Chapter 13
A ntonio’s breath smells like he swallowed a dumpster for dinner only to chase it down with a vat of stale beer.
It’s all I can do to keep smiling and not throw up all over his stupidly expensive Italian leather shoes.
It’s a good thing I’ve been pounding tequila like she’s my best friend and totally gets me.
After the night I’ve already had, I think she damn well does!
First, there was the Luca incident. That alone is like a tsunami of feels that would lead anyone to hitting the bottle. Then I got to the restaurant, went to the bathroom, and turned on the hand dryer in there, pulling my dress right up against it since I was soaked.
Did you know that polyester is fucking flammable?
Yeah, my dress actually started smoking and had a few sparks that burned holes into it. I managed to wash my face, finger brush my hair, and make it out of the bathroom to have dinner with my dad, Dr., and Mrs. Fritz, all the while ignoring their questioning, troubled glances.
And just when I was finally drying my drowned rat body out, my Uber pulled up, hitting a massive puddle, and dousing me in muddy, disgusting, street rainwater.
I found myself at Catarina’s and threw myself on her mercy.
That’s how I ended up walking into this bar looking like a version between a Vegas showgirl and a call girl.
And before you go asking, yes, there is a difference between the two.
I’m freaking glitz and glam and over-the-top sex.
Hence the tequila.
And me trying to ignore Antonio’s slightly too friendly hands. And that breath!
“That’s when I told the Queen that she may run England, but I run how the symphony is conducted.”
I laugh, only because not only is he lying through his overly whitened teeth—he’s never met or had a conversation with the Queen before—but how is he not aware that the Queen of England doesn’t actually run the country?
“Right.” I need another drink.
“Would you like to go somewhere else? You look a little bored with the crowd.”
No. Just bored with you. “I’m not ready to leave yet. I think I’ll go grab another quick drink and use the ladies’ room.”
“Oh. Would you like me to join you?”
That’s where I pause, staring up into his mocha Frappuccino eyes. I nearly ask him which one he’s referring to, the drink or the bathroom, but decide a resolute, “No, thanks,” is easier to manage.
His hand has been hovering on the spot above my ass all night and no matter how much wiggling or attempting to go off and find other people to talk to, I haven’t been successful in shaking him.
He’s followed me all three times I’ve done that.
It’s creepy and annoying and if it were any other guy, he’d be nursing sore junk and possibly a broken nose by this point.
But I can’t exactly tell Antonio to fuck off.
A pity, but welcome to being a woman, right?
We get harassed and since I don’t want to lose my brand-new job or make a huge stink that will end up with me getting fired—the board loves him and calls him Maestro—I’ve been pounding shots and grimace-smiling through it.
“Are you sure, mia bella? I am happy to keep you company.”
“When she’s peeing?” Quill smarts and thank God… Quill. “I don’t think so, Antonio. Let the girl go use the ladies’ room in peace.”
“Besides,” Catarina chimes in, coming in on my other side. “Viktor Popov just arrived and is looking for you.”
I have no idea who Viktor Popov is, but whoever he is, Antonio’s entire put out disposition drastically changes as does his posture. He rights his spine and immediately tells me, “I’ll find you after, Raven,” before scurrying off.
I sag, my relief a pulse through my body. “Thank you. Thank you both. Wet cat food mixed with dog shit is more palatable than his breath.”
Quill snorts. “He smokes like a chimney and alternates between espresso and sweet wine. Bad breath is inevitable with that.”
“Bad breath is putting a kind spin on what he had going on.”
“Better you than me. But I’d run while you can. He has a thing for hot, fresh meat and you fit into both categories.”
“So I’ve gathered. One more shot. One pee break. Then I’m taking an Uber home and sleeping until I can’t anymore.”
“Alone?” Quill jabs, though the sparkle in her eyes tells me she’s clearly fishing. Someone obviously hasn’t let the flower incident go.
“Alone. But that was a nice try.” I’m not looking for strings or insanity or mess. Having experienced enough of the latter and knowing Antonio is all three, I’m all set.
“But you haven’t seen the insanely hot crew of men at the bar,” she emphasizes. “Come on. Let’s go hit on them and see if we can get you laid tonight.”
My eyebrows scrunch, already doubting her.
“I thought we rented out the place.” I glance over her shoulder but only see the back of their heads.
Truth, I don’t even know why I’m bothering to look.
I’m not interested in a hookup, even if that might just be the ticket to a little mental sanity.
Men who are looking to play with my heart and toy with my emotions? Not so much.
Ugh! I try. I try so hard not to put Luca’s face or his words into everything with every other guy, but they always seem to find their way there. I never should have come back.
“Go out there and have your shot. I mean it. You’ll thank us later. If we weren’t with a woman and a man already, you’d have wingwomen.” Catarina winks at me and I nearly roll my eyes, but still manage to smile gratefully.
These two have had my back since my first day here.
I wasn’t able to think about another guy for a solid two years after I left Martha’s Vineyard.
I threw myself into my music. Into all the music I could learn.
And then once the stage fright started and it became more than I was able to handle, I decided to turn the psych classes I’d taken at a local university into a second degree.
It wasn’t until I hooked up with my professor in one of those psych classes that things started turning around for me.
I turned my heartache—the crippling betrayal that had been sitting in my gut like a poisonous weight—into hatred and bitterness.
He was also the least available man on the planet—married into a polyamorous relationship.
He wanted sex and I wanted to forget. Worked perfectly while it lasted.
After him, I had a few one-night stands, seeking more fun and escape.
But it was never all that it was cracked up to be. None of it was. How do you go from having amazing, mind-blowing, dirty sex with a man you love and trust to random, awkward, and kinda boring sex with a stranger?
I didn’t date anyone. Not seriously anyway. Luca Fritz had ruined me in so many ways.
For all four years, I was in London and then again on the plane ride home, I swore to myself I was done with him. That my life should be about pleasure. Fun. Experience. Not the man who gave me all those things only to rip them away from me.
That was my promise, especially when Luca’s face is splashed all over every tabloid in the world—even in England—with a different woman on his arm each and every time.
Bastard had no trouble moving on despite the bullshit he tried to spin with me tonight.
I kiss Quill’s cheek and then Catarina’s. “I’m going to have this dress cleaned and then return it to you.”
Catarina frowns. “I told you to keep it. Molly hates it when I wear stuff like this now.”
I shake my head. “This dress is so not me. But thank you for letting me borrow it. And for grabbing my purse and coat from the back room for me. I’ll see you tomorrow morning for the show.
” We have a Sunday matinee that I’m seriously not looking forward to.
But one more shot will put me snuggly to sleep once I get my ass all the way back out to the compound.
I need to move. I need to move closer to the city. I don’t have a car and I can’t exactly afford one either. As much as I thrive on being close to my father and Octavia, I can still go see them often, even if I’m living in the city.
On higher than high sparkly heels, I sneak out of the back room and out to the main bar.
I head quickly for the bathroom, do my thing, and then as I’m leaving, order my Uber to take me home—for almost forty dollars, I might add.
Yeah, I definitely need a place in the city.
Not even two steps out of the bathroom and I’m shoved back inside it with enough force to rip a startled gasp from my lungs and cause my heart to explode in my chest. The door slams shut, locking with a resounding click before I can even comprehend how it happened.
“What the—” I stagger back another step. Locking onto a pair of fathomless green eyes. “Are you following me?”
Luca gives an impatient grunt. “You’re around the corner from Rina’s. This is our usual bar.”
Of course it is. Why would I be in any other bar in this city? The universe is a total bitch like that and clearly has it out for me. I swear off one man for the rest of my life and he’s thrown in my path twice in one night.
“We need to talk,” he says urgently. “Can we go somewhere and do that? I have things I need to tell you.”
“I don’t want to talk anymore and I’m not in the mood to fight either. Just go and leave me alone. I need to get back out there.”
I shift and Luca follows my movements, his expression telling me I’m not getting away that easily now that he’s got me where he wants me.
He takes a hard step forward, his eyes loaded with darkness.
With desire. With rage. That last one seems to creep back up, eclipsing the other two, almost as an afterthought and a remembrance of why he stalked me in here in the first place.
“You feel this too. I know you do. You can’t hide from that. What the hell were you doing letting that man touch you?”
“Watching me, were you?” I taunt, tilting my head and smirking because no one ever said I don’t know how to be a bitch when provoked.
“Answer me, Raven.”