Chapter 30
“I t’s a Monday night,” I object when Catarina enters my apartment holding a bottle of tequila and a bottle of margarita mix—the kind that already has alcohol in it.
“Right. Monday. Margarita Monday.”
“That’s a thing?” I ask Quill, who is right behind her, carrying… more tequila. Oh boy.
She shrugs. “I have no idea. I was just told to bring tequila, so I did. You better have Mexican food and a lot of guacamole. Otherwise, all this tequila will burn an ulcer into my stomach.”
“Boo,” Catarina hisses out from the kitchen. “We’re young and hot and not boring. Woo-hoo, Margarita Monday.”
“Is she already drunk?” I whisper to Quill as I shut and lock the door.
“I don’t see how since we Ubered here together after rehearsal. I’m still pissed it ran as late as it did. I’m starving.”
“I’m not drunk. I’m having a girls’ night. So put on the music, mix up the drinks, and let’s eat.”
I head into the kitchen, unloading the takeout that arrived moments before they did.
Pulling out a few glasses, I get started on the drinks, while Quill and Catarina attack the food. “My girlfriend called me old,” Catarina says as she starts dishing herself up a plate.
I freeze midpour and turn to look at her, a frown on my face. “When? And how old is she?”
“She’s twenty-five. Three years younger than me.”
My eyebrows crease, as do Quill’s. “I’m not understanding,” she admits.
“I play classical music for a living and no longer wear slutty club dresses. I don’t know.
” She shrugs up a shoulder as I finish making her drink—extra strong because clearly she needs it—and hand it to her.
“I just figured by being with someone, living with them, I could just be myself and they’d love and accept that.
I hated having to go to clubs to pick up women.
I hated first and second and even third dates because I always felt like I had to be the best version of myself to get to a fourth date and for them to like me. ”
“Doesn’t everyone feel like that? Isn’t that why people hate dating?” Quill asks and I nod in agreement because yeah, dating sucks.
“Precisely. I think Talia just wants us to be more fun. We stay in a lot.”
“You could have brought her here tonight,” I throw out. “Had a girls’ night like that. I could have invited a few of my friends too.”
She shakes her head. “No. I wanted this to be just us. Maybe another night, though we’ll all go out. You’ll bring your friends and we’ll be young and wild.”
Both Quill and I scrunch up our noses at that, and Catarina laughs, cocking an eyebrow at me. “Quill I get. She’s a married woman, but you’re like twenty-two. How are you not out doing all those things?”
I make myself a plate of enchiladas and quesadillas and beans and rice and then head over to my round dining table that’s between the kitchen and the living room.
“I like to think of myself as an old soul.” Now I’m getting dubious eyebrows from both of them.
“I don’t know. In London, I was either heartbroken or it was all work with very few breaks.
I was getting two degrees and had no real desire to meet a guy.
Now I’m back here. All my friends, who are more like family, are all with people. ”
“And you’re back with the guy who broke your heart.” Quill says it like a statement as she sits beside me, taking a sip of her drink.
“I guess. It’s complicated, but it’s also not. Being with him is more natural than I would have ever guessed after what we went through.”
“Which is…”
“More complicated than I feel like getting into while I’m eating.” I take a bite of my food to drive my point home.
“Incidentally, how do you afford this place?” Catarina asks as she stares around my apartment. “I realize that might be a tacky question, but you don’t have a car and I’ve heard you mumble about spending Uber money in the past. So…”
“I, um… I know the owner of the building.”
“Girl, could you be any more cryptic about shit in your life?” Quill teases.
“For real.” Catarina laughs, polishing off her drink and getting up to make another.
“My world is—” I’m cut off when there’s a knock on my door.
“Expecting more company?” Quill quips.
“Um. No.” Wiping my mouth with my napkin, I get up and head for the door. “Who is it?”
“Me. Open up.”
His tone has me unlocking and flinging the door open in the next second. Luca is standing right in my doorway, his hands braced on either side of the frame, his body angled in. But his expression is as despondent as his tone was.
“Hey. You okay? What’s wrong?”
He shakes his head for a moment, his green eyes clinging to my face. “Rough day. I just wanted to see you.”
Without hesitating, I wrap my arms around his waist, tucking my face into the jacket and shirt of his silky tux, breathing him in.
He emits a heavy sigh, his arms encircling my back, holding on tight.
I know Catarina and Quill are likely watching, and though I had been reluctant to share him with anyone, it’s a bit too late for that now.
I thought about him all day. Thought about what we did last night. And I’m not even talking about the dirty stuff. I’m talking about how hard this man made me fall for him again. His complete and utter devotion to me. To us.
“My mom isn’t doing well,” he murmurs against my neck, placing an open mouthed kiss and nuzzling in deeper as if he can’t get close enough. “I’m not sure what’s up with her, but Rina and Grace were there today and said she’s more tired than normal and seems to be eating less.”
I draw back, my chin dropping to his chest so I can look up at him. “Could it be from the chemo?”
“No. She finished that a couple weeks ago, so I doubt it.”
I cup his slightly stubbled jaw in my hand. “Maybe it’s just a cold or something. Is she going to get checked out?”
“I don’t know. I was with my brothers tonight at the charity thing and we planned to go over there tomorrow night. Talk with her more about it.” He licks his lips. “I’m scared,” he confesses.
“I know, baby. I’m sorry.” I squeeze him tighter. “I’m glad you’re going to see her. Would it be all right if I went over tomorrow morning for a visit?”
He chuckles, the humorless sound rumbling into me. “You don’t have to ask to go see my mom. She’s practically your mom too and I think that would be good for her. She might listen to you if you suggest something.”
“Okay. I’ll go in the morning then.”
Without another word, he leans down and kisses me.
His lips are firm, almost demanding, maybe slightly panicked, and I can’t help but feel there is more going on in his head than just his mom.
The way he’s holding me, as if he’s afraid he’ll never get the chance again, makes my heart beat just a touch faster.
Catarina blows out a catcall behind us and I grin into his lips. Luca just kissed me in front of my friends without realizing it.
A point he proves when he glances up past my shoulder and finds Catarina and Quill at the dining table, and his eyes widen in surprise. “Shit. I forgot you were having friends over. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. They didn’t hear us.”
“They saw us kiss.”
I wink at him. “They sure did. Good thing you didn’t cop a feel. Did you eat? Do you want to come in?” I ask when he pulls away, giving his arm a gentle tug. I don’t want him to go. Surprisingly, I want him to meet my friends. “It’s fine. It’s just Margarita Monday and these are my music people.”
He smiles, a touch of dawn hitting the darkness in his eyes. “Margarita Monday, eh? Didn’t know that was a thing, though it sounds fun. But no, I already ate, and I won’t interrupt.”
“We don’t mind,” Catarina yells across the apartment. “She’s told us practically nothing about you. Please, come in and give us all the details. I’m a lesbian, but that kiss was enough to make me bi curious.”
I giggle lightly, turning to glance over my shoulder. “Bi curious?”
Catarina throws her hands up. “He’s hot.”
Quill’s jaw is practically unhinged, and Catarina is now grinning like the cat who ate the canary. “It seems you don’t have a choice now.”
“You’re okay with that? Me coming in and meeting your friends?”
I stare up into his eyes. Him looking at me like this. Showing up here tonight the way he did… “Yes. I’m okay with it.”
“I’m telling them you’re my girlfriend.”
“We heard that!”
I ignore Catarina. “Is that what I am?”
“Fuck yeah, you are.”
He gives me another kiss, this one no less deep or intense.
Part of me feels like I should still hold back.
Keep myself in check. But the rest of me knows it’s too late for that.
I told him I loved him, and I meant it. There is no holding back after that.
It’s only forward with a prayer I don’t get hurt again.
Twisting so his arm is around my shoulders, he shuts the door behind us and then goes to meet my friends.
“Hi. I’m Luca.” He extends his hand, first to Catarina and then to Quill, who still hasn’t managed to pick her jaw up off the table.
“It’s nice to meet you both. You must play with Raven. What instruments?”
“You’re Luca Fritz.” That’s Quill and shit. This is why I didn’t tell them. This is why I hold so much of that side of my life back. That starstruck look. “Luca Abbot-Fritz.”
“You sure about that? I could be Landon.”
A laugh explodes from my chest before I can stop it. I realize people have mistaken them for the other. Hell, the first night Elle met Landon, she thought it was Luca. But if you know them, they’re so insanely different, it feels almost impossible not to notice the difference.
“Landon is seeing someone who is not Raven. He’s also a single dad.”
Luca glances over at me with a bemused expression and then back up at her. “Both of those things are correct. And my brother would be in a lot of trouble if he were seeing Raven. I staked a claim when she was barely legal.”
I pinch into his side, and he drops a kiss on my head.