Chapter 33
“I s this Raven Fairchild?” the woman with an unknown number asks into my phone nearly the second I step outside the hospital.
It’s late. It’s dark. I’m exhausted. My bones weary.
My muscles aching. My mind a funhouse of crazy, both physically and emotionally.
The last thing I want to deal with is spam bullshit.
“It is. Who’s this?”
My voice might come out a bit terser than it would typically, but I’m desperate for a shower and six hours of sleep before I have to return to the hospital.
I left Luca there. He refused to leave, as did his brothers.
Octavia slept most of the time we were there, waking very briefly and only sipping on some ice water.
She wasn’t pleased we were all there standing vigil.
She told us to go. That she was fine.
That’s when Grace and I climbed in her bed beside her and told her we weren’t going anywhere just yet, so she better get used to it.
I only left once she fell back to sleep and Luca was passed out on a pull-out sofa, snoring beside Landon.
But if I’m going to pull together a Thanksgiving feast, I need real sleep in a real bed first.
“I apologize for calling at this hour the night before Thanksgiving. I realize our timing is impossible. My name is Maia Dawson. I’m the personal assistant for the band Wild Minds. We spoke about a month or so ago.”
Holy shit! “Yes,” flees my lungs. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t recognize the number.”
She laughs. “That’s how we like it, right?” Another laugh. “I hate to press this upon you without much notice, but the guys have an unexpected break in their schedule and can be in Boston to record next Thursday. I realize the timing might not be the best, but does this work at all for you?”
“Yes. Absolutely. I can do Thursday. My first holiday Pops performance is that Friday night, though.”
“Not a problem. The guys and their producer, Eden, feel they should be able to lay down your part of the song in one day, but if we run over, we can always work around your schedule. We are very excited to work with you and are willing to do whatever it takes to make this easier for you, given the rush bomb we just dropped.”
“Maia—I hope I can call you Maia—I’m just floored they want me. Thursday should be perfect for me.”
Her giggle mixed with a hint of twang hits all my senses. “You can call me Maia, Raven. Kaplan has gone on and on about you and we’ve also heard your playing. You’re incredible and we’re so grateful you’ve agreed to record with us.”
“Thank you!” I might have just peed my pants. A little. Not a lot. But WILD MINDS! “You had mentioned that they’d send over the song for me to familiarize myself with. Is that still a possibility?”
“Yes. Hold on a moment.” I hear some noise and then, “Keith?”
“Yeah, Pandora?” comes through the phone in the background. Pandora?
“I’m on the phone with Raven Fairchild. Do you have anything of the song you want her to record on?”
“I think so. If I don’t, Jas definitely will.”
“Email it to me, would ya?”
He grumbles something I can’t hear and then she’s back on the phone. “We should have it for you by tomorrow or first thing Friday as well as further details about where and what time we’re recording.”
“Perfect. That’s perfect. Thank you.”
“Wonderful. We can’t wait. We’ll see you next Thursday.”
And with that, Maia Dawson, wife of Keith Dawson, drummer for the band Wild Minds, disconnects the call.
I scream. I mean, hell yeah, I do. I don’t even care.
I’m smiling when I don’t feel as though smiles should be something I rock right now.
I want to race back into the hospital and jump on Luca.
I want to tell Octavia that I’m recording with a world-famous rock band.
I want her to smile the way she smiles at me when she listens to the track.
I want the only woman I have considered a mother for the last fifteen years to be okay!
* * *
A sound wakes me out of a heavy sleep, my mind disoriented, my limbs sluggish. “Hello?”
“Shhh. It’s just me. Go back to sleep.”
“Luca?”
A warm chuckle. “You expecting someone else?”
“Santa told me he was flying in for a pregame warm-up in my bed.”
My blankets shift and then the heat of ten thousand suns moves in beside me. That is until the swat on my ass comes. “Tease.” His hands hit my tits, his arms around my back, and then I’m being dragged into his chest. “Want me to fuck the Santa out of you?”
“I want you to get some sleep. What time is it anyway?”
“Two. I haven’t bunked with Landon since we were twenty-four and Reese died. Doesn’t quite have the same feeling. I couldn’t sleep there. I kept getting up and checking on Mom and her lines and the monitor. I was driving the nurses and my father nuts.”
Shit. The things this family has been through.
“Do you want to get married tomorrow?”
I still in his arms, my eyes snapping open so wide I can see the sun before it even comes close to rising over Boston Harbor. “Luca.” That’s as far as I get.
“I’m sorry. I’m so fucked up right now. I feel like I could lose everything I love at any second. She’s septic. Did I text you that? They think she’s septic and they can’t figure out why. They added on a second antibiotic and her CBC is shit. My mom is really sick, Little Bird.”
I cup his hands over me. “I know.”
“I’m scared.”
“Me too.”
“I couldn’t do this without you. You know my family. My life. My heart.”
“That’s because they’re mine too.”
He blows out a breath into me. One that says my words hit him on a deeper level, but he’s just too damn wrecked to bring its meaning deeper into his mind.
“Sleep, Luca.”
He’s already there before I can even close my eyes.
I wake up to a kiss on my neck, hands kneading my breasts, something hard and thick rocking against me. “Mmmm. What are you doing?”
“What does it feel like?”
“Cuddling,” I tease.
“We are cuddling till I’m inside of you. Then we’re fucking.”
“It feels good. What time is it?”
“Five. Come shower with me.”
Five. That means he only got about three hours of sleep.
Part of me wants to tuck him back under the covers and force him to sleep, but I know him.
His mind is restless. Teeming with toxic energy.
I’ve been wanting to ask him if something is wrong for over a week now, but never quite found it in me.
I don’t even know why. There’s been this mounting unease sitting heavy in my gut because something just feels off to me.
He was distant. Here but not, in his head so much it was like every time he looked at me, something else sprang into his head that called his focus and put a frown on his lips.
It’s why I asked the girls about it yesterday.
I was looking for a little girl talk. A little help and for about the thousandth time since I was seven, I wish my mother were alive.
Whatever has been heavy on his mind, I certainly can’t ask him about it now.
Dragging him out of bed, we slink toward my bathroom, quiet but attached, his chest against my back, his hands moving my hair so he can kiss my neck.
“I’m supposed to work tomorrow,” he murmurs while I go about turning on the faucet to hot and brushing my teeth. I rinse my toothbrush and hand it to him. He smirks, taking it from me. “I should have one of these here. Feels silly considering my place is ten floors up.”
He’s right. “Do you want to go upstairs and get ready?”
“No. I’m going to shower here with you and then I’ll run up and change my clothes.”
“Luca—”
“Shhh. Naked. Shower. Inside you.”
I get a smack on my ass, but if he’s going to talk like a caveman, I’ll treat him like one.
My panties hit the floor, followed by my tank top, and then I’m in the shower while he’s still brushing his teeth.
“Mmmm,” I groan. “So good.” My head falls back into the spray as I bring my hands up through it, arching my back and sticking out my tits.
Not even two seconds later, he’s on me, and I hold in my triumphant smirk. Then I remember nothing about right now feels like a win and this isn’t some hot quickie.
His mouth comes down on mine, kissing me like I’m his only source of air and he’ll die without me. The grip he has on my hair is borderline painful while his raw intensity, his unhinged passion have me pulling him closer.
“Need inside you,” he murmurs into me and before I can formulate a response, he’s lifting me and pressing my back into the tiles.
In one swift move, he thrusts in to the hilt and then holds still.
I gasp out a breath. It’s 5:00 a.m. and I just woke up and while I knew this was coming, damn, I’m full .
He slowly rocks into me, holding me up with one hand under my ass, his other on my breast as his mouth explores mine. But there’s an undercurrent of desperation. I like it as much as it terrifies me. I’ve never been kissed this way. Not even by him.
“Raven,” he murmurs into me, and I open my eyes to find his on the place where our bodies meet, his expression serious, eyebrows creased.
I know his darkness. I’ve seen it. Luca has so much light and passion inside of him.
So much love. It’s why whenever he’s hit by anything that rattles him, threatens him, challenges his heart, it hits him harder.
I also know I’m one of the few he really shows all of it to.
He pushes in. Out. In. Out.
Then he’s back on me, his lips bruising with the force of his kiss.
Slowly, he starts to pick up his pace, understanding how time is not on our side moving him along.
His hard cock throbs inside me and I moan, clinging to him as he sharply thrusts up while rolling his hips.
Stars dot my vision and I squeeze him tighter with my legs, wanting him closer.
“Hold on,” he tells me and unleashes his magnificent cock inside me. Hips pounding. Wet skin slapping. Moans and yeses and cries and pleas. It’s so much. He’s chasing away his fear and anguish inside me and I let him, matching him, showing him I can take anything he’s got to give.
His pounding grows harder, more frantic, the back of my head hitting the tile. He doesn’t stop to ask if I’m okay. If I want it gentler, slower, easier, and I’m grateful he doesn’t. Deft fingers find my clit and I shake, feeling my orgasm rise and rise and grow and, “Ah!”
“That’s my good girl,” he purrs, and I lose it on him as if every nerve in my body just caught on fire.
He comes with me, groaning and biting at my flesh, clinging to me.
We ride it out together until all that’s left is the sound of our ragged breathing and the water slapping against the tile floor.
I slide off him, kiss his sternum, and then direct him into the water.
We take turns washing each other’s hair.
Bodies. And then he’s kissing me, telling me he’ll see me later.
But it isn’t until after he’s gone and I’m getting dressed that I realize.
His eyes… he didn’t look into mine once all morning.