Chapter 6
SIX
“Are you an idiot?”
The beauty of a horse trailer could haul four horses and included living quarters, and judging from how it shined, the Devil had borrowed it from a nearby dealership.
The cow loaded without a fuss, I secured the chickens in one of the stalls spread out across several boxes, and I ultimately needed to shove the colt up the ramp through the use of force to get him inside.
There’d be time enough to teach him to load properly, after he had a full belly and settled in my pasture.
Lucifer laughed at my antics, and he checked over my work. “Are you ready for the bad news?”
The colt protested the abuse of his most majestic equine self with squeals and whinnies. As I couldn’t blame the poor little guy, I opted to ignore his fussing, determined to give him a chance to settle at home before fixing any bad habits from his previous owner.
“My vet bill for caring for fifty-two sick chickens?”
“While that might make your wallet sad, no.”
I heaved a pained sigh, and as I could be as much of an asshole as the Devil himself, I checked over the gooseneck keeping the trailer firmly attached to my truck. “All right, hit me with it.”
“Due to your poor performance at being selfish, I have selected this trailer as your punishment bonus.”
I stopped and stared. “Are you an idiot?”
He scowled. “Why would you call me an idiot?”
“You just rewarded me for being selfless. Failure to be selfish has resulted in an excellent reward. Why would I want to be selfish when being selfless results in a trailer like this?” One day, I might understand my new boss.
Rather than worry about his apparent lack of sense, I went about the rest of my safety list, determined to haul my new family members with care.
Once again, I needed to thank my parents for having exposed me to a working farm early, as I’d learned to handle a horse trailer beginning as soon as I could drive.
While I’d never hauled anything as large, I understood what needed to happen and felt I might have a chance of handling the job with grace.
Isaac broke into gales of laughter. “She’s got you good there, Lucy.
” While shaking his head, he helped Ashley into the back of the cabin so she could hold her guinea pigs in comfort.
Their new empire had gotten put into the trailer along with my new coop kits, which I’d spend the rest of the day assembling once the afternoon rains ended.
“Just go get the nurse mare before Crystal has a panic attack over the colt. You can push her buttons and attempt to make her a little more selfish later.”
After heaving a dramatic sigh, Lucifer vanished in a flash of golden light.
I did a final check of trailer, occupants, and truck before getting behind the wheel and starting the engine. Instead of my normal twenty minutes, I expected to take thirty, especially as the trailer hit my maximum for comfort on how much I could tow without having a meltdown.
Practice would make perfect, and I’d take the trailer out empty until confident I could handle a long haul with my babies on board.
Later, I’d appreciate the four stalls and the ability to skip a hotel room altogether. I’d still get a hotel in Louisville, although I’d find one that could also board my horses. While it would take up space in the trailer, I’d haul along a portable paddock set in case boarding wasn’t an option.
Fortunately for my sanity, my horses respected fence lines, so the panels stood a good chance of surviving through them.
On the drive home, I stayed quiet while Isaac chatted up a storm, mostly about guinea pigs and other furry critters Ashley liked.
Ferrets turned out to be a mutual favorite, Ashley wanted an entire herd of pygmy goats, and I worried they might end up with an entire herd of miniature cows if left unsupervised.
As Ashley’s driveway couldn’t handle my rig, I put on my hazard lights while she escaped the cab.
To my relief, she took Isaac with her. I promised more eggs for them tomorrow before heading home, unlocking the gate with my phone and pulling up along the courtyard circle until close to the gate leading to the horse and cattle pastures.
Releasing the cow would be the easiest. I had a quarantine paddock not far from the barn, close enough the old cow could see her new friends. Under normal circumstances, I would have quarantined the colt, but he needed the company of other horses.
Getting him out of the trailer was easier than getting him into it, although I lost a few minutes wrangling him and getting the lead rope secured around his rump. I took him to the racetrack, and my grain guzzlers whinnied upon spotting me and my latest acquisition.
As the bravest and most curious of my horses, Alligator Bait came to the fence, stretched her neck over it, and sniffed at the colt.
While I never was quite sure how much my horses understood, I said, “This little baby lost his momma, and you get to babysit him until I can get a nurse mare in.”
With luck, I could toss the nurse mare into the pasture and have the horses figure out their herd dynamics on their own. The trick would be getting the new mare to accept the foal without issue.
Before I had a chance to open the gate to release the beast, Lucifer appeared with a headless angel, who had blue-banded wings and a bay mare in tow.
Unlike regular horses, steam and smoke drifted from the animal’s back, and her eyes gleamed with some hellish light.
I’d met angels before, but the one before me somehow seemed a little taller, a little bigger, and a great deal more intimidating than the rest. Rather than allow myself to shrink back, I straightened my back and stood firm.
Lucifer gestured to the horse. “The mare I wanted to loan you is heading off to help nurse another foal in need. This is Zenzi, and she’s willing to nurse; her colt has decided he has a preference for grain, plants, and occasionally blood, and he has turned his nose up to his mother’s milk.
Zenzi was bred in hell, descended from several breeds of Earth horses.
She’s quite intelligent, understands English well enough, and will teach your colt his manners.
She’s one of the few of my hellish horses close enough to Earth horses I can get away with this.
Please don’t steal my mare. She’s the nicest one I have.
The rest just try to kill me whenever they see me. ”
I laughed at the Devil’s pleading tone. “Hello, Zenzi. Thank you for helping. I really appreciate it.”
The bay mare whinnied, bobbed her head, and when the angel gave her line, she introduced herself to the colt, sniffing at him and licking him. The colt struggled against my hold, but a single nip from the mare put an end to his protests.
As the colt hadn’t seemed to come to any harm, I unwound the rope from his rump and directed his head to her teat. The instant the colt realized milk was on offer, he settled in to drink.
“Thank you for bringing her, Lucifer.” I eyed the angel with interest. “Thank you for babysitting Lucifer.”
The angel’s laughter chimed. “You are welcome. My name is Michael, and it is always a pleasure watching my brother dance to someone else’s tune.”
Ah, not an angel, then. An archangel. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Michael. Please don’t usher in the apocalypse in my yard.”
Both the Devil and the archangel chortled at my comment.
Before I had a chance to ask what they found to be funny, Lucifer said, “My daughter made a similar request when she was learning she’s part of the family. Now she does it when she’s irritated at us for posturing. I don’t see what she has against us posturing.”
“The worry of the apocalypse beginning comes to mind.” While the colt nursed, I opened the gate and stood in the way so Alligator Bait wouldn’t get any ideas.
My chestnut nuzzled my chest and rubbed against me.
“I don’t want to be rude, but I’m going to get them released into the pasture so I can call the vet and sacrifice half my soul trying to get the pullets treated. ”
I expected at least one to die overnight, as the poor thing’s foot was already borderline needing amputation for it to have any hope of survival.
Losing some was better than losing all, and I would keep reminding myself of that.
“You require your soul,” Michael informed me in a solemn tone. “What is the matter with your chickens?”
“Bumblefoot,” I complained, stepping away from the gate long enough to claim Zenzi’s lead line and coax her towards the pasture.
The colt, determined to continue his meal, followed along.
Once I had the pair inside, I removed Zenzi’s halter, rewarded her with a kiss to the nose, and set her loose.
Alligator Bait, displaying her complete lack of sense and self-preservation, went to introduce herself to the new horse.
Outside of a pair of squeals, the two settled, sniffing each other while the colt went to work filling his belly.
While goat’s milk could serve as a substitute, for a little foal, nothing beat mare’s milk.
I would need the vet to check and make sure the time without a mare nursing him hadn’t done him any harm.
Peace in the pasture and a nursing colt would do for the moment.
“Behave,” I requested of all the horses before locking the gate and waving for the Devil and the archangel to follow me. Once at the truck, I began unloading the pullet boxes, checking to confirm I hadn’t lost any in transit.
While none seemed well, they all lived.
I picked up the dark one I suspected would die overnight, attempted to soothe the poor thing through petting and taking care to not touch its infected feet, and showed the bird to Michael.
“The original breeder used a poor shipping setup, and they all ended up infected. Bumblefoot is easy to avoid if you keep their area clean and allow them to have good food and forage space. This one probably won’t make it. ”