Chapter Six #2
Cyril could only agree. He already knew that coming close to the Threshold would happen.
He had to prepare for it, and that was where Meridian came in.
Hopefully, they’d have answers. Hopefully, they’d share with Cyril how they’d changed and why they thought they were dangerous.
Cyril needed to know all of that before he got anywhere closer to the Threshold.
Having a killer coming after him didn’t help, but Cyril suspected that the more they knew about the Threshold and what happened there, the better they’d be placed to find out who this killer was.
It was clear that they were killing necromancers whose abilities were changing, and Cyril was surprised they hadn’t come after him yet.
Maybe it was because they hadn’t had the opportunity.
From what Cyril had seen, both Marcus and Diana had lived alone.
Cyril didn’t. He not only had Vale, but also Oscar.
He frowned. Was what was happening with Oscar linked to the Threshold? Was the Threshold why Oscar was changing? It would make sense. Oscar was alive because of Cyril’s power. Cyril had created him.
And then Oscar had died, and Cyril had reanimated him again. That couldn’t be a coincidence.
A hand on his thigh startled him. He blinked at Vale, who was smiling at him. It wasn’t a happy smile, but it was a smile that told Cyril that he wasn’t alone.
“You’ll be fine,” Vale said, and it sounded like a promise. Cyril knew it was a promise Vale would keep. If there was one thing that mattered to him, it was Cyril’s safety. “We’ll do this together,” Vale added. “And you’ll be fine.”
It sounded like he was trying to convince himself right along with convincing Cyril.
* * * *
VALE WATCHED CYRIL undress for bed. He couldn’t help but notice the tension in Cyril’s shoulders and the way his hands trembled slightly as he folded his clothes. He wanted to help, but he wasn’t sure how.
The distance between them over the past week had been hell.
Vale had faced a lot of bad things in his life and had survived injuries that should’ve killed him.
He’d walked away from the Organization, and he expected them to come after him again.
But watching Cyril pull away without knowing how to help him had been worse than any of that.
Now that they’d learned about the Threshold, Vale had seen the fear in Cyril’s eyes when he talked about losing himself.
He just wanted to hold his boyfriend. He wanted to remind both of them that they were still here and still together.
He wanted Cyril to remember that he was here for him, no matter what happened.
Cyril slipped under the covers, and Vale followed, keeping a careful distance in case Cyril needed it. If he wanted Vale close, he wouldn’t be shy about it.
“Vale?” Cyril’s voice was soft in the darkness.
“Yeah?”
“Will you hold me?”
Relief flooded through Vale. He’d hoped for this, but it was new territory for both of them.
No matter how much Vale wanted to do something to protect Cyril, he wasn’t sure he could.
The Threshold wasn’t an enemy he could kill.
“Of course.” He moved closer, wrapping an arm around Cyril’s waist and pulling him back against his chest. Cyril fit perfectly against him, like he always had from day one.
Vale buried his face in Cyril’s hair, breathing in his familiar scent. It soothed him.
They lay like that for a while, breathing together. Vale could feel Cyril slowly relaxing against him, which was what he’d hoped for. He might not be able to do much to help, but this, he could do.
“I’m sorry if I scared you,” Cyril whispered. “I never want you to feel like I don’t want you, but I don’t know how to deal with this.”
Vale tightened his hold. “You don’t need to apologize. You were scared. You still are.”
“I am,” Cyril admitted. He turned in Vale’s arms. In the dim light coming through the window, Vale could see his eyes were wet. “I’m terrified, Vale, and not only of one thing. I don’t know what I’m becoming. I don’t want to lose you. I don’t want to lose myself.”
“Hey.” Vale cupped Cyril’s face to brush away the tears. “Look at me.”
Cyril did. He looked fragile, but he was one of the strongest people Vale had ever known.
“I’m not going anywhere,” Vale told him. “I don’t care what you become. I don’t care if you can sense death on me or if your ability changes. You’re still you, the person I love.”
“But what if I’m not? What if I cross the Threshold and I become like Meridian? What if I can’t feel anymore? What if I can’t love you back?”
Vale’s heart hurt. He’d been thinking about their conversation with Iris all day, including about what she’d said about the Threshold and the necromancers who crossed it, how they lost their humanity and their connections to the living world.
He didn’t want that to happen to Cyril, but he couldn’t hide his head in the sand. It might.
“We’ll deal with it if it does happen,” he said. “Together. But, Cyril, you heard what Iris said. She pulled back. She chose not to cross. You can make that choice, too.”
“Can I? My ability keeps getting stronger. The visions keep coming. How long can I hold it back?”
Vale didn’t have an answer for that. He wasn’t a necromancer. He didn’t understand the forces pulling at Cyril or what was happening to him. All he knew was that he loved this man, and he’d fight for him with everything he had.
“As long as you need to,” he said. “And I’ll be here to help you, whatever that means.”
Cyril stared at him for a long moment, then leaned in and kissed him.
It was tentative at first. Vale kissed him back gently, letting Cyril set the pace. When Cyril deepened the kiss, Vale followed his lead, sliding one hand into Cyril’s hair while the other settled on his hip.
They hadn’t been intimate like this in a little bit. Vale had missed the closeness, the connection, and the way Cyril’s breath hitched when Vale touched him in just the right way—and he’d learned how to do that to perfection.
Cyril pulled back. “I need you,” he whispered. “I need to feel something other than fear and to know that I’ll always feel this.”
“Are you sure?” Vale searched his face.
“I’m sure.” Cyril’s hands grabbed the hem of Vale’s sleep shirt, fingers curling over his skin. “Please, Vale.”
Vale kissed him, deeper this time. He’d give Cyril what he needed, no matter what it was. He understood why Cyril wanted this now. He was in danger of losing his humanity and their connection, so he wanted to reinforce both.
Vale rolled them over carefully, settling his weight over Cyril. Cyril’s hands were already tugging his shirt up, and Vale broke the kiss long enough to pull it off and toss it aside. Then he grabbed Cyril’s shirt, doing the same to him.