Chapter 2
2
MATT
I’m officially an old man. Here I am on a Friday night in the middle of March, sitting at my mother’s kitchen table, browsing through listings to find an affordable place to live. I missed the deadline for most of the decent housing near the campus, and what is left would put me next-door to my students which would definitely not be conducive for anyone.
When I moved back to the South Hills of Pittsburgh last summer to help my mother with her chemo treatments, it was supposed to be a temporary leave from the university in Boston. I didn’t expect to get the job at Wrenshaw University, let alone to enjoy it. Originally, Syl was sold on the lower cost of living to move here, but in the end, her career and family are in Boston while mine are here. We gave it a fighting chance long distance and had even planned on moving into a townhouse near the university at the end of the holidays, but it became glaringly obvious that we aren’t each other’s forever when she didn’t show up at the airport when I was waiting over three hours for her.
I also got screwed over when she neglected to tell me she took her name off the application for the townhouse. As a result, the landlord denied me the house by myself when I didn’t go in to fill out a new application. Sylvia canceling the new lease with the landlord behind my back created a clusterfuck for me. I mean, our breakup is about as amicable as one could be in this day and age, so I know it isn’t vindictive. She just didn’t think about how her decision would affect me. Her friends are blaming me for somehow breaking her heart, and my friends blame her for not bringing me back to Boston. There’s a bit of a comment war happening on social media, but she and I are both staying out of it.
* DING *
I glance at the bottom corner of my laptop instead of getting my phone from the living room. I was skeptical at first if I would like having my phone linked to my computer, but at times like this, it is really convenient.
Jax:
Up 4 drinks?
LMB:
Who is going to be there?
I don’t want to deal with drama, and I really need to find a new place pretty much ASAP. I love my mother, but finding out that I no longer had a new place lined up two days before I was moving out of my old one created this necessary discomfort of living in my mother’s living room. I’m in my thirties. I’m tired of feeling like a teenager. I want to be able to jack off without worrying that my mother is going to hear or walk in accidently. It happened only once, when I was sixteen, but that was enough for me to be overly paranoid about it.
Jax:
Guys from work. Few friends u don’t know.
My little bro and a couple of his guys.
LMB:
Where?
Jax:
Pegasus
I hadn’t been drinking in Pittsburgh since I was fresh out of undergrad so I look up the bar. It’s not one I am familiar with. The search results show me that this Pegasus is a gay club. Sorry, LGBTQ friendly establishment. I am almost painfully straight, much to a few of my students’ dismay up in Boston, so I wonder why the fuck my friend is inviting me out to such a place. Last I knew, Jackson only dated women.
LMB:
Not sure that’s my place.
I can’t exactly pinpoint why I don’t feel comfortable going to a place like that. I don’t have an issue with people who identify as members of that community, but I also don’t feel like I belong in their spaces. Being an ally doesn’t mean I get to infiltrate their safe spaces. As an educator, I need to make sure I keep my image clean so that I can be where I need to be to make the most impact. And I really don’t want to be seen as being dismissive or being intrusive by going there when I am a straight white guy.
Jax:
It’s a decent club.
$$ drinks on Friday nights.
U need drinks n ur cock hoovered
LMB:
Pretty sure my cock needs a pussy to be up for sucking
Jax:
a mouth is a mouth. U coming or not? At least come get fucked up if u don’t wanna get fucked.
Looking at my computer screen, I realize that it’s nine o’clock and there’s nothing that will change on the listings before Monday morning. Getting a few drinks couldn’t hurt, and at least I won’t have to worry about falling for anyone at this bar. I am already regretting sending the text about “pussy” to my friend. It’s just so easy to fall back into how we were as kids when I’m hanging out with Jackson.
LMB:
If I’m getting fucked up you need to come get me
Jax:
cya in 15