14. Maeve
14
MAEVE
“ A nd who are you?” I ask, looking the man up and down. He’s a bear shifter, and at least three times my weight. His hazel eyes are guarded, and with the thick beard he’s sporting, it wouldn’t surprise me if he was a serial killer.
A hipster one, sure, with the long, thin blonde hair that’s tied up in a knot at the top of his head. But a serial killer nonetheless.
He’s got a blank expression on his face, but I can smell his frustration at being here.
That’s interesting.
He’s mated—to a wolf. Her cherry scent is entwined with his own earthy one. A hint of sweetness to counteract what is absolutely a grumpy, dickheadish bear.
“You’re alone. I was told you’d have a friend with you,” the bear counters with a frown. He’s got a very gravelly voice, with a strong accent. I wonder if all the people here sound the same way. I think it could grow on me.
“Your information is clearly incorrect, then, because I don’t have friends,” I say, rolling my eyes. “Now, who are you?”
“Orson Barnes, second to the alpha of the Phoenix Pride,” he says with a haughty look that only makes him seem constipated. “Maeve Quinn?”
“Just Maeve,” I say, giving him a true haughty look. “Since your information is clearly outdated, I want to make one thing clear: you do not get to touch me.”
He sneers. “Wouldn’t want to.”
“Glad we’ve cleared that up. Now, then, can we be off or are you going to keep us out here in the open for much longer? I am pretty rare, you know.”
Orson’s jaw clenches, and I can almost hear the thoughts he’s wisely keeping to himself. “Let’s go.”
He reaches for my luggage, but I tug it away from him and follow him across the platform. It’s pretty open out here, and my nerves are already sky high from the letter I received.
Inside what should’ve been my guarded home.
The dock creaks beneath my feet as I step off the platform, and I barely have time to register the sound before a loud, guttural roar penetrates through my anxious mind.
My senses go on high alert, my chromius letting out a loud whine, as I scan the area. I can’t see anything, but someone is clearly out there.
The roar was that of a lion, I think, but surely, there’s not one here this close to the Phoenix Pride and the alpha lion that resides within.
Orson’s massive frame tenses beside me, his head snapping in a direction that I’m presuming the noise came from. My hands start trembling, and a cold sweat breaks out across my skin as I pull my suitcase to my side. I wish I could run or move, but I’m frozen in place, the fear gripping me tight like a vice.
A classic freeze, instead of being a smart bitch who can flee .
“Move,” Orson snarls before letting out a roar of his own.
But unfortunately for the domineering bear shifter, I cannot.
There’s another roar, almost identical to the first, and Orson grabs my suitcase from me, throwing it over to the car. It hurls through the air faster than my eyes can track and lands next to the back left tire.
I shriek as bullets fly through the air, my heart racing with each one that hits the car.
Orson roughly grabs my arm, and the moment his hand closes around me, a wave of revulsion hits me. My skin crawls where his fingers press into me, every nerve screaming at the intrusion.
I yank back, instinctively, but his grip tightens, and bile rises in my throat. My vision fades in and out of focus, every muscle in my body locking up in protest.
I can’t breathe, can’t think, can’t move. I need him to get off me.
My chromius whimpers— or maybe I do— as Orson tugs me to the ground before jumping up on top of the cargo boxes.
He charges forward, shifting mid-stride into an enormous, hulking bear. His thick fur bristles with power, his claws tearing into the wooden boards as he barrels towards where the hunters await.
My chest heaves, my breath coming in short, panicked gasps as I try to make sense of what’s happening. The wooden box is pressed against my knees, making everything so much harder.
I sit, frozen, every muscle in my body taut with anxiety. I can’t tear my eyes away from the scene in front of me, even as the bear’s fur tinges with red. I’m no stranger to violence, not even a stranger to murder.
But this… this is something I’ve never seen before.
My stomach churns, a clammy sweat soaking through my clothes, my eyes stinging, but I can’t look away. I can’t even blink to protect myself from the horrors.
There’s three hunters banded together, trying to attack Orson, but he doesn’t slow down, even as he takes a bullet. They’re shouting, but their words are indistinct over the roar of my boat’s engine and the pounding in my ears.
It doesn’t matter what they’re saying, though.
They’re dead now.
One after another, Orson hasn’t hesitated in taking them out. Their weapons are no match for his teeth and claws.
This attack was over in seconds, the air tinged with a copper smell, as Orson shifts back into his human form. There’s a graze across his left forearm, where one of the bullets must’ve hit, but that’s the only mark he has on him.
His hazel eyes are blazing with a mixture of rage and something darker—something more primal. He stalks forward, glancing at me.
“Let’s go,” he growls, his gravelly voice even rougher than before.
I can’t argue, even though my body screams at me to put as much distance between us as possible. I can still feel the cold, sticky sensation of the wet, wooden box against my skin, the nauseating memory of a flashback lurking at the edges of my consciousness, blurring the lines between now and then.
But I shove my emotions into that dark corner, along with my chromius.
I just need to get through this meeting with the alpha, and then I can break down.
I’m so fucking close to my freedom.
So close.
So it’s time to play the part Adrian expects of me.
Orson moves closer to me, and as he jumps back up on the wooden cargo boxes, I know this is my chance. It’s petty and won’t actually fix anything, but it’ll make me feel better.
My hand slips into my pocket, my fingers closing around the small, concealed taser I carry around just in case.
I don’t have a shifted form to protect myself, and we all know men don’t listen to the word no.
With a swift motion, I pull it out and press in the button, the air crackling with the electricity as Orson lets out a shocked grunt. He falls forward to his knees, his throat making a weird gurgling sound.
Hm. I kind of hoped for a bigger reaction.
It only takes a second for the bear to rip the prongs from his chest and for him to grunt at me.
His eyes, now tinged with fury, flick up to meet mine. “What the hell—” he begins, his voice a low, dangerous rumble, but I cut him off.
“I’m not yours to manhandle, Orson.” My voice is steady, cold, even, as my insides tremble with residual fear.
For a moment, we stare each other down, the tension thick between us. Finally, he lets out a low growl and rises to his feet.
“I won’t forget that,” he spits out, the words dripping with his annoyance.
“Let’s hope the reminder sticks, and you learn to keep your hands to yourself,” I hiss back.
Without waiting for a response, I turn and start walking towards the car. I leave my suitcase for him to handle, since he threw it over here.
My hands are still shaking, but I force myself to keep moving, to not look back. I need to stay focused. I need to stay calm.
The adrenaline is still coursing through my veins, but I can’t let it cloud my judgement.
I’m so close. Just a little further, and I’ll be free.
“ A re you okay?” Orson asks, his hands firmly on the wheel in the ten and two position. His knuckles are white from the strength of his grip, and whilst he’s trying to sound calm, he’s clearly agitated.
I turn my head away and look out the window, taking small, even breaths to try and remain calm.
“Maeve?” His tone hardens as if I’m causing him issues by not responding.
But what does he want me to say?
That, no, I’m not okay because my skin is still crawling from where he touched me?
That, no, I’m not okay because I saw dead people for the first time in years?
That, no, I’m not okay because I saw him murder people on my behalf?
That, no, my heart palpitations are still at dangerous levels because he decided to violate the one rule I told him not to break?
Or even worse, that, no, I’m not okay because after touching me, my bare skin touched a random, wet wooden box that sent me into a horrific flashback?
“Maeve, I told you I was sorry, but I needed to keep you alive, and moving you was the only way I could do that,” he says, annoyance lacing his tone.
Because my needs are only worth meeting as long as they don’t interfere with someone else’s.
It’s always been that way.
The rest of the journey is silent. Orson doesn’t try to look at me again, never mind try to speak to me. It’s for the best. I needed to use the drive to calm myself down, so I can be as presentable as I can when facing my new alpha.
Can’t have Atticus Phoenix tattling to Adrian about what a mess I am on the first fucking day.
We pull up to a gate, and he inputs a code before continuing up a long driveway. The house in front of us is huge and beautiful, and it’s obvious that this is where the alpha lives.
It’s kind of laughable that he has a fenced-off property, as if it would really stop any shifter, but it does add to the aesthetic. Orson stops the engine and mutters for me to leave my bag in the car before getting out.
Smart man, not trying to come and open my door for me.
Orson opens the front door, maintaining a good distance from me, which is pretty smart after what happened down at the docks. I’m barely holding onto myself because I know this is my only chance to get out of Adrian’s hold.
I can’t go crying about how people have already fucked it up for me before I even arrived.
I won’t do that to myself.
I step through the doorway, my eyes taking in the stunning foyer, before landing on the attractive couple at the bottom of the stairs. The girl is tiny, maybe my age, although she definitely looks younger.
She’s beautiful, with thick brown hair that reaches her waist, and dark brown eyes that seem kind. She’s quite thin, but has a warm glow surrounding her.
Right at her side, with a hand on her lower back, is Alpha Atticus Phoenix himself. He’s well over six foot, his mate not even reaching the middle of his chest, with dirty blonde wavy hair. With broad shoulders, high cheekbones, and neatly shaved facial hair, I’d believe he made his millions from modelling.
He exudes power, his lion prowling just underneath the surface, so much that my chromius isn’t unsettled. It’s impressive and exactly what I expected.
“Alpha Phoenix,” Orson says, stepping in behind me, gently closing the door. My heart races as his shadow appears just in front of me. I know he’s not close, but I can still feel his touch searing into my skin.
“Are you okay?” Atticus’s and Orson’s mate asks, her voice soft and gentle, as the concern pours off of her.
But I won’t let her bear shifter mate pretend that he is the one who was wronged. Sure, he got a graze from a bullet, but it’s me who is the true victim.
“Yes, Mr Barnes. Are you okay?” I ask, turning towards the bear shifter with a dangerous smirk. I’m the one standing here barely holding onto myself.
This dickhead gets no fucking pity from me.
“What happened?” Alpha Phoenix demands, his words sending a tingle down my spine.
“Dangerous and Deadly over here thought it would be prudent to tase me,” Orson says, rolling his shirt up so we can see the tiny red marks on his chest.
I’ve got no shame in my actions. It was my petty revenge so that, at the very least, as I spend the entire night reliving what he—and they— did to me, I can at least remind myself that I got my own back.
That I’m no longer a helpless victim.
“Yes, well, that’s what happens when you’re—” I start, annoyance dripping from my words.
But the tiny wolf shifter cuts me off with a snarl, a powerful glare on her face. I’m not here to cause issues with the one woman who could get me kicked out of the pack, so I’ll have to play nice with the Queen of the Pride.
“Meet my mate, Nora Hart,” Alpha Phoenix says, the prideful tone hard to miss. “She’s also Orson’s mate here.”
“You should teach your mate better manners,” I say, directing my words towards the wolf. I’m not a fool, and it’s clear who has the power in this little parlour. “He tried to touch me, despite me repeatedly telling your alpha that wouldn’t be allowed. I even reminded the bear upon pick up about my… preferences .”
Orson sighs, shaking his head, as if my pain is nothing to him. As if, once more, I’m nothing but an inconvenience.
“There were three men at the docks waiting. I had to touch her to move her so I could make sure she was covered whilst the team handled it.”
But what he doesn’t care to understand is that I’d rather let those hunters kill me, knowing I won’t ever need to live another moment like this… than have his touchy brand of protection.
Nora gasps, fear filling her brown eyes as she looks me over for injuries. “Are you okay?”
That’s a question I’ve never been asked whilst the questioner is expecting a truthful answer.
“I’m fine,” I reply. Her eyes dim at the brush off, and as she steps closer to me, I try to make her forget about it. “Honestly, it was quite thrilling. I’ve not seen a dead body in a while, and whilst I certainly would’ve added one of the inappropriate team members to the pile, it was an adequate fight.”
Do they see the trembling of my hands? Can they smell my panic? My words taste sour, my stomach clenching.
“I… right.” Her tone is confused, her hand falling to her stomach as if to reassure herself.
Pregnant, then. That’s nice.
The pit in my stomach grows, and I plaster a smile on my face. “I’m Maeve.”
“Well, Atty introduced me, but I’m Nora.” She grins back at me, reaching out with her hand before gasping and yanking it towards herself so quickly she nearly falls. Panic is etched into her face, an apology in her words. “Shit, sorry. I swear, I’m not usually this stupid.”
“Pregnancy brain?” I ask, trying to keep my tone light and nice. I can be nice, right?
The bear is clearly a fucking cunt, but she seems sweet, and I will do anything to keep this conversation nice and pleasant. I can’t deal with being kicked back to the compound, especially since Atticus Phoenix had the most promising place out of the contenders.
And, fuck me, if I’m kicked out of the pride on day one , Adrian likely won’t let me see daylight until I mate with his nephew and accept my place in his chess game of life.
“You know what, let’s go with that.” Nora laughs, but I can still see her unease about her mistake.
The thing is, I can respect her for stopping herself. Shaking hands is a common introduction, and it’s the least touch-heavy interaction we could’ve had as shifters. But she pulled back. She realised.
She corrected the behaviour and didn’t try to shame me for it.
Tears prick at my eyes as I realise she’s the first person to truly respect my boundaries without acting as if she’s doing me a favour.
“So, where is this security team?” I ask, changing the subject so that I can get more control of myself. “I’m not approving any creeps.”
“Who was creepy down at the pick up?” Nora asks, confused.
Is she not including her mate here? Probably not.
“One of them wolf-whistled,” Orson says, pinching the bridge of his nose as he breaks from his conversation with the alpha. “It’ll be handled.”
We had to make a stop with the enforcers as we entered the pride’s property limits, and as Orson rolled our windows down, one of them whistled at me, winking and suggestively messing with his eyebrows.
It’s disgusting as fuck for the panther shifter to think I’d sully myself with someone as unrefined as him. But it was absolutely disrespectful to Orson, the second in the pride, for this guard to act that way when I’m clearly a guest of his or the alphas’.
Adrian would never accept behaviour like that from any of his staff. It’s interesting that Atticus does.
“See that it is.” I toss my hair over my shoulder and roll my eyes as I try to keep the friendly aura alive with Nora. “What did he expect? That I’d go running like some dog?”
Nora snorts and explains about my security team. “Last time Atty did this, he brought in a bunch of people, and you can dismiss anyone you want. My friend, Ari, is a rare elephant shifter and needs guards at the moment.”
But I don’t care about the security team. I can only focus on the words rare elephant shifter. Tingles race across my body as my eyes widen.
An elephant?
Like an actual elephant?
I so badly want to meet this shifter. I’ve never met an elephant before. Hell, I’m excited about the lion in front of me, never mind an elephant .
These are the kinds of animals I’ve only ever heard about or read in stories. But now I’m here, and they’re real, and I’ll actually get the chance to interact with them.
“You have an elephant here? Like a real one?” I ask, keeping my tone as steady as I can. Atticus’s lips curve up in some semblance of a smile as Nora eagerly nods her head.
“Looks like you’re not the only one who is excited to learn more about the shifters we have here,” Orson says, smiling at his mate.
It seems that I didn’t keep my excitement as contained as I’d have liked. I wouldn’t have cared, except I don’t like that he has anything to hold over me.
Asshole.
I hold back my sneer, though, so I don’t upset his pregnant mate. I’m not an idiot, even if he is.
“I’m aware you need protection,” Alpha Phoenix says with a frown as he turns to me. “However, I wasn’t quite ready for you to be here, so it’s not yet organised. You’ll be staying here tonight whilst we ready the security team.”
“Oh, I’d really rather not,” I say, shaking my head. This house, whilst pretty, puts me on edge, and I really do not want to be close to Mr Handsy and my alpha whilst I panic over my new surroundings.
The flashback earlier was rough, and the only thing that helped was the medication I had taken on the boat. It’s dulling some of the harsher feelings, but I know that it’ll wear off soon.
“I can understand your distaste for that, Maeve, but we need to maintain your safety. During your trial period, you will be escorted everywhere by a security team. Once you are settled here, we’d adjust that—but there were people at the pickup point waiting to strike. We do not budge on safety,” Alpha Phoenix lectures.
It’s like he’s rehearsed these lines in the mirror, and it actually pisses me off so badly at the lack of effort he’s put in.
“Could she stay with Ari tonight?” Nora asks, begging her mate and my alpha.
To my surprise, he tilts his head, considering her request.
That sends red flags my way. “Who is Ari?”
“She’s the elephant shifter,” Nora says.
I nod, trying to hide my excitement. “Permitted they have the space and do not touch me, breathe on me, or?—”
“I’m sure they’ll not want to get that close to you,” Orson mutters a little too bitterly for my liking.
He did.
Regardless of my feelings.
Doesn’t he understand that I would rather die than have another man touch me without my permission? And yet… he found himself above that little rule.
Everyone always has a reason, and it’s always more important than my reason to not do it in the first place.
“I’ll speak to Alvie about it,” Alpha Phoenix says. “Ari knows a few things about mythicals, too, so I feel that will work out for you both.”
“She does? Like what?” I frown, not liking the sound of that. We’re pretty reclusive, and as much as she’s rare, she’s still a common animal.
Please, please, tell me she’s got nothing to do with Adrian.
“I’ll let her tell you,” Nora says before her brows draw together. “Do you know Tarun Graves?”
“That pompous-headed fake elephant?” I ask with a scoff as I think about another one of Adrian’s pathetic nephews that I’ve met. He’s even worse than Julian.
Tarun Graves is the most pompous, pig-headed, brutish man I’ve ever come across. He’s never had a single day in his life where someone hasn’t fawned over him or let him believe he’s god’s gift to this earth.
He’s got his head so far up the Tribunal’s ass that he could recite their fucking bylaws in his sleep.
He’s a joke, but, of course, he’s the apple of Adrian’s fucking eyes.
I hate the prick, and the one night we shared under the same roof was enough for me to want to poison him at the dinner table and watch him finally put all those etiquette lessons he’s clearly had since being a toddler to shame.
Then again, the prick would probably excuse himself before dying in the morgue, just to spite me.
He’s a fake elephant shifter, and yet, somehow thinks he’s better than them because he’s a mythical creature. As if everyone at that dinner table wasn’t also a mythical creature.
The Graves family are full of people I want dead, and whilst Tarun has never done anything to me personally, I’d wipe him off the Earth just because I could.
Nora rubs her hands together as if this is the best news she’s heard all day, and I make a mental note to touch base with her and find out what she knows. “You and her will get along amazingly.”
Atticus and Orson excuse themselves to go arrange my stay with Ari, and I follow Nora into her kitchen.
She grabs some brownies from her fridge and offers them out. My heat might’ve ended two days ago, but the hormones have me still craving chocolate and sugar, so I eagerly take one.
It’s always the hormones, just accept that.
“These are excellent,” I say, reaching out for a second one.
“Orson made them. They’re Ari’s favourite. I’ll get you a plate sorted,” Nora says, her words tumbling out in a nervous rush. She fidgets with the hem of her dress, unable to meet my eyes.
Whilst I don’t love eating something that the bear made, I’d be a fool to turn down delectable treats like this just to save my pride.
“I’m not a big fan of most people,” I say, giving her a wary look. “As in, if someone was dying in front of me, I’d probably stand back and watch rather than do something about it.”
No, the something I’d do is probably add more gasoline to the fire I definitely started. Men burned strong women at the stake because they couldn’t handle their brilliance.
I’d happily burn rapists for being as cowardly as those fuckers.
“Um, okay. That’s a little morbid, but we all have our preferences,” Nora says, reaching over to push the brownies closer to me. Smart woman, I’m definitely much nicer when devouring sugar.
I laugh. “But you seem nice, and I can tolerate that.”
“Right. Tolerable.” Nora shakes her head, giving me a small smile. “To be afraid of touch… you’re either mentally ill or something happened to you.”
My smile freezes in place as my blood cools. I raise an eyebrow. “Why can’t it be both?”
“Relatable.”
I narrow my eyes, not sure if she does actually relate, but Nora shrugs, an easygoing smile on her face. Her almost flippant attitude should be annoying, but it’s got an edge to it that only someone who has truly suffered can master.
“Six years ago, my fated mate rejected me, and I lost my wolf,” she says, and I’m fuelled with such deep anger my nerves are electrified.
“Asshole. Men are fucking trash.”
“Yeah, they are,” Nora says, her eyes trained on the plate of brownies in front of her. “It was my eighteenth birthday, and I lost everything. My mate, my family, my pack— my wolf. She couldn’t deal with the pain and retreated so far away that I was alone. I was depressed and couldn’t cope.”
“But now…?”
I hear the change in her tone, the confidence. “I pulled myself together all on my own. I might not have been happy, but I was alive. I was getting through the day, and it was a life of my own making.”
I don’t like it. Her story makes me feel uncomfortable.
She survived hell, and yet, she still managed to function?
What the fuck does that say about me?
I’m a pathetic mess.
Broken.
Filthy.
Disgusting.
I grab a brownie from the plate, and now, it’s me who avoids looking at her as I shovel chocolatey crumbs into my mouth to avoid having to speak to her.
“Until I met Atticus. He messed my life up in all of the worst ways, and as fate introduced each of my new mates, I lost myself further to the darkness. Eventually, I couldn’t fight the depression anymore and tried to kill myself.
“My wolf was the one to save me from that. Not my mates, although I have no doubt they would.” She looks up at me, and I dutifully avoid her gaze. “I’m happy now, Maeve. I’m finally fucking living and not just surviving. I’m happy, and it’s such a beautiful thing.”
Here she is happy, whole, and healthy, and what am I? A mess.
I wipe my tears before turning back to her. “How do you do that?”
“What?”
My chromius whines as our pain merges across our bond. “How do you see what I’ve managed to hide from the world?”
“It takes someone who has been through the darkness to recognise when someone else is fighting their own demons.”
I flinch and shove those emotions back in their shitty little box and give her a tight smile. “I think I’m content in my darkness for now.”
“Your battle is your own.” Nora slides off the stool and goes to grab some milk out of the fridge. She grins at me. “Want some? Brownies and milk are the best.”
I don’t know what to make of the girl who survived her own personal hell and clawed her way to being the queen of the most powerful pride in the country.
But I do think she’s a good ally to have.