Chapter 10 The Good Kind of Second Guesses
The Good Kind of Second Guesses
Wheeler
His lips are achingly soft and warm, a contrast to the masculine roughness of his beard. My blood ignites as those lips begin to move, a slow, careful caress that has me curling my toes.
How’d he know? My thoughts pound in time to my heartbeat. Was I that obvious?
How.
The fuck.
Did he know?
“Thank God,” he murmurs into my mouth, tongue toying with my bottom lip. “I been dyin’, sweetheart. Dyin’ to do this for way too long.”
Oh, wow, this guy is good.
So, so good at kissing me. My cunt pulses when he opens my mouth with his tongue, and I plaster my body against his, gliding my hand up his chest before tucking my fingers into the hollow underneath his ear.
He groans, the sound drawing my nipples to tight, almost painful points. I lick into his mouth and taste him. He’s hot and clean, like he just downed a bunch of water.
He slips a hand inside my shirt. “Tell me.”
“Tell you what?” I pant, arcing my thumb over the sharp line of his jaw.
“To stop.” His hand moves ever so slightly north.
“Abso-fucking-lutely not.” I reach for the hem of my shirt and tug it over my head. Then I reach for his hand and put it on my breast. “Don’t you dare stop.”
“Fuck.” It’s more a rumble than a word. His thumb moves over my nipple. At the same time, he massages my breast, another slow caress that has the ache between my legs soaring to new heights. I press against him, eager for the contact, his warmth.
Eager to finally have him.
I’m hit by the acute need to be totally, completely naked with this man. All this skin on skin feels so, so good, probably because it creates so much heat. My nipples brush his chest as I roll my hips, and that’s when I feel it.
Feel him.
His dick has gone full salute. He’s hard, and his leaking tip urgently presses into my leg.
He. Is. Huge.
“You got me”—he gently tugs my bottom lip between his teeth before ducking his head to kiss my neck—“wild, Blue. You’re so pretty and soft and fuckin’—you’re wet, aren’t you? That’s what does it for me. Knowin’ I turn you on.”
In reply, I make quick work of taking off my pants and underwear, kicking them to the bottom of the bed. “Why don’t you find out?”
“Aw, Blue.” His hand skates down my side. It curls around my hip before it wraps around my thigh. He lifts my leg and props my knee on his hip, spreading me wide.
He reaches between my legs. I sputter when his first two fingertips find my clit. The wind must have died down, because I can literally hear how wet I am.
“Goddamn it,” he whispers into my mouth.
I arch my back, pressing myself into his touch. “It’s been a long day.”
“No shit. You wanna come now?” His fingers work a lazy circle over the place I want him most. “Or you wanna come on my dick?”
The lewdness of his question has my blood rioting.
“That’s bold of you.”
He bites down on my neck, vampire style, and I literally shudder with pleasure. “Answer the question. Or, if you want, I’ll answer it for you.”
“Awful cocky, thinking you know what I want.”
“Oh yeah?” Those fingers glide through my slit and notch at my entrance. “Give me permission.”
“To do what?”
“Touch you how I wanna. If it’s too much, you tell me. Otherwise…” He presses his fingers the tiniest bit inside me. “Otherwise, you trust me to give you what you need.”
I reach between us to wrap my hand around his dick. His velvety warmth fills my palm, and I can feel just how firm he is. How big.
“What do you need?” I give him a slow, easy tug.
He sucks in a breath. “You. I need you, Wheeler.”
My stomach contracts. How is he able to be so vulnerable without wanting to shrivel up and die? The man is not afraid to put himself out there. Kinda makes me want to do the same. Just for tonight.
“I’m right here.” I kiss his mouth. “Okay.”
“Okay, as in—”
I glide my thumb up the furrow on the sensitive underside of his head. “I trust you.”
“You’ll tell me if anything hurts?” He starts sinking his fingers inside me.
“Maybe I like it when it hurts.”
He groans. “Fuck me.”
“Gladly,” I say with a laugh. The sound dies in my throat as his fingers sink deeper, and a burning stretch comes alive between my legs. My breath catches, my hand fisting his cock.
He audibly swallows. “Sweetheart, you’re soaked. And tight. Can you relax for me a little? I know you’re wound up right now, but try to breathe, okay? I’m not gonna be able to fit if you don’t relax.”
I almost come from just the image of Duke putting himself inside me. Because we don’t even need to play that game, the will we or won’t we actually fuck.
He’s made it clear we’re fucking, and I couldn’t be more thrilled about it. Which kind of shocks me, considering I was so hesitant to give in at all earlier tonight.
I breathe. At the same time, I smear his precum over his head. Apparently we’re going to need all the lube we can get.
“That’s it.” Duke keeps his voice low and even as he draws his fingers back out of me, then glides them back in.
Over and over. “Jesus Christ, sweetheart. I’m fuckin’ dying here.
You’re gonna feel—God—so good when I’m inside you.
I might come just thinking about it. I love how soft you are. That’s my girl. Keep relaxing.”
I nod, my eyes fluttering shut when the heel of his hand presses against my clit. “Can you—can we—”
“Lemme grab a condom. I think I got some in my Dopp kit—”
“Do we need one?” My stomach swoops at my boldness.
I’m being silly, I know I am. But I’m scared that if Duke gets out of this bed, I won’t let him back in. All it takes is a split second for my self-doubt to return with a vengeance. I’m really enjoying losing myself in the moment. In him.
I also don’t want him to get cold. He was definitely shivering earlier, and it kills me to think of him being in any kind of pain. Also kills me to think about more of that frigid air invading our warm cocoon.
“I’m on the pill,” I continue to blurt, “and I can show you my latest results. I’m negative across the board, and I haven’t been with anyone—”
He lets out a pained chuckle.
“What?” I ask.
“The universe is fucking with us. Or it wants us to fuck, I guess, because I just got my results from my annual physical last week.”
“We’re good?”
Curling his fingers inside me, he presses into the front wall of my pussy. “We’re real good, Blue.”
Then he’s pulling out his fingers and rolling me onto my back. Rolling on top of me as he tosses the blankets over our heads. We’re enveloped in complete and utter darkness, and I’m suddenly all sensation.
I feel the give of the mattress and the heat that moves through my skin.
I taste Duke on my lips.
I hear the sigh of the sheets and the throb of my pulse, an insistent beat that sounds between my legs too.
Duke kisses me everywhere: my neck, my mouth, my breasts. He takes his time, holding himself up on his arms as he ducks his head to suck on my nipples. He presses the flat of his tongue against the tight buds, gently lapping me up.
Meanwhile, I’m writhing beneath him. My fingers are curled into his chest, my nails biting into his skin. I bend my knees, spreading my legs so he can settle his body between them.
My hips roll, seeking. His dick catches on the crease between my hip and groin.
“Please.” I’m apparently not above begging. “I need—”
“I know what you need, sweetheart.” He gives my nipple one last hard, quick suck before reaching for my knee and pressing it into my chest. “Let’s get you spread open for me, yeah? Keep breathing.”
I realize I’m a little nervous, which just turns me on more.
“Hands on my shoulders. That’s right. Good girl.” I feel him shift, his hand brushing my stomach. “You can scratch me, bite me, whatever. Do what you need to do. But I’m not stoppin’ unless you use your words.”
I give his shoulders a squeeze. “I told you I’m good—”
“I know what you told me.” He touches the head of his dick to my clit and circles it, making me yelp. Then he notches himself at my entrance. “Now I’m telling you that you’re gonna take every inch of me. Every fuckin’ inch, you hear?”
I am so frustrated—so hungry for him—that for a second, I almost start to cry.
“Give me everything,” I pant. “If you skimp out on me—”
My breath catches when he pushes inside me. Just the literal and proverbial tip. But the pressure is already enormous. “I ain’t skimpin’, sweetheart.”
He pushes a little farther. At the same time, he lowers his body onto mine, pinning me to the mattress.
It’s hard to breathe.
I love it.
He touches his forehead to mine and kisses me, his tongue finding mine. He pushes another inch inside me. Another.
All the while, he kisses me and kisses me and kisses me.
The feeling of fullness between my legs makes my eyes prick. It’s not comfortable, but it’s certainly not painful. Not in the physical sense anyway. Being filled by him, covered by him, feels weirdly…emotional, and I’m not sure why.
“Relax,” he murmurs, and next thing I know, he’s rolling his thumb over my clit. Over and over. Again and again.
I whimper when my pussy contracts around his girth. It hurts.
It’s wonderful.
“Your words. Use ’em if you need to.”
“I don’t need to.”
“Fuck. You feel”—inching deeper, he groans—“like fucking heaven. But I gotta find more space, so you need to breathe for me. In and out. Let me hear it.”
I try. I close my eyes and hold on to his enormous shoulders for dear life as my approaching orgasm flickers around the edges of my consciousness.
I feel like I’m being split in two as he pushes and pushes. My hips scream in protest when he settles more of his weight on me, splaying me even wider.
“Last bit.” He sounds like he’s gritting his teeth. His forehead is damp with sweat. “Yell if you need to.”
“I’m not that much of a flowe—oh!”
Yup, I yell. Loudly. The burning stretch I feel when he buries himself to the hilt hurts. I wonder how sore I’m going to be tomorrow.
I wonder if I’ve ever felt more aroused in my life.
“Words,” he bites out.
I shake my head, even as I sink my teeth into his neck.
He growls. “That hurts. Keep doing it.”
His thumb works my clit. When he pulls out a little, then thrusts back in, I feel myself fluttering around him. My back arches, the muscles in my legs drawing taut.
I come. Light explodes inside my skull and bones, a release I can only describe as cataclysmic. I’m clawing at Duke, yelling his name as I’m hit with a searing sensation, each throb a heightened echo of the one that came before it.
He softly presses the pad of his thumb to my clit as if to soothe the shock of it. He also begins to move inside me, small thrusts that get deeper and harder as he gains momentum.
“Unreal.” His voice is thin. “You. Bare. Coming. Keep coming, sweetheart.”
Like I have a choice. The orgasm seems to go on forever, stoked to renewed life with every thrust of his hips. He feathers his lips over mine, the caress heart-stoppingly gentle.
Really, how does he know what I need? Want?
How is the sex this good on our first go-around? I usually have to try really hard to come with a guy, especially if he wants to be the one who makes me do it. I can get myself off just fine, especially if toys are involved.
But this? Someone taking total control over my body and making me come harder than I ever have before?
Wild.
It makes me feel like Duke is really, really into me.
It makes me feel like I’m desirable and generous and fun.
What if my family’s not right about what I am?
What if I’m right?
But really, who do I think I am to trust myself over, well, everyone else? I’m not especially smart. I’m not special. I don’t deserve any better than what other people get.
Duke is just lost in the throes of lust right now. Once the attraction wears off a little, he’ll see me for who I really am.
The girl who’s not pretty or clever or normal enough to want.
The girl who’s easy to forget.