Chapter 35 Peter
PETER
“Iwould ask you how you are, but I know it’s a stupid question,” Benedict said, walking beside Peter. The candlelit procession had left the temple with two dozen people, but as they passed through town, others joined to take Faye to her final resting place.
“I still appreciate you asking,” Peter said, glad to have his brother by his side. He was the only person Peter could tolerate right now.
“You haven’t seen her? Spoken to her?” Benedict was never afraid to ask the hard questions.
“Faye’s still in the resting phase, and Gregory wouldn’t let me anywhere near her even if she wasn’t,” Peter told him.
“He covered for me with the higher-ups. As my mentor, he has every right to collect any souls I’m assigned, but they know something went wrong.
I’ve decided to give him some peace for a while and make myself scarce. ”
“Is something going to happen to you? Did they increase your sentence?” Benedict asked as the procession passed Stoker’s Café. A sign on the door read Closed Indefinitely.
“No, I’ll just go back to collecting.” Peter didn’t want him to worry.
“Why do I get the feeling you’re leaving something out?” Benedict stopped at the edge of the treeline, letting the procession go ahead.
Peter stared at his feet. He’d hoped to slip away after the funeral unnoticed to avoid having this very conversation.
“I won’t be back for a while,” he said reluctantly. “I can’t be here with all of you, but if you need me, Grams will know how to summon me.” A seance was the quickest way to get his attention.
“I understand, but we’ll be here if and when you need us. You aren’t alone.” Benedict rested his hand on his shoulder, and Peter nearly lost all composure. He straightened his back and stuffed down the wave of nauseating sadness.
They reached the woods, where the stars lit their path.
Despite Faye not being a witch, the coven had granted her a blessed funeral.
Sacred rites would be spoken to ensure her soul would be welcomed by her ancestors and find peace.
Then her body would be burned on a pyre surrounded by her favourite flowers to honour her return to nature.
It was the highest honour they could’ve bestowed on her.
It showed everyone that she was a part of the Hawthorne family – if not by blood, then by spirit. That Foxford was her home.
“She would’ve hated all the attention,” Peter said as he and Benedict made their way through the woods to the pyre decorated with vibrant flowers. The night was clear, as though the stars wanted to watch her find her final rest.
Faye was placed on the pyre, a soft bed of moss and grass.
Peter stopped at the edge of the circle of trees as he noticed Faye’s parents standing with some coven members, and his sadness turned to rage.
“What the hell are they doing here?!” he hissed.
“You know, in all the months we lived together, in all the months I watched over her before, they never once called her. Never checked if she was alright. I even went to find them once, hoping to find a way to reunite them, but when I snuck into their home, they didn’t even have a single photo of her.
They had already erased her from their lives! ”
“They lost their daughter.” Benedict, ever the diplomat.
Peter couldn’t stand to watch as they placed flowers on her shrouded body. Her mother even dared to shed a tear. He clenched his fists, threatening to snap his own fingers. They hadn’t even brought her favourites. She preferred white roses to red.
“She was already dead to them. I believe those were their words, not hers,” he seethed.
“Don’t make a scene, for Faye’s sake. No matter what they did while she was alive and how much you want to hurt them, I’m sure they’re hurting too. If they didn’t care, they never would’ve come.”
“Or they want sympathy from everyone else, and they don’t want the town to think they’re awful people for abandoning her,” Peter retorted, directing his anger at them instead of at himself for a nice change of pace.
“Peter.” Benedict’s stern tone wasn’t lost on him.
“Benedict. I don’t need to be lectured right now. I can barely stand to look at them, let alone handle a confrontation,” Peter snapped. He’d never make a scene; Faye deserved peace.
Benedict clenched his jaw, and Peter took a steadying breath. “You should join the coven; they need you to say the final blessing.”
“Are you going to be alright alone?” Benedict asked sadly.
Will there ever be a time when my brother doesn’t worry about me? “Lucy needs your support. She lost her friend; you should be by her side,” Peter said, forcing a smile. Besides, he wasn’t alone – he glanced at the branch above, where Scarlett watched the funeral.
Benedict patted him on the back and joined Lucy’s side. This was her first sacred funeral as High Priestess, and he couldn’t imagine how hard it was to have to lead the ritual and say goodbye to her best friend. He wished he could have given them more time.
Benedict lit the pyre with his magic while Lucy said the final blessing, playing Faye’s favourite song. Some cried; others sang along. Peter brought Faye’s favourite cupcake cases, something they’d used the first time they had baked together, and carefully placed them in the flames.
He lingered among the trees as the coven recited a prayer to return her to the earth.
Lucy, the unwavering High Priestess, held it together with a resilience that he envied.
Peter couldn’t bring himself to stay longer or share memories to honour her legacy.
He felt he had failed Faye, and the weight of his grief was a constant reminder of his inability to save another person he loved.
Lucy made eye contact with him and beckoned him over, but he disappeared into the trees.
Night turned to day as he sat by the lake, where they’d shared their first kiss.
Sitting at the end of the dock, reliving their shared moment, was a bittersweet torture Peter didn’t plan on giving up anytime soon.
Scarlett dived in and out of the lake as she tried to catch a fish for her dinner; seeing her appetite returning brought him some relief.
For weeks, as the coven wrapped up the investigation with the Hunters, Peter had tried to keep Stoker’s going, but it was like the sunlight had gone out of the place.
Scarlett kept breaking out of the inn and returning to him; she had even been desperate enough not to bite or burn him.
She had made herself a nest on Faye’s bed and refused to leave, no matter how much Luisa and Lucy coaxed her.
Peter brought her food every day, which she would only accept from him.
He didn’t want the poor creature to starve in her grief.
He watched her fly out of the water with a fish in her mouth. It was the most active she had been in weeks. He hoped that her bond would weaken in time; Faye’s heart would break if anything happened to her pet.
“This is for you.”
Peter turned to see Suzy, using an umbrella to protect herself from the rising sun.
“I don’t want company,” he huffed.
“You’ll want to hear this.” Suzy held a phone out to him.
“What is it?”
“Faye left you a message. She called the Manor on her way back from the competition and asked me to record it, and give it to you after her funeral,” Suzy told him.
Peter snatched the phone from her hand so quickly that Suzy recoiled in surprise. It seemed he was frightening everyone in his life.
He held the phone, staring at the recorded memo. He wanted to hear her voice, but once he pressed play, he wouldn’t be able to listen to whatever she wanted to tell him for the first time again.
Are you recording?
Faye’s voice took his breath away.
Yes, you can start whenever you’re ready, Suzy replied.
Okay. I’ll try to keep this short.
Peter heard her take a deep breath. He held on to every word and sound she made.
I’m sorry, Peter. I know how hard you’ve tried to protect me, but we can’t alter our fate.
You thought I didn’t know about your assignment?
I knew the moment you refused to leave my side, from all your little chess moves, that you were trying to protect me.
I knew my time was coming, and I’m at peace with it.
Truly. So, stop blaming yourself and alienating yourself from those who love you.
They need you as much as you need them. I wish I could be there to wrap my arms around you and tell you that everything is going to be okay, but I can’t, and that hurts far worse than anything I’ve been through.
She sounded in control, but he knew when she was holding back tears.
I don’t want to leave you, but this is the end of my story.
It was ours for a time, and these have been the best months of my life.
You helped me find my life again. I got to know my friends again and live my dream.
You granted my every wish, but this is my ending. Forgive me for not including you in it.
I know, you promised to be with me when my time came, but I needed to finish this alone.
I needed to write my own ending, whatever it may be, and I knew you wouldn’t be able to stop yourself from trying to save me.
Please, please stop beating yourself up for not being with me in those final moments.
Gregory promised to help me find peace. He loves you, so please don’t be mad at him for following my wishes.
I have to say goodbye, but please know that I don’t want to.
I wish we could have had one more hour, day, or night together, but that’s just me being greedy.
I’ll cherish the time we had together; you gave me the best days of my life.
I love you so fucking much. Faye’s declaration held a hint of humour and a wave of sadness.
Peter smiled to himself as she cursed, a rarity for her.
I’m sorry that I broke my promise and left you alone. I hope you forgive me. If not in this life, then maybe in the next I’ll get to see and hold you again.
Peter heard her voice shake. He desperately wanted to reach through the phone and comfort her. Scarlett flew down and snuggled into his leg beside him, staring at the phone as she recognised Faye’s voice.
Okay, I need to go before I start crying again.
Before I do, I left the recipe for the chocolate cake you love in my recipe book on the top right-hand drawer of my desk.
You make it better than I do now, so please think of me when you enjoy it – but please don’t think of me too much; I don’t want you to be lost in sadness when you gave me the happiest time of my life.
Please ask Lucy and Luisa to care for Scarlett.
I’ve frozen plenty of steaks and icing in the freezer, prepared just as she likes them, to help her get through the worst days.
I don’t want her to start shedding scales from the grief, and I think we both know she loves cream cheese frosting more than me.
Peter knew that wasn’t true, but hearing Faye’s laughter, he would agree with whatever she said. He smiled through the tears, wishing he could tell her how much he loved her, how much he missed her. His soul felt like it would tear in two.
I love you. I already said that, but I haven’t said it enough... Her voice trailed off, and Peter was terrified that was the end of the message.
Thank you for loving me, Faye added quickly. Peter’s chest tightened painfully as he heard her voice break.
Faye cleared her throat. Suzy, you can stop recording now.
Peter guessed the pause had been her trying to compose herself because she didn’t want him to hear her crying.
Faye? Suzy’s voice trembled.
Yes?
I’m sorry.
Keep an eye on him for me. Faye sighed softly, resigned to a fate Peter would never accept.
I will.
The recording ended, and the sound of Faye’s voice was replaced with Scarlett’s whining. She clawed at his leg.
“Want to hear it again?” he asked, stroking her scales. Scarlett crawled into his lap and rested her head on his knee.
Peter pressed play again and again. He only snapped back to reality when the phone battery died. He clenched it to his chest and swallowed the sob trapped in his throat. He hadn’t thought a heart could break once it had stopped beating, but he couldn’t have been more wrong.