Chapter 24
Parker
Iopen the door to Darcy’s smiling face.
“Hey!”
He’s an idiot in love. I can tell, but fuck, I think I might also be an idiot in love. I nearly break out in a cold sweat. No. I don’t have to be afraid. I trust them.
“Come on in.” I step back, gesturing him inside.
“Still wanna go get coffee?”
I nod. “Yeah.”
Darcy grins. “Then there’s no point in me coming in.”
I roll my eyes. “You’re right. Alright, let’s go then.”
The walk to the coffee shop is pretty short from my apartment, but I’m still half-frozen by the time we get there.
“Jesus, it’s cold,” Darcy mumbles, shivering as he pulls the door open and steps inside.
“Fuck, it really is.”
The line is empty, and when Darcy has ordered his nasty cinnamon tea and I’ve ordered my coffee—hot for once instead of iced—we sit down at our usual table. He takes a sip of his tea, eyeing me over the brim of the mug. “What’s new with you?”
“What’s new with me? Nothing.”
Darcy laughs. “Liar. Tell me about Ben and Landon.”
I shake my head. “Nothing to tell.”
“Double liar. I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours.”
Holding my nose up in the air, I shudder. “That’s gross, Darce.”
He rolls his eyes. “You’re full of it. Come on, I’m nosy.”
I want to be more open with him. I want to tell him about Lincoln, about my fears, about my worries, and about how I feel for Ben and Landon. “You won’t tell West anything?”
He looks offended. “Park, we’ve been friends since we were sixteen. When have I ever told your secrets?”
Well, never, but I also haven’t told him many of them. I inhale a deep breath. “I’m not as big of a whore as I act like.”
Darcy blinks at me, his eyes going wide and owlish, then he laughs. Cackles, really. “Sure. Okay.”
“I’m serious.” I don’t know why it’s suddenly so important for me to make him believe that, when I spent so long trying to make him think the opposite.
He raises an eyebrow. “So you’re not fucking around with Ben and Landon, then?”
“I think I’m in love with them.”
Darcy’s jaw drops open. “What? You just met them. Well, you just met Landon.”
I shake my head. “No.”
“Yes. I was there. Literally two nights ago at the bar.”
“No. We’ve been hanging out for months. Since before my art exhibit.” Darcy stares at me blankly, so I continue. “Remember when I said I was sketching a macho football player?” Darcy nods slowly. “That was Ben.”
“That was months ago,” Darcy hisses.
“That’s what I said, Darce. Keep up.”
“So at the football game—”
“I already knew Ben, yeah. We’d been hanging out for weeks. He and Landon came over after the game, and we had a sleepover.”
He holds a hand in the air. “I don’t need to know about your conquests.”
“We didn’t even have sex. Not that night anyway.”
“Oh…” Darcy stares at me for a second, his head cocked to the side. “Wait! You’re lying. The day after the game. I called, and you were—” He cuts himself off, his face turning red.
I can’t help it; I laugh. Mostly because I’m remembering how funny Ben found it and how much I loved hearing him laugh.
“I was faking. Ben and Landon were sitting right next to me the whole time, but nothing else was happening.” I raise an eyebrow at him.
“Do you really think I’d make you listen to me having sex? ”
“No…” Darcy frowns. “No, I guess not.”
“I’ve had three hookups since we started college. That’s it.”
I can tell I’ve shocked him into silence. “Then… why?”
I sigh, settling back in my seat, then shrug. “I don’t know, really. It felt like it gave me some extra protection or something. I think it really started because I was trying to make myself feel better, and then it just got out of hand, and I didn’t know how to make it stop.”
He leans forward in his seat, his features softening. “Make yourself feel better about what?”
“You remember me talking about Lincoln when we were younger?”
Anger twists Darcy’s face. “Yes. That asshole.”
My brows shoot up. Well, damn. Darcy never cusses. Not unless he’s really pissed off about something. “Well, he was… worse than I let on.” I chuckle lightly. “Basically, he destroyed my confidence and made me hate myself a little.”
“I knew he was a jerk. I mean… your parents have a nickname for him and everything.” I can’t help but grin. Even after all this time, they haven’t let it go. “But, jeez, Park. I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”
“I didn’t want you to,” I whisper.
He nods, nibbling his lower lip. “So why now?”
I laugh. “Because I’m freaking the fuck out, and I need to talk to someone about it.”
“Well, I’m always here,” he says, eyes softening. “You should already know that.”
I do. Or at least, I think I do. Knowing and accepting are two different things. But I’m so damn tired of holding myself at arm’s length from everyone I care about. I’m so tired of pretending I don’t care about anything when I do. “I know. I just… haven’t ever wanted to share before.”
Taking another sip of his tea, he glances at me. “Are they good to you? I’ve apparently built a reputation for beating up buttholes, so…”
I couldn’t fight my smile if I tried. “No need. They’re amazing, honestly. I couldn’t ask for better.”
“So then what’s the problem?”
That’s the question of the hour, huh? “I don’t really know. I think I’ve just gone so long without opening up to people that I don’t know how to now. Ben and Lan are doing a good job breaking down my walls, but it’s still so damn nerve-wracking.”
“Even with me?” Darcy can’t disguise the hurt in his voice, and it makes my heart clench painfully.
“Ask me anything.”
Darcy’s eyes widen. “Uh…” I wait patiently, trying not to worry myself about what he’s going to come up with. “How do the three of you work?”
I shrug. “I don’t really know how to explain it. We just do. Like, all our pieces just line up well together. Like a sunset.”
“A sunset?”
I nod. “Yeah, the colors. How the colors just mix in the perfect way? It’s like that.”
Smiling softly, Darcy nods. “That’s sweet, Park. I’m happy for you. Even if you are a massive pain in the butt and a menace most of the time.” He cocks his head. “But wait, I’m still confused. How did you and Landon meet? Through Ben?”
I shake my head, laughing. “No, actually. He kept running into me. Literally. Like one time, he knocked all my art supplies out of my hands, and then the next time I saw him, he spilled my coffee all over me. He gave me his hoodie to wear because my dress was soaked, and when he came to get it…” I smile at the memory.
These two are turning me into a sap. Fucking disgusting.
“He just hung out for the rest of the night.”
“I see how it is,” Darcy says, smirking.
“See how what is?”
He rolls his eyes but chuckles. “I started dating a football player, and you had to one-up me and get two of your own.”
I laugh out loud at that. “Trust me, that was not my thought process at all.”
“I’m messing with you.”
“How are things with you and West?”
He raises his eyebrows. “Oh, you didn’t hear? He was telling the whole bar about the size of my dick and our…” He clears his throat. “Our bedroom activities. Loudly. And then he said we should go home and make beautiful, smart babies who are good at sports.”
My jaw hits the floor. “What? No. I didn’t hear a thing.”
Darcy groans. “I’m surprised, since Ben had a front-row seat to the whole thing. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to look him in the eye again.”
“Ben?”
He nods, cheeks flushing red. “It was awful, Park.” Looking back and forth quickly, he leans over the table, lowering his voice. “He told them about me fingering him.”
I’ve never been more thankful in my life to have not just taken a drink because I have no doubt I’d have sprayed coffee all over the table. “Oh my God. I can’t believe you said that out loud.”
“I’m not a prude, Park. Jesus. I just don’t want my sex life broadcast all over. Besides, who are you to judge? You’ve been faking yours.”
That catches me off guard, and I sputter a laugh. “Not anymore.”
“Is it weird?”
“Is what weird?”
“Don’t make me say it.” I’m so gonna make him say it. He stares at me for a second, and I smirk. He groans. “Freaking menace. Is it weird having sex with two different people? How does it work?”
“Basically, the same way sex with one person works.” I raise an eyebrow. “Only… you know, with two.”
Darcy shoots me an unimpressed look. “I’m finally curious about your sex life, and this is what I get. Can I ask another question?”
I wave my hand. “Go ahead.”
“Are Ben and Landon together too? Like…” He trails off.
Rolling my eyes, I nod. “Yeah.” Still working out the logistics of the one-on-one relationships. I really need to have a talk with them about that, honestly. I trust them. And myself. We’ll be okay if they enjoy time together without me. I know that now.
Darcy’s eyes flash. “I bet that’s hot.” He sits back, crossing his arms over his chest. “Dang, all that muscle? I bet those two alpha males together are…” Darcy sinks his teeth into his bottom lip, eyes going hazy like he’s picturing it.
“Don’t talk about them like that.”
He shrugs. “I’m just saying I bet they’re hot together. Fighting for dominance and stuff.”
“Darcy,” I growl.
Leaning forward, he braces his elbows on the table, a smirk spreading across his face. “Not so fun when it’s someone talking about the people you’re into, hey?”
My jaw drops open. “Wow. You really were just giving my own shit back to me, huh?”
“It’s no less than you deserve, Parker.”
I grin. That’s fair. I’ll give him that. “I solemnly swear to stop making inappropriate comments about West.”
Darcy sits back in his chair, eyes softening around the edges. “I’m in love with him.”
“Duh. I could have called that from a mile away. Does he know?”
Darcy nods, an uncharacteristically shy smile on his lips. “Yeah.” I wait to see if he’s gonna say more, and when he doesn’t, I wave my hand through the air. “He told me first,” he adds.
“I’m happy for you, Darce. He seems like a really great guy.”
“He is.” He takes another sip of his tea. “Hey, you all should come over for the Super Bowl in a couple of months.”
I laugh. “I can’t believe you’re a damn football fan now.”
“Ugh. Me neither. It’s the football pants. I’m a convert. What can I say?”
“Never mind that your boyfriend is the quarterback.”
Darcy scoffs. “As if you’re not dating the wide receiver and the left tackle.”
My eyebrows shoot up. “I’m impressed. You know Landon’s position?”
“I told you I liked football, you dingbat.”
I hold my hands up. “Alright, fair.”
I’ve missed hanging out with Darcy. It’s been hard keeping so much from him. So much of the truth, anyway. Just telling him about Ben and Landon feels like a weight’s been lifted off my chest.
We sit together, catching up and chatting, until he has to go to class, and by the time I leave the coffee shop to head back home, I can’t stop smiling.