Chapter 18 Lizzie
LIZZIE
A FEW DAYS LATER
I woke up in my bed alone.
That was a few days ago now, and I was still thinking about it.
Still turning it over. I had rolled over expecting to thud right into the man who made me feel like I was worth a hill of beans to someone other than the military, and instead there was nothing but a cold spot where he had been.
That was the moment the doubt started. That was the moment I started wondering if I had read the whole thing wrong.
A cold side of the bed made me go in search of Brutus, wondering where Doc was. But all he did was mumble something about an assignment, and that was that.
Everything was just supposed to be… okay.
Days passed, and I still didn’t see Doc much. He didn’t come by to play video games or chat. He didn’t come by to check on me. I had to schedule a fucking appointment with him just to see him. Which was overdue anyway according to him when he peeled some of my gauze back to reveal healed stitching.
My muscles twitched involuntarily as he removed them, one by one.
Whiplash. It felt like emotional whiplash. Did I do something wrong? I mean, sure, assignments. Yeah, got it. But for days? After a lovely date and lovely moments spent together, and then I just go… days without seeing him?
It felt like he was avoiding me.
I avoided his gaze by staring off at the wall while he gave me his commands.
“Hunch over a bit more, Miss Elizabeth.”
I leaned forward a bit before I felt him snag a stitch and pluck it out. “Got it.”
I just slowly nodded as I continued staring at the wall.
“Your bruises look much better,” Doc said as he snapped off his rubber gloves and rolled away from me on his little stool.
“And I think we can get rid of the support bandages on your left ankle. There’s no swelling.
The bruising is fading. You didn’t have any issues with any of the movement tests. I’m proud of you, Miss Elizabeth.”
I didn’t feel proud.
I felt… empty.
“Miss Elizabeth?”
“Hmm?” I hummed as I snapped my head toward him.
He studied me over the rim of those glasses of his. “Did you hear me, Miss Elizabeth?”
I blinked once and cleared my throat. “Sorry, I was in my head. What did you say, Doc?”
“I said,” he said as he rolled over and took my hands within his like it was the most normal thing in the world, “your bruises are healing well. We won’t have to wrap your ankle for support any longer, either. Unless you want to continue to wrap it.”
“Yeah? You think so?”
A slow smile crept across his face. “I know so. But if you still want it wrapped, I can get it wrapped back up for you.”
The instant he smiled at me, all sunshine and fresh air in that pearly white smile, all of my worries melted away. Maybe I was being too hard on him. The crew kept me safe. He kept me safe. And healthy. And warm. And comfortable. And fed.
“So I’m healing well?” I said, trying to pull out of my hazy mind.
“Yes,” he said with a bright smile as he released my hands and rolled away again on his little stool. “And that’s all thanks to your diligence with listening to me and keeping up with your medication.”
I grinned. “You just like it when I listen.”
He chuckled as he swiveled around, gazing at me from across the room. “Miss Elizabeth?”
I giggled softly. “You know, one of these days, you can just call me ‘Lizzie’.”
His smile brightened. “Have dinner with me by the pool again tonight.”
I paused. My brain forced my lips to speak before I could catch the question. “So you haven’t been avoiding me lately?”
His brow pinched together. “Why would I do that?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know. It’s just…”
I turned my head back to the side, staring at the wall again. I shouldn’t have fucking opened my mouth. I should have bit down onto my tongue—
My feet were picked up and placed into his lap before I looked down and realized he wheeled back to me. His hands picked up my foot that wasn’t damaged and massaged it, working the pads of his thumbs into the aching arch of my foot.
“Oh yeah,” I groaned softly as my head tilted back.
“I’m not avoiding you, Miss Elizabeth,” he said as he continued his ministrations. “And I’m sorry if I’ve made you feel that way. Sometimes I don’t understand how my actions register with others.”
I found myself lying back on the patient exam table. “I can’t blame you, with all the rushing around your brain must do with everything that you read and experience.”
“Will you tell me about it?” he asked as he moved to the heel of my foot and began applying some sort of a cream to it. “What I’ve done? How it made you feel? I’d like to know, for future reference.”
For future reference.
Did he think about a future with me?
I swallowed the thought down and cleared my throat. “When I woke up that next morning to you not being in the bed after falling asleep with you, it made me feel…”
“Lonely?” he asked, his voice uncharacteristically soft.
I nodded softly, allowing my eyes to open so that I was staring up at the ceiling. “Yeah. Something like that. I thought, maybe, we just hooked up or something and I didn’t catch onto the cues, or whatever.”
His hand paused before it placed my foot back down into his lap. I felt him stand before I saw him hovering over me, my legs swung up onto the exam table just so he could hover over me.
He had such a studious look on his face. “I’m sorry I made you feel that way, Miss Elizabeth. Brutus needed me for something, and I figured it was a church meeting before I realized he just didn’t want to cook breakfast for everyone that morning.”
I thought about my encounter with Brutus. How he said something about Doc being on a mission.
So he wasn’t with the crew?
“You… left to cook breakfast?” I asked.
He nodded, the look on his face so serious. “Anna was in the kitchen with pickles again. He didn’t want to go inside.”
I couldn’t help but burst out with laughter. More with relief than anything else. “My God, that man hates him some fucking pickles.”
“Does that mean you will still have dinner with me, Miss Elizabeth?”
He reached out and tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear as I laid there on his exam table.
The words came as effortlessly as the happiness that I felt around him.
“I’d love to, Doc. I look forward to it.”