54. Marlowe
CHAPTER 54
Marlowe
B rendan warned me on the drive up to Newmarket that his parents’ house was like something out of a Jilly Cooper novel, and having binged on the TV adaptation of Rivals , I can concede that the guy has a point.
The house itself is absolutely gorgeous—a huge square Georgian pile sitting in perfectly manicured gardens that spill over into extended grounds.
There’s a pool, two tennis courts, an actual maze , and endless lovely spots for losing yourself in a book.
Inside, it’s luxurious if somewhat over-furnished, accessorised to the hilt with festoon blinds and curtain tassels and horsey oil paintings.
Every single surface—walls, beds, soft furnishings—of the airy twin room that Tabby and I will share is covered in a cheery rose print that continues into the ensuite bathroom.
It’s full-on but decidedly charming.
It’s clear that, despite the extreme wealth the Sullivans have, their house is a proper home.
I allow myself a small private giggle at the thought that perhaps it was the aggressive florals that drove Brendan to furnish his penthouse in floor-to-ceiling taupe.
We’re a party of thirteen this weekend: Brendan, Tabby and me; Athena and Gabe; Brendan’s parents, Ronan and Maeve, who are lovely; Mairead, her husband Peter and three kids; and a guy Brendan introduces as “my mate Dave”.
Dave seems slightly out of place, and I struggle to work out why until Brendan pulls me aside and explains that Dave is, in fact, a highly trained paramedic with a fully equipped private ambulance parked discreetly in one of the many garages.
If Tabby suffers the slightest setback, Dave will spring into action and, worst case, transfer her to the nearest A Gabe and Peter are in the pool with the four kids.
‘To Tabs or Marlowe?’ Athena quips, and I glare at her.
‘Both.’ Mairead turns and slides her sunglasses down her nose so she can give me a pointed look.
Unfortunately, I suspect this woman doesn’t miss a thing.
‘Agreed,’ Athena says decisively.
‘I don’t think so,’ I protest, embarrassed.
‘He’s very sweet, but he’s just having fun with her.
He seems great with kids.
’
‘Probably because he’s been a big kid all his life,’ Mairead agrees.
‘It’s not weird for him.
He treats them like equals.
’
I think of the hours this restless, distractible man spent closeted in a hospital room last week, painstakingly building a LEGO villa with my daughter while chattering away with her easily.
Mairead cuts through my thoughts.
‘You know, he’s never brought a woman home with him before.
And he messaged me earlier this week to ask what kind of food kids Tabby’s age like.
’
My cheeks are growing hot, and not from the sun.
‘He’s very sweet,’ I repeat lamely.
‘He’s not, though,’ she muses.
‘Not really. He doesn’t do things he doesn’t want to do.
Ditching the summit and flying out to be with you in the hospital?
That is not in character for Bren.
He’s been harping on about that summit for months.
I thought Dad would blow a gasket when he found out he’d bailed.
’
‘To be fair,’ Athena says, ‘he’s been pretty shitty to Marlowe.
He owed her one big time, so when he found out about Tabs, it really shook him up.
’
‘Yeah,’ Mairead says.
‘Gabe filled me in on how it all went down. I have to say, I can see how that would have been a huge bombshell for Bren to process. It’s all sunshine and roses in his life.
His biggest headache in life is which of his cars to take for a spin.
‘And then he starts falling for you, freaks out, acts out, and then finds out that while he’s been behaving like a spoilt toddler, you’ve been dealing with some real-world shit that’s so horrific as to be unimaginable.
’ She takes a sip of her iced rosé.
‘I think that’s what we call a come to Jesus moment—am I right, ladies?
’
She may not be aware of the Seraph piece of this entire puzzle—at least, I hope she isn’t—but she’s nailed it, basically.
‘You are,’ Athena says.
‘Do you think it’s fair to say it might be the kick up the arse he needed?
Not just with Marlowe, but for his life in general?
’
‘I think,’ Mairead muses, ‘that our little Bren has wanted more meaning, more purpose, in his life for quite some time, even if he was completely unaware of that fact, bless him. I have a feeling that you and Tabby are exactly what he needs, and that’s why he’s risen to the occasion so readily.
He’ll probably be telling himself that he wants to be your knight in shining armour, to swoop in and save you both.
But don’t be fooled for a moment, because I’m quite certain it’ll be you two who save him.
’
W hen I put Tabs to bed, it’s clear she’s tired in the best possible way, in a way that kids should be after a day in the countryside.
She’s swum and laughed.
She’s made new friends and learnt new games.
Her body is working as it should, and it’s a revelation.
‘Elsie’s really naughty, Mummy,’ she tells me as I sit on the edge of her bed, stroking her hair.
‘She poured her daddy’s gin and tonic into the hedge and filled the glass with water from the swimming pool.
When he got out of the pool, he took a big gulp and spat it all out.
’
I laugh. ‘Oh dear. That is very naughty. Poor Peter. What a horrible prank to play on her daddy. Have you had a good day, my love?’
‘I’ve had the best day ever.
’ She sighs sleepily.
‘Can we swim again in the morning?’
‘Of course, as long as you’re feeling up to it.
’ Dave has retired for the night, to one of the guest cottages (yes, that’s a thing here) and has given me his number.
I’m to call him if I have any worries in the night.
I’m peppering her face with kisses when Brendan appears in the doorframe.
He may be in a linen shirt and shorts, but I’m struggling to erase the image of him in swim shorts from my mind.
‘Hey,’ he says softly.
‘Okay if I say goodnight?’
‘Of course.’ I stand to make room for him by the bed.
He closes the distance and runs a huge hand over Tabby’s hair.
‘You did great today, sunshine. Did you have fun?’
‘I had lots of fun,’ she says.
‘Can we play more Marco Polo tomorrow?’
‘Yeah. Definitely. Though I may have to cheat a little and open my eyes. It was pretty embarrassing when I grabbed Peter thinking he was you.’
Tabs giggles, and it’s a magical sound.
He leans over and kisses her on the forehead.
‘Goodnight, sunshine. Well played today. Get some rest, yeah? You’ll need it for tomorrow.
’
We walk downstairs in comfortable silence.
‘Come outside with me?’ he murmurs as I head towards the living room, and I nod.
‘Sure.’
He takes my hand and walks me out of the French doors, across the terrace, and down the steps to the lawn.
It’s almost dark, but the gardens are illuminated by the light flooding out from the windows of the house.
‘Thank you for today,’ I begin, but he turns and pulls me into his arms, tugging me close and burying his face in my neck.
‘God, I miss you. I miss you so fucking much.’
I’ve seen him every single day since we got back from the US, but I’m in no doubt about what he means.
No doubt at all.
I wrap my arms around his back and I allow myself to breathe him in, to luxuriate in the unparalleled joy of being engulfed in his huge body.
For two people who used to fuck like rabbits, deliberate celibacy is a real effort.
And yet I’m quite aware that, moments like this, days like today, are more intimate in other ways.
More meaningful.
‘I miss you too,’ I murmur, and he hugs me more tightly.
‘Today was no effort at all. Spending time with Tabs is a joy. She’s bloody amazing.
’
‘You’re great with her,’ I tell him.
‘She has the time of her life with you.’ It’s the truth, and I’m not about to deprive Brendan of that truth, no matter how uncertain our future is.
‘And I with her. But I know this kind of stuff is the fair-weather side of parenting. Anyone can have fun in a pool on a sunny day.’ He kisses my temple.
‘I promise you, sweetheart, I’m going to prove to you that I’m capable of sticking around for the tough stuff, too.
I’m not going anywhere, and I’m willing to wait for as long as it takes to prove to you that I will never let you and Tabs down. Ever .’