Chapter 18 #2
“He asked about having dinner with us one day this week.” Both of them looked at me with surprise. “He offered to grill and mentioned having you guys give him a hand. You think you guys would be up for that? It would give you a chance to get to know him a little better.”
“Yeah, I’d be okay with it,” Thomas muttered.
“Me, too,” Lucas chimed in. “But can we not tell Dad about it? I don’t want to hear his mouthing again.”
“I don’t want you lying to your father, but you don’t have to volunteer any information, unless you feel it’s warranted.”
“Okay.”
“I’m sorry your dad upset you.”
“It’s okay, Mom. It’s not your fault.”
“I still hate it. On another note, I was thinking we could go check on your grandmother this afternoon. Maybe take them some dinner.”
“Yeah. I’d be cool with that.”
Lucas was already scrolling on his phone when he muttered, “Yeah, me too.”
My stomach tightened at the thought of seeing Walker again this week.
It wasn’t just dinner. This was about Lucas and Thomas and whether they liked him or not.
They were going to watch his every move, see if he measured up, and in their own quiet way, decide if he fit in our lives.
And the truth was, their opinion mattered more than mine.
They’d seen enough, been through enough, that they didn’t take people at face value.
They’d learned to pay attention. It was their way of protecting what was left of their sense of stability, so I understood why they would be apprehensive.
I just worried that their father had already gotten in their heads and tarnished their view of him.
It wasn’t fair.
Not to Walker and not to them.
Now they weren’t just meeting him again; they were questioning him before he’d even walked through the door. I hated that. I hated that Dan had taken something that could’ve been simple and fun and twisted it into something else.
I shook my head, trying to force the thought from my head. It was going to be fine. Walker wasn’t pretending to be something he wasn’t. I knew that, and the boys were smart. They would see him for what he was, and everything would be fine.
I had to trust that.
I had to trust him, and I did.
I held on to that thought as I took the boys home and started making dinner for my folks.
As soon as I had everything ready, I asked the boys to help me load everything into the car.
They were quiet on the way over, but I didn’t question it.
I knew they were worried about Mom, and once they saw for themselves that she was okay, they would be fine.
I’d barely parked the car when they both shot out of the car and rushed inside. Even though that left me to grab the food alone, I couldn’t help but smile when I heard Lucas shout, “Pawpaw!”
It meant the world to me that the kids loved my parents and wanted to spend time with them, even when they weren’t able to do like they used to. After I’d gathered all the food, I took everything inside and put the poppy seed chicken in the oven.
I could hear the kids talking to Mom, so I gave them a moment and lingered in the hallway, giving them both a chance to talk to her alone. After a few minutes, they both gave her a hug and barreled out of the room. As they raced past me, Thomas called out, “We’re going to the fishing hole!”
“Okay. Be careful and be back in an hour.”
“We will!”
The front door opened and slammed behind them, and Dad chuckled, “I’ll keep an eye on them. Go be with your mom.”
“Thanks, Dad.”
When I walked into her room, she was sitting in her recliner, staring out the window. She had a blanket draped across her lap, and a soft smile marked her beautiful face. I hoped that was a good sign. “Hey, Momma.”
“Rae,” she said, sounding warm and certain. “There you are.”
Relief washed over me when I saw that I was right. Today was one of her good days. I could see it in her eyes. I crossed the room slowly, being careful not to do anything that might break the spell. I sat down next to her and asked, “How are you feeling?”
“Better, I think.” She shrugged. “I’m a little hazy on the details, but I think I fell.”
“That’s right. You did, and we took you to the hospital. But you were lucky. No broken bones, but you’ll be sore for a bit.”
“I think your father said the same thing this morning.” She inhaled a deep breath. “Don’t get old, sweetheart. It’s a real drag.”
“I don’t know. You’re doing pretty well with it.”
“Some days.” She reached for my hand and gave it a soft squeeze. “It’s so good to see you.”
“It’s good to see you, too.”
“You look tired.”
“I am tired,” I huffed a quiet laugh. “But it’s a good kind of tired.”
“I didn’t know there was such a thing.”
“I think you might.” I smiled as I told her, “I met someone.”
Her eyes widened. “You did?”
I nodded. “I did, and he’s pretty great.”
“Oh, this is good.” Her smile widened. “Tell me all about him.”
“He’s different from anyone I’ve ever dated or even been interested in, but in a good way.”
“Different how?”
“Well, for one, he rides a motorcycle, and he’s in a club.”
“A motorcycle club?”
“Um-hmm.”
She let out a little giggle. “Oh, your father would hate that.”
“Yeah, maybe at first. But once he meets him, he’ll see that he’s not reckless or dangerous. He’s just the opposite. He’s thoughtful and kind, and… he pays attention to things that most people don’t. It’s hard to explain. You’ll just have to see for yourself.”
“So, I’m going to get to meet him?”
“Maybe. I really like him, but we’ll have to see how things go.”
It had been a long time since I’d come to my mother about a man, and it meant the world to me that I could share this with her now.
She thought over what I’d said, and I could tell by the way she was studying me that she had her concerns.
Eventually, she asked, “So, this man really means something to you?”
“Yes,” I answered without hesitation.
“And he makes you feel safe?”
“Yes.”
“Well, that’s all that matters.”
“It’s not just about me, though. I want the boys to like him, and things are complicated right now, especially with Dan and CeeCee expecting. It’s just a lot being thrown at the boys right now.”
“Don’t give those two a second thought. Pfft. They’ve already taken enough from you, and as far as the boys go, they’ll see what you see… Children always do.”
“I hope so.”
She leaned back and gave me one of her looks as she told me, “You know, I wasn’t sure about your father at first either.”
“What?” I gasped. “I never knew that.”
“Well, that’s because I never told you,” she said with a quiet laugh. “He was handsome. There was no doubt about that, but he was stubborn, and arrogant, and my heavens, he thought he knew everything.”
“That sounds about right.”
“I worried he would be too much, but he had such a big heart, and he loved me so. He never once made me feel like I wasn’t enough. And one day, I realized, I couldn’t imagine my life without him.” She gave my hand another squeeze. “So, I married him.”
“Thank heavens for that.”
“Yes, ma’am. Thank heavens for that.” She shook her head. “He still loves me, even when I’m half the woman I once was. If you find a man like that, you hold on to him, you hear?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
And just like that, my mind was at ease, and I felt like I could breathe again. That was my mother. She had a way of making things make sense, and I hoped one day I would be just like her.