Chapter 12
After dinner, Mats couldn’t bear the thought that their evening was already over.
They’d bared their souls to each other about how they felt, as if they already had something worth sacrificing everything for.
Admittedly, Lotta would have more to sacrifice than him, and that didn’t seem fair, but with the hotel a non-negotiable part of his life now, there was nothing he could do.
‘Would you like to come back to my place for a coffee?’
‘Yes,’ she said. ‘I’d love to see where you live.’
He felt secure enough with Lotta now that the thought of revealing himself on such a personal level didn’t fill him with dread like it had before.
Not that he’d often suggested it before, but other women had invited themselves.
And once they saw his place, there really were dollar signs in their eyes.
His apartment was in a block right next to the Edvard Munch Museum, and Mats lived on the seventh floor. He had a balcony that overlooked the Skagerrak Strait, and in the summer, the south-facing open-plan living room made the most of the daylight with its floor-to-ceiling windows.
He was keen to see Lotta’s reaction. After living here for the past seven years, he’d grown used to the difference between people who were impressed by it for its own sake and those who were impressed by how much it was worth. He knew Lotta was not the latter, which is why she was here.
‘Oh my god, Mats. This is so swanky! Look at the view! It’s almost as good as last night.’
It wasn’t nearly as good, but it was a wonderful view for a city apartment. She walked over to the doors that led out onto the balcony. ‘Can I go outside?’
‘Sure. I’ll bring the coffee out. Grab a couple of blankets from the basket,’ he said, pointing to a huge basket that was probably supposed to be for firewood but was full of blankets and cushions.
He made the coffee and took it outside, handing a mug to Lotta in exchange for a blanket.
‘You won’t miss this when you leave?’
‘No, I don’t think so. It feels like it belongs to someone else, and it will soon. I’ve been looking into listing it with an agent.’
‘Are you leaving your job now as well?’
‘No, it’s tough to decide when the best time for that is.
I was going to do it all at once, but now that the building’s started, I need my salary.
And if I leave Oslo now, I’d be living with my sister for too long, which wouldn’t be good for either of us.
I could rent somewhere in the city for a while until it feels like the right time to leave. ’
‘So will you live on the island?’
‘That’s the plan.’
‘Do you think it’ll be hard going from living in a capital city to living in the middle of nowhere?
I mean, what happens if you run out of food and the weather’s too bad to take a boat and go shopping?
’ She was looking at him wide-eyed as if this was something he hadn’t thought of before.
‘What if you have an accident? How would you get help?’
‘In Norway, it’s common for people to live in remote places. In the winter, even if you lived as close as a couple of miles from a town, you might not be able to get out of your house when the weather’s bad. It’s no worse when it’s further than that. People are used to it.’
‘But an island.’
He laughed. ‘Well, it’s too late now. Is it a deal-breaker for you?’
She got up from her seat and, bringing her blanket, snuggled onto Mats’ lap, wrapping her blanket around them both. ‘I don’t think there are any deal-breakers,’ she said, kissing him.
‘You’d come to live on the island? Even if we might run out of food?’
‘Maybe one day.’
When he’d decided to pursue the hotel project, love had been the very last thing on his mind.
How he would navigate a relationship with someone once he was on the island hadn’t been a consideration.
Single and jaded from his attempts at dating, who cared?
Now he cared. And to hear that the idea of living on the island wasn’t making her turn and run warmed his heart, so he wasn’t about to list the practicalities for her because they extended well beyond the couple of things she’d already thought of.
Because whatever they both said, he was aware they were in the first flush of lust, love, whatever this might be, and it was easy to say things you never would in the cold light of day.
They kissed for what felt like hours and yet still wasn’t for long enough, and Mats had the feeling they were both ready for something else. ‘Would you like to stay?’ he said softly, brushing her cheek with his thumb.
She nodded. ‘Yes.’
He stood up, pulling her to him and she automatically gripped around his waist with her legs. ‘Mats…’
’Don’t let go,’ he said, reaching with one hand to open the door. Her arms tightened around his neck, her cheek pressed to his as he carried her into his bedroom and dropped her gently onto the bed.
Her hair spread out in waves, the contrast against the dark grey bed linen stark. He threw the blankets on the floor and lay down next to her. ‘You’re beautiful,’ he said, feeling that the words weren’t enough to convey the depth of his feeling.
She pushed her hand underneath his jumper and pulled his shirt from his jeans. Her hand was against his waist, then his chest and he felt as if he’d never been touched before, such was the intensity of her fingers against his skin. He wanted her to feel like this.
He undid the top button at the neck of her dress, keeping his eyes on hers the whole time.
It was like there was electricity arcing between them, and they’d barely even begun.
Mats felt as if he’d suddenly discovered a whole extra dimension to life that he hadn’t known existed.
He continued undoing her buttons until her dress was open to the waist. Then he parted the two sides, feeling almost reverent about seeing her body for the first time.
He ran a finger down her breastbone to where her bra crossed and then slipped it into the space between the cup of her bra and her breast. She closed her eyes, and a small moan escaped her lips.
Mats took a deep breath, feeling that moan directly affect what was already happening in his jeans.
As if she were reading his mind, Lotta reached for his belt, unbuckled it, then undid the top button of his jeans and lowered the zip carefully, allowing his erection some freedom.
He pushed his jeans down around his thighs, unwilling to spend anymore time away from exploring Lotta’s body than the few seconds that took.
Sitting up, Lotta shrugged her dress from her shoulders, freeing her arms and then in one swift motion, pushed Mats’ jumper and shirt up over his head.
He finished the job himself, discarding his clothes on the floor before pressing himself against her and running one hand down the smooth skin of her back while the other went back to her breast.
By the time he rummaged in his bedside drawer for a condom, they were both entirely naked and Mats was torn between taking all of Lotta in, because she was an absolute vision, laid there on his bed, and wanting to be as close to her as he could be.
Neither was ever going to be enough. Tonight was never going to be enough.
The next morning, he showered and dressed for work before Lotta woke up.
Having her here, even asleep, made him so happy he was walking around with a grin on his face.
He stood at the mirror in his walk-in wardrobe, tying his tie, smiling at himself which made him laugh.
If only every morning could be like this.
Lotta only stirred when he brought her a cup of coffee and sat on the edge of the bed next to her.
He’d have loved to wake up together and repeat the way they’d fallen asleep in reverse, but he had an idea her day could be challenging and she needed rest to be ready for that. Besides, he had to get to work.
‘Hey, Lotta,’ he whispered, running his finger across her forehead to move a strand of hair from her face. ‘I have to go.’
Her eyes flicked open straight away. ‘Now?’ she said, leaning up onto her elbow and rubbing her eyes.
‘Yes.’
‘Oh my god, Mats. Look at you in that suit.’ She was awake now with a look in her eyes that could easily tempt him to stay and ditch the meeting that was most likely going to be a repeat of yesterday’s.
He grinned at her, trying to stay strong. ‘I’m glad you like it. Can I see you later?’
‘Yes, of course. It’s my last night.’
‘Why don’t you get your things from the hotel and stay here? You can work from here if you need to and I hope you’d be staying tonight, anyway.’
‘Thanks, I’d love that.’
‘I’ll leave a key on the counter next to the coffee machine.’ He leant down to kiss her. ‘Have a good day.’
‘You too. I can’t believe your colleagues get to see you looking like that all day.’
He laughed. ‘It’s wasted on them, believe me.’
She laughed and snuggled under the covers.
He loved this.
He grabbed his bag and coat and headed out of the apartment, taking the lift downstairs.
It felt like he’d woken up in a different life this morning.
But even if Lotta lived here, these kinds of days were numbered now that the project was underway.
He wouldn’t be living here for much longer, and the island was going to make impromptu sleepovers impossible.
It was so ironic that the moment he’d found a person he could contemplate sharing his life with, he was about to embark on an adventure that was going to make that difficult.
But right now, Lotta was in his bed, and hopefully she would be tonight too. He could focus on that instead of the months ahead when it would be harder.
The morning’s meeting was a continuation of the deep dive they’d taken yesterday into how the numbers were looking versus Mats’ strategic aims. Usually he loved this kind of thing and found it rewarding seeing his work come to fruition, but today all he could think about was whether Lotta was okay.
Had she contacted Oda yet? Was she still at his place?
He imagined her pottering around the kitchen, perhaps taking a coffee out onto the balcony.
‘Mats, did you hear what I said?’ Ole was frowning at him. What had he missed?
‘Sorry. I was…’
‘What’s the assumed inflation figure for quarter four?’
‘Two point three.’ Everyone was looking at him. He had to get his head in the game.
At lunch, he pulled his phone out to see if there were any messages. Nothing from Lotta, but there was one from Ingrid.
Ingrid: Oda and I are meeting Lotta for lunch
He groaned. The moment Lotta met his family, if they got that far, needed careful management so as not to scare her off and now that was out of his hands.
And Ingrid’s message had been sent a couple of hours ago, so it was already too late.
They were probably all together now. At least Ingrid was the least worst option if he had to choose any of his siblings to take his new girlfriend — was that what Lotta was? — for lunch without him.
Mats: Have fun and don’t tell her any stories about me.
Ingrid: Too late for that
Ingrid: Only joking, it’s a business lunch
He laughed. Perhaps he was being a little uptight about this. His sister was a grown-up with a responsible job. She knew how to be professional. And he was sure she and Lotta would get on.
Mats: Is Oda interested?
Ingrid: Definitely.
Knowing that Lotta’s day was going well helped Mats focus on the rest of his own. The meeting wrapped up at around four, so he ducked out early.
‘I’m meeting a friend for dinner. Cover for me,’ he said to Hanne as he pulled his coat on.
‘If anyone says anything, I will point out that you’ve left early exactly twice since I’ve been working here. And four is not that early, Mats.’
‘Thanks, Hanne. I’ll see you tomorrow.’
He walked home, stopping to buy a bunch of flowers for Lotta on his way. He chose a mixture of bright blooms to match his mood, and hoped she’d be at his apartment already, waiting.