Chapter 38
Gail
I ’m sitting cross-legged on the bare floor of my once cozy living room, surrounded by the ghosts of a life that’s slipping through my fingers like grains of sand.
The scent of spicy Szechuan sauce mingles with the bittersweet tang of nostalgia as I pop another dumpling into my mouth. Across from me, Lucia downs her third tequila shot, her throat working gracefully.
I’ve just finished giving her a more detailed version of, not just what Mickey and Soren did, and how it made me feel, but of our entire relationship. This time, I didn’t spare any details. “I can’t say I blame you for leaving.” She takes another shot. “What have you told Jamie?”
“Not much,” I admit. “After we got back from Mom and Dad’s last night, I just told him I’d moved out of Soren’s house and needed a new start for me and Fet.”
Luce’s eyebrows furrow. “Wait, so Jamie knew you lived with the guys?”
I shrug. “Yep. After I went radio silent, I told him it was because I’d moved in with them.”
“Have you heard from them?” Luce asks after downing another two shots.
Already knowing who ‘them’ is, I answer, “Yeah. They’ve been blowing up my phone with calls, texts, and DMs.”
“Have you answered?”
“No.” The word tastes like betrayal. “I left them a letter with everything I had to say. It was the only way I could say everything without losing my nerve.” My heart clenches, remembering their touch, their scent—their duplicity.
Luce nods, her eyes softening. “You’re brave, Gail. Braver than most.” She takes yet another shot. “Your turn,” she grins, sliding the shot glass filled with water toward me. My laugh is hollow, but I indulge her, mimicking the burn with an exaggerated grimace.
“God, I miss our tequila nights,” I confess, my voice catching on the raw edges of change.
“Me too,” Lucia says softly, her gaze warm and understanding.
Tonight is our last hurrah in this place, our sanctuary for all our adult lives. This is the place where we’ve laughed, cried, celebrated, and grown up together.
Earlier today, I went to the leasing office and canceled my lease. Since we still had three months left, I paid the cancellation fee, well, I didn’t; technically, Mom and Dad paid. Regardless, I only have the apartment for one more week, and then it’s all done.
Jamie helped me find a storage space, organize movers and cleaners. So when Luce and I leave here tonight, that’s it—I’ll never step foot in this apartment again.
“Now, let’s find you and Fet the dream home.” Luce swipes her finger across her phone, bringing up a housing app.
Grateful for the change in topic, I throw myself head first into describing what I’m picturing in my head. “I want somewhere with a garden for her to play in, plenty of space for us, one-story… Oh, and modern, but not cold. Somewhere we can fill with love and laughter, you know?”
“Got it,” she chirps, already scrolling. “One-story dream house coming right up.”
Her fingers dance across the screen, and I lean over to peek at the listings. Each swipe feels like a step away from my old life and toward something new—toward freedom.
“Look at this one,” she points excitedly at a listing with large windows overlooking a lush backyard. “It screams Gail and Fet.”
My heart skips a beat, a tingle of excitement fluttering in my belly. It’s perfect—a beginning, a middle, and whatever comes next, all wrapped in one beautiful package. For the first time, maybe ever, I dream about a future for myself. I know that sounds dramatic, like I was planning on offing myself. But it’s not like that. It’s just that… this is the first time I’m dreaming about something specific rather than something abstract or vague.
When I was dreaming about Cupid’s Court and the experiences I’d get, my dreams were in the hands of whoever bought me. But this… the house… that’s all me. I can do this for myself.
“Hello!” Luce snaps her fingers in front of my face. “Earth to Gail,” she giggles, the telltale sign she’s hammered, and as I glance at the tequila, spotting how little is left, it makes sense.
“What’s up?” I grin.
Showing me her phone again, Luce scrolls through the listings she’s bookmarked, she’s even saved the links to her Notes app. “These are all within your budget. I think we should look at them either later this week, or the next.”
Taking her phone, I inspect the houses closer; there are five and all of them are close to what I want. None of them fit the picture in my head completely, but they’re close enough, and, as Luce said, I can afford them. Even without touching the money from Mickey and Soren, I have enough in my savings account to pay six months’ rent plus a deposit.
“Most of these aren’t open to viewing until next week,” I sigh.
I’d love nothing more than to find some houses to look at right now. However, between putting the finishing touches on EduSync, getting my ducks in a row, and Luce traveling to New Jersey to support Sawyer and the Sabertooths as they face their last game of the season which is the away game against the Jaguars, late next week is probably more realistic.
I feel bad I’m not going to be there for the guys, especially Mickey. But I can’t do that. I’m only in the beginning of my detox of them, and I know if I see them this soon, I’ll crumble and forget why it’s so important for me to do this on my own.
“Okay,” I agree, pouring some more water into my shot glass and emptying it. “When you’re back from Jersey, we can go look at houses.”
We spend the evening lost in a sea of possibilities, the world outside fading to nothing but a whisper. For now, it’s just us, the remnants of our shared past, and the promise of a future where I hold the reins—tight and unwavering. Tonight, I toast to change, to growth, and to taking back my story—one sip of water at a time.