24. Aspyn
Chapter twenty-four
Aspyn
A spyn aged 18
I cover my ears and hunch down in the bathroom, ignoring the sounds of the rain pelting the roof. Well, trying to.
My small whimpers turn to screams as the wind hits the side of the house. The power is long gone, and I’m clutching a small bag to my chest that has all my worldly belongings.
If the house goes and I need to run, I can’t. What am I going to do? Who will find me? I don’t want to drown.
The petrified thoughts go around and around, interchanging with memories of another storm.
I can see the water rising in my mind, a wall of it heading for the house.
Even knowing I’ll hurt tomorrow, I can’t stop my muscles from tightening.
The storm rages on, and my cries for help go unanswered.
P resent Day
Fear is a funny thing. You can be terrified of things but still able to make decisions and deal with them. I am afraid of heights because I have a tendency to fall, and my body is more than a little bit broken. Falls equal pain and suffering. So I’ve grown to fear them.
Water, on the other hand, the sound of rain, the sounds of thunder, and the sight of lightning. It’s not rational. I lose my mind. I’m aware of this. It’s not something I can help.
So the minute we touch down in the plane and I see the rain, Kelly grabs me before I can make a run for it. I don’t know how he knows or why his reflexes are so good, but he snatches me before I can take off.
“The rain isn’t going to hurt you. It’s a light shower.”
I pant and struggle, but he doesn’t let go, instead leading us off the tarmac and to the waiting cab.
I don’t know where we are, but it doesn’t look like the islands anymore. It’s huge, and the climate feels different, too. Colder, the air feels much colder and crisp, without the heat and humidity I have grown used to.
“Put me down!” I whimper, but Kelly is remorseless.
He gets me inside the cab and drags me onto his lap so the others can squeeze in. Luckily, it’s some kind of minivan.
The rain gets louder, and I throw myself at Kelly, locking my arms around his neck and burying my face in his throat. He’s a wall of strength that smells like tequila and safety. At the moment, I don’t care what he’s done. I just need that safe space.
He holds me while I tremble.
“It’s okay. It’s just rain. It’s going to stop. All rain does in the end,” Kelly mumbles.
“Why are we letting him do this again?” Beau asks.
“Associating rain with the safe surfer. Psychology 101,” Keagan says with a laugh.
I know it’s a manipulation technique, but I don’t even care right now.
“Also, Kelly gets all beat up, and we don’t,” Beau says thoughtfully.
I snarl, and Kelly’s arms around me tighten, his hands soothing down my back in steady, circular movements.
We arrive at a hotel, and I’m carried inside and taken into the bathroom, where Kelly hesitantly starts stripping me out of my clothes. He nudges me towards the shower, but I’m too busy staring up at him.
“Why didn’t you come and find me? If you wanted me like you said you did?”
Kelly swallows. I watch the movement of his Adam's apple and then look back up. I can’t see his eyes, but his face looks sad, and that surprises me.
“Because I wasn’t strong enough to protect you.”
“From who?”
Kelly sighs and then steps into the shower. He’s fully clothed, but I still step back, reluctantly going with him, under the hot spray. He washes my hair, rubbing my scalp in gentle circles.
“My uncle is a very bad man, and I didn’t realise how much he hated me until we found you.”
The contrast between his dark confession and the intimate feel of him washing me is completely messing with my head.
“Your uncle? The one who owns the record label?”
“Technically, he doesn’t own it. It’s mine, well, the family’s, but he runs it.”
“Why aren’t you running it?”
“Because…”
He trails off, and I stare up at him. Comprehension dawns slowly.
“Did you give it up for me? Is that what you meant?”
“It was worth it,” Kelly mutters.
The world shifts and shifts again. Kelly gave up his family legacy for me? For broken, pathetic me? And never even hoped that we’d be together?
“I don’t understand. You didn’t like me when you met me again.”
“I didn’t not like you,” Kelly growls. “You had alphas, and you were happy, and I’d given up everything to keep you safe and had been looking for you, but you weren’t waiting for me. So, I was mad. And I thought they were bad, that you were being manipulated and taken advantage of and used. My plan was to rescue you and let you live a happy and free life. Then they bonded us, and I…”
“What?”
Kelly presses his lips in a firm line and focuses his gaze on my hair where he is rubbing shampoo into my scalp.
“I was scared. I’ve never felt so helpless or so violated, and I was scared and angry. All that mattered was making them pay for what they’d done.”
“You were going to leave?” I can’t help the sound of pain in my question.
“Yes.”
“You hurt me.”
“I did. I’m going to make it up to you. We all are. No more running.”
“You-”
“I did all of it. I hurt you and your pack. Hell, I put you in danger. Aspyn, I know what I did. I am sorry. More sorry than I can say for misreading the situation and for not believing the Daane when they explained it in simple words to me.”
I try to speak, but he tilts my head back and starts rinsing my hair. It feels so amazing. I just stand there naked in the hot spray with my fully-clothed alpha, and then he picks up the soap.
My heart hammers in my chest, and I think about stopping him, but as his hand moves towards me, that desperate part of myself that has longed for him since I first saw him locks in my throat.
The bar of soap runs over my skin, and I watch in helpless fascination as Kelly Raines thoroughly but slowly washes every inch of my body. My skin tingles, and I pant in the stench of my perfume.
He kneels down and lifts one foot, gliding the soap up the inside of my thigh. I know he can smell me, just as I know he knows he’s affecting me. But when he gets to my pussy, he hesitates. I have two options: spread my legs or close them. Give him access or deny him.
I spread my legs.
He looks up and meets my eyes. Then he leans forward and, with his eyes still locked with mine, kisses me between my legs with infinite gentleness.
I moan and reach for his head, gripping his hair and pulling him closer.
He obeys the wordless command and opens his mouth, his tongue lapping over my clit in a long, slow lick. I shudder, but Kelly just moves in, ghosting his fingers up the insides of my thighs. He laps again and again.
With my free arm, I reach out and hold on to the wall.
“Trust me?” he rasps out.
It’s a risk. It’s hard, but I nod my head tightly, deciding to take a chance.
He is careful when he lifts my injured leg over his shoulder, exposing me to his eyes.
“I never wanted to hurt you. I would never want that. But it happened, and I want a chance to make it right.”
He leans forward, placing a kiss on my clit. “I just wanted you to have a good life.”
I sob when he pushes a single finger up inside me.
“I wanted you to feel good.”
“Kelly,” I moan.
He curls his finger in me and then pulls it out. When he presses it in again, he’s added a finger.
I shudder and tilt my hips, shifting restlessly.
“I’ll make it up to you forever,” Kelly whispers and sucks my clit hard.
He presses his fingers in and pulls them out, harder and faster. With each thrust in, he curls them. I’m lost as he turns the intensity up, his hot mouth is wrapped around my clit, sucking and flicking it with his tongue. The warm water of the shower cascades over me.
He pulls me closer, and I find myself grinding my cunt against him. I can’t stop, I couldn’t if I wanted to. I chase the promised orgasm, riding this gorgeous golden god’s face.
The water pours, but the warm shower has turned molten. I whimper and cry out.
“Oh, please, oh, Kelly!” I scream, my head tilted back as I shatter. He holds onto me, keeping me upright, continuing to press those thick fingers into me, gently lapping at my clit, until I’m shuddering and oversensitive.
He pulls away, and I stagger back against the wall, staring at him.
He gets up, towering over me.
“We don’t know each other well yet, Aspyn, but I’d give up my entire world for you just so I can see you smile.”
With that, he turns and walks out of the shower, leaving me trembling, weak-kneed, and wondering how on Earth I’m going to resist him.
Or any of them.
Or if I even want to.