42. Brendan
CHAPTER 42
Brendan
I return to the kitchen on shaky legs, my face still damp from the cold water I threw over it.
‘You alright, mate?’ my brother asks, holding out a glass of water.
I take it and shake my head.
‘Not even close.’
‘Sorry if this has been a bit of a shock for you,’ Athena says.
‘But Tabs will be okay. And know this: by giving Marlowe the job, you saved her daughter’s life.
’
An image flashes into my head.
A little blonde girl cuddling a dog.
Tabby. The girl, not the dog.
Marlowe was so antsy when I spotted that photo.
And no wonder.
I shake my head.
‘I’ve treated her like shit, though,’ I say mournfully.
I may have inadvertently bankrolled Tabby’s operation, but fuck did I make her mother jump through hoops to earn it.
Athena’s eyes narrow.
‘I thought you two were getting on well. What did you do?’
‘She didn’t tell you?
’
‘No. Spill it.’ She crosses her arms.
‘Don’t think I will, thanks.
’ I’m not that fucking stupid.
I take a tentative sip of water.
‘How does it work, then? They stay out there until Tabby’s better and then come back?
’
‘That’s the plan.
’ Athena’s still frowning at me.
‘A day or two in ICU and then another week or so in hospital before they clear Tabs to fly.’
‘Does she have anyone else out there with her?’
‘No. She’s close with her parents—they look after Tabs when Marlowe’s at work—but she couldn’t afford to fly them out there and put them up.
’
By my estimates, Marlowe is raking it in, even after hospital bills.
‘Why couldn’t she afford it?
’
She rolls her eyes.
‘Because every penny she gets from you is going towards hospital costs. She wants to save a chunk before she quits so Tabs can have private care over the next couple of years, but there isn’t any spare cash knocking around.
’
Before she quits.
Something on my face must reflect my shock, because Athena rolls her eyes.
‘Come on, Brendan. Knowing what you now know, it can’t be a surprise that she doesn’t want to be your whore forever.
That’s not who she is, believe me.
’
I’m very glad Athena isn’t a doctor, because her bedside manner is shite.
I may have been furious with Marlowe; I may even have been idly considering trading her in for a more promiscuous model, but it hasn’t occurred to me until this moment that she might end things on her terms, that she could just walk out of my life when her daughter’s medical coffers were adequately funded.
I have no intention of confirming that, yes, it is a surprise.
Instead, I force myself to focus on the issue at hand, the issue which, in my eyes, is a major fucking problem.
‘So, she’s all alone over there with a sick little girl, and she’s got no one looking out for her?
’ Just saying the words makes my chest feel tight.
‘That’s right,’ Athena says.
‘I wanted to go out there with her but she wouldn’t hear of it.
’
‘How’s she holding up?
’ I whisper.
She grimaces.
‘So-so. She’s relieved it’s over, but she’s exhausted and emotionally drained.
She finds it very upsetting when Tabby’s in surgery, obviously, and there aren’t any parents’ beds in the ICU so she spent last night in an armchair.
So yeah. I think it’s pretty shitty for her, even if she’s been putting on a brave face for me.
’
Of course she has, because that’s what she does.
She turns up for work every morning looking perfectly professional and breathtakingly beautiful, and she focuses on me and my childish, irrelevant fucking needs like I’m the centre of her universe and she doesn’t have a terrifyingly sick kid waiting at home for an operation that needs to happen yesterday.
She’s a grafter, and a trooper, and I wonder when the last time was that she put herself first.
I bet she wouldn’t be able to tell me if I asked her.
My heart has been breaking for this little girl I don’t know, but now it’s breaking for her amazing mother, the woman who got under my skin.
The woman I treated like dog shit when I got the fear that I was catching feelings.
There are a lot of things I’m not good at, but I am good at throwing my weight around and throwing my toys and throwing money at situations where palms need to be greased—I’m good at throwing things, basically.
I may not be fit for Marlowe to wipe the floor with, but I can definitely make myself useful.
I can go over there and be the person to advocate for her.
I bet she’s fierce when she’s advocating for her daughter, but I bet she’s meek when they tell her they can’t do better than an armchair.
We’ll soon see about that.
And if she needs a break, then maybe, just maybe, she’ll trust me enough to sit with Tabby so her mum can take five for herself.
I imagine her pale and drawn, with those same dark circles under her eyes that she had the day we napped together.
Well, that’s decided then.
‘I’m going to go over,’ I tell them.
‘She needs someone in her corner. It’s fucking ridiculous that she should have to face this alone.
I mean, what was she thinking?
’
Athena gives me a small smile that I think means approval.
‘I’ll come with you.
Then I can spend some time with my goddaughter so you can get Marls out of the hospital for some air.
’
I like that idea.
I like it a lot. And I can see that if I were a sick eight-year-old in a strange hospital in a strange country with a hole in my chest, I’d rather be with my godmother than some random guy.
‘You’re on.’
‘But you’ve both got the summit tomorrow,’ my brother points out, and I blink.
The fucking summit. It feels like it’s happening in an alternate universe.
The idea of turning up like some smug fuck and boring everyone senseless with my wanky speech while Marlowe sits, pale-faced and exhausted and alone, in some hospital room, is unthinkable.
‘Not happening. I’ll call Pl—Elaine and get her to sort the jet out.
They’ll have to find someone else to take my slot.
’ I glance at Athena.
Her turn.
‘You’ll have to man the stall, darling,’ she tells my brother, wrapping her arms around his neck.
He slides his hands around her waist and gazes at her like she’s the living embodiment of Our Lady, who was definitely his favourite woman before Athena came along.
It’s the way Marlowe deserves to have me look at her.
It’s the way I should have looked at her this entire time, except that I’ve been a big, hairy coward.
‘Not a problem,’ he says like the serene fucker that he is, and kisses her softly on the lips.
‘You guys should go and be with Marlowe.’
‘Let me call Elaine. We should go tonight.’ I’m fully mobilised now, all my impulses coursing through my veins like crack.
I’ve made my decision and I’m ready to take action without delay.
But Athena, ever the pragmatist, shakes her head.
‘You won’t get clearance to fly this evening.
Anyway, Tabs is still in ICU so we couldn’t visit even if we wanted to.
Apparently they’re hoping to move her in the morning.
We should go first thing tomorrow.
’
I hate that she’s right.
‘Fine.’ I turn away to call Elaine.
She doesn’t sound thrilled to hear from me, and there’s a kid making noise in the background.
Usually I wouldn’t think twice about interrupting her evening with her family, but Marlowe’s bombshell has me rattled.
‘Hey. Sorry to bother you, but it’s an emergency.
I need you to get the jet ready to take me to the US tomorrow so I can go see Marlowe.
’
There’s a silence that I take for confusion.
‘She’s over there with her daughter,’ I explain.
‘Tabby. She had an?—’
She interjects.
‘Yes, I know.’ Jesus fuck, was everyone in on this except for me?
‘But I’m not convinced she’ll want to see you.
’
My face heats. I feel like a naughty little boy who’s been found out.
‘What do you mean?’ I bluster.
‘I don’t usually speak to you like this, but honestly, you’ve behaved like a Grade A twat to that poor girl.
The way you treated her on Friday was nothing short of disgusting.
She was in pieces when she left.
’
The idea of her being in pieces rather than fucking furious, which is how I perceived her emotional state when she safed out, is yet another gut-punch.
I can see it all too well from Elaine’s perspective, unfortunately: if she’s been privy to Marlowe’s secret struggles, then seeing the fallout from me and my mates trying to have some fun at her expense must seem horrific.
Still, I’m not about to let my PA’s judgement derail what is an important mission here.
‘I don’t disagree, but I’m trying to make amends.
Look, she’s all alone over there with no reprieve and no one to look out for her.
I’d like to go and make myself useful, so sort the jet, please.
I’ll tread carefully, I promise.
’
Elaine’s right. There’s an excellent chance Marlowe shows me the door as soon as I turn up there, but I have to go along anyway.
I have to at least try to take some of this burden from her.