Chapter 10
CHAPTER TEN
“Don’t wander too far,” Zeke ordered me as I walked down the ramp to the dock.
I mimicked him silently while I raised my hand to acknowledge that I’d heard him.
He growled, but didn’t say anything else.
“Use the ear comms if you need us,” Wayne called out.
Spinning around, I smiled at him and said, “Don’t worry, I’ll be fine. Take care of refueling and restocking.”
He opened his mouth, but I spun back around and jogged away. They were acting even more overprotective than previously. Why? Was it because of all of the time I’d spent with them? Because of the physical intimacy?
As embarrassing as it was to admit, I’d found that we were very physically compatible and more times than not, sparring sessions ended with me so hot and bothered that I sought out one of the Dragonkin.
Not that they seemed to be complaining. I was convinced their sweat exuded some type of chemical that effected me.
The bond Gage had talked about, I felt it. I felt it grower stronger every moment I spent with them. But … fated mates were a fantasy. A fairy tale you told children to romanticize love. It didn’t actually exist.
Then again, I hadn’t believed dragon shifting people existed before my parents told me about them.
As I walked around the city, I pictured my life before meeting the Dragonkin. I was constantly fleeing, had my guard up, and trying not to die or get captured. With the Dragonkin, I felt safe, when I was with them, I didn’t have to constantly look over my shoulder.
However, I was also putting them in danger. The mercenaries wouldn’t hesitate to kill them to capture me. The thought of them being in danger because of me caused a physical pain in my chest.
A woman and man stepped out of the shop in front of me, right into my path.
“Oh, I’m so sorry,” the woman apologized.
“No problem,” I said and stepped to the side.
“I keep telling you to let me go first,” the man said and pulled her against his side with a loving smile that the woman immediately returned.
I blinked in silence as I watched the couple, clearly in love, walk down the street together, touching and smiling and laughing like they didn’t have a care in the world.
Then again, maybe they didn’t. They likely hadn’t been on the run most of their lives.
They likely hadn’t been tormented and experimented on, crying for help that would never come.
I learned at ten years old that you couldn’t put your trust in others coming to rescue you.
If you wanted rescue, you had to do it yourself.
Yet, these Dragonkin were willing to share their secret power with me, to kill the Underlord of Porantine. To put themselves at risk for my safety.
Perhaps it was time for me to leave. To go our separate ways.
But the woman had told me to stay with the Dragonkin, that we had an alliance with them.
Was it better if I went with them to their planet to ask for asylum?
Gage had offered to help as well, so even if their king wouldn’t …
No, I shouldn’t take Gage’s money. When they found their mate, I didn’t want to be an obstacle or cause of arguments between them.
“What do you think, Scout?” I asked as I continued walking aimlessly. “Should we stay with the Dragonkin or go on our own way?”
Scout gave a soft, sad chirp.
Yeah, same.
“Come on, Scout! We’ve been doing fine together.” I tried to sound positive, but couldn’t quite fake it well enough.
As I rounded the corner, a little boy ran in front of me carrying a strange looking, but beautiful pink flower. His eyes were wide and he had a huge smile as he ran by me and up to a woman with the same color eyes and hair as him. “Here, Mama!”
The woman took the flower with a soft smile and bent to kiss the boy on his cheek. “Thank you, son.”
He beamed proudly and a man with similar features walked up panting. “Sorry, he got so excited to give you the flower that he took off and I couldn’t catch up to him.”
The woman shook her head and tsked. “I keep telling you that you need more cardio.”
My chest tightened as I watched the family laugh and head to a restaurant.
Warmth. There was so much warmth in a family, in a relationship.
Was that why I felt so cold?
“Diamond?” a female voice that sounded like they’d been smoking for fifty years asked.
Turning, I gasped when I saw Troya, a mercenary that I’d done a few jobs with a couple of years ago. “Troya!” I gasped and ran up to hug her.
She chuckled and patted my back. “I thought that was you, your hair color is pretty unique even among the stars. What are you doing on this backwater asteroid?”
“Oh, um, the group I’m with was refueling and restocking here,” I answered.
“You’re not doing merc work again, are you? I know you wouldn’t have started doing it without me.” Her eyes narrowed and she put her hands on her wide hips.
I shook my head while laughing. “No, not doing merc work. I know better than to do that without contacting you first.”
“I’m glad I found you,” she said and pulled her bag off to rummage through it. “Remember that symbol you showed me?”
My eyes widened. “The knot design?”
She nodded, squatted down, set her bag down, and dug deeper inside with a grunt. “Where did I put the damn thing?”
“You found something about it?”
Smiling, she said, “I told you, I’m the best finder in the galaxy. Ah! There it is.” She pulled out a slip of paper and held it out to me. “It’s not much, but I found this on a planet near Drakorantia.”
“Drakorantia, the Dragonkin planet?” I asked.
She nodded. “That’s the one!” After a quick whistle, she said, “They’ve got some fine specimens over there, if you know what I mean.” Her head fell back as she laughed.
Oh, I knew what she meant, much more than she realized.
The paper had a drawing of the knot that matched my necklace’s design exactly. The words were really faded, half of them not even legible, but there was one line I could read that had me even more confused about the necklace. “Permanent mental bond.”
“Thank you, Troya. I don’t have much on me, but here’s some credits for—” I started to pull out some of the coins, but she stopped me.
“Don’t be silly. I’ve got more saved than you can earn in the rest of your life!
You keep those credits. I’ve got to return to my ship, but I’m glad we found each other.
” She hugged me and said, “You look happy, so whatever it is or whoever it is that’s making you glow like this, I’m happy for you. ”
She didn’t wait for me to respond, just waved and jogged away from me.
After a bit more walking while my mind wandered about the various topics of the day, I returned to the ship.
Zeke leaned against a box beside the ramp, arms crossed over his massive chest, a scowl on his face as he looked around.
He was quite the specimen, tall, muscular, wide, handsome, and powerful.
He could pick me up with ease and his strength and fighting prowess were incredibly impressive.
Of all of them, I had expected him to be the wariest of me, but he was by far the most protective.
When Zeke saw me, he pushed off the box and dropped his arms to his side, the scowl changing to one of worry.
“Look,” I said, raised my arms, and spun in a circle with a wide smile. “Completely unharmed. Not even an argument to be had while I was out.”
He looked unconvinced, but followed me up the ramp. “Did you have fun?”
“Fun? No.”
“Why not? What were you doing if not doing something fun?”
“Thinking,” I admitted. “I find that a walk helps when I need to seriously think about something.” Should I ask him about the knot design?
If it was specifically from the Dragonkin, then they should know about it.
The fear that they would react like Charles had, that they would try to steal it instead of answering kept my mouth closed on the topic.
“Talking it out can also help,” he said softly. “I’m very good at listening, if you’d like my advice.”
“Unfortunately, this isn’t something I can get advice on,” I said. “It’s something I have to decide for myself.”
“I know you’re not used to being able to rely on others, but we want to help you, Xoe.”
“As the security person, I’m surprised that you aren’t trying to convince me to leave or trying to ditch me here while you guys fly off,” I admitted.
Zeke’s large hand landed on my shoulder, stopping me at the top of the ramp, inside the ship. “Did someone say something to you? If Wayne—”
“No, this isn’t because of something one of you said,” I interrupted him quickly. “It’s just common sense. I’m a random, unknown person and you’re allowing me to travel across space with you. I could be a serial killer or a thief or—”
“But you’re not,” he said quickly and stepped around me so he could fully face me. “At first, I was concerned about you, especially about you being a liability since you’re not a Dragonkin.”
My eyes narrowed, but he went on before I could say anything.
“You’ve proven that you’re capable and that you care about my brothers’ safety. You tried to push us away to face those dog things. It’s clear that you’re not a threat to us.”
“Still, I—”
He bent down and kissed me. “Starlight, you’re fighting our connection.
Stop fighting it. Just enjoy yourself and get to know us.
I understand that it’s frightening to trust after what you’ve dealt with.
I understand even if you haven’t told us your full story yet because it’s hard for me as well.
However, I’m a great judge of character, it’s literally part of my job, and you fit with us.
You’re not a burden or some extra mouth to feed.
Your family had an alliance with us and we will honor it by taking care of you. ”
“Did you talk to Gage?” I asked, feeling my cheeks heat. Every time he called me, “Starlight,” I got a thrill through my chest.
“No, but I’m assuming you’re asking that because he said something similar.”
“Not really similar, but—”
“All we ask of you is that you get to know us, that you open up to us, and don’t fight the bond.
If we really are fated mates, it’s a miracle by itself, but even more so that we were able to find each other in the vastness of space.
Don’t push us away out of fear or uncertainty.
We won’t abandon you, even if you don’t turn out to be our mate. ”
“I think you’re really bad at security,” I muttered, not knowing how to accept everything that he’d just said.
He smiled and said, “There’s nothing that I’m bad at.”
I rolled my eyes and we walked deeper onto the ship.
He left to go let Gage know he could take off and that I was safe, and I headed to the jungle room.
“I don’t think you guys should be getting so emotionally close to her,” Preston said sternly.
“Says the man who’s been playing chess every chance he can get with her,” Wayne grumbled.
“It’s a game—”
“That you only ever played with your father,” Wayne interrupted.
Preston sighed. “I get it, you care for her and she’s in desperate need of protection, but we don’t know her that well and—”
“She’s an ally. You heard what Gage said, and—”
“We have to find out where she’s from and if she’s really who she says she is. There’s too much we don’t know about her,” Preston snapped.
“You recognize her scent, all of us do. We all agreed that she’s …”
“It’s time to eat,” Gage announced over the intercom, interrupting Wayne from what he was saying. “After dinner, we’ll leave.”
What did he mean that they recognized my scent? How would they know my scent if this was the first time we met? Or did it have to do with the bond?
I pressed my hand to my chest, but the only thing I felt at the moment was sadness and an uncertainty if it was better for me to stay or go.
“Come on, let’s get food ready,” Wayne said. “I don’t want to argue any longer.”
Backing out as quietly as I could, I hurried away from the jungle room and back to my room.
I was causing a rift between them, but part of that was due to my secretiveness. Should I tell them everything? Or was it better to keep them in the dark, to leave and keep them safe?
My bag was still packed with my meager belongings, but the gifts Gage and Wayne had purchased for me on a couple of our stops sat on the side table. I picked them up and felt an even stronger pang in my chest as I put them inside the bag and slung it over my shoulder.
If I didn’t leave now, I wasn’t certain I could. The sooner I left, the better for everyone. If I left now, they could continue on their way to find their mate without the hazards and danger I brought.
After writing a quick goodbye note with a thank you for taking care of me up to that point, I snuck out of my room and ran down the hallway to the nearest exit.
Since I didn’t want them to know I was leaving, I couldn’t use the ramp, so the emergency hatch was my best bet.
I made sure to secure it after exiting for their safety.
My bag felt like a lead weight around my shoulders as I walked away from the ship. My feet grew heavy and I stopped, turned, and looked back at the ship. My hands clutched the strap of my bag tighter and I felt tears building in my eyes.
Why was it so hard to leave? I hardly knew them! I was a burden to them! I was a danger!
Yet … life was short. Shorter for some than others. And in my short life, this was the first time since I lost everything that I’d felt happy. Even with their overprotectiveness. Even with their concerns about me.
They made me happy. They made me feel safe.
Even if we weren’t fated mates. Even if we only stayed as allies.
There was so much to learn about them and their people and what our alliance had been. There was so much about them I didn’t know yet.
Taking a deep breath, I headed back to the ship. Unfortunately, since I couldn’t use the escape hatch from the outside, I had to use the ramp, which would alert them.
As the ramp lowered, I was met with Zeke’s worried expression and Wayne’s concerned gaze.
They asked me questions, but I ignored them and headed straight for my room, tearing the note I wrote up into tiny pieces so they wouldn’t be able to tape it back together to read what I wrote.
Scout gave a soft, confused chirp.
“I don’t know why, either,” I admitted. Returning felt right, though. Staying, instead of running, felt like the right choice for once. Stars, I hoped I made the right choice.
Only time would tell.