Chapter 20 #3
“Oh goodness,” Quinn adds, getting to her feet. “I hear the bus. Perfect timing.” She turns to me, though she releases her hold of my hand, she presses it to my chest, lightly grabbing my T-shirt. “Babe, would you mind bringing the four-wheeler around for Charles and Marnie? That way it’s ready.”
I look at the people I used to be related to.
Charles wears a casual smile, and I cannot see that man taking any real part in raising a child.
He can’t truly want Sadie in his life every day.
It’s cruel, what they’re doing to me, and playing nice feels like an extra punishment.
But I know Quinn and Tate are right. I have to go along with it until it’s over.
Until we’ve convinced them that Sadie is indeed better off here, with me.
With us.
“Miss Quinn!” Sadie’s voice echoes through the halls, bringing a rush of levity and happiness to my chest. A smile quirks my lips as I edge toward the back door, trying to obey Quinn but wanting to hug my girl, too. With the Montgomerys here, I’ve never wanted to hug Sadie more.
“Miss Quinn, look!” Sadie crashes against Quinn’s chest, wrapping her arms around her waist, cheek pressed to Quinn’s stomach as she clings to a tattered sheet of paper. Mid-squeeze, her eyes drift to mine, and she beams up at me. “Daddy! I passed my test!”
I drop to my knee and collect my girl when she slips from Quinn and runs to me, slamming into my chest the way I love.
Her little hands collect behind my neck, and she drags the tip of her nose against mine.
“I spelled my name, first and last, wrote my address rightly, and I knew your phone number!”
“Correctly,” I correct, “and I’m so proud of you. Good job, Sadie. I knew you could remember all that.” I smile at her as Quinn quietly takes the paper from Sadie’s hand and sticks it to the fridge.
Sadie twists in my arms, hunting for Quinn, when she spots them.
She steps back, her little brown boot coming over the top of mine, her hands searching my thighs until she finds my hands.
I hold hers, and she steps onto my feet as I stand, and I recognize this as her seeking security in me.
Don’t matter how many rodeos a man wins, there is no better feeling than being sought out for safety and comfort from your little girl.
“Sadie, do you remember Marnie and Charles? Mr. and Mrs. Montgomery,” I explain, adding, “the folks who send you cards sometimes. They’re here now, and they want to see you for a visit.”
Sadie’s grip around my fingers tightens, and she casts a worried look toward Quinn.
“Do you remember?” I ask her.
She shakes her head.
Quinn comes to stand with us, crouching to meet Sadie’s eyeline. “Maybe the four of us could take the four-wheeler to the wishing well and you can show them how you make wishes,” Quinn offers, adding, “I’ll let you steer if you sit in my lap.”
Sadie doesn’t ask if I’m joining, because she clearly feels safe in Quinn’s company. And though our marriage isn’t real, the trust and safety is.
“Okay,” Sadie agrees, then finally looks up at me again. “You ridin’ today, Daddy?”
I nod my head. “I surely am, sweetheart. Mr. Tate is bringing over a bronc for me to practice on. And later tonight, we’re going to the rodeo grounds to practice. And guess what? Miss Quinn is packin’ a picnic so you and her can watch me.”
She claps her hands together, and I swear to my maker, I’ve never been hit with the urge to spontaneously break down until this very moment.
Even after losing Amelia, I was focused because I had to be, for my child’s sake.
I’ve remained focused on chores and priorities for the last few years.
There’s no time to indulge in your pain when you’re struggling to make ends meet.
But right now, the pure happiness radiating from my daughter is doing something to me.
I want her to have this feeling forever, to keep this broad, unending happiness in her heart.
This is what life should be like for her.
This is what she deserves. And I couldn’t pull myself out of the struggle to find it.
Now I’ve given her something I’ve already planned on stealing away.
I’m terrible.
“Hon?” Quinn’s hand curves my shoulder, gripping me.
I shake my head. “I’m sorry, what?”
“We’re gonna go for a ride. Gonna show the Montgomerys the land and we’ll be back. An hour or so?” Her green eyes flit between mine.
I nod. “Okay.”
She holds the back door open as Charles guides Marnie through, and Sadie bullets outside after them, skipping and laughing, talking a million miles a minute. I catch Quinn’s wrist and tug her back to me, placing a short but deep kiss on her lips because I can’t help myself.
“Thank you,” I breathe, knowing a kiss doesn’t begin to chip at the surface of what I owe her, but it’s all I can give for now. “I appreciate you, Quinn. I do.”
She winks. “Anything for you two.” And then she’s gone, and I’m left doing chores with Tate, Petunia and Alice on our heels.
I love having the kids around while we work, and what’s more, today I’m dreamin’ up another few sets of bare feet out here, imagining Love and Quinn coming out with round bellies and sweet tea.
A man can dream.