Chapter 30 #4
I mindlessly twist her hair around my finger.
"He kept this place a secret from me my whole life.
You know better than anyone. I always wished I'd had cousins and grandparents growing up.
Being an only child wasn't ideal. Sure, I found my mom in high school, but she was twelve years too late with a poor excuse that she believed justified the abandonment of her son.
I think if I can get my dad here, if he could step on the earth he was raised on, and smell the dusty warmth that permeates the pastures in the summer and the crisp, cool air in the fall it would go a long way.
He once called this place home. If a white lie gets him here and I can bring my family back together, it's worth it. "
"Having Fish call and tell him there's been an accident might backfire. He could have a heart attack," she points out.
"That's a valid point," I say as I stare at the ceiling in thought.
"What if, instead, he calls and tells him you haven't come home?
You and Titan rode out to check the property, and you haven't returned.
It's enough to make him worry without him jumping to the absolute worst-case scenario.
Plus, if you're missing on Hale land, I bet his mind would instantly drift to the places he used to go.
I bet he'd start thinking of all the places he'd look first."
"You're fucking brilliant. It's one of the many reasons I love you."
"I still wish there was a way to get him here without lying."
"Me too, but I feel like something big needs to happen to end the war. My dad doesn't know Trigg's story—who his mother is and how everything went down. It's a conversation that needs to happen in person."
Her eyes look distant as she stares at the fire I started in the fireplace, and I hate it. I understand why she hates lies. I hate them too. "Hey, I can think of something else if this is going to upset you that much."
"No." She shakes her head. "It's not that. I was just thinking."
"About?" I question as I pull her closer.
"Us, this property, the future, all of it…" she draws off nervously, and I am reminded of why I brought her here at all. The words I fumbled giving her earlier—and then not at all after she seduced me to this floor. "I have something I need to tell you," she says softly.
"And I have something I need to ask you."
"You go first," she says, pulling in a shaky breath.
That has to be it. The reason for her anxiety. I told her I wanted to build a life with her here on my family's land, but I never asked her the big question. The one that ties her to me for eternity. The one where she takes my last name.
"You knew from the start, from the very first day when I begged and pleaded for my father not to take you fishing, that I'd love you.
You knew I'd fall for your beautiful soul.
I loved you as my best friend, as my fishing partner…
until I loved you as more." I watch as her eyes well with tears.
The direction of my words is clear. "I loved you when I didn't know what love was, and I loved you when I was scared to feel it.
This may not be the spot where our story began, but I'd love for it to be the spot where it ends.
La ney Hart, would you make a man out of this lost boy and be my wife? "
Tears flow freely down her cheeks as silence hangs between us. Her eyes search my face as the question waits patiently to be answered. Ten seconds. Twenty. Thirty.
She closes her eyes, and my anxiety spikes. She wouldn't say no, would she?
Her eyes pop open, and her face transforms with joy. "London Hale, I've wanted to marry you since the first time I saw you. I want nothing more than to take your last name and make it mine."
I close the distance between our mouths, and a new hunger forms. Every day with her is better than the last, but hearing her confirm she wants forever is a new level.
Her fingers tangle in my hair as she seeks to deepen our kiss, two people discovering a new fire.
The world melts away the way it always does when I'm with her, and for long moments, I get to experience a slice of heaven on earth where all is right in the world because the only girl I've ever wanted said yes.
When our lips finally part, she lays her forehead against mine, breathless, her heart racing. I ask for one more thing. "What would you say if I asked you to go down to the courthouse and marry me right now?"
"It's the middle of the night. They're closed."
"You know what I mean. If we wake up first thing tomorrow morning, would you get on the back of my bike and let me take you downtown to get married?"
"Easy cowboy, I haven't finished judging all of your questionable life choices," she jests, swatting my chest, and it feels like a stall.
"Is that a no?"
"It's a maybe," she says, rolling her lips, and I deflate.
"Not because I don't want to marry you, but because when I pictured getting married, I saw myself having a wedding with our closest friends and family.
Sydney, Fisher, Asha, Trigg, and our parents…
th ey're all part of our story. I wouldn't want to hastily make a decision that didn't include the people I love most and hurt them.
" Her fingers find my chin, and she tips my face toward hers until she has my full attention.
"You know I'd marry you in a heartbeat. I love you, but they love us too, and I don't want to have any regrets. "
The word 'yes' had barely finished forming on her lips when my world tilted sideways. For one perfect, crystalline moment, I had everything I wanted. The future spread out before us the way we'd always planned.
I had thought the truth I finally gave her would be enough. The carefully curated version of events that let me keep her while salving my conscience. I thought it was complete, thought it was sufficient, thought it would hold the weight of forever.
But lying here, watching her eyes light up as she describes the wedding she's dreamed of, I understand with devastating clarity how wrong I was. The truth wasn't enough. It never could have been.
Because it wasn't really the truth at all.