Chapter 26
I AM TOO SPECIAL
ETHAN
I listened to the beeps of my heart monitor and how it got fast when I thought about Kiara and her hurt stricken face when I said those things to her. I had never hated myself more than I did at that moment, lying to her and seeing a tear slide down her cheek just because I was being an asshole.
I wanted to see her and apologize to her as soon as I said that, but I was so mad and angry.
Even Liam scolded me for saying that to her when she left us.
And I took all that anger out by fighting with some guys who were teasing Rio with harsh words just because of his sexuality.
I couldn’t take it anymore and I snapped at them.
My mothers scolded me when I came out of the unconsciousness, and I hated hurting them, seeing them sad because I couldn’t control my anger. So, when they said Kiara and everyone was waiting patiently to talk to me, I bailed. I told them I didn’t want to talk to anyone and wanted to be alone.
I didn’t want Kiara to see me like this. She would get sad and I didn’t want to cause her more hurt or pain.
I had closed my eyes and I was counting my breaths when I heard someone open the door.
I saw it was Kiara peeking in to check up on me.
My breath wavered and I swallowed the lump in my throat seeing her.
Her hair was messily braided, leaving strands framing her face, her warm golden-brown eyes glistening with tears, and I knew she had cried a lot.
I did that. I made her cry.
“Sorry,” she whispered. “I didn’t want to wake you up. I was just checking up on you.” She took a shuddering breath and looked away from me. “I’ll wait outside.”
“No,” I said and cleared my throat. “Stay. Come here. I . . . I want to talk to you.”
Kiara paused her hand on the door and looked me straight in the eye.
I saw the turmoil of emotions in her eyes and the slight clench in her jaw.
I wanted her to be mad at me and scold me for being an inconsiderate asshole and judging her as soon as I saw her with Liam.
And I needed to apologize to her for comparing her to Ariana and thinking she would do the same.
I sighed in relief when she stepped inside and walked to the chair beside my bed. I was about to sit up, but she gently laid her hand on my shoulder. “No, Ethan, you should get some rest.”
She pulled her hand away when I lay down and saw her sit on the chair.
“How are you, Bella?” I asked her when she looked over the bandage around my head and knuckles.
“I am fine.” She chuckled and shook her head. “You’re the one in the hospital bed and you’re asking me if I am okay?”
I raked my eyes over her and said, “I am so sorry, Kiara. I shouldn’t have said those things to you. I didn’t mean any of them. I was angry seeing you with Liam, who was holding you, and then you said you had kissed him and I . . . I snapped at you.” I closed eyes shut. “I am really sorry.”
Her soft, warm hand held mine, and I looked at her kissing my knuckles and staring at our adjoined hands. “I am sorry too for never telling you about it.” She took a deep breath. “I liked him. We kissed once and then the whole school knew he was with Ariana. Nothing else happened, E.”
I nodded, wanting the scent of her black vanilla and coconut closer to me. “I know, Bella. Come here.”
She sat on the bed and I winced internally when she looked over how many wounds I had. Uh-oh.
“Did you really have to start a fight?” she asked, her voice firm.
I clenched my jaw. “Yes. If you had heard what he said about you and then teasing Rio for . . .” I sighed. “You would have done the same, Kiara. I just used my fists more.”
“And look what happened.” She shook her head and pulled her hand from mine. I wanted to pull her closer when tears glistened in her eyes. “You know what? Yes, I am fucking hurt. You hurt me. Nothing would have gone wrong if you had just walked away.”
I winced at her tone and didn't say anything, watching her chest heave with anger and hurt. She hastily wiped the tears from her cheeks. "You should have just walked away, E.”
Her lower lip was quivering, and she was biting on it to not let her voice break. I licked my lips and calmly said, “They were verbally harassing Rio. Paul knew you had left crying and I punched him.”
She squeezed her eyes shut. "You could've died!"
Kiara looked at me, tears burning in her eyes.
"Do you . . . Do you know how terrifying it was for me to listen to Katherine tell me you are unconscious and in the hospital? It all felt the same when I drove here thinking that I would lose you too. I don’t know what I would do if something happened to you. ”
"I was so scared, Ethan,” she whispered. “I don't ever want to see you get hurt. You're too special to me because I love you.”
I froze listening to her words. She snapped her wide eyes at me, and her lips parted as she realized what she had said.
“Say that again,” I said, sitting up and ignoring her concern. “Say it, Kiara.”
She touched my cheek. “I love you, Ethan, and I don’t want to see you like this. Ever again.”
I was grinning now. My best friend loved me. Kiara Sharma loved me. I wanted to go and tell my mothers about this and yell it to the world that Kiara Sharma, my best friend, loved me.
“I love you too, Bella,” I said and pulled her closer, hugging her tightly, and took a deep breath when her coconut scent wafted over me, her hands clutching mine.
She pulled away, her wide chocolatey eyes staring up at me. “You do?”
“Yes, fuck yes!” I laughed and kissed her. “I love you so much, Bella.”
She grinned when we kissed clumsily and I pressed her closer to me, wanting to embrace and kiss every part of the woman I loved. I kissed away her tears until she was laughing for me to stop it because it was ticklish.
“Say it again, Kiara,” I whispered, kissing her neck, “I want to hear you say it.”
“I love you, Ethan,” she said it so sweetly that I wanted to capture her saying that in something so I could get high on the sound of her saying those words to me.
I kissed her again gently, passionately, pouring all the love I had for her in that kiss. Her hands stayed on my chest, scrunching the dull minted T-shirt. I cupped her cheek and held her waist so I could pull her closer to me.
We pulled away, our foreheads leaning against each other as we both panted for more air. We laughed when the monitor in the background kept beeping loudly because of our kiss.