Chapter 26
?
— Dutch —
Istood outside Indira’s apartment for the second time in two days. But, this time, I knew exactly what I was going to say.
She answered the door looking tired—dark circles under her eyes, hair pulled back in a messy bun, the soft gray robe from Sunday wrapped around her like armor. But when she saw me, something in her expression shifted.
“I wasn’t expecting you.”
“I know. But there’s something I need to tell you, and it can’t wait.”
She studied me for a long moment, then stepped aside.
The box was still on her coffee table. Both cuts visible through the half-open lid. I forced myself not to look at them as I sat down on her couch.
Indira didn’t sit. She stood near the kitchen, arms crossed, watching me with guarded eyes.
“I went to Louisville,” I said. “Club business—the expansion deal we’ve been working on. I flew, which you probably don’t know is a big deal in MC culture. We ride. Flying means you’re desperate.”
“Were you? Desperate?”
“To get back to you.” I met her eyes. “To fix this.”
She didn’t respond, just waited.
“While I was gone, I did a lot of thinking. About what you said. About my first instinct being to control rather than trust.” I took a breath.
“You were right. When I saw those photos of you, my immediate thought wasn’t to tell you everything.
It was to manage the situation. Keep you safe through ignorance. That’s not the man I want to be.”
“Photos?” Her voice sharpened. “What photos?”
“That’s what I came to tell you.” I leaned forward, resting my elbows on my knees. “The Wolves—they’re a rival MC. They’ve been trying to undermine us for years. Crystal called them after your confrontation, she gave them one piece of information: that you matter to me.”
Indira’s face went pale.
“They sent us a message. Three photos of you—going into your building, at the coffee shop, in the parking lot at Murphy’s.
They’ve been surveilling all the club officers, looking for weaknesses.
Probably had dozens of photos of you before Crystal called, but they didn’t know who you were.
Just some woman I’d been seen with. Her call told them you mattered.
” I paused to let that sink in. “They’re trying to use you as leverage to force us into a deal we can’t make. ”
“They...” She shook her head slowly. “People have been following me? Taking pictures?”
“Yes.”
“And you knew about this Saturday night. But Sunday morning, you came to me with vague warnings about a situation.” Her voice hardened. “You saw photos of me being stalked and still didn’t tell me the truth.”
“I know.” I didn’t try to defend myself. “That’s why I’m here now.”
She turned away, staring out the window. When she spoke, her voice was quiet. “What exactly is your club involved in, Jacob?”
This was it. The moment of truth.
“Gun running.” I said it flatly, no hedging. “We transport weapons for private buyers. It’s the main source of the club’s income..”
Indira went very still.
“The ATF has been watching us for years. They haven’t been able to pin anything concrete, but they’re getting closer.
” I continued before I could lose my nerve.
“The Wolves want to take over our Montana operation. They can’t compete with us, so they’re trying to destabilize us instead. That’s why they targeted you.”
“Gun running.” She said the words like she was testing them. “You run guns.”
“Yes.”
“Illegal weapons.”
“Mostly legal weapons sold through channels that don’t require background checks. But yes, some of them end up in places they shouldn’t.”
She was quiet for a long time. I watched her back, saw the tension in her shoulders, the way her hands gripped her elbows.
“Why are you telling me this now?” she finally asked. “Club business, remember? You couldn’t tell me before.”
“We had an emergency church today. Told the brothers I needed to tell you the truth. That I couldn’t lie to you anymore, even if it meant violating club rules.”
She turned to face me. “And they agreed?”
“They voted on it.” I met her eyes. “But yes. They agreed.”
“Why?”
“Because I told them I’d rather be voted out than keep lying to you.” I paused. “And because Glitch pointed out that if you were going to betray us, you would have done it already. When you caught me with Crystal, you could have gone to the cops with stuff you’ve seen and heard. You didn’t.”
Something flickered in her expression—surprise, maybe, or recognition.
“I’m telling you this because you deserve the truth,” I continued.
“And because I trust you. If you can’t handle this world—if knowing who I really am and what I do is too much—I understand.
I won’t blame you for walking away.” I paused.
“But you deserve to make that choice with real information. Not lies.”
She was quiet again, processing. I waited, giving her space.
“You run guns,” she said finally. “Rival gangs—”
“MCs.”
″—rival MCs are threatening me to get to you.” She shook her head slowly. “This is not what I signed up for, Jacob.”
“I know.”
“You’re telling me that my life involves violent criminals and people taking photos of me to use as leverage.”
“Yes.”
“And you’ve known this the whole time. This is the world you’ve always lived in, and I was just... floating on the surface of it. Thinking I understood who you were.”
“You understood who I was. You just didn’t know what I did.”
She laughed bitterly. “That’s quite a distinction.”
“It is, though.” I leaned forward. “I’m the same man who burned that mattress, who destroyed that desk, who’s trying to become someone worthy of you. The gun running doesn’t change that. It’s just... the context I exist in.”
“The context that’s threatening my life.”
“Yes.” I couldn’t deny it. “And I’m sorry. I’m sorry that loving me puts you in danger. I’m sorry that the life I’ve built has consequences that touch you. But I’m not sorry for telling you the truth, even if it means you decide to leave.”
Indira walked to the couch and sat down, not next to me but on the far end. Her eyes were fixed on the leather box.
“You risked your position in the club,” she said slowly. “You told them you’d rather be voted out than lie to me?”
I nodded.
“Why?”
“Because you were right.” I shifted to face her more fully.
“When you confronted me about keeping secrets, you said my first instinct was to control rather than trust. And you were right. When things got hard, I fell back into old patterns. I decided what you could and couldn’t handle instead of letting you decide for yourself.
” I paused. “That’s not the man I want to be. That’s not the partner you deserve.”
She was quiet, her fingers tracing the edge of the box with the cuts in it.
“So you’re choosing honesty,” she said. “Even though it could cost you everything.”
“I’m choosing you.” I met her eyes. “I’m choosing to be the man who trusts you with the truth, even when the truth is ugly. Because if I can’t do that, then everything I did doesn’t mean anything. It’s just window dressing on the same broken foundation.”
She opened the box and looked at both cuts.
“I’m angry,” she said quietly. “I’m angry that you waited until I confronted you to tell me this. I’m angry that your first instinct was to protect me by lying. I’m angry that the world you live in is so dangerous that loving you means constantly looking over my shoulder.”
I waited, barely breathing.
“But I’m also...” She shook her head. “I’m also recognizing that you came back. You risked your standing in the club to be honest with me.” She looked up at me. “That means something.”
“Does it mean you forgive me?”
“I still need time to process.” She closed the box again. “Everything you’ve told me changes the equation. I need to think about whether I can build a life with someone in your world. Knowing what I now know.”
Time. The word landed like a fist to the chest. She wanted time, and time was the one thing I couldn’t give her. Somewhere out there, the Wolves were counting down the hours, and every minute Indira spent in this apartment was a minute she was exposed.
“The deadline is tonight, Indira.” I leaned forward. “Come back to my house with me. You can have it to yourself. I’ll stay at the clubhouse. But I need to know you’re somewhere secure.”
She hesitated, and I saw the fear she’d been hiding crack through her composure.
“You’ve got prospects on me,” she said. “I’ve seen them. They’re out there right now, aren’t they?”
“Yes. But prospects in a parking lot aren’t the same as you being behind compound walls with armed brothers on every corner.” I held her gaze. “I’m not asking you to make any decisions about our future tonight. I’m asking you to let me keep you safe while you think.”
She didn’t answer. But I watched her face as the silence stretched—watched her weigh independence against reality, pride against fear. And underneath all of it, I saw something that looked like fear she was trying to hide.
“Why weren’t you at work today?” I asked.
Something flickered across her expression. “Something felt off this morning. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but...” She shrugged. “I called in. Stayed home.”
“Your instincts were right. They were watching you.” I leaned forward. “Please, Indira. One night. That’s all I’m asking. Tomorrow, when this is resolved one way or another, you can go wherever you want. But tonight—let me know you’re protected.”
She was quiet for a long moment. I watched her weigh it—her pride against her fear, her need for independence against the reality of what I’d just told her.
“Your house,” she said finally. “Not the clubhouse.”
“My house,” I confirmed. “I won’t set foot inside unless you ask me to.”
“And tomorrow I can leave.”
“Tomorrow you can do whatever you want. I won’t stop you.”
She nodded slowly. “Okay. Let me pack a bag.”