been in the car with my mom. According to David, he drove them home. But the news said she was alone in the car, that she drank too much and veered off the road. The car went down a steep embankment and she was thrown out of the convertible because she hadn’t been wearing her seatbelt. It was cut and dry according to law enforcement. It was on a bend where crashes like that happen, on average, twice a year.
I don’t see Lu anywhere, so I go into the games room, just sort of hoping for a friendly face, but it’s not Shade and the others playing pool anymore. It’s Marcus and his friends. All three are dressed like doctors with white coats and glasses. There’s a smell of smoke in the room and I’m suddenly frozen to the spot.
I’m in Stoke’s office. I’m at The Heath.
I’m not there. I’m not there.
But they see me before I can move, and they’re suddenly all around me. I can’t hear what they’re saying over the roaring in my ears. Their hands are on me. I can feel the wall behind me .
My face is gripped hard and hands grab my arms when I try to struggle. My chin is raised and my cheeks squeezed to open my mouth. Something is poured into it from a bottle. It burns its way down my throat, making me cough and splutter. My eyes swim with involuntary tears and I can make out Marcus’s furious looking face. He smiles darkly.
‘It’s just juice, retard. Drink it.’
I try to shake out of their hands, but I’m trapped.
‘Stop,’ I try to say.
‘I lost my spot in the lab because of you’ Marcus snarls in my ear. ‘You made me look like an idiot, you fucking bitch.’ He pours more of the liquor down my throat. ‘Drink up, whore. You’re about to have the best night of your life.’
‘Oh, shit! Look at this, she ain’t even wearing underwear!’
‘I’m not a neurologist anymore,’ one of them announces, grinding on me. ‘I’m a gynecologist!’
‘Shut the door. Put her on the pool table.’
No.
I struggle anew, my head fuzzy and my nails catch one of their faces.
I’m on the ground. My ears are ringing. One of them hit me, I realize.
‘What the fuck is going on in here!’
There’s the sound of meat slapping and some begging in my periphery.
A shadow looms over me and I get to my feet. I can’t see properly through my tears, I can’t really hear either, but he’s definitely speaking to me. His hands are coming toward me. I kick off my shoes as I pull my dress down and back away, shaking my head.
I feel the door at my back.
The door!
I turn, rip it the rest of the way open, and run.
‘Daisy! ’
Mav.
But I don’t stop. Wiping my eyes as I go, I get to the kitchen. People aren’t watching me. Everyone’s wasted and I’m probably not far behind thanks to Marcus. As I stagger past the front door, it opens and men in white uniforms start pouring in.
Blanks.
They’ve come for me!
This was their plan all along.
They’re taking me back tonight!
NO!
I sprint up the stairs, all the way to the top, and I barge into Shade’s room to beg him for another chance.
But he’s not there.
‘Are you coming back to bed, baby?’ The blanket on his bed moves and a head pokes out. ‘Oh! This is awkward.’
Laurie sits up and grips the sheet to her naked chest.
‘You know, you shouldn’t just barge into your brother’s room,’ she says in one of the most patronizing tones I’ve ever heard. ‘It’s kinda weird. Families should have boundaries, you know? There’s going to be some new rules around here, kid killer.’ Laurie smirks. ‘Even if he did tell everyone downstairs earlier that you’re too stupid to learn them.’
I back away, not grasping what’s happening, and yet understanding completely. Of course they’re together. Of course they are.
Nothing was how I thought it was.
I smack into something hard and I shriek as I turn, fearing the worst.
It’s Shade, but I don’t feel better. I feel worse.
‘Daisy? What’s wrong? Are you?—’
I flee back down the stairs, taking the steps two at a time as fast as I can .
I bolt out the front door into the cold, and my bare feet are stabbed by the gravel.
I let the pain ground me, and then I ignore it as I run as fast as I can away from Shade, the boy I cared about when we were kids. But he doesn’t exist anymore. He probably never did. He’s just a cruel man, like all the others here.
Everything’s all twisted and gnarled. A giant knot I can’t possibly unpick. Warped and bent. Impossible to align.
Tears blur my vision as I stumble off the driveway and into the woods. I thought I could build a life for myself.
I fall to my knees in the wet leaves and curl into myself, sobbing quietly in the dark.
I hear shouts coming from the house and powerful flashlights shine beams through the trees.
I get up and make my way to the road while they’re still far off, and then I walk away.
I don’t know where I’m going to go, but it’s going to be far away from here.
I’m not going to let them take me back.
Never.
I hope you’ve enjoyed the first part of Daisy’s story. Degradation, book 2 in Den of Deception, will be coming out in early 2025.