Chapter 21
VIVIENNE
“All set for the road trip?” Sutton asks, poking her head through my bedroom door.
I freeze halfway through wrestling my overstuffed carry-on, only to be dismissed like this were a normal occurrence.
“Don’t worry about it. We’ve all been there,” the content creator assures with a shrug.
“Sutton means she’s been there…all would be an overgeneralization,” Evelyn adds as she leans against the doorframe.
The comment earns her a side-eye. “That is not how supportive friends talk to one another,” Sutton huffs.
“Supportive and real friends don’t lie,” Evelyn quips back.
“You’re right,” Sutton admits on a sigh. “It’s why I came here. Vivienne, with all due respect, my love, you’ve got massive bedhead, and are still in your pajamas while Nate’s waiting for you downstairs.”
My stomach drops at the realization that I’m late, and I run to the bathroom as both girls cackle their hearts out. From brushing my teeth to doing my hair and getting dressed, I’m walking back to my bedroom in nine minutes tops.
I freeze, unblinking when I catch Sutton suspiciously kicking at something under my bed while Evelyn closes my suitcase with a sharp zip.
“Do you think there’s going to be one bed?” Sutton fluffs my comforter, paying extra attention to where it meets the floor.
Evelyn dusts her hands with pride. “All we need is one room. If things go our way, no bed too big or too small is going to be a problem.”
My head tilts to the side, lips parting at the nonsense they’re spewing. “What are you guys talking about?”
Both girls jump at my intrusion, eyes wide like thieves caught stealing from a museum, and attempting to cover their tracks with cheap replicas.
“Are you excited for the conference?” Evelyn squeaks out the words nervously.
Sutton, on the other hand, recovers from her surprise quickly, expertly pulling the suitcase off my bed and rolling it in my direction. With an aggressive grip, she forces my hand around its handle and pushes me out.
“You’re all set to go! Now, I don’t recommend you step back in here. I’m pretty sure I saw a goose.”
My lips press into a thin line at the reminder of what happened that night. I was never going to live this down.
“On a serious note.” Evelyn emerges from my bedroom, back as her usual self. “How are you feeling about all of this?”
Scared. Nervous. Anxious. It’s all one big concoction of emotions.
A part of me is looking forward to seeing Nate again, but another doesn’t know what to expect when we haven’t talked in over a week. And the looming knowledge that I’ll be surrounded by the one thing I hate the most is also eating at me on the inside.
I barely survived Nate’s first showcase. God knows how this one will go. Will I be convincing as a fake fiancée under pressure? Will I run out of the place and be photographed by paparazzi again? There are so many questions unanswered.
But since these girls don’t know about that part of me yet, I settle on saying, “I’m just not sure what to expect at this conference.”
“I’ll tell you what to expect,” Sutton, the only person who’d know anything about this, proceeds to name everything with a sharp slice of her hand. “Hot men.” Slice. “Cool engineering.” Slice. “Cool planes.” Slice. “And big names in the industry like Carter Crawford.”
My eyes shoot up to hers in curiosity, skimming past everything she’s mentioned and focusing on that name. An eerie chill goes up my spine at the thought of him. From what Nate told me at the gym that day, he’s got bad news written all over him.
“Carter Crawford.” Evelyn quite literally swoons. “He is one good-looking man.”
“And how do you know about him?” I ask, genuinely puzzled.
Evelyn is not one to care for planes or engineering. It makes sense for Sutton to be engrossed in this world, given that it’s her passion, but Evelyn? The medical student who spends the majority of her time pulling all-nighters? Yeah. Not so much.
“He’s the talk of the town! And the girls are invested. He’s hot, with a capital H, and his face card goes hard. Naturally, compilations and thirst trap videos about him are being made of him. And suddenly, women are interested in aerospace engineering.”
“Odd,” I voice my thoughts out loud.
“Sure, whatever. Now go!” Sutton shoves me out of the apartment’s front door before poking her head out to look on either side. “Where’s your groom?” she asks at the sight of the empty hallway.
“I told him I’d meet him downstairs.”
Evelyn and Sutton turn to each other with a pointed look.
“That’s not very gentlemanly of him,” the first says.
“Agreed. That is neither husband nor fiancé material,” the second adds.
I ignore their comments, making my way toward the elevator with a final wave of my hand.
The truth is, I’m the one who insisted that Nate not come up.
We didn’t end on great terms following the kiss incident. Our car ride back from New Jersey to the city had been painfully tense, so I assumed our road trip to Chicago would be more of the same. I was just looking to avoid the inevitable for a little longer.
Nate’s brows perk up when he sees me walking out of the building—the trunk of his car open, and his phone sandwiched between his ear and shoulder. He mumbles a few more words before hanging up, grabbing the carry-on from my hand, and securing its place in the back.
A loud bang marks its closure, leaving us on opposite sides of his car, staring at each other.
Tired green eyes and obvious scruff growing on his face.
I’ve only ever seen him with facial hair when he’s stressed, and despite our avoidance of each other the past couple of weeks, I still want to know what he’s been up to.
What’s keeping him up at night? If he’s been thinking about me just as much as I have about him?
“Hi.” He breaks the silence first, his gaze carrying something I can’t put my finger on.
Longing? Regret? I shake the thought—it’s all in my head.
“Hey,” I reply softly, finding myself focused on his lips for a second too long. He seems to notice when his eyes drop to my own, but doesn’t mention it. “So…should we get going?”
He nods.
We’ve barely opened the doors when a shout stops us in our tracks. “Take care of our girl, okay?” A cascade of amber hair spills out the window as the girl clings to the ledge.
“She’s in good hands with me,” Nate shouts back.
A satisfied smile spreads across Sutton’s lips before she retreats. And the strange thing is, not a single part of me doubts his words.
Soon enough, we’re settled into the leather seats of his car, and with the rev of an engine, we’re off.
City streets fade behind us, replaced by open fields, farms, and eventually trees lining the highway. Orange. Yellow. Red. The autumn leaves serve as the perfect distraction from the deathly silence.
There's only one thing that could fix this—country music.
“Can I turn the radio on?” I ask just as Nate pipes in with, “When was the last time you drove?”
I turn to him in shock.
Two hours of driving have passed, with the wind whipping past the windows and the occasional honk from careless drivers being the only confirmation that we haven’t gone deaf. Why is he choosing to speak now?
His jaw clenches, and his hands tighten around the wheel as he senses my lingering gaze.
I’m tempted to give him a taste of his own medicine, but that doesn’t sit right with me.
Nate is putting in the effort to drive us all the way from New York City to Chicago—the least I could do is entertain him.
I fall back into my seat with a long sigh.
“Pretty sure I was eighteen. Both my parents had cars, and I’d borrow either depending on their schedules.
When they passed away”—tears sting my eyes, sharp with the weight of their absence—“and the reason behind the accident never came out, I realized there was a huge risk to all mundane things. So I’ve avoided driving since.
I inherited everything they had, but haven’t touched any of it. ”
Nate looks over at me with the same sadness as that night at his parents’ house. “What’s your favorite memory of them?”
My heart beats a little faster at the mention of my past, but it’ll do me some good.
I picked up my life and moved at the height of their death. I swore I wouldn’t dwell on what was and hoped avoidance would make me forget. Looking back at it, I couldn’t have been more wrong. A decade later and the wounds that should’ve healed into scars still feel like gashes.
“All my memories with them are favorites. Gossiping with my mom at any chance I could get. Crushing both my parents in long hugs whenever I was stressed out of my mind. Eating dinner with them every night. It was the simple things, really.”
“No siblings?”
I shake my head. “No extended family either. Both sets of grandparents died when I was young, and my parents were only children.”
“I’m sorry,” he says for the very first time.
“It is what it is.” I shrug. “I’m starting to think it’s one of the reasons I wanted to spend more time with yours.”
Nate’s shoulders tense before his eyes soften, agony and pain swirling behind them. “My family really does love you. They were asking why I didn’t bring you to dinner last Sunday.”
A warmth flares in my chest, but it’s quickly put out by the underlying meaning of his words. He could have pleased them and brought me along again, but he chose not to. And I can’t blame him for how much he values them.
“How’s your PhD project going now? Are things looking up?” He swiftly changes the subject, and I refrain from laughing cynically.
“Not really, but it’s okay…I guess.”
The more I think about it, the more I realize Arjun is every bit right.
Anyone else would have wrapped up this project by now, yet I’m still stuck on the same step. It’s tiring—daunting—knowing that I’m falling more and more behind every day, but I don’t voice those thoughts out loud. Not with the way Nate reacted that time he dropped by the lab.