Chapter 12
I dropped Raven off at the restaurant, watching her walk away without even looking back. Her makeup was running down her face and her hair was soaked; her black dress clinging to her body. Even in that state, she’s the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.
Still.
The fire in her heart isn’t out. That’s something. How does she not see that nobody feels the way I do about her? She was the one who saved me. Gave my life purpose. Redirected my darkness. In ways she doesn’t even know about. In ways I haven’t been able to share with her yet. The plans I have…
She has no idea how we got here, and clearly, I’m doing a piss-poor job of explaining it the right way. She says stuff and I react. That’s how I’ve always been, especially with her, but I need to somehow find a way to control that.
I don’t want to rehash our past. I don’t want a do-over. I want a fresh start.
Everything between us was four years ago, and we were different people living different lives who came together at the wrong time.
The only thing that hasn’t changed is the way I feel about her.
My car hits I-95 North and I take off, needing to clear my head with a fast ride, not even giving a shit that I’m still soaked as I weave in and out of cars.
I could go out and see Landon. I could go and find my other brothers, Oliver, Carter, or even Kaplan since Kap is the only single bastard left of us.
Not even our baby sister Rina is single anymore and I would have sworn to Jesus she was in it to win the single life.
But that hasn’t been me despite what the tabloids still love to print.
I worked my ass off in college and medical school and then in my residency because I had a goal. I hadn’t been jilted in love or sworn off relationships. I just didn’t have time and screwing around without strings fit my lifestyle better.
Until one night.
One night when my life was falling apart around me, and I saw her .
After that, there was no going back and there isn’t now. I have to remind myself of that. I ruined her. In the worst possible way. I did that, knowing the potential outcome.
I let my bird fly.
Now it’s time to catch her again.
My car purrs, racing along highways and between cars until I grow bored and end up somehow at Rina’s. A spot outside her door in Beacon Hill feels like an invitation and I park only to knock on her door seconds later.
Her boyfriend, Brecken, answers, his eyes all over me before he steps back and waves me in.
He gets it. He met Rina in a bar, and they had a night.
Then four years later, they met again, and he had to fight heaven and hell to win my sister, who stopped believing in love when love showed her its violent, ugly side.
Over a year together now and here they are.
“They’re early! I haven’t finished getting everything ready yet.
” Rina comes flying down the stairs, her blond hair dancing behind her.
She stops short when she spots me, surprise flittering across her features.
“Hey,” she says, her gaze catching on Brecken before bouncing back to me.
She takes me in for a minute and then without me even having to say a word, she finds my arm and drags me into a hug. “Ewwww, you’re soaking wet. Gross.”
“Sorry. I ended up fighting with a raven-haired beauty in the rain.”
“We’re going tomorrow,” Brecken announces once Rina lets me go. He ushers me into the kitchen. “For the Sunday Matinee. How was the show?”
“She’s brilliant.”
“And the rest of the performers?”
“Didn’t hear them.”
Rina grins but hides it in her wineglass. “Uh-huh. And what brings you here now?”
“A change of clothes, naturally.”
Brecken groans, his head falling back. “Fine, I’ll go grab you something dry to wear. But it won’t be my best digs.”
Brecken runs off, taking the stairs two at a time and I turn back to Rina, who is studying me carefully. “What? Don’t look at me like that. I like her, okay?”
She snorts. “Like her? Yeah. You like her all right. But you need to stop stalking her.”
I tilt my head. “Different and you know it.”
Rina takes a sip of her wine, holding her glass up in the air as she considers this. “Only because you’re my brother do I know it.”
“Really? That’s the only reason you know I’d never physically hurt her?”
She stares into her glass. Blows out a breath. “No. I know you’re not that guy. Sorry. She’s my friend and I keep her secrets close, but it’s no secret she was hoping to avoid this with you.”
“Sucks to be her then. She should just give in now and save both of us the fighting and drama.”
“Here. Go change.” Brecken tosses me some clothes and I head into the powder room, grateful to be getting out of my suit that’s not only ruined but has been sticking to my ass for the last couple hours.
I put on the pair of jeans and the dark-green Henley he gave me, grateful that Breck is about the same size as me.
When I exit, I find them holding each other, Rina smiling up at him as they stare deeply into each other’s eyes. A spasm twists up my chest. Both the good and the bad kind. “Can I be best man at your wedding?”
Brecken exhales, stepping back and dropping his elbows on the stone counter. “Um. No. That would be Wes and that’s nonnegotiable even if I am marrying into a family of brothers.”
“We’re not getting married. We haven’t even been living together a year.”
“I’m giving you a month, Rina. Then it’s Vegas or here or anywhere, but my ring will be on your finger.” He twists back to me. “So yeah, you can’t be best man, but you can be a groomsman and shit. I’ll need someone to write the prescription for the sedatives I’ll be forced to give her.”
“You’re not drugging me, asshole.”
“Fuck,” he hisses, the color draining from his face.
Running his hand through his hair, he grabs her, dragging her into his chest, holding her as tight as he can. Rina was drugged once. By an ex who did unspeakable things to her after he kidnapped her.
“You know that’s not what I meant,” he whispers into her, his lips planted in her hair. “I just want to marry you and you won’t marry me unless I take drastic measures. That’s all.”
She growls but kisses his chest before going back to her wine.
“He’s right,” I tell her. “You know we would have killed him six ways to Sunday by now if we thought he wasn’t perfect for you. You should just pussy up and marry him.”
“Pussy up?” she chokes on her sip of wine, her eyebrows at her hairline.
“Vagina up? Pull up your big girl panties? I don’t know how it works for women and telling you to grow some balls doesn’t quite fit.
However, talking about that part of your anatomy is making me nauseous.
But truly, marry the guy already. Put him and the rest of us—who have to continually hear about him wanting to marry you—out of our misery. ”
This time I get a huff and an eye roll from her.
“Enough. I’m waiting on the girls to come over and if I don’t drink this glass now before the pregnant trio otherwise known as Halle, Grace, and Aria get here, they’ll take the bottle from me and club me to death with it since they can’t have any.
Margot and Amelia are my only saving grace with this, and Amelia made the awful suggestion of us not drinking since the others can’t.
Incidentally, I had also invited Elle, but she and Landon have both Stella and Layla tonight, and Raven, but she said she had other plans. ” A pointed eyebrow flies my way.
“I heard Raven talking to her dicklicker, the way too touchy-feely conductor about some sort of reception tonight. Twat’s lucky I didn’t break his hands. It’d be sad to see his career end that way.”
“No kidding. But for real, you men need to leave. The pregnancy invasion will be here any minute and I need to get my drink on first.” She polishes off her glass and pours herself another.
Grace is pregnant with my middle brother Carter’s kid.
They work together as OB-GYNs and she’s also best friends with my baby brother Oliver, who is fake engaged to Amelia, though he’s itching to make it the real deal.
Layla is Amelia’s little sister, and she lives with Amelia and Oliver.
Trying to keep it all straight is a fucking migraine if ever there was one.
Halle, Aria, and Margot are Rina’s friends, but have now been taken into the family fold since Margot works with Grace, and all the women are great friends. Evidently, they’re trying to indoctrinate Raven now that she’s back in town.
I flip my baby sister off before standing up, rounding the island, and kissing her head. Then I turn to her man. “You interested in getting a drink? I don’t want to go home yet.”
“I was planning to anyway. Carter, Oliver, Drew, Jonah, and Wes are meeting me at the bar around the corner.” Drew, Jonah, and Wes are the husbands and fiancés of Margot, Halle, and Aria respectively.
“What? And I wasn’t invited or is this like some sort of significant other bondingfest? Landon, I already knew, was home with the tweens and his ladylove. But where’s baby face killer tonight?”
“You were going to the symphony tonight as I recall,” Brecken states. “And no, to answer your question, toddler-faced Kaplan isn’t coming.”
“He doesn’t look that young.”
Brecken and I stare incredulously at Rina.
“Baby, he does,” Brecken counters as he grabs his coat from the closet by the front door, throwing it on. Mine is so wet, I don’t think it’ll ever dry. “You’d think if your face looked like you were twenty-five instead of thirty-five, you’d grow a beard or something.”
“And hide that chiseled-from-stone jawline? Pfft. Have you met, Kap? But still, I’m hurt. The symphony ended like two hours ago. Now you’re going out with my brothers and friends?”
“Don’t be such a little bitch. You’re here now, so balance in the force is restored.”