20. Forgive Me
Forgive Me
Dynah
My stalker. My Mirrored Man. My fucking ‘savior.’
I knew it was him even though I couldn’t see his face. No one else has ever come looking for me. Nobody but him.
I run as fast as my body allows, his footsteps right behind me. I can hear my father screaming into the distance, but I push my body faster and faster. My ribs scream in pain, forcing me to be slower than normal, but I force myself through it. Just a little bit longer.
I don’t care anymore. I don’t care for myself, for my safety, or for my mental health. I just need the thoughts to stop. Living within this hell has been more than I can handle. Not caring that the Mirror Man is trying to save me, not caring that he was the first human to seek me out without strings attached… okay, maybe some… but still. I’m done. I can’t take it anymore.
Pushing myself deep into the forest, I don’t slow– needing to get to the bridge on the other side of this area. That’s where it can stop for good.
I’ve lost my stalker, and I’m a little relieved. I can’t have him suddenly playing hero while I try to finish what has been started for me.
In the end, someone needs more courage to live than to kill themselves… but I don’t have that. I have wasted my life. Used since I was barely old enough to think for myself, let alone live for myself.
I can hear his footsteps and his voice in the darkness, shouting quietly and disturbing the night.
“No one in the woods but Dynah. No one in the woods but me and her.” The song reaches my frozen ears, sounding ethereal in the middle of the night.
He can’t find me now, he can’t! He will save me from myself, and I don’t want his pity.
I round a tree that tries to grab ahold of me, and come to the edge of the river.
There’s the bridge. It’s almost done.
I get to the edge of the bridge, about to take a step when I see him. The moment we make eye contact is the moment I know I will never be the same. Even though I am seconds away from the end, I will never forget his gaze. It penetrates my soul with a connection that I can’t describe, and it scares the fuck out of me.
“What are you doing, Little Raven? Are you scared?” He asks, the words echoing into the trees.
I open my eyes and watch as the man holds his breath and all movement in time stops. He takes a step forward and points to me with his knife.
“Don’t you dare jump–” he growls. His voice makes the hair rise on the back of my neck, my thighs clench, and my brain to complete the decision. I ignore the rest of what he says, letting his voice fill the silence around us.
He can’t win. He just fucking can’t.
“Forgive me, for I have sinned,” I tell him.
I step off the brutal edge.
Plunge into the darkness.
Saving myself from my hell.