Chapter 5
FIVE
JACKSON
I wake up to birds chirping outside the window and the midday sun blaring through the blinds and curtains.
My body aches from the five a.m. training session, but there’s a comfort in the familiar soreness.
I roll over, groggy, and see Andres already up—his duffel bag open on the floor next to the dresser, a bunch of shirts and workout shorts half-unpacked.
“Morning,” I grunt, stretching my arms above my head.
“Hey,” he replies, a small smile playing on his lips. “Sleep okay?”
“Like the dead,” I say, swinging my legs out of bed. “You?”
“Eh,” he says, turning back to his bag. “You kept groaning in your sleep. I started getting nervous you’d go low… all you had on the way home from the gym was a protein shake.”
I shake my head, standing up and making my way to the kitchen.
“Well, I’ll eat something after I get a drink.
My mouth is so fucking dry.” I grab a glass from the cabinet and fill it with water.
Leaning against the counter, I watch him through the open bedroom door.
“I can’t believe we’re actually doing it. ”
Andres looks up and behind him, a mischievous glint in his eye. “Doing what?”
“Living together.” I pound the water and set the glass down, heading back into the room.
“Jack, we’re together ninety-nine percent of the time. Plus—” Andres stands up, spins around, and pulls me into his arms. “…you’re all mine.”
He presses his lips to mine, one hand on my hip, the other cradling the back of my neck. “All fucking mine now, pretty boy.”
“You don’t think people will say things?”
Not that I’m nervous about the team being weird. Everyone practically knows we’ve been together but not together. “You know, like staff or even fans.”
Okay, maybe I’m a tiny bit nervous because people can be assholes.
He grins. “I fucking dare someone to say something bad about us being together, Jack. They’ll be in for a rude awakening.”
Woof. My guard dog has arrived.
I laugh, shaking my head. “You’re something else, you know that?”
He winks at me. “That’s why you love me.”
It’s true.
No lies detected.
I roll my eyes but can’t hide the smile tugging at the corners of my mouth. “Come on, let’s get the rest of the stuff that needs to be over here and then drop off the key downstairs.”
An hour and a half later, we make our way downstairs, my key in hand, and I can feel the energy radiating off Andres.
He’s like a coiled spring, ready to pounce if anyone so much as raises an eyebrow.
We hand the key over to management, and Andres gives them a nod, a silent challenge in his stance. I fucking love this side of him.
The part that’s so confident in himself, so sure of what we are together.
Andres turns to me, a soft smile replacing the fierce expression from moments ago, as we walk out the lobby doors.
I can feel the tension from the morning practice melting away, especially when he reaches down, threads our fingers together, and leads us down the sidewalk.
Being with Andres is easy and comfortable.
Natural. Like we should have been doing it from the start.
I squeeze his hand, a silent promise passing between us.
I love you.
I need you.
Never let me go.
“You know,” he says, his voice thoughtful, “the whole workout this morning I was thinking about us.”
I glance at him, raising an eyebrow. “Oh yeah?”
He nods, a small smile playing on his lips.
“Yeah. I mean, we’ve been avoiding this for what seems like forever, you know.
Sleeping with other people together. Then we’d come crawling to each other for practically any sort of intimacy.
This is it, Jackson. No more sleeping around, no more games.
Just us. If we have issues, we fix them together. ”
I stop in my tracks, turning to face him. “You’re serious? About being with me?”
Andres meets my gaze, his eyes sincere. “Dead serious. I want this, Jackson. Te quiero a ti.”
I search his face, looking for any sign of doubt or uncertainty, but all I see is determination.
I take a deep breath, a slow smile spreading across my face, because right now all I feel is peace.
He’s the calm in everything that is chaos in my life.
“You are all I will ever want, Dre. Forever. Just don’t break my heart, okay? I couldn’t live without you.”
The sad thing is, that’s a pretty accurate statement. I can barely keep myself alive on a good day.
I couldn’t imagine what my life would be if I lost him.
Andres grins, pulling me in for a quick kiss. “It’s a good thing I plan on never letting you go.” He kisses me again, this time a little harder. “I’ll always bring you back, baby. I won’t let you go.”
It feels right, being with him like this.
No games, no bullshit. Just us.
The Chinese restaurant we frequent comes into view, and, as if summoned, my stomach rumbles loudly. Andres chuckles. “?Tienes hambre, hermoso?”
I rub my stomach, grinning. “Starving.”
Inside, the aroma of spices and sauces washes over us, and my mouth waters.
I feel a little nauseous, a little jittery.
That’s my body’s sign that my blood sugar is heading down.
So I order my usual: sweet and sour pork, broccoli beef, and a side of BBQ pork chow mein.
Andres raises an eyebrow. “You sure you want that much food?”
I nod, unapologetic. “I’m a growing boy. Plus leftovers for later. I’m sure you’ll have me exhausted to where I barely want to leave the apartment.”
He laughs, shaking his head as he places his order. Steamed rice with veggies and ginger sesame chicken. We find a table by the window, the city sprawling out before us. It’s a good view, but not as good as the one sitting across from me.
The man is a god. What’s that guy from Greek mythology again… Oh, right. Adonis. Andres is my Adonis. Not that I’m comparing myself to Aphrodite or anything, because I’m nothing special.
But he makes me feel special.
He leans back in his chair, a contented sigh escaping his lips. “You know, I’ve been thinking about something…”
I raise an eyebrow, taking a sip of my water. “Oh yeah? What’s that?”
He pauses, his expression turning serious. “I want to know where you see us going. Like the future.”
I set my glass down, leaning forward, my elbows propped on the table.
“I see a lot of baseball games and traveling, early morning workouts, and a lot of us being together—preferably naked. I see us supporting each other, pushing each other to be better athletes. I see a future where it’s us and whatever life throws our way. ”
Andres’s eyes soften, and he reaches across the table, taking my hand. “That sounds pretty fucking perfect to me.”
I don’t add how I want to be his husband. How I see us—in a small three-bedroom, two-bath house in the suburbs with a dog and maybe a kid. How all I want is to grow old with him.
Our food arrives, and we dig in, conversation flowing easily between us. My pump vibrates, and I look up from my plate. Andres has his phone out, and he’s just given me insulin.
God, I love him.
We talk about everything and nothing, our laughter filling the small restaurant. It’s moments like these that make me realize just how right this feels.
How right he feels.
“Do you want to tell your parents about us?” I ask, pausing before shoving another bite into my mouth.
“Of course I do.” He leans back, draping his arm over the back of the chair next to him. “You know my parents already love you, Jack. The question is, do you want to tell yours?”
My leg starts to bounce, and I put my fork down, staring out the window.
Mom and Courtney will be fine with it. If anything, my sister has been my biggest support—through my being a confused young adult and my bisexuality. And my mom loves me more than anything, and she loves Dre for taking care of me.
It’s my dad.
I can already hear his voice in my head.
“No son of mine is going to be a fa—” Andres’s hand grips my thigh, pulling me out of it before the voice could keep going.
“We don’t have to tell him right now, or ever, if that’s what you want.
Mi sol, for all I care, he can find out on the internet or on TV when he watches you play and I kiss you in front of everyone.
” Andres tilts his head and I can already tell the thought going through his mind.
“Actually, I like the second option; I bet he would throw something at the TV.”
“Dre!”
“What, that homophobic bastard would deserve it, and you know it, Jackson. After the way he treated your sister when she came out, he deserves whatever comes his way.”
Facts.
We finish up, box up the leftovers, thank the owner, and head back out onto the street. Andres pulls me to a stop, turning me to face him. “I love you, Jackson. Everything is going to be just fine.”
I search his eyes, seeing the truth shining back at me. “I love you too, Andres.”
He leans in, his lips meeting mine in a soft, gentle kiss. I can’t believe we’ve been fighting this so hard, denying ourselves the happiness we have only in each other.
Andres owns my heart and I hope he never gives it back.