15. Adam #2
Unlike Eliza, I had gotten Asher used to my place from the start.
It started off with short visits to my place to get him used to the house, and having little Adelaide around helped quite a bit.
Then, I eventually brought him around for nap time to familiarize him with sleeping in his new room and bed, once I had it set up.
Eliza knew about Asher spending time at my place—a brief fib about needing to do some work from home got her to agree easily enough.
Deciding to give Eliza a few moments to herself, I sat with Asher to watch over him for a moment with a contented smile.
I know it’d only been a short amount of time, but I truly did love the kid.
I didn’t know how or why, but he’d taken root in my heart the moment he grabbed me at the grocery store.
I never minded kids, and I had wanted my own for the longest time, before I got deep into mafia life.
Dating, women, and the notion of starting my own family had taken the back burner when I was given the reigns and had to drive the trainwreck that things were at the time.
Afterwards, I had trouble finding someone when things finally settled to how they were now.
There was nothing wrong with being an independent woman, but there were so many out there who didn't want children to cramp up their lives.
Which I completely understood, but obviously, I wanted children, so that took out a lot of the options available for me.
Another good chunk had children of their own, and a lot of them were just looking for a cushy bank account to support them.
As rich as I was, I wasn't out to play sugar daddy to someone and their four kids.
Not to sound harsh, but most of those women weren't too good either.
The few I did meet and go on dates with, didn't bother showing any interest in me, only my bank account.
They made it pretty blatantly obvious they just wanted someone to fund a lavish lifestyle of their dreams while they sat around and had their whole cake and eat it.
They wanted to party, have fun, and have someone else care for their kids.
Now, the occasional break here and there, a night out with friends, a self-care day, I understood, but at the end of it all, you had to come back to your children and pick up your responsibilities again.
Going out to party nearly every night or ignoring your children for a ‘life' and shit was not okay.
That was something about Eliza I loved. No matter what, Asher was at the forefront of her mind, and she always returned to him at the end of the day to spoil him with all her motherly love.
She didn't shrug off her responsibilities as a mother, not even for a second.
Of course, Eliza fell into the category of women who needed to take a break for their sake and sanity.
As strange as it sounded, in my opinion, there was a fine balance to be had when it came to parenting.
Parents needed to love and care for their children, but they also needed to love and care for themselves.
It was good for their mental and physical well-being to find that balance.
That way, they could show their kids how to put themselves first and how to take care of themselves in a healthy way.
I adored my niece and Asher, but after nearly a whole day with the little suckers, I was more than happy to let their mothers take them so I could do a quick workout or a chore or two in peace.
But after a breather, I didn't mind taking them again so their mothers could have some time to themselves.
Of course, Eliza's problem was she never wanted to take time for herself, even though she needed to. It was a work in progress, but she was slowly getting better—very slowly.
Speaking of Eliza, I probably should check on her.
She'd been concerningly quiet for a while.
For once, I wasn't too thrilled about seeing Eliza.
I was afraid to see the effects of my actions, but I had to face the music sooner or later, and later wasn't much of an option.
So, with a sigh, I kissed Asher's forehead and headed to my bedroom, where I had left Eliza to unpack.
I couldn't help but frown at the sight of her sad little body on the floor at the foot of my bed.
Breathing deeply, I went over and sat down next to her.
Picking up a shirt, I ripped the tag off and tossed it in the little trashcan on the other side of her body.
"Little rose, what's wrong?" As if I wasn't the damn cause.
Her heavy head lifted to me, letting me see the small smile she forced on her face.
"If I'm being honest… I don't know." Sighing heavily, she set the clothes in her hands aside to crawl over into my lap.
"I feel like I should be more torn up about everything, and I am, but not as much as I thought.
I'm just kind of shocked something like that happened after such a good day, and of course, I just feel bad about barging into your home like this. "
"Our home," I corrected her with an overly warm and excited smile. "This is our home now."
God, that felt so right to say.
Our home.
Cupping her face, I leaned my head down and rested it against hers while stroking her cheeks.
"Our house," I whispered against her lips.
"Our home." My voice dipped lower as my eyes closed.
"Our bedroom." I briefly smirked against her lips before taking them fully in a passionate kiss.
"Where I am going to make you my woman," I growled possessively with a sharp inhale.
Lowering her down to the floor, I caged her body between my arms and legs before attacking her lips in a frenzied kiss.
Taking her hand, I kissed her palm and pressed her hand against my body.
"Everything that belongs to me is yours too, and that includes this.
" Sliding her hand down, I forced her to cup the hard tent in my pants.
Rolling my hips into her hold, I bit out a low groan and looked at her darkly.
Exciting fear gripped her widening eyes as her body shuddered under me, causing a wickedly feral grin to pull across my lips.
After releasing her hand, mine found its way to her neck, choking her until she audibly gasped.
"No more late nights with your fingers or stupid toys.
If you need relief, you either come to me on your knees and beg like a good girl, or you just take my cock out and sit on it and fuck it until you are satisfied.
You got that?" My face hovered over hers with a dominating gaze.
"And if I ever catch you pleasuring yourself without permission from here on out, then I will punish you accordingly. Got it?"
Fuck, I wanted to rip her clothes off and take her right now with how her body squirmed sweetly under me, before she melted into me. I don't know how aware she was, but she had this blissful smile on her face as her eyes softened with submission. "Yes, sir."
"Good girl," I whispered against her lips with a deep chuckle. "What's the safe word?" I asked, keeping my lips a hair away from her trembling ones. "And what will you do if you can't use your word?"
Letting out a shaky breath, she locked her hooded eyes with mine. "Alarm, and if I can't speak, then flash the light," she replied, glancing over at the little keychain flashlight I attached to her wrist.
At least the long drive back was productive in the sense that we came to an agreement on limits and boundaries for our dynamic, along with a safe word and gesture.
Surprisingly, Eliza had a good idea of her soft and hard limits, so there wasn't much dancing around there.
When we were done discussing everything, I gave her a little keychain flashlight I had in my car to use for the time being until I could get her a better one.
Pulling myself back to the present, I smiled at her proudly and kissed her tenderly.
I expected both of us to give in to the kiss, but the way her lips stiffened ever so slightly threw me for a loop.
Whatever mood I was in came to a full stop when I sensed her discomfort and noticed her averting eyes.
" Mia rosa , what's the matter? Do you not want to tonight?
It's fine if you don't. Just let me know.
" I was more than understanding and was careful not to sound empty or pressuring.
She did have a bomb blow up in her face with the apartment, so I really wouldn't blame her if her mood for sex was nonexistent right now.
Her chest heaved with a heavy sigh, tongue darting out and across her lips nervously as she mindlessly picked at the floor with her fingers. "It's not that I don't. I do. It's just… I don't think I'm ready for you to see my ugly body," she admitted in a cracked voice.
Every crack of her voice broke pieces off my aching heart.
Gingerly, I took her sad face into my hands and kissed every inch of her face.
"You will never be unsightly to me, but if it bothers you that much, then you can keep your clothes on," I whispered against her lips.
"Or we can forgo sex, as I said before." I easily smiled at her reassuringly as I stroked her cheeks.
"You are in charge—don't forget that," I reminded her with a proud smile.
Grabbing my wrist, she carefully pried my hand off and pushed me up so she could sit.
Slowly, she settled her hands on my chest, resting them there for a long while as she hung her head in thought.
Then, her head snapped up, and her eyes had a determined look to them.
"You know what? Give me a minute to change, and we'll continue well into the morning," she told me with a flash of a grin, slipping out from under me and darting away into the adjoined bathroom before I could reply or try to stop her.