Chapter 6
Lacy
The guys had gotten back from their run last night and after they secured whatever it was they had in the truck, they came to the clubhouse and found us hanging around.
Some commotion erupted when Falcon pulled out a ring and presented it to Daisy. We all knew it was coming; we just didn’t know when. I couldn’t help but rush to her and pull her close. She was already his Old Lady, which for the club meant more than being a wife, but we had only been here a short time and it was still a big deal to get married.
Most of the bunnies bombarded her with hugs and questions, and Falcon got lots of handshakes and a few shots. The women all settled into a few tables together after grabbing drinks. We spent a while chatting and getting buzzed.
After some of the other ladies got their fill of the chatter, Daisy grabbed my hand, and her blue eyes sparkled. “Lacy, I need you to come with me tomorrow.”
“Are we going somewhere? Thank God!” I exclaimed. I had only left the clubhouse a handful of times, and that was mostly when we first arrived. I was desperate to see new surroundings.
“The courthouse. Bright and early. There’s no sense in a real wedding because everyone here is my family now. But I still want you to be with me.”
Tears flooded my eyes. “Of course I’ll go with you! I wonder if any of the girls have a dress I can borrow.”
Mama Hen chimed in. “Penny does. I’ll have her put a few out in the living room. You can come by later and take a look.”
“Thank you. I hope it’s not a pain for her.” Penny didn’t really hang around the clubhouse. There seemed to be a bit of an age gap between Hawk and Penny, and she wasn’t like the other women around. She went to one of the universities nearby and mostly stayed in their house on the property. I saw her drive off a lot of times, and she always waved if I was outside, but the longest I’d seen her around was when we had the memorial for Raven, which seemed more like a celebration. “What about you? You gonna wear white?”
Daisy laughed and put her arm around me. “I think that ship has sailed. But we’d been talking about this, so I ordered a few dresses. I’ll see which one I feel like in the morning.”
We talked a while longer before Mama Hen came to get me. “Hey, hon. I’m getting tired. Why don’t you come on and take a look at these dresses.”
Looking around, I found Eagle standing over near the darts, so I gave a little wave and motioned that I was following Mama Hen. He held up his beer, so I figured it was fine to go.
The sun had gone down but there were torches around the property that made it easy to see where you were walking. I’d only been inside Mama Hen’s house once, when we first arrived. It was for a girl chat, really. She just wanted to talk, make sure I was comfortable, had what I needed, and asked me some questions. She didn’t press me when I was reluctant to give too much info, though. She just smiled and told me a little story about her and her life at the club.
It was a cute little house, two stories, grey with white shutters, and a covered porch that spanned the length of the front. Some of the guys painted the front porch white last week and it really brightened the look of the house. It was just stained wood before.
The porch light was on, along with a light shining out through the windows. Inside, it was cute and cozy. It was all a stark contrast to the clubhouse and definitely had a woman’s touch. The clubhouse had bachelor biker men written all over it from the billiards to the extensive gaming system collection. Although, I’d gotten pretty good at some of the video games. I didn’t have shit else to do all day besides help Mama Hen with food and cleaning up around the clubhouse. There’s only so many romcoms one can watch.
“Ah, she picked out some good ones,” Mama Hen said.
Penny came down the stairs with a bag in her hand. She had straight hair, nearly black, and it was pulled into a high ponytail. Her eyes were just like her mom’s and Hawk’s–blue as a clear sky. She was petite like me which worked out nicely since I needed to borrow something. “Hi. Thought you may need some shoes. Not sure of your size but these are sevens,” Penny said as she dropped the bag on the same sofa as the dresses.
“Perfect. Thank you so much. Kinda short notice and hard to go shopping when you have no car or money,” I said with a chuckle. It wasn’t really funny, but I had gotten used to brushing things off with a laugh. It somehow made it all less sad.
Penny’s brows pinched. “Well, if you need a ride anywhere, you let me know.” Mama Hen exchanged a tense glance with her, but Penny crossed her arms as a grimace formed on her delicate features. “I have studying to do. Just take whatever you like,” Penny said before she stomped up the stairs.
I started thumbing through the pile of dresses. They were stacked on each other, still on the hangers. I got to one with a sweet floral pattern with lots of shades of blues and pinks. It was a cute summer dress, but this was a courthouse wedding. Plus, I didn’t want anything too fancy to take away from Daisy. It was her special day, even if it was a small ceremony and probably a rowdy party at the clubhouse after.
“That’s a nice one,” Mama Hen said as she pulled out some strappy sandals with a wedge heel. “These would look great with it.”
“Oh, tall shoes, how I missed you,” I crooned at the cute sandals. “She’s a little firecracker, huh?”
“Penny? Yeah, well, growing up around this, it’s hard not to be. She has a lot of opinions about things.” Mama Hen rolled her eyes.
Same, Penny. Same. “I guess this is all I needed. Thanks for arranging it, since I literally have no way of taking care of anything for myself.” I let out a huge breath through puffed cheeks.
Mama Hen came closer, and I instinctively stepped back. I still loved her, but she did slap me the other day.
She grinned and gently grabbed my wrist, since my hands were full. “I’m sorry I slapped you, but you needed it. Have you talked to him?”
Biting my lip, I asked, “When do you suppose I should do that? He was gone ‘til a little bit ago and hasn’t really been available to talk to since then.”
“Honey, you’re only hurting yourself the longer you drag this out.”
I nodded, my chest tightening at the thought of this talk I needed to have with him. “I think I know what he’ll say, and that’s why I’ve put it off. Ignorance is bliss, right?”
“But is it? You don’t seem very blissful. I’m not telling you to hurt any of my boys or take advantage, but I don’t like my girls being hurt either, whether it was on purpose or not. I can’t fix this for you; only you can do that.”
“I don’t know if talking will fix anything. I think it’ll just make it more complicated.” Clear for knowledge purposes, complicated to my heart.
“You think on it, and I’m here if you need to talk.” She hugged me then walked me to the door. The offer to be available to talk gave me the impression she knew how it would go, too. Not well.
The air felt heavier outside than before I went to Mama Hen’s. I trudged my way back to the clubhouse to find Eagle with the glow of the torches leading the way. I didn’t think I had the gumption to talk tonight, so I needed to see if he was ready to go up to his room or hang a while longer. I was exhausted, but not from lack of sleep. All this chatter about having a deep discussion with him the last couple of days had my mind in overdrive. He had mentioned a few times being tired as well, and Daisy said he asked her not to fill any cancellations at the shop.
They’d been going out a lot late at night and he’d come back wound up, seeming like an animal stalking his prey when he found me. He didn’t talk about what happened, but sometimes his knuckles would be busted up, his clothes may be dirty, and I found a lot of blood stains when I did his laundry. The bunnies did a lot of the guys’ laundry; it was one of their chores since they got to stay for free. But I didn’t like the idea of another woman cleaning up after me, or touching Eagle’s nice little boxer-briefs.
Maybe that’s why he was so distant? He worked at the shop for long hours and sitting like that had to hurt your back. Then there were all the local nighttime runs they made. Plus, he just had a long ride in a short time. Things happened so fast and had been going just as fast ever since that. Maybe he just hadn’t had time to slow down and enjoy himself?
When I walked into the clubhouse, I looked around but didn’t see him anywhere. Daisy was still sitting amongst a few women, so I walked over. “Did you see Eagle?”
Jeannie turned around. She was one of the bunnies that didn’t always stick around. She had a place of her own but stayed here if she had too much to drink. She was drop dead gorgeous and sweet as pie with very light, obviously not natural, blonde hair. It wasn’t over processed, though. She probably had a nice salon she went to. She was also petite like me. Daisy wasn’t thick, really, but she was much more toned and stood about an inch taller than Jeannie and I. Jeannie’s big brown doe eyes looked up and she pointed to the stairs. “He said he was calling it a night.”
I smiled, hoping it looked like a smile and not an annoyed smirk. He couldn’t wait for me? “I’m beat, too. I was hoping he’d be ready for bed. I’ll be ready bright and early.”
“Oh wait, is that the dress you picked out? Let me see,” Daisy said as she stood to come closer.
I grabbed the hanger and held it up for them to see the cute A-line dress with cap sleeves. “And the shoes,” I said as I dangled them around.
“You’re gonna be the prettiest one there!” Daisy said as she pulled me close. She whispered in my ear, “Are you okay?”
I pulled back and cleared my throat, hoping the pressure would subside. Why was it if you weren’t okay and someone asked if you were, you’d practically lose your shit? But I was well practiced to hold it in. What was another night of faking a smile? “I’m just tired. And I need to get some beauty rest so I don’t scare anyone tomorrow.” I waved to everyone else and headed upstairs.
When I gingerly opened the door, I found Eagle already passed out. The light was off in the room, but the bathroom light was on and the door was cracked. At least he left a little light on for me. Most of the rooms had one little window but even the moonlight couldn’t get past his blackout curtains.
I hung the dress in the bathroom, peed, and took my shoes, bra, and jeans off in the bathroom, hanging the bra on the same hanger as the dress. After grabbing my discarded clothes and shoes, I flicked the switch off and tiptoed out of the bathroom. Once my eyes adjusted, I put my jeans in the small hamper by the closet, and put both pairs of shoes next to it on the floor.
Being nimble and quiet, I slipped into bed and tried to get comfortable without moving too much. Once I settled and closed my eyes, an arm reached out and dragged me across the bed. When he had me neatly tucked against him, he stopped moving so I closed my eyes again once more and fought the urge to grab his hand, instead tucking it between my cheek and pillow. Knowing I’d probably have the talk sooner rather than later, I didn’t need to fool myself with fake intimacy.