Chapter 10
Brittany – Five Months Later
I hum as I lick the chocolate ice cream off my spoon, the rerun of some old show I don’t even know what it's called playing on the TV, though it is funny.
I’ve been on my feet all day at the shop, Annie’s newest employee, a high school student, learning from me of all people. Sitting down eating ice cream seems perfect, especially when I’ve been craving it all day.
I giggle at the TV as a character gets hit in the head with a frying pan before taking another spoonful of ice cream, humming to myself when a sharp twinge hits my stomach, and I gasp as a sharp pain throbs in my head.
“I’m so proud of you my darling girl…”
The woman’s whispered words echo in my head, but I don’t see a face as another sharp twitch hits my stomach again, and I quickly sit forward as I cup my bump and take slow, deep breaths.
“Okay, baby girl,” I breathe, “you just trying to get comfy?”
I swallow hard when another pain hits, and without thinking, I grab the prepaid phone Melanie helped me get and pull up her number and put my phone on speaker.
She answers after three rings, giggling, “Travis, stop,” then says, “Hello?”
I instantly feel bad for interrupting them and I consider hanging up but my daughter has other ideas by the looks of things.
“Melanie,” I gasp just as another pain hits, and I know my heart rate is picking up. I know I’m beginning to panic because Meghan spoke all about Braxton hicks contractions, but she never said they were going to be really close together.
“Bell, what’s wrong?!” she demands more alertly, and I hear her husband question, “Mel?”
“I-I think I may be in labor. I’m getting sharp pains,” I admit, the woman’s voice I heard still echoing, making my head throb.
“Are you sure it isn’t Braxton hicks?” she asks as rustling comes through the phone line, and I swallow hard.
“I-I don’t know I –” I cut my own words off as I look down at the sensation like I just peed myself, and I clear my throat and stutter, “Uh, nope, no, not Braxton hicks, I think my water just broke, either that or I peed myself and I really hope I did not just pee myself because that would be embarrassing.”
“Crap, Travis, call your dad to watch the kids, Bell’s in labor,” She says ignoring my nervous rambling, and I hear a lot of cursing as another sharp pain throbs down below, and I cry out.
“Bell, listen to me, just breathe for me, okay, deep breaths, do it with me,” she instructs, and I try to take deep breaths, but the pain intensifies as Dagger says loudly, “Precious, I spoke to Slicer, he’ll be at the apartment block in five with Meghan.”
“Oh, thank god,” Mel murmurs, and I cry out again before the urge to push consumes me.
Oh no.
“M-Mel, I-I need to push,” I stutter as I grip the couch and lower myself to sit on the floor, my legs shaking, and she demands, “Don’t you dare, wait for Meghan, I’m on my way.”
“I-I may have lost my memory, Mel, but even I know I can’t just close my legs,” I choke as another contraction hits me.
I slowly lie on the floor, before grabbing the cushion off the couch and laying it behind my head, and I cry out again, my stomach tightening, down below aching.
“I-I need to push,” I cry, and Mel shouts, “Don’t you dare, we’re nearly there,” just as my front door slams open and a frazzled-looking Meghan rushes in with a medical bag, her husband Slicer right behind her.
“Oh, thank god,” I sob and pass the phone to Meghan, who quickly says, “Mel, I’m here, but I’m going to need your assistance.”
“I’m two seconds out,” Mel replies before the phone goes dead, and Meghan smiles at me and asks, “You ready to have this baby?”
“No,” I admit, “I’m four weeks early and not in a hospital!”
Meghan chuckles, “Well, that sounds about right for a woman with amnesia.”
“I-I had a flashback,” I admit as I take deep breaths, trying to distract myself from my predicament while Meghan places towels underneath me, Slicer bringing out a bowl of hot water.
Wait, what’s the hot water for?
“What did you see?” Meghan asks as she helps remove my underwear after placing a towel over my bent legs, leaving me in only the white buttoned-down shirt I was wearing when I was attacked.
It brings me peace. As soon as I was given it by Mel, I felt the need to wear it all the time. The doctor mentioned that it was a good sign. It seemed that subconsciously, I knew this shirt meant something to me, even though it was apparently a man’s shirt.
“I didn’t-didn’t see anything, but I heard a woman’s voice, she said she was proud of me, and then I went into labor,” I admit, and Meghan nods.
“That is good, Bell, it’s a good sign,” she confirms, and I cry out again as another contraction hits and I sob, “I need to push!” Just as my door opens again and Mel shouts, “I’m here, I’m here, you can push now!” as she rushes in with Dagger right behind her, shaking his head at his woman.
Meghan chuckles as the men stand in the kitchen, giving me some privacy, which I am really grateful for. Mel kneels beside me, grabbing my thigh, lifting it as another contraction hits, and my whole body tightens, the pain too much.
“I cannot believe our daughter has graduated from college. Where has the time gone, Bobby?”
Dizziness hits, and I groan, the woman’s voice echoing again, the name Bobby not doing anything, not bringing any memories back, and as the contraction subsides, I choke, “I graduated college.”
“Fuck is she getting her memories back?” Dagger asks, and I breathe deeply, admitting, “I didn’t see any faces, only hearing a woman’s voice, she was talking to someone called Bobby.”
“It would seem the labor pain is helping her to remember snippets,” Mel says just as another contraction hits
“Okay, Bell, push, honey,” Meghan says fiercely as she bends between my legs, gloves on, and I sob as I press my chin to my chest and squeezing Mel’s hand, I listen, pushing. I am hoping I don’t poop myself because apparently, that is possible during labor.
Another dizzy spell hits.
“A veterinary nurse, my daughter.”
The woman’s gushes echo like she’s standing before me, and the contraction subsides, and I breathe heavily as I lean back, and Mel wipes the sweat off my forehead.
“Veterinary nurse, Axel was r-right, I’m a veterinary nurse.” I croak.
“Still no visual?” Slicer confirms, and I shake my head but wince instantly regretting it as a sharp pain stabs behind my eyes.
“Just a woman’s voice, my mama’s, I think,” I admit before groaning as another contraction hits and I follow my body’s needs and push.
“That’s it, Bell, the head's out, keep pushing,” Meghan encourages, and after what feels like hours but was probably only minutes, my body tired, I hear the cries of a baby. I sob as I lean into Mel, the pressure down below finally gone, the pain subsiding for a moment.
“Baby, I need your help for a moment,” Meghan says, and Slicer quickly rushes over and takes my crying daughter after Meg cuts the cord, wrapping her in a towel, and Meg looks at me and says, “Okay, push the placenta out, Bell.”
I nod and bear down again, the strangest of sensations hitting me as I pass the placenta, I mean, it’s like taking a crap but out of the wrong hole.
“Okay, done,” Meghan says, and I fall back a little breathing heavy as Mel quickly takes the placenta in the towels while Meghan cleans me up, and Slicer bends down and gently lays my daughter on my chest, and I sob, “She’s so perfect,” as I gently lay my hand on her head taking in her features and he squeezes my arm in support.
An hour later, I smile softly as I stare at my sleeping little girl nestled in my arms, and sadness fills me.
All the books I read said that when I give birth, my daughter's eyes would be blue, but hers aren’t. No, they are dark brown, like chocolate.
I guess it’s just a myth baby’s being born with blue eyes.
My eyes, they’re a weird blue kind of color, sapphire I think Mel called them, and my daughter has chocolate, like her father's. A man I don’t even know, don’t even remember.
Mel and Meg left ten minutes ago after ensuring I was alright. I mentioned I wanted to be alone with Bailey, and they understood and will apparently be back later.
The woman’s voice is clear in my head, yet nothing is coming back to me, and I feel like I’ve failed my daughter for not remembering my past before she was born, her family, her heritage.
My tears blur, and gently I move side to side with Bailey nestled in my arms, and I sob, loneliness and confusion filling me along with deep fear.
Fear I’ll never remember.
Fear my daughter will only have me.