Chapter Thirty-Three
Dani
“Thank you again. I’ll be in touch.” I shook the hand of one of the silent auction winners from last night before she walked out the hotel’s main doors to her waiting taxi.
I wasn’t the official farewell committee, but I’d sort of fallen into the role while carting the rest of HBC’s stuff to the lobby to be packed into volunteer cars and brought back to the office.
Most of the out-of-town guests had already left, the hotel’s impressive continental breakfast was winding down, and as soon as the last of these boxes were out of here, I would be too, back to my apartment and into pajamas, where I’d spend the rest of the day vegging out on my couch while watching reruns of Project Runway .
There would be no productivity until Tuesday since Talia insisted I take Monday off, and honestly, I wasn’t sure my brain would fully work again until then anyway. Especially after I’d spent all last night poring over our final fundraiser numbers to keep from focusing on anything else that had happened.
I wanted to text him.
I wanted to text him so badly to tell him how much more we’d raised than we’d hoped, and how every single guest I spoke to raved about the food. I wanted to send him every online article and social media post I saw about the virtual panel, which I never would have had the courage to suggest doing in the first place if it weren’t for him.
I wanted to ask him if he was okay. If I could come over.
I wanted to hold him. Kiss him. Curl into him and around him and meld myself to him, catch the pieces of him that so desperately needed to fall apart so they could fit themselves back together without all the rust and gunk and pain that was wedged in there now.
I just wanted to see him. Hear his voice. Read his name pop up on my phone.
It wouldn’t. Not today, at least.
I didn’t know for how long, but there were a lot of seasons of Project Runway to distract me in the meantime, and if that was what I had to do to give him the space he needed, then that was what I’d do. After everything he’d done for me, it was the least I could do.
“Oh. Hey.”
I abandoned the box of branded tablecloths I’d started reorganizing and rose from my crouch, prepared to greet one of the staff volunteers. Instead, I found myself face-to-face with Alec.
He stood tall and straight, his broad shoulders filling his crisp button-down shirt, his short brown hair neatly styled, and his bright blue eyes on full display. His hands were tucked into his pants pockets, the only sign he was at all uncomfortable.
He was as handsome as I remembered. Maybe even more so, those last boyish charms from college having matured into adulthood. If you’d have asked me my junior year what Alec would look like in ten years, this would have been it. A prince among men, assured and composed, successful in all things. As close to perfection as you could get.
His hand fidgeted in his pocket, and I wondered for the first time if his version of perfection was as calculated as mine had been. I hoped not. I wouldn’t want him living with that burden.
“Hey,” I said. I fiddled with the pendant of my necklace and glanced toward the elevator. “Where’s Stephanie?”
“She has a few friends who live in Philly. They’re out to brunch.”
“Oh. That’s nice.”
He nodded.
I dragged the pendant along its chain and dropped my gaze to the boxes. I looked back up again. “Did you both enjoy the gala? I mean, after, um?—”
“Yeah, it was great,” he said, pulling a hand from his pocket to make some sort of gesture. He seemed to second-guess it halfway through, or maybe didn’t know what he’d meant to do in the first place, so his hand just kind of hung there between us before he finally scratched the back of his neck. “You did a really good job. The food especially was fantastic.”
I couldn’t help my smile. “That was all your brother’s doing.”
He gave an uncomfortable laugh and peered at his shoes. “Yeah…I was actually hoping to catch him this morning before I left. Do you know if he’s around? He sort of disappeared last night.”
“I’m not expecting him to be here today,” I said, keeping my voice what I hoped was naturally light. “You might have better luck calling.”
His mouth pulled weakly to one side. “I’m not so sure about that.”
I wasn’t either, but it didn’t feel right to say it. Whatever was between Jase and his brother wasn’t for me to get in the middle of. Yes, I saw the irony. But their rift went back a lot longer than three months, and what I knew of it only scratched the surface.
“I think he just needs some time,” I offered. “It was unexpected, you know?” His gaze met mine, and I shrugged. “All of it.”
It wasn’t an explanation exactly, but it was the truth. About a lot of things still lingering between us.
“I hadn’t expected you to end things with us,” he said, the words almost cautious, like he didn’t know if now was the time to say them, but also, what other time would there be? “I spent a long time wondering why you did.”
“Me too,” I said honestly. “For a while, I thought of you as the one who got away.”
“Not anymore?”
I shook my head.
The corners of his mouth lifted. “Me neither.”
I found myself smiling, and my next words came out easily. “Congratulations, by the way. About your marriage and the baby. I’m happy for you.”
His grin had always been contagious, but this one could power a small country. “Thanks. I guess I owe you for breaking up with me.”
I chuckled as something seemed to lift around us, the shadow of it blowing away, leaving me lighter and more hopeful than when I’d gotten here this morning.
His phone rang in his pocket. “Oh, it’s Steph,” he said as he pulled it out. He hurried to answer. “Hey, hon. You done?”
Marcus, one of the staff volunteers, walked through the lobby doors, and I waved him over, pointing at the boxes behind me. He grabbed one and headed out to his car. I leaned down for another.
“Wait, now?”
I paused at the shift in Alec’s voice. His skin had gone pale, the fingers of his free hand clutched in his hair, making it stick up left and right.
“Are you sure? You—Okay. Okay, yeah. Which hospital?”
That had me standing, the box forgotten.
He hung up a moment later, disbelief and a little panic in his features. “Stephanie’s water broke.” His eyes met mine, quickly filling with tears as he burst into a smile.
My concern swept into joy, a breath of relief escaping my chest as my own smile spread.
“Her friend’s taking her to Philly Memorial,” he said, his hand dropping from his head as he spun, frantically searching the lobby. “I need to meet her there. I should…where?—”
“My car’s right out front. I’ll take you,” I volunteered.
“I don’t know where the hospital is?—”
“I do.”
Marcus came back for another box, and I asked him to finish up without me, then grabbed my purse and fished out my keys. I tossed a look at Alec, who was still scanning the lobby with wide eyes.
“Let’s go, soon-to-be Dad.”
He froze, shoulders dropping as if those words made it sink in. A grin flooded his face, and we hurried to my car.
Ten minutes later, I pulled in front of the hospital entrance. Alec was out of the car before I’d even fully stopped, rushing for the doors. He slid to a stop just before he reached them, spun on his heel, and ran back to where I idled. I rolled down the passenger window.
“Thank you,” he said, a little out of breath.
I tilted my chin. “Now you owe me twice.”
He smiled and dropped his gaze, then returned it to me. “About Jase.”
My heart kicked in my chest as I tightened my grip on the steering, unsure of what Alec might say next.
No matter the closure it seemed we’d gotten, my dating his older brother could still be hugely awkward for him, and as lovely as Stephanie had been to me last night, I had no idea how she felt about the whole thing. She could hate it. Hate me.
I had a feeling their parents would take Alec’s side over Jase’s every time, and if that was the case, I didn’t know what it meant for Jase and me. And that was only if Jase didn’t decide to end things on his own first.
But all Alec said was, “I want you both to be happy. That’s it.”
My throat closed up at the sincerity of his words.
I was lucky, I realized, so lucky to have this man as my ex. To have experienced love for the first time from someone so willing to give it. There was a lot I’d built up about Alec in my mind over the years, the fantasy I’d created in my self-doubt and loneliness, but this much remained true: he was a good man. Just not the right one for me.
With that, he tapped the car’s windowsill and ran inside to his growing family.
Not letting myself think too much about it, I dug my phone from my purse and typed out a text.
Me: Congrats. You’re about to become an uncle.
I added the name of the hospital and hit send. Something told me Alec wouldn’t remember to let everyone know right away, and Stephanie was a little busy. But Jase would want to be a part of this.
With him in mind, along with Alec’s words, I put the car in drive. Project Runway could wait. I had another stop to make first.