35. Chapter Thirty-Five
Chapter Thirty-Five
Jax
I hate hospital waiting rooms.
They always smell like antibacterial soap and bad memories.
That scent alone is enough to mess with my head.
It yanks me straight back to being a kid, stuck next to Mum in some stiff plastic chair, waiting for Dad to get discharged.
It was always something stupid. Just a few stitches, but it would take hours .
If he’d just stayed out of the bloody pub, he wouldn’t have needed them in the first place.
I try to distract myself, thumbing through the band group chat, but everyone’s busy recording. No new messages.
With a loud sigh, I shove my phone back into my pocket. That’s when I catch some movement from the corner of my eye. Allie’s door opens, and Trevor steps out, dragging a hand through his hair, blowing out a breath, and he starts walking in my direction.
I drop my eyes to the floor, pretending I didn’t see him in hopes he’ll just keep walking.
No such luck.
He slows to a stop right in front of me, then nods toward the empty seat next to mine.
“Mind if I sit?”
His tone’s hard to read—calm, but there’s definitely something simmering underneath. If I had to guess, based on the three whole minutes we’ve spent in the same room, I’d say he’s pissed. Which, I guess is fair.
It must be royally disappointing to find the woman you once cared for being loved by someone who will actually show her what she deserves.
Not.
I shrug. “No worries.”
He sinks into the chair with a long exhale, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees.
“Look, it’s nothing personal,” he says, scratching the back of his head. “I just didn’t know Allie was seeing someone. It caught me off guard.”
“Yeah, I get that,” I reply, not sure what else there is to say.
I’ve never really done the whole awkward-run-into-the-ex thing. Emelia was my first girlfriend, and I was hers. So, yeah, this is all uncharted territory for me.
Trevor shifts in his seat and glances over at me, one brow raised. “How is this all supposed to work with you being… well, you?”
I let out a short laugh. “We haven’t really figured that part out yet,” I admit. “But if you’re worried about the partying thing, it’s honestly not as wild as people make it out to be.”
He doesn’t say anything, just keeps watching me like he’s waiting for me to slip up.
“I mean, yeah, we tour and play shows and all that, but it’s not all parties and everything. Most nights it’s just rehearse, play, crash. Rinse and repeat. There’s not a lot of energy left for partying these days, at least not for me.”
“You don’t get tempted?” he asks, like he’s digging for something.
I shake my head. “Not really, man. That’s not what I’m about. I just want to make music that means something. Stuff people actually feel, you know?”
He’s quiet after that, just kind of staring ahead like he’s trying to figure out if he believes me, but I’m not lying. I’ve never cared about being the stereotypical frontman. I just want to create music that hits people the way it hit me when I needed it most.
Eventually, he turns to face me again. “Okay. So let’s say you and Allie get serious. What happens when you’re on tour? What’s the plan then?”
The way he says if makes my jaw clench. Like he’s already written us off. I shift in my seat, suddenly hyper-aware of how uncomfortable these plastic chairs are.
“We don’t know yet,” I say with a shrug. “We’d definitely have space on the bus if she ever wanted to come. But yeah, that’s a ‘figure it out when we get there’ kind of thing.”
Trevor lets out a short huff, and something in his face shifts. He’s still looking at me, like he wants to say something but isn’t sure how. Or maybe he just doesn’t want to. I don’t know if I said the wrong thing or if this is just classic Trevor. Although, my money’s on the second one.
“Alright,” he says finally, nodding toward someone behind him. A woman—his girlfriend, I’m guessing—starts walking over. Then he turns back to me. “I told Allie that since the girls have already met Marissa, it’s only fair you get a chance too. If you wanna go in, I’m okay with it.”
I nod once. “Thanks,” I say, standing up and giving him the most neutral smile I can muster.
The whole walk to Allie’s room feels oddly long, probably because my head’s still spinning from his little interrogation. And now I’ve gotta pull it together, because I’m about to meet her daughters.
No pressure or anything.
I take a deep breath at the door, then give it a light knock before slowly pushing it open.
The first thing I see is Allie, resting her chin gently on her youngest daughter’s head with her oldest coloring beside her. They all have the same shade of auburn hair, like someone hit copy and paste three times. It makes my heart squeeze.
Allie lifts her head when she sees me. Our eyes meet, and she gives me a soft, welcoming smile, but she doesn’t move. Just stays there, holding Lydia close.
“Hi,” she whispers.
“Hey,” I whisper back, my lips twitching into a small smile.
I inch closer, careful not to wake Lydia, who’s fast asleep in her mum’s arms. When I reach the chair by the bed, Charlotte whips around, and for a second, I forget how to breathe.
She looks exactly like Allie. Same big, ocean-blue eyes, same round cheeks. The only difference is her hair. It’s lighter, more like a strawberry blonde, and straight. But that face? She’s definitely a mini Allie.
Charlotte stares up at me with wide, cautious eyes while I ease into the chair next to the bed. I offer her a gentle, friendly smile.
“Hi there,” I say quietly. “You must be Charlotte.”
She glances at Allie, like she’s checking if I’m safe. Allie gives her a little nod, brushing her hair back.
“It’s okay, baby,” she says. “He’s a friend. You can say hi.”
Charlotte lights up like someone flipped a switch. “Hi! I’m Charlotte, and I’m five years old!” she says proudly, holding up all five fingers.
Allie laughs next to her. “She loves making sure everyone knows exactly how old she is. Right, Charlie?”
At the sound of the voices, Lydia starts to stir. She yawns, blinking up at me with the most confused little face I’ve ever seen.
“You must be Lydia,” I say gently, keeping my voice soft and calm like I did with Charlotte, even though I’m definitely sweating.
She just stares at me for a second, then leans back into Allie. Not impressed in the slightest.
Allie grins down at her. “She doesn’t talk much,” she says, chuckling a little. “Don’t take it personally.”
I hold up my hands. “No worries,” I reply with a smile. Then I lean forward slightly and add, “I’m not much of a talker either, Lydia. I get it.”
We end up sitting there for a while, an hour at least, and somehow, I get completely pulled into their little world. And it’s… incredible .
In that hour, I learn that Lydia’s a literal puzzle master.
She can apparently sit with one forever, no help needed.
She hates wearing shoes, prefers to be barefoot, and she’s usually shy around new people.
Which makes it even crazier that she’s now quietly curled up in my lap, twirling my phone in her hands like it’s the most normal thing in the world.
No warning. She just walked over and climbed up like it was her usual spot.
Then there’s Charlotte, who is absolutely brilliant. I don’t know much about kids, but the way she talks? I swear she could put some adults to shame.
She’s obsessed with the color pink, loves animals, and already knows she wants to be a vet when she grows up, taking after her mum with wanting to take care of everyone around her.
I glance up at Allie and catch her watching me with this soft smile, and I swear, I’ve never felt this kind of peace before. All this love in one little room? There’s nothing like it.
“Do you have to go back to the studio today?” she asks, running her fingers gently through Charlotte’s hair.
I shake my head. “Not for today. We’ve got plenty of time to finish up the record, and the guys have it handled.”
She smiles and leans down to kiss the top of Charlotte’s head just when a knock hits the door, and in walks Trevor.
He stops in the doorway, eyes sweeping across the room before landing on Lydia, still snuggled in my lap. Then his jaw tenses.
“Sorry to interrupt,” he says, voice flat, “but I’ve got work in the morning, so we need to head back.”
“I wanna stay with Mommy,” Charlotte pouts, quickly laying her head on Allie’s stomach. I catch the tiny wince of pain on Allie’s face, but she doesn’t say anything. Just swallows past it.
“I know, Charlie. But Mom needs rest,” Trevor says while he grabs her coloring book from the bed and sets it on the empty chair.
“It’s okay, sweetie,” Allie tells her with a half smile that I know is a mask. “You go with Daddy, and I’ll call you tonight, okay?”
Then Trevor steps in front of me and scoops Lydia right off my lap. She lets out this little frustrated whine, but he just shifts her onto his hip and carefully takes my phone out of her hands. He holds it out to me with this tight, forced expression.
I take it and slip it into my pocket, hoping it’ll help her settle—but it doesn’t. Her arms stay stretched out, and my heart just sinks watching how neither of them want to leave, and I can’t do a bloody thing.
“Charlotte, give Mom a hug. Time to go,” Trevor says, already moving toward the door.
Charlotte clings to Allie, wrapping her arms around her with her eyes shining with tears, and I can tell she’s trying so hard to be brave. Eventually, she pulls away and slides off the bed.
She walks past me, but then pauses, spins around, and throws her arms around my waist.
I hug her back gently, my voice low. “Bye, Charlotte. I’ll see you again soon, okay?”
She pulls back with a small nod, her eyes on the floor—and I swear, that look crushes me more than I expected.
The second the door clicks shut, Allie lets out this deep breath and sinks back against the bed. I’m already moving, sliding in beside her. She’s staring up at the ceiling, blinking fast, trying not to let the tears fall. But I know that look.
I wrap my arms around her, pulling her close while she curls into me.
“It’s okay, love,” I murmur, kissing the top of her head. “You’ll be back with them before you know it.”
“I know,” she whispers, her voice cracking. “It’s just… hard. I hate that they had to see me like this.” She glances down at the wires and monitors hooked up to her.
“I think they were just happy to see you.” I run my hands slowly along her arms, and she breathes out slowly, nodding.
“I’m glad you got to meet them.”
“They’re amazing.” I hold her a little tighter and smile into her hair.
The truth is, I was terrified to meet them. Not because they’re kids, but because if they didn’t feel comfortable around me, I would’ve taken that step back in a heartbeat. Her girls will always come first. Always .
Trevor? He can get over it. But the girls—they’re her entire world. I’d never get in the way of that.
But the fact that they warmed up to me so fast? That just made one thing extremely clear.
We’ve gotta figure this out. And soon.