Chapter 31
Gail
“ L uce, it’s Gail. Call me back, okay?” I repeat into the phone for what feels like the hundredth time, my voice a cocktail of frustration and worry as I leave yet another voice message I know she won’t listen to.
I stuff my cell back into my pocket, feeling its weight like a millstone around my neck.
“Still no answer?” Mickey asks, his silver eyes finding mine in the rearview mirror of the car.
“Nothing,” I mutter, rubbing my temples. The nausea isn’t just from morning sickness anymore; it’s laced with dread.
“Fuck!” he curses under his breath.
“Language,” Soren chides from the driver’s seat, though his green eyes are soft with concern. He reaches back, his rough hand squeezing my knee reassuringly. That’s all he can offer—comfort without solutions. “Fet might be able to hear us, so we should watch what we say around Gail.”
I smile despite the storm brewing inside me. This side of Soren is as unexpected as it’s sweet.
“No way,” Mickey scoffs. “Fet can only hear what’s going on inside her. Like her stomach rumbling and her heart beating. Hearing our voices isn’t until week twenty-three.”
Damn, someone’s been reading the pregnancy books, and memorizing the facts like a test is coming our way. I only know Mickey’s right because for the three days I sat outside Luce’s door, hoping she’d let me in, I was checking house listings and reading up on what to expect when expecting.
Sadly, all I have to show for my time at Luce’s house, is the baby do’s and don’ts I’ve memorized. Luce never emerged, but I would have continued to sit there if it wasn’t because I had to fly to Canada for a Sabertooths away game.
Since I couldn’t travel with the team, Soren and Mickey waited for me at the airport, and then we drove to the hotel together. During the two days there, I never even saw Luce, which is weird. She should have been there.
The game came and went—a blur of ice, shouts, and the sharp scent of sweat. Although the Sabertooths won, I didn’t feel celebratory as I flew home alone. I was too busy plotting my next move.
Luce can’t ignore me forever. No! Way!
When I landed, Mickey and Soren were once again waiting for me. Instead of driving back to the arena with the team, we’re driving there together, which perfectly fits my new plan of attack.
Arriving at the arena, I follow the guys inside, quickly spotting the man I need to talk to. Luckily for me, he’s standing alone. “Hey, Sawyer,” I begin, forcing casualness into my voice.
He turns, his face an unreadable mask. “Gail.” His eyes lighten as he notices the guys walking behind me. “That was one hell of a game,” he cheers, bumping their fists.
“Can we talk? About Lucia?” I press on, ignoring the chill that seeps into my bones from his icy demeanor.
“She doesn’t want to see you.” His voice is flat, dismissive. It’s like a slap in the face.
“Watch it,” Soren growls, shooting Sawyer a pointed look.
“Yeah, she just wants to make amends,” Mickey adds.
Sawyer rakes a hand down his face, cursing under his breath. “For fuck’s sake,” he gripes. “I warned you once, Gail. I told you to—”
“Fuck off, Sawyer,” Soren barks. “Everyone here has made mistakes. Now, let the women fucking kiss and make up.”
“This is your last fucking chance, Gail,” Sawyer seethes as he pulls a bundle of keys from his pocket. He continues talking as he frees one and hands it to me. “I love my wife more than anything in this fucking world. You need to either step the fuck up and be the friend she deserves, or leave her alone—”
“Sawyer!” Mickey’s growl comes out like a warning.
Ignoring him, Sawyer carries on. “But what you won’t do is keep upsetting her. If I have to listen to her cry because of you one more time, I’ll hire security just to keep you away.”
Clutching the key he gave me, I nod, feeling thoroughly scolded. Not that I didn’t deserve it, but… shit. “Thank you,” I say, my voice quivering.
It’s not Sawyer’s bluntness, or Mickey and Soren’s protective display that’s getting to me, making me emotional. It’s the thought of Luce crying because of me, the realization of how much I’ve let her down.
It might not have been my fault this time, but I’ve messed up enough in the past to know this is just the one that tipped the scales out of my favor. So instead of excusing it, I need to own it and make things right with Luce.
“Don’t thank me,” Sawyer calls over his shoulder as he starts to walk toward the locker room. “If she isn’t happy to see you, I’m going to claim you stole it from me.”
I don’t answer, just watch him walk away. Then I wait around while Mickey and Soren follow their friend and other teammates. My hope to see Luce here is squashed when the other wives, girlfriends, and partners join me, but she isn’t among them.
Though I’ve met the women before, I don’t interact much. They’re nice enough, and they try to include me. I’m the one killing any conversation by only offering one word replies. So when the guys come back, I’m quick to suggest we go straight home.
I spend the rest of the day and evening with them. Doing mundane things like watching a few movies and just relaxing as much as possible. It’s nice, and I can’t deny how sweet and supportive they’ve been since they found me crying the first day I’d gone to see Luce.
Rather than brushing it off or offering empty platitudes, they’ve been patient, even asked me about our friendship. So I’ve told them pretty much everything there is to say, including mentioning my countless fuck ups and all the times I’ve betrayed the same friendship I’m yearning for now.
When it’s finally time for bed, I’m not surprised when they both follow me into my bedroom and use the adjacent bathroom to get ready. Well, it’s not mine, not really. The entire house belongs to Soren, so I guess it’s his just like everything else. But it’s come to feel like mine. And since I spent the night with Soren, they’ve both slept with me.
Where Mickey wants his fingers buried in my pussy, claiming he just loves being inside me, Soren wants my head on his chest. That’s how we go to sleep; a tangle of limbs, with me in the middle.
The next morning, I wait for the guys to leave before I drive to Luce’s house. The drive over is a blur—my mind racing faster than the engine of my car. Each traffic light is a pause, a moment to question if I’m ready to face Luce, to confront the silence that’s grown thick between us.
Finally, I park outside their house, heart pounding against my chest in an erratic rhythm. I hesitate for just a second before I slip out of the car and approach the door.
The key Sawyer handed me slides into the lock with a satisfying click, and the door swings open without so much as a creak—betraying no signs of the storm I’m about to walk into. I step into the office where Lucia and I birthed EduSync, my heart hammering in my chest like it’s trying to break free.
“Luce?” My voice bounces off the walls, tentative at first, but then she’s there, materializing from behind the towering bookshelf like a fierce goddess in her own right.
“What the hell are you doing here, Gail? And how the fuck did you get in?” Her green eyes flash with an intensity that could stop a charging bull in its tracks, her red hair a fiery cascade around her shoulders. She’s not just angry; she’s livid, and she’s aiming all those hot, swirling emotions right at me. “You should leave!”
“Hey, buttercup,” I say, hitching a smile onto my lips, hiding the tremor in my words. “Not the warmest welcome, but I’ll take what I can get.”
She scowls, arms crossed as if she’s physically barring me from her world. “I said leave. Now.”
“Can’t do that, Luce.” I step further into the room, my boots silent on the plush carpet.
“Please, Gail. Just… go.” There’s a waver in her voice now, a crack in her armor that tells me she’s not as strong as she pretends.
“I’m pregnant,” I blurt out, desperate for her to understand why I’m here, why I can’t just walk away. “Twelve weeks, and nauseous as hell, but that’s beside the point.”
“So what is the point?” Her eyebrows shoot up, but she’s listening—I’ve got her.
“Point is, we’re like Thelma I’m the one who’s been dishonest, and, especially now that I know about their pasts, can I really hold their reactions against them?
The answer is simple; no, no I fucking can’t.
“I hear ya,” I say, feeling my anger and indignation bleeding away.
“I’m not saying it to be mean, Gail. But damn. What you did, that would make anyone suspicious of what you say and do afterwards. Then to find out you weren’t honest about your medicine… come on, girl. It’s no wonder if they’re being less than hospitable.”
Thinking back over the last five days, I’m also forced to see how much of an effort they’ve made. Not just by asking me about Luce, and comforting me. Both Soren and Mickey have gone out of their way to make sure I’m comfortable, and… looked after.
Mickey bought me some new bras without me even mentioning I needed new ones, they were just there, in the drawers one morning. And Soren, who usually gets up first, always makes sure to make me a cup of tea and have a piece of fruit ready.
“Do you have feelings for them?” Luce asks when I take too long to answer her previous question.
I exhale slowly. “I don’t know,” I answer honestly. “Maybe…”
She nods thoughtfully. “Okay. Well, maybe you should find out.” I blow out a breath. “Because you might have demanded they show you a little r-e-s-p-e-c-t—” And yes, she freaking sings that part! “—but it needs to go both ways. If you want them, take them. Claim them. Make them yours. But if not, then what the hell are you doing?”
“I don’t have a choice right now,” I say, the words falling from my mouth before I’ve thought them through.
“Abigail!”
“Lucia!”
She sighs. “There’s always a choice,” she insists. “If you’re just with them because you feel like that’s your only option, then why not just… I don’t know, if only you had a bestie with connections to the Mafia—”
“No!” I gasp. Then I swallow, forcing myself not to say something I’ll regret later. “Look, you know I love you, buttercup. And your family is… your business. But that’s not me. I’ll figure this out on my own.”
Instead of looking disappointed, Luce smiles like a proud mother hen. “That’s my girl,” she coos in a ridiculously over the top tone. “Now that we’ve established you’re doing things your way, fucking own it and stop being so scared.”
Right… right. I smell what she’s cooking in that deviously brilliant brain of hers. Basically, Luce is reminding me to own my choices instead of hiding behind a going with the flow attitude. Kinda. And it makes sense.
But whether I want the guys or not, I honestly don’t know. I mean, I do and I don’t. I love the way they are when we’re together, and the sex is as explosive as it’s addictive. But beyond that, I haven’t really allowed myself to give it much thought. They’ve made it clear they’re tolerating me, so in turn, I’ve demanded payment.
Ugh, I keep coming back to the way things have been for the past few days, where something’s clearly changed between us. They’re being less hostile; hell, Mickey even talks to Fet sometimes. And Soren is looking into getting a nursery set up in his house, even considering buying another house to avoid having stairs.
And while they’ve put in all this effort, I can’t claim to have done the same. Does that make me a bad person, a bad mom? I don’t know. But something tells me I better make a decision about them soon.