Chapter 21 #3
It was less about being mad and more about being confused.
She never gave me a real reason why she wanted to go our separate ways.
Danessa claimed she needed space and time to think but, in the months leading up to the breakup we were making significant plans for our future.
“If I said all the things I wanted to, you’d leave with your feelings hurt. ”
“There it is. I thought it would take longer to rear its ugly head but you always surprise me.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Grudges, you’ve been holding on to this dry ass bone for years and now you’re gonna make sure we’re even.”
“I’m not fucking holding grudges. You blindsided me, I was hurt. Don’t fucking try to act like … don’t fucking do this.”
“I did what was best for me and I’m not going to apologize for that.”
My hand swept across the open space. “This is what was best for you?”
“Wow, one minute you’re telling me I have a great life I should be proud of, and the next minute you’re shitting on it.”
“I’m not. But don’t pretend you didn’t choose a two-bedroom condo over a life with me.”
“You offered me a life you thought I deserved, not the one I wanted.”
“So being with me … eventually becoming my wife was something you didn’t want?”
“It’s difficult to explain because if a man wants to take care of you, most women would let him.
But that shit comes with strings. And people never read the fine print.
Sure, you drive a fancy car and live in a beautiful house, but none of that shit is in your name.
So your boyfriend or husband can take it all away at any moment. ”
“You’re talking about other people’s lives, not ours.”
“It’s always someone else’s life until eventually it’s you. Famous athletes behave like they can do anything; I’ve seen it firsthand with the men my mother dealt with. And I didn’t want to hold my breath waiting for a call or social media post about you behaving badly with another woman.”
“Danessa, I don’t even fucking move like that.”
“That’s what they all say and then slowly over time things shift. I’m sure Colin Pratt’s wife didn’t sign up to be embarrassed every seven to ten business days. Did you know a woman just came forward claiming he’s the father of her unborn child?”
“So, you ended us over what ifs? Because others tried and failed, you decided to cut your losses. Do you hear how dumb that sounds?”
“No, it was more about the fact that we weren’t traveling in the same direction.”
“And we are now?”
“Somehow our paths crossed after all these years.”
“Maybe the reason our paths crossed is to teach me a lesson I still haven’t learned.”
“Whoa, fuck you.” When Danessa was angry, she could be hardcore. It was learned behavior from her mother. They rarely had a conversation that didn’t dissolve into a shouting match. “Because us not working out was all my fault? You played your part too.”
“How so?”
“You didn’t listen. You said you were blindsided but there were signs.
I got accepted to a bunch of top law schools.
Chicago, California, Texas. And when I told you I was also accepted into the law program at the University of Missouri, it was like that school was my only viable option.
It was always Missouri this and Missouri that.
You were so excited, and I didn’t want to ruin it for you. ”
“So instead of talking to me about your doubts, you decided to end it and leave me to wonder why all these years? I would be a fool if I didn’t entertain the possibility of you ultimately hurting me all over again.” Shit, Nori was right. What the fuck was I doing?
“I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“I’m not saying leaving me was wrong. I just wish you’d given me the opportunity to make it right.”
Her shoulders rounded into a defeated heap. “Walking away was the hardest decision I’ve ever made.”
“Honestly, I don’t know if I can ever fucking trust you in the same way,” I spat out.
Danessa’s face crumbled. And tears fell from her eyes. She was also sensitive, she acted hard but inside she felt everything and took it to heart.
When I reached for her, my hands were trembling.
“No, baby please. I didn’t mean … I’m just venting.
I didn’t say it to make you cry. I just …
I just really loved you and I didn’t see any of that coming.
And maybe I should’ve. And it just fucked me up for a really long time.
And I’m not saying that’s your fault. Because there were underlying traumas I hadn’t dealt with.
Like my fear of abandonment and not being good enough.
But I just thought you saw me and when you left, I felt all turned around and it was difficult learning how to navigate life alone because you’d always been by my side.
I guess I just need to do a better job at protecting myself. ”
“From me?” Her face was a mess with mascara stained tears.
“You can’t make me fall for you all over again if you don’t believe in us.
I know my persona is bigger than life, and being with me sometimes makes others feel small.
But for me you were the reason the sun rose each morning, the moon’s sole purpose was to greet you at night.
You couldn’t tell me flowers didn’t grow under your feet.
Being loved by you single-handedly altered the way in which I view the world.
Loving you isn’t something a person just gets over.
So, if you have any reservations, maybe we need to take this bitch off cruise control and pump the brakes. ”
“I don’t even know what we’re doing. And I can’t promise this time will be forever. But I do know two things. That I’ve never cared for anyone as much as you. And I’m willing to do this life thing with you over and over again until we get it right.”
Her kiss hit me like lightning. Our lips urgent and demanding igniting every nerve in my body.
Danessa was back in my lap, her hands gripped my shoulders, nails pressing into my skin just enough to send a shiver down my spine, as the heat of her body pressed against mine.
I could hear the faint thrum of my heartbeat in my ears accelerating and drowning out everything except the sound of her soft, gasping breaths.
“Take off your fucking clothes,” I demanded. We removed several articles of clothing before we made it back in the condo. My need for her was a top priority.
In the bedroom she grabbed my face. “No condom just you. Is that okay?”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, I just wanna feel you.” If it was anyone other than her that would be a hard no. But let’s not pretend I didn’t want to perform the backstroke in Lake Nessa.
My dick slid in place like a key entering a lock.
A tight, wet, soft lock. She buried her face into my neck licking my skin when her mouth landed on my ear, I almost dropped us.
My ears were my spot and having her tongue run across it was sending me.
Her soft moans and grunts taking me to auditory heights.
“Fucking look at me.” Her eyes landed on my face soft and hazy. “I’m sorry I yelled and made you cry. And I’m sorry for what’s about to happen next.”
Her eyes turned sober. “What’s happening?”
“I’m gonna fuck you so hard I might make you cry again.” I braced my back against the wall and dropped into a squat, grabbing her waist I lifted up and brought her down hard so she slammed into my lap. Danessa shuttered and her eyes rolled to the back of her head.
“Whose pussy is this?” I yelled like a drill sergeant.
Danessa groaned. Grabbing her by the back of her neck I tilted her head until our eyes were level. “Answer me. Whose pussy is this?”
“Yours,” she breathed out. “It’s yours. Ugh, Aldi fuck.”
“And you look so pretty riding it.” Standing I smacked her ass. “Too hard?”
“No.”
“Harder.”
“Yes, please.” I smacked that phat ass again and her hips hitched picking up the tempo.
I’d clocked forty minutes of game time, but Danessa was working a whole new set of muscles.
My arms supported her body which was in a semi state of free fall.
She seemed less concerned about her physical safety, all she cared about was working her pussy over my dick.
Her legs were loosely hooked around my waist as if she’d placed all her trust in me to support our combined weight.
This was the Danessa I liked the most. She was always so routine driven.
But when she let herself go, she never cease to amaze me.
And right now, she was locked in, twerking on my penis as my hands massaged her skin.
“God your dick is dangerous. It makes me want to do the most deplorable things.”
“Use me baby. I’m here for you.”
Danessa wrapped her left arm around my neck, her body bouncing up and down on the dick. The sounds our bodies made were reminiscent of the mac and cheese I was stirring minutes earlier. “Dig me out, baby.”
Bracing my legs, I pulsated my hips with thrusts that made her scream my name. If her neighbors were pissed earlier, they had to be livid now. The sound of Danessa’s screams pinged against the walls. “Fuck me, daddy, I need you so bad.”
“Like this?” I took control, grabbing her waist I drove her gushy core up and down my shaft.
“Aldridge,” she squealed. “Fuck, baby.”
Danessa’s body curved into mine. Her head settled into the crook of my neck, and she whispered filthy promises I prayed to God she intended to make good on. Goose pimples pebbled my skin in response to her raspy words.
“Aldi, I’m gonna come. Is that okay?”
“Let go, baby.” My approval carried weight of the magical words open sesame, and her body convulsed and trembled while she fucked my tongue with hers.
“You make my body feel so good. No one else ever came close.” Danessa grabbed my face.
“Come for me. I want you to fill me up.” Shit, you ain’t got to ask me twice.
Danessa stroked the nape of my neck, coercing me to release all this built-up desire.
After four quick thrusts my dick jerked and I couldn’t hold back a deep moan of pleasure at the thought of painting her walls.
I met her eyes, and her voice was damn near ethereal. “Was it good for you baby?”
“Yes.”
“Would you be mad if I begged for more?” My dick was literally still inside her. But with Danessa I stayed on ready.
“You don’t have to beg.” After back shots that left us both spent, we sat in bed eating the mac and cheese fresh out of the oven.
“I have to admit this mac and cheese slaps.” Danessa licked the back of her fork.
“I know right. That random colonizer did her big one with this.”
“It hit the spot. Thank you.”
“Yep. What is your weekend looking like?”
“I was going to buy my books for class.”
“Mind if I tag along?”
“You want to come to a bookstore?”
“I just want to be wherever you are. So if that’s a musty school bookstore, then so be it.”
“Okay. Friday afternoon I’m booked, dress shopping with Anika. Will Saturday work for you?”
“Yeah. I’ll mark it on my calendar. Isn’t it a little too early for dress shopping?”
“No shit. I said the same thing. No date or venue yet, but it’s Anika. I’m just here for the ride.”
“Dante asked me to be his best man?”
“What? I didn’t know you two were cool like that.”
Hitching a shoulder I agreed. “We’re not.”
“What did you say?’
“Yes, what the fuck was I supposed to say?”
“Something about being honored but you think it’s best he asks someone closer to him.”
“You know what I’ve learned about famous people? Many of us have a ton of acquaintances but few real friends. Like real talk, if I was getting married, I don’t know who I’d ask other than my brother. Some people have six dudes in their wedding party. I don’t know six dudes I fuck with like that.”
“Shit, I could think of at least ten friends who could be part of my bridal party if I choose to go the big wedding route.”
Shock furrowed my brow. “Ten? I’m calling bullshit. You have ten close friends?”
“Yes, I’m friends with all my sorority sisters, and my twin cousins, and Antoinette from elementary school.”
“What the fuck am I doing wrong?”
“Maybe you should lead with cheese and noodles.” She enjoyed another scoop of food.
“You have a little cheese at the corner of your mouth.”
Danessa licked both sides of her lips, missing the cheese entirely. “Did I get it?”
“No, I got ya.” I steadied her face and kissed the cheese sauce until it was gone.
Which morphed into me devouring her full lips with mine.
When we finally separated, I couldn’t help but stare.
Danessa always appeared lightheaded and disjointed after we kissed as if she’d spun in a circle making herself dizzy like I used to do as a kid.
The fact my kiss could cause her to unravel made my heart race.
“What?” she asked.
“I don’t think I have the words to express what I’m feeling. Sometimes things are better left unsaid. You know.”
“Yeah, I do.” I retrieved a forkful from the casserole dish, feeding it to Danessa.