Chapter 9 Tears
Tears
Davidson
Cuddling Leo to my chest, I kissed his eyelids, his nose, and the cute little birthmark above his upper lip. He blinked up at me, all soft and anxious. I liked him pliant and shy, but it didn’t seem like his true self.
In the heat of the moment, I’d said I’d fuck him into submission, but this wasn’t what I meant. Did he think he needed to behave like this, or I’d punish him? How much of his compliance was an act or a sex play? What if he only acted like this out of fear?
I had no idea what to do about all of that, so I focused on the problems I could solve.
“I spoke to your bodyguard. Excellent choice there.” Leo didn’t need to know Devon was a dragon shifter as well. He was upset enough as it was. “He was relieved to know you’re okay.”
“He must be furious with me.”
“Not at all. He was worried of course. He’d been looking for you for the whole night. I think he’s sleeping it off now. How come he wasn’t with you last night?”
Leo hesitated. When he replied, his voice was quiet. “Devon explicitly said I shouldn’t visit places like the Rosebud club last night. Because of my past. He feared that Fabio was checking events I’d normally frequent. But I was frustrated and lonely. I sneaked out without telling him.”
“You’re a real piece of work, aren’t you?” I said with a smirk. Maybe if I teased him, I could lure his snarky side out again.
I thought he’d laugh or come back with some retort. Instead, he flinched like I’d slapped him.
The honest hurt in his face felt like a needle to my heart.
“Hey.” I stroked his cheek. “I didn’t mean that, darling. Just a stupid joke.”
And then his eyes welled with tears.
Oh fuck. What do I do now?
“No, Leo. Don’t cry. I’m sorry.”
He swallowed, clenching his jaw, like he was trying to hold it in. But to my horror, the tears spilled down his cheeks.
“But I am, you’re right.” His voice came out strangled.
Fucking hell.
What now? I wasn’t cut out for this. I barely had enough social skills to know when to say hello to people. And now my mate was crying, and I had no idea what to do.
Where was Lawrence when I needed him?
Leo sagged, and I wrapped my arms around him. He cried for so long my T-shirt got wet. Holding him, I just sat there at a complete loss. I wished I could yell at someone, beat someone up, or buy something, and Leo’s problems would be solved.
I could hear him struggle to calm himself, taking deep breaths. After one more minute, he leaned away, head bent.
“I’m sorry,” he mumbled, hiding his face. “Sorry.”
“It’s okay. I apologize. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“You didn’t.”
“Leo, you just cried because of something I said. I did upset you. And I want to apologize.”
“It’s not your fault. I overreacted.”
I wanted to laugh out of sheer desperation. Where was my omega’s fiery temperament?
“Do you want to take a walk through the garden?”
He lifted his reddened eyes. “I don’t have the right shoes.”
No clothes, no shoes, nothing. Everything he owned was in an apartment that was being watched.
See, you can solve one of his problems by buying something.
“Let’s go to my office.”
I patted his ass, and Leo shot up. Clasping my hand around this, I led him across the atrium. I was just grateful to have a specific task to focus on. The least I could do was provide the simple necessities for my mate to be comfortable in my home. I was ashamed I hadn’t thought of it earlier.
Through a department store in the city, we ordered basic clothes for him, including underwear. He seemed unwilling to choose, even though I was sure he had a taste and wishes of his own. I had to force him to give me his size and add at least one nicer pair of pants.
“I have those,” he said when I suggested dark skinny jeans.
“Do you like wearing them?”
He nodded.
“Perfect. Then we know they’ll fit. Which size?”
Sneakers. Socks. A jacket for chilly evenings. After clicking on the hygiene and cosmetics category, I pushed the laptop in front of him.
“Add what you need. I’m not sending the order unless I see at least five more items on the list.”
That got a wan smile out of him. Small victories.
He added a few things; I confirmed the order and called a courier service to pick it up in town before the store closed for the night.
In the meantime, Leo’s eyes wandered over the bookshelves.
“By seven, you should have your things,” I told him once I hung up.
“Thank you.”
“While we’re at it, I should get us some dinner too. What do you want?”
“Whatever you prefer.”
I refrained from rolling my eyes, ordered the Hawaiian dish Devon Hassel had mentioned, and arranged for the meals to be delivered by the same courier on the way.
For the rest of the day, Leo acted withdrawn. He ate the food, thanked me, tried on the pants and shoes, thanked me, accepted the space in the closet in the bedroom upstairs, and thanked me. If he thanked me one more time, I’d explode all over the place.
Watching him change clothes and shimmy into the new underwear did things to me. Yet I was getting wary of touching him. What if he thought he had to let me fuck him but didn’t want to?
Later, he sorted his new hygiene products, neatly putting them on a shelf in the ensuite while I trimmed my beard.
In the mirror, I saw him pause, looking at the row of bottles and tubes unseeingly.
Then he rubbed his palm over his pectorals.
They must be full of milk again by now. I blinked and refocused on my reflection in the mirror.
My frown caught me off guard. Why did I look angry?
I wasn’t. Was this how my face looked these days?
I paused with a brush in my hand, inspecting the lines around my eyes and the silver at my temples.
Aging was a strange beast. I’d thought I hadn’t changed much since my thirties, but suddenly, there were white strands in my beard, and the wrinkles on my forehead had deepened.
Or maybe I just hadn’t been paying attention.
I looked pissed and mean. And as I scowled with the realization, it got worse.
I noticed Leo next to me, scrutinizing me. I met his gaze in the mirror. Was this how he saw me? No wonder he walked on tiptoes around me. But right now, he didn’t seem afraid. He was a little flushed, his eyes glassy.
“Can I?” he asked, pointing at the brush.
I shrugged. “Sure.”
I lowered myself so our faces were level, and Leo brushed the cuttings from my beard. When he focused, a cute little quirk appeared between his light eyebrows.
“Is this okay?” he asked.
“Perfect.”
I took the brush from him and put it on the counter. He stroked my beard, eyes roaming my face.
“Um, I have a tendency to glare when I don’t mean to,” I began, my expression I’d caught in the mirror fresh in my mind. “I look angry most of the time, and I think it’s gotten worse with age.”
Leo traced my eyebrows with his fingertips.
His blue eyes framed with blond lashes gleamed like sapphires, the tantalizing little birthmark above his lip moving in sync with the subtle stretch of his upper lip.
Would he smile at me? Up close, he looked like an angel.
And I…I looked like a bitter old dragon.
“I can tell when you’re mad,” he said quietly. “Your eyes blaze. Now they’re warm copper.”
A corner of his sensual mouth lifted in a small grin. He smiled so little. I wanted to see more of it. To hear him laugh. God, I hadn’t even heard him laugh yet.
Leo smoothed his hands over my bare chest. Then he leaned in and inhaled. He stroked up to my shoulders, stepped closer to me, and tilted his face up. Against all odds, what I saw in his expression was clearly desire.
“Will you kiss me, please?”
His lips were parted, cheeks pink. A faint hint of his slick reached my nostrils.
The bonding.
Whatever happened in his rational mind, however he saw me, his subconscious was drawn to me. He needed me.
I kissed him deeply, roaming his body with my hands, trying to cover as much of him as possible. I dove underneath his clothes, kneading his ass cheeks, and when I brushed over his wet rim, he shuddered.
“Do you want me to make you come?”
“Please.”
“I want to take my time with you, Leo.”
Glancing down, he flushed pink. “Then I think I need to go to the bathroom and shower.”
Kissing his forehead, I tapped his ass cheek. “Thank you for telling me.” I undressed him, hanging his sweats and T-shirt over the counter. I dragged his new baby-blue briefs down his thighs, and when I stroked his shin, he stepped out of them.
Leo stood unmoving, eyes closed, cheeks red.
His cock was hard. I sniffed, taking in the scent of fresh slick.
He bit his lip, waiting. I realized he waited for my command, and an exhilarated wave of lust washed over me.
The urge to give him what he wanted, what he so obviously needed, was powerful and immediate.
“Is something leaking out of you?” I asked, pitching my voice low.
“Yes.”
“What is it? Your slick?”
“I’m really wet.” Breathless, shivering. Irresistible.
“From what, Leo?”
“From thinking of how you fucked me last night.”
Would I ever get used to the sight of him aroused and needy? The flush spread to his chest, his cock straining. A little pearl of precum adorned the tip right above the blue jewel.
“Is there something you’d like me to do after you’ve showered?”
His breathing got labored. “Will you please spank me?”
I frowned. After what I’d already done to him, punishing him felt wrong. He noticed my hesitation.
“Please, Davidson. I like it. I really, really like it.”
The memory of his reddened ass cheeks and gaping hole when I’d rimmed him at the club… Yeah. He did like spanking. “I’ll wait for you in bed. Don’t play with yourself.”
“I won’t.”