Chapter 3
CHAPTER THREE
RUSTY
A n hour later, Ash and I are in the Sugar Maple Town Hall, where the mayor's office is, and where the town council and chamber of commerce both meet. It's a small colonial style building with impeccable landscaping. The mayor cares a lot about appearances.
We're in the large conference room along with a couple dozen people on the town council and chamber of commerce. I've never seen so many members attend a meeting, and as much as I want to believe it's because they're excited about our presentation, I have a feeling something else is afoot.
The owner of the diner is here. Bill Buckner hasn't come to a meeting in a few years. He lives in Charleston and runs a much bigger restaurant there. He's become totally hands off, leaving everything to his head server and de facto manager, Tia. Everyone keeps waiting for him to sell it to her, considering he’s never in Sugar Maple. He doesn't seem to care about the diner as long as it makes him money .
The chamber of commerce includes a few friendly faces, including the co-owner of Donegal's bar, Sean. I've been friends with Patty and Sean for years. Patty wouldn't be caught dead in a meeting like this, but Sean's all about community. Ash’s friends Lou and Parker are both here representing their marketing firm, Jane it's about Ash.
I watch her with a mix of awe and apprehension.
"And of course, I don't have to tell you the value of using a font from this century, but I will anyway," she's saying .
She is undaunted. No matter how blank a stare she gets or how dumb a question, she soldiers on, all quirky and gorgeous and flipping her hair to make points in a way that almost mesmerizes me.
With every glance around the room, though, I take note of the people who are scoffing or rolling their eyes. I catch Parker glaring at some of those same men. One of them recoils and sits straighter. I get it. She'll rip them a new one faster than a honey badger. Only a fool messes with Parker.
Only a fool messes with Ash, too, but it's not because of what she'll do to them.
"It's just so much money for something that matters so little," Bill Buckner says, and Parker, Lou, and a few others snap their heads toward him.
"Your other restaurant is in Charleston ," Ash says, sounding confused. "It's the poster child for urban design. We don't even have visual cues that tell tourists about the riverwalk."
"Because Sugar Maple is not Charleston," he argues.
"And it won't be with that attitude."
"A riverwalk is not an ocean! And Sugar Maple has no historic significance."
"We have a fort from the Spanish Invasion!" Chick Parkinson says.
"One fort doesn't compare!"
"Oh, you've gotten too big for your britches," Chick Allen says, waving a hand at him. "I'm fixin' to rethink my stance just to spite you."
Ash grabs my forearm. If we can get the Chicks, we may have enough votes.
"You're too smart to do something so crazy," Bill says. Ash goes rigid at the word. "Can you imagine a peach-colored hardware store?"
"A peach-colored hardware store?" Chick Allen looks like he's about to have a heart attack .
"There are a half dozen paint colors to choose from, including plenty of greens and blues," Parker says to Bill. "You watched the same presentation we did. Stop trying to make trouble."
Lou looks at Bill shrewdly, but she has an innocent look to her that tells me she's playing dumb. "Mr. Buckner," she says to Bill, "your restaurant in Charleston is doing well for you, ain’t it? What an honor that you'd find time in your busy schedule to come to Sugar Maple today, of all days. Especially when you've ignored the town for years." Lou's from Georgia, so she always has an accent. But it's a bit thicker right now.
"I can come to any meeting I like," Bill says.
"You can, but you haven't," Lou says. "I don't mean nothin' by it. I find the timing interesting is all."
"She brings up a good point," Chick Hanks says.
"How'd these girls get in here, anyway?" Bill asks, pointing to Parker and Lou.
"You want to phrase that differently," Tripp says, not asking.
"We've owned a marketing firm in town for, gee, comin' on ten months," Lou says innocently. "But you've probably been too busy in Charleston to come home that whole time, haven't you? Bless your heart."
Teddy Prescott, our pretentious mayor, clears his throat. "No need to get nasty."
"I notice you didn't find Bill's comment nasty," the owner of the antiques store says.
"Now don't go readin' into every little thing," Teddy says. "It's a reminder for everyone to keep things civil. And I, for one, am interested in hearing Bill's perspective."
Bill's perspective? Teddy cares about appearances more than anyone in this room. He, of all people, should love the idea of giving the town a face lift. He's the kind of guy who was told how attractive he was his whole life, and now that he's approaching middle-age, he's having a hard time letting go of being a prize pony. Something about a man frequenting tanning beds and getting enough botox to freeze a pond screams "insecurity."
But Teddy entertaining Bill's skepticism opens a can of worms.
"Bill's perspective is that he doesn't want to spend money on a town he doesn't care about," Tripp says.
"I love this town!" Bill protests.
"Why do you care so much?" Teddy asks Tripp. "Did you bring in these hotshots from Chicago in some ploy to take over the town and become mayor?"
Chick Parkinson laughs. "Tripp Carville is twelve dollars away from being a billionaire. What does he want with being mayor?"
"Prestige," Teddy says, his unnaturally tanned skin flushing against his equally unnaturally white teeth.
"Prestige?" Chick Parkinson and a handful of people laugh, but at least a few don't. Are they really worried that Tripp is going to take over the town?
I'm about to ask this, but Teddy starts blustering. "You're tryin' to take over this place! Your little friends want us all to 'invest' in some scheme that will benefit you more than anyone."
"Are you serious?" Ash asks. She looks like a rubber band wound around a toy propeller. If she twists one more time, she'll snap. If she lets go, she'll unwind too hard, too fast, and too chaotically. "Sugar Maple Farms' success has made all of you money, and we did that ! My company!"
"You mean the hot one did that," Teddy says under his breath.
And my vision goes red.
And I rush Teddy.
Fortunately for him, Tripp gets there first, so all I can do is line up behind my six-foot-five beast of a best friend.
I am boiling .
"You should stop talking 'bout my wife." Tripp towers over Teddy. I don't think he'd ever get violent, but he doesn't mind standing and letting his size intimidate him a bit. Teddy rears back in his seat, even though Tripp is five feet away.
"Rude," Lou says under her breath. "He was obviously talking about me."
Parker and Ash both snort, but I don't. My neck is so hot, steam is coming off my head.
Teddy isn't worth it, I tell myself.
He insulted Ash, I argue with myself.
He's a small, scared fool whose only power comes from making other people feel small.
My breath is choppy as I squeeze my fists to the breaking point. I want to move Tripp aside and turn his threats into a reality on Teddy's face.
Not her. He doesn't get to do that to her.
Ash is too fixated on Tripp and Teddy to notice me, and for once, I'm glad she's oblivious to how I feel. I don't want her to see me like this. This Jekyll and Hyde version of me where it takes every ounce of focus and control not to explode.
I haven't felt this kind of anger in so long, I almost let myself forget that it exists. I focus on my breathing, trying to turn down the heat searing my veins.
I can't let her see me this angry.
I can't let her think I'm a bad person.
Lou keeps cracking jokes until Tripp chuckles and returns to his seat.
Ash looks over at me with wide eyes that scream, did that just happen?
I wish I could give her a smile or a joke, but I'm still simmering. When Bill starts talking, I use the rest of my self-control to cool down.
"It's certainly clear how Tripp feels about people commenting on his wife," Bill says with a laugh that few people match. "But it's also clear that if Sugar Maple is going to become a popular tourist destination, this … bumbling B Team effort won't cut it."
And I'm back to full boil. "They all consulted on this, you small-minded, sexist idiot. Why don't you go back to Charleston and the little knock-off Margaritaville man-cave you crawled out of and leave the decisions to people who aren't threatened by intelligent women? You're embarrassing yourself."
Out of the corner of my eye, I see Ash's mouth open. I also see Lou hold her hand above her head, and Parker high-fives it without looking.
I shouldn't have said it. I shouldn't have let Bill get under my skin.
But no one makes Ash feel small around me.
No one.
Bill grumbles, red-faced with embarrassment while Teddy brings the room back to order. People are laughing behind Bill's back — literally, because he's at the front of the room — but they're laughing at him because of me. Bile slicks the back of my throat. I should have said it differently. Only a bad person drags other people down for their own gratification.
I'm no better than Teddy or Bill.
I'm no better than? —
I can't think about it. Can't think about him .
Chick Hanks grumbles. "There's a lot on the agenda today. Can we take a vote and move along, already?"
Teddy nods. "That's a great idea, Chick. Thank you. Does anyone have anything else to add about revitalizing Maple Street? Anyone at all?"
"In fact, I do." Bill hitches up his belt. "I have a better idea than colors and … cosmetic updates." He pauses. "An outside investor. A neutral one."
"A neutral outside investor?" Teddy repeats. "Tell us more. "
"He's promising a lot of money, and he's interested in taking over Maple Street and other businesses for a very generous price. We're talking enough to retire on." Excitement buzzes around the room like flies on something rotten. "He'd hoped to be here this morning, but his flight was delayed a couple of hours. Perhaps we can have another meeting tomorrow? — "
"No," Tripp says loudly. "Some of us have jobs, Bill. The next meeting is in two weeks."
"Oh, come off it," Teddy says. "He has an investor promising us all good money! The least we could do is hear the man out."
"Of course we can," Sean says, and my eyes about pop out of my head. "In two weeks. I ain't closin' the bar for two meetings in a week."
"It's a bar," Teddy says. "What lush is drinkin' at eleven in the a.m?"
"It's a pub," I say before I can stop myself, "and last I checked, your wife eats lunch there."
"Well, then, maybe she ran into ol' Arlo." Teddy's eyes narrow to points. "Or is AA still workin' out for dear ol’ dad?"
"Out of order," Chick Hanks yells.
"You're the mayor," Tripp barks. "Grow up."
"I'll do as I please," Teddy snaps. "I know y'all have jobs. So do I! But does anyone really want to wait two weeks to find out how rich this guy could make us?"
"Rich is dramatically overstating it," Lou says. "This bigshot investor won’t be looking to buy your intellectual property, but rather your lease or your land. And he'll probably prevent you from starting something somewhere else in town to keep out competition."
"Don’t listen to her!" Bill says. "It's a much better deal than all that."
"If this man is so desperate to offer you such a great deal, making him wait will only drive up your value," Lou says. "Don't rush into this, y'all. "
"I vote we make him wait," Tripp says. "And in that time, I'm sure Jane & Co. would be happy to meet with any of you individually to talk about how their proposal could work for you."
"We would," Parker assures them.
I shoot my eyes to Ash, and my heart drops. Her lower lip is jutted out. Somewhere in this melee, she lost her confidence. I was too busy wanting to defend her to help her the way she needed.
People start voting around the room, with Sean voting to wait on behalf of the bar and grill, even though I guarantee Patty would rather sell the place. Somehow, all three Chicks agree to wait (trash talking the historic fort was the death knell for Bill and Teddy).
But there are enough others who are curious about the money, and they vote in favor of meeting again tomorrow. Teddy votes to hear the investor immediately and says he's authorized to speak for his wife, who runs a souvenir store.
Ash takes a step backward and bumps into me. I put a hand on her lower back, steadying her. She looks at me with those cornflower blue eyes that squeeze my heart. Touching her is always torture, because this is all I ever get — brief grazes and shows of support. I never get as much as I want, which, in fairness, is a lifetime of touching her. Holding her. Never letting her go …
I need to stop thinking about myself. This isn't about what I want, it's about what Ash needs.
Support.
Because the last no is given, and we're short one vote.
"Well," Teddy starts, "it looks like? — "
"Give me two weeks," Ash blurts.
Teddy rocks back. "Excuse me? Two weeks for what?"
"For me to prove our ideas work! Don't meet with the investor until you see what we can do. "
Teddy's eyes flash to Bill's. "What could you do in two weeks?"
"I'll do a social media blitz for you. All of you. I'll have your shops go viral faster than the flu."
"Ash …" I say quietly.
She gives a tiny shake of her head, but the effect on her hair is like throwing a pebble in the middle of a pond and seeing the ripples grow bigger. The movement may be small, but her curls spread out en masse. "If you like what I've done, then when the investor comes in two weeks, you’ll have enough information to make an informed decision. By then, my results will speak for themselves. You'll know I can do this. We can do this."
"We already voted. It's no use — " Teddy protests, but most everyone else in the "no" camp switches quickly.
"Yes."
"Two weeks of free marketing? I'll take it."
"Count me in."
Bill expresses his outrage, but there's nothing to be done. The votes flip to temporary yeses, and Teddy's already frozen face looks like it's fixin' to shatter. "All right, then. It looks like you have two weeks to convince us that your … ideas have merit." He manages to make "ideas" sound pejorative.
He pounds the gavel he bought himself, and the meeting moves on to the next item on the list. Lou and Parker cast looks at each other and then Ash like they're as worried about her as I am.
A two-week social media blitz is no small thing, especially not across dozens of accounts. Most of them don't even have consistent branding, let alone an online presence. She's going to spend every waking (and sleeping) moment on this.
Ash already leans toward burnout. She hyperfocuses to the point of exhilaration and then, shortly after, exhaustion.
I’m already worried about her.
With the meeting continuing, we take seats at the back of the room, and the buzz of energy that has sustained Ash all night wears off.
"I can't lose this," she whispers. She leans her head against my shoulder, but it's for support, not affection. It's the way she'd treat one of her brothers, not the way I want her to treat me. "We were so compelling! Everything makes sense! And they didn't even care." Her voice is smaller than her whisper. "Was it because of me?"
I bump her gently off my shoulder so she's forced to look at me. "Not even close. It had nothing to do with you or our presentation. People are tired, and the promise of fast money is alluring to anyone. You were perfect."
"I was scattered and weird."
"You were smart, funny, and perfect," I insist.
Her lips tug downward, but to the side, too, like she wants to believe me but can't. "Why are you so good to me?"
Because I love you. Because you're the person I want to be good for.
Now would be the perfect time to hug her and kiss her forehead, to cross that boundary between friend and would-be-boyfriend.
But knowing me, I'd probably give her a wet willie, instead.
I never cared to date much before Ash, but I'm a decent looking guy. I've usually got a bit of game.
With her, I have none. No offense, no defense, because I won't even let myself get on the field. She's playing tennis while I'm playing baseball. I can't entertain playing the same game as her, because once that idea takes root in my head, it will never leave. And that's why I do things like call her pal or give her a noogie the second I get her in my arms. I never even noogied my own sister before she passed. Why would I do it to the girl I want to be with?
Because I'm a mess. My feelings for her are a boundless coil of emotion I cannot let unravel. I want to be the best version of myself for her, but it's impossible to ignore that any version of myself could ever deserve her.
So as she crashes and falls asleep on my shoulder, all I can do is watch her instead of the next presentation. I listen to her quiet exhale instead of the speakers. I feel the stir of breath against my neck instead of the whir of the air conditioning when it finally kicks on.
And I pine. For every second of the next hour, I pine.