18. Lauren
18
LAUREN
Dinner was delicious, but my stomach started rolling as soon as I took my last bite. The hotel restaurant had any type of pasta I could imagine, all of them drizzled in some sort of tomato or cream sauce. And of course, I couldn't resist trying the sampler dish, which I couldn't finish, but I couldn't take the leftovers to the room, either. We'd be too busy to reheat and eat later.
David paid the bill on the hospital's card and offered me his hand. I pressed a hand to my stomach to settle the nausea I was feeling. The persistent symptom of potential pregnancy needled at my conscience, making me feel distracted. I took his hand and stood, but when I burped, I thought I was going to vomit.
"You okay?" he asked as we weaved our way through the dining room toward the hall. We were headed back downstairs to the main floor to the second lecture of the night—Rare Diseases of the Twenty-First Century. I was looking forward to hearing what was happening around the country and the world, but my belly issue threatened to prevent me from being focused.
"Just a little tummy upset. I think I ate too much." I smiled at him and leaned my head on his shoulder. I didn't feel the need to tell him I was now six days late on my period and beginning to wonder what was up. Amber would chide me, tell me to talk to him about my suspicions, but I was still in denial, or at least mostly. After daydreaming the two of us were happily married with a family last night, I'd begun to hope I actually was pregnant.
"I can go get you a glass of wine to take with us. It can settle your stomach." He paused near the host stand as if ready to turn back, but I politely declined.
"No, thank you." As I did, my brain sort of did this stupid thing where I panicked and felt the need to explain. Except, I had no real explanation. "You know, this weekend is supposed to be special and I want to remember it. And if I’m tipsy, how will I take good notes during the sessions?"
David chuckled and looked at me like I was weird, and I realized I could have just declined. A grown adult doesn't have to have an excuse for why they don't want to drink, but I was flustered by the idea that a tiny little life could be growing inside me.
"That's alright. If it gets to be too much, we can go to the room and rest." He patted my hand, now wrapped around the crook of his elbow, and we continued toward the elevator. This time, we weren't alone, and thus, Dr. Bad Boy was forced to keep his hands to himself. My body still tingled, though, remembering how he made me feel before dinner.
The nausea continued into the lecture, and I used peppermints offered on the pillows of the beds at check-in as a means to suppress the worst of it. The sicker I felt, the more I thought of David and what he'd be like as a father. It made me want to get to know his daughter, Lexi, more and see what sort of woman she'd turned out to be. I also thought of asking her what sort of father David was when she was little.
I looked up at him, transfixed by the salt-and-pepper stubble cropping up on his jaw and chin. For forty-two, he was still so young and such a handsome man. He had vigor and passion, and after that stunt in the elevator, I knew he was adventurous too. But I was hesitant to believe someone his age, with a child already graduating high school, would want to start over with a newborn. He had the challenging "parenting years" in his rearview mirror now. Why would he want to start over with me?
But God, did I want children, and the way I was feeling about this man, I wanted them with him. Maybe a boy and a girl, so they didn't grow up alone but always had someone to play with. I was lonely a lot of the time as a child until Jason came along. But then I was the babysitter and helper. We were never close enough in age to hang out, which was why I didn't want to have only one kid.
The speaker said something funny and the entire room cracked up, but I was so mesmerized by the beauty of this man that not only did I not realize the nausea was passing, but I didn’t laugh, either. David looked down at me, still chuckling, and gave me an odd expression.
"Did you hear that?" he asked in a whisper.
I shook my head and felt my cheeks warm. "I was distracted," I told him, but I looked away, embarrassed at being caught checking him out when I should have been focused.
Even when I looked up at the stage where the doctor giving his lecture was writing some statistics on a white board, I still couldn't get my mind off what could be in my near future. For the first time in months, I felt hopeful instead of a sense of dread. Struggles with Jason had gotten me so waylaid, I'd been depressed and stuck in the fear of what would happen if he didn't get clean. This hopeful feeling made me feel so light and giddy.
And when David put his arm around me and rubbed my shoulder with his thumb, I felt tears welling up. Happy tears, sad tears. I was so at home with him, so comfortable, I never wanted to leave his side. I never wanted this to end. He made me so happy, the world could burn down and we'd be roasting marshmallows and totally in love.
I just didn't want to keep doing it in secret. The happy tears outnumbered the sad ones, but they mingled on my cheeks and got his attention, anyway. I was so friggin' emotional like Amber said, and I had no rational reason to be this way. I glanced up at his expression of concern and bolted. My feet carried me as quickly as possible to the conference room exit, and then on to the elevator, but pressing the button a thousand times didn't make it come any faster.
"Hey, what's wrong?" David asked. He had followed me out of the room, probably because I looked like an idiot breaking down in tears and running away.
"Nothing," I mumbled as I dabbed my face with the heel of my right hand.
"Something is wrong. Talk to me." He pulled me in for a hug, and I relented and wrapped my arms around his body.
"It's nothing and it's everything. David, you make me so happy, like ride off into the sunset, happily ever after, throw my whole life away to have you kinda happy."
His firm grip turned my chin upward so I was forced to look him in the eye. "I sense a but…"
"But I don't want to sneak around. I want to have a normal relationship. Being with you here in this conference is amazing. We are normal people with jobs and lives, and we care about each other, and we shouldn't have to hide that. Not for a job or a dumb rule or any reason. I love you."
David didn't respond to my words, but I didn't expect him to blurt out that he loved me too. I knew I was being emotional, and all I really wanted was some sort of hope that we would actually have something real. That if I were really pregnant with his baby, we'd be okay and we'd work it out.
The elevator door dinged and I heard it slide open. Our eyes stayed fixed on each other as he backed me through the open doors into the elevator. He only briefly looked away to press the button for the fourth floor, and the door shut, and then his lips crashed into mine.
The scorching kiss stole the wind from my lungs and made me cry harder. I clung to his wrists as his hands pressed on my cheeks and his mouth covered mine. He was hungry and unrelenting, searching my mouth with his tongue and pulling me against his body until we melded into each other.
When the elevator stopped, he backed away, taking my hand in his, and pulled me up the hallway toward his room. I glanced back in the direction of my room but let him steal me away. I wanted to be with him anyway, not alone in a giant bed in a strange city.
He fumbled with the room key, and when he finally got the door open, he became ravenous, locking us in, tearing my clothes off before I could resist him.
"Lauren, I am so in love with you I don't even know how to tell you." He worked the buttons on my blouse first, then peeled it off as he kissed my shoulders and chest. "And the only thing I can think of, the only way I can think of to show you how much, is to be one with you."
His hands were so warm as they moved up my torso to cup my breasts, gentle and tender as he undid my bra. "Please, Lauren, let me show you."
I nodded, unable to find my voice, and he gently laid me down on the hotel bed. His eyes filled with such longing and desire, it stole my breath all over again. Heat pooled between my thighs as he kissed his way down my stomach, his tongue dancing along my skin in patterns that made me shiver and moan. He reached the waistband of my skirt and looked up at me.
"No orders this time," he whispered before hooking his thumbs into the waistband and slid my skirt and panties down with a single tug. Then he was between my legs, hot breath teasing me as his hands gripped my hips and he brought his face close to my core. His first kiss sent a spark straight through me, and I arched my back off the bed.
"Oh, Lauren," he moaned into me. “My God, I never thought I’d feel this way for anyone ever again, but you…”
His tongue was hot and wet and wonderful, and it sent tingles across my skin. My body shuddered as he explored every inch of my folds and crevices. I weaved my hands through his hair and watched his expert ministrations. His tongue, his lips, even the gentle scrape of his stubble against my most sensitive spots. It felt so comfortable, as if I’d known him my whole life and we’d been partners forever. And his confession of love only heightened the pleasure, making my body scream for release only he could give me.
“D… oh, God,” I moaned, unable to form coherent words. I was so close.
He grinned up at me, his green eyes sparkling mischievously before he went back to work. Faster and faster his tongue moved, caressing and teasing me until I couldn’t take much more. My entire body tensed and my nails dug into the sheets as I came apart in his mouth. The release washed over me in waves, crashing over me one after another, each one more intense than the last. My body trembled and shook, and I felt him kissing my thighs, my stomach, my breasts before finally reaching my mouth again.
“I love you, Lauren,” he said, his voice hoarse from exertion. “I’ve loved you since the moment you bossed your way into my life and turned my world upside down.” He hovered over me as he began undressing himself.
I smiled up at him, my heart full to bursting. “ I meant what I said. I love you too, David. And…” I swallowed hard, feeling a blush creep up my cheeks. “I want you to make love to me. Properly.”
“I guess that’s not an order?” His sly smirk as he fully undressed before he kissed me made me grin against his lips as he nestled his body between my thighs. “Oh, crap… condom…”
The startling lack of his heat against me made me shiver when he pulled away to reach into his suitcase on the floor next to the bed. His hand came back with a foil pack, and he tore it open with his teeth and sheathed himself in the latex. He grinned at me sheepishly, and then he was back between my legs and ready to go.
“I’m all yours.” His voice was choked with emotion as he began to push into me, inch by delicious inch.
The feeling of him inside me was indescribable, hot and full and perfect. My muscles clenched around his length as we moved together, his hips rocking against mine. I wrapped my legs around his waist, urging him faster and deeper. Sweat began to glisten on my skin as I groped him and ground my hips in rhythm with his. He kissed me and nipped at my skin, then kneaded one breast, then the other.
I breathed, arching my back and meeting him thrust for thrust. The bed rocked with our feverish motions, the headboard thudding against the wall, muffling our gasps and moans.
His fingers danced across my skin as he pushed deeper, our bodies melting together. With each thrust, my body craved more of him. My hands curled around his shoulders, digging into his skin as I held on for dear life. His mouth found mine again and devoured me with kisses that made my toes curl. The taste of us, mixed with sweat and desire, filled my mouth as we moved together in a primal rhythm that echoed across the room.
The bed shook with every powerful stroke, creaking under our combined weight. The sheets tangled around our legs and added a sense of urgency to the moment. My breathing became ragged as he picked up the pace, each moan muffled by another kiss or groan. He was exquisite, the friction of his thrusts inside me almost cathartic.
"God, I love you so much," he panted in my ear before he claimed my mouth once more. His thrusts became even more insistent, his body trembling against mine. The pleasure built inside me, coiling tighter and tighter, like a spring wound too tightly at the end of its limits.
"I love you too," I gasped, the words barely audible between heavy breaths and moans. "I'm… oh, God. David, I'm… " My words dissolved into a long, drawn-out moan as my orgasm hit me with a powerful convulsion. Every nerve ending in my body was alight with white-hot pleasure. My muscles spasmed around his length, milking him even harder as he thrust into me more erratically before he groaned his release.
David collapsed on top of me, his body still hard inside mine. His heart pounded against flesh, our chests heaving in unison. We lay there for what felt like an eternity, our ragged breaths mingling together in the quiet of the room. His arms remained wrapped around me, refusing to let go. Neither of us wanted to break the spell that had overtaken us. I ran my fingers through his hair, then lower across his back. He kissed my chest, then sucked a nipple into his mouth.
"Now what?" I asked, finally starting to calm.
David kissed my chest and rose up, pulling out of me. He slipped off the bed and tugged the full condom off his dick as it deflated. Then he rolled back into bed and held me, covering us both with the blanket.
"Now we enjoy every second of this weekend." I knew he was going to let me down, but somehow, I didn't even care right now. "Because when we go back, we really do have to keep this thing a secret. We've discussed how difficult it will be if we tell the board. It might be possible, but there are far-reaching consequences. Promise me. Keeping us a secret for nine more months will be far easier on both of us than nine months of whatever hell the board puts us through."
I knew he was right, but it didn't stop the disappointment. So I turned on my side to let him curl around me closer. In this position, I managed to hide my sour expression, but I couldn't hide my love, not anymore. It was out of the bag, and I wasn’t putting it back in. I wanted the whole world to know, but clearly, he wasn't ready for that step.
And if I really were pregnant, we didn't have a year, anyway. It was none of the board's business, or any hospital administration, for that matter, who the father was. A pregnancy wouldn't draw any red flags for them
But David would want to know, and how would I explain that? It was time to get a test and find out because like it or not, if I was pregnant, that changed everything. I just hope it changed it in a good way.