Chapter 3
Hawk
C arter Cahill was taller than me, but then most fully grown men were. At least that was how it felt like a lot of the time. I had no height complex, I knew being on the shorter side was an advantage in what I did. Horses didn’t care either way, all they cared about was your aura.
Cahill was also an idiot. Although on some level it was gratifying to see him think Russ was me, just because Russ was bigger and older. The double-take was kind of funny, but everything about Cahill felt like tiny grains of sand under my skin from the get go.
His clothing was fine for the first visit.
The chinos and some loafer type shoes with a designer T-shirt.
Yeah, not exactly ranch wear. He’d also need a hat if he was going to visit more.
I needed him to, down the line, because I wasn’t going to give the mare to him unless he’d done some of the work to get to know her.
As I’d supposed, he didn’t like her name. But at least he’d understood that she really knew it and would respond to it. I couldn’t affect what he’d do once they were eventually off the property, but for now, she was Ramona and he was an entitled asshole.
Before I could grab an ATV, Mal rolled his truck to a stop next to the utility vehicles we had by the training barn.
“Hop in!”
I did as I was told, and tried hard not to let the anxiety take me. Reading me just right, Mal didn’t say anything, he just grabbed my hand and squeezed.
When he drove to the house, I frowned. “Why are we here?”
“Are you going to go like that?” he gestured at my dusty clothing.
I grimaced. “Good point.” Then it hit me that he was wearing clean jeans and a T-shirt that definitely hadn’t been near any horses.
Seeing my confusion, he chuckled. “It’s my day off. Crew’s taking Payton to the library. You and I are following whomever is going to the hospital. Then once we’re done with our shift, Crew’s taking over.”
That made complete sense, so I just nodded and jumped out of the truck.
I raced through the oddly empty house to my room in the attic where I’d moved as soon as Bodhi left for basic training when I was nine. It was a testament to what kind of a man Crew was, because as the second oldest at fifteen, he could’ve just told everyone he was taking the room.
Instead, he knew that I was different from everyone else.
I had nine siblings, and I was the only one who really disliked being part of such a large group of kids.
I loved each and every one of my sisters and brothers more than life itself, but I just needed to be left in my own company more than anyone else.
I changed my clothes and the more the clock ticked forward, the more the silent house unnerved me. This had never been what my parents wanted. There was a reason they’d had ten kids. Now that there were grandkids to spoil, they were even happier.
If I hadn’t had the attic, I would’ve moved out ages ago. I had contemplated getting a little trailer somewhere on the property and I might still do that eventually, but Mom and Dad loved having as many of us as possible at the house still.
With the youngest set of twins and Isley studying elsewhere and Demi in town, they were down to six kids here.
Although Crew lived in a cabin and I was pretty sure that when he and Mal moved in together—they needed an extension to Crew’s cabin because they had Payton who needed space—Bodhi would likely move into Mal’s old cabin.
So technically it was just going to be me, Emery, Fern, and Gemma at the house soon.
My brain was spinning by the time I went down the stairs. Yeah, ten kids were definitely too many.
As I climbed into the truck and Mal started the engine, I guffawed.
“What?”
“I was going through the list of Harringtons. I just realized there’s going to be four grandkids instead of two by the time this is over.”
Mal was silent for a moment, and when I glanced at him, he was smiling. There was still that sort of awe in his expression, because he wasn’t used to having a family as big as ours. But I guessed what got to him the most was that Payton had a new set of grandparents in my folks.
They’d pulled Malachi and Payton into the fold, and then when Mal’s mom Fiona had visited, they’d just absorbed her, too. Once Fiona’s sister, Mal’s Aunt Winifred, visited eventually, they’d do the same to her.
We were halfway into town, when both of our phones buzzed at the same time.
“It’s Luke. They’ve made it to Colorado Springs.”
“Okay. Good.”
The drive took a little over an hour, and we drove in silence. By the time we made it to UCHealth Memorial, we were all directed into one big waiting room. They’d wheeled Demi somewhere with Luke and Emery in tow, since the latter refused to leave his twin’s side.
“Bet he’s driving the doctors bonkers,” Fern snickered next to me.
I took a headcount and for the time being, it seemed like only Bodhi, Crew, and Gemma were missing from action.
“We taking turns?” I asked Fern since she was the closest.
“Yeah, Bodhi said he had something to do and would get here as soon as possible.”
Maybe thirty minutes later, the door to the room opened and Emery walked in. He looked upset, but in that annoyed way that suggested he’d probably been kicked out.
“Mom?”
Mom was already out of her seat and embraced him on her way to Demi.
Emery went to a chair, then turned around and didn’t sit. He ran his fingers through his hair.
“She’s fine so far as are the babies. This might take a while, so if anyone has anywhere to be, she said—”
“Absolutely not,” I said firmly. “Goddamn Cahill and his horse are at the ranch, and I won’t miss this even for them.”
Everyone looked at me, and just like that, nobody had anything else to say.
Another half an hour went past as we waited, and then my phone buzzed.
It was Russ. I groaned.
Mal raised a brow at me.
“Cahill’s going to wherever he’s staying and coming back tomorrow,” I explained.
“How did he seem?” Dad asked from where he was sitting in a recliner, trying to seem as if he wasn’t worried at all. He fooled absolutely no one.
I shrugged. “Wealthy city boy who doesn’t really have any respect for my skills so far.” It felt weird to call a man in his early-to-mid forties a boy but oh well.
“Did he think Russ was you?” Dad made an educated guess.
I smirked.
“What?” Mal asked, clearly confused. “How is that possible?”
“I don’t know. I mean I have a hunch. I had a couple of people messaging me before all of this started that his PA”—there were a couple of snorts around the room—“was asking around to see if I was as good as everyone says. So maybe he didn’t actually do any of his own research or something.
But his expression was kind of priceless when he realized who I was. ”
Dad chuckled. “Good luck with him.”
Sighing, I grunted, “Thanks.”
Fern and Dad went to see Demi next. When they came out with Luke, the dad-to-be told Mal, Emery, and me to go hang out with Demi and Mom so they’d be suitably distracted while Luke went to get something to eat in the cafeteria.
We did as we were told, of course, and the room they’d put Demi in was pretty packed with the four of us there.
Mal went to give her a kiss on the cheek as he glanced at the… whatever you called the thing attached to her stomach that measured something.
“Dr. Gomez says it all looks good,” she explained, and Mal relaxed.
“When Payton was born, he was a bit early too,” Mal explained and then went to sit on the loveseat next to Mom.
Emery went to stare at her monitor, because of course he did. Demi rolled her eyes, then rode out a contraction. Sadly I’d taken her hand just before, and I had to hide a wince when I felt how the small bones were grinding together.
Once her expression smoothened again, she pulled me closer and I gave her a hug.
I was probably closest with Gemma because she worked with me, but Demi was my oldest sister and that was special.
“We’ll be fine,” she murmured into my ear.
I hadn’t realized how much I needed to hear that. I let out a breath, and she patted my back.
“It’s going to be okay, Hawk. I promise. I have a good feeling.”
“Yeah. Okay.” She was the first of my siblings to have had a baby before, so this was technically my second time going through this thing.
When our three youngest brothers had been born, I’d been too little to remember much.
I didn’t remember Isley being born at all, but I did remember Keegan and Judson, because they were twins and they’d been loud.
Also they’d been in the hospital for a bit and I remembered going to visit Mom and them during that time.
“So, Dad said Goddamn Cahill is in town?” Demi asked as I sat on the chair next to her.
“Everyone shut up!” Emery barked sharply enough for us to go quiet. He looked at the readings and closed his eyes as he concentrated on the ka-thump of what I assumed were the babies’ heartbeat or heartbeats.
Without explaining, he went to press the call button attached to the bed railing next to Demi’s hand.
“It’s probably nothing, but—”
“But I trust you,” Demi said, and they did that thing where they pressed their foreheads together.
We’d always joked that they did a mind meld, but sometimes that didn’t feel far from the truth.
“I texted Luke,” Mom said calmly.
I tended to forget that she’d given birth more than most women ever did and had the experience of two sets of twins.
Something anxious bubbled up in my chest though, and Mal stood up.
“Come on, kiss your sister and then we can go back to the waiting room,” he murmured for my ears only.
I went to Demi and she gave me a brave smile. “I promised.”
“You did.” I kissed her cheek and put my hand on her belly for a moment, right next to that weird thing.
“See you on the flip side?” she asked, grinning a little.
“Yeah, definitely.”
“If this takes a while, go home. Get rest. So you don’t murder Cahill.”
I chuckled. “Okay. I’ll try.”
It turned out that whatever hunch Emery had, it was correct. An hour later, Demi was taken into a C-section, because Twin A’s heartbeat was… not right. It was either too slow or too fast, and they weren’t going to take risks with that.
Another hour, and Mom texted everyone that the twins were here.
Since they were going straight into the NICU, we also got a video where Luke was holding two tiny bundles in his arms.
“Okay, Emery, you take this one,” he said and Emery carefully extracted one of the babies.
Luke made eye contact with the camera. “Since Demi is in recovery, I guess it’s up to me to introduce these two to the family. This one”—he nodded at the baby in the crook of his arm—“is Phinneas Michael. With a PH and two Ns.”
Mom, who was filming, made a choked up noise.
“And the one Emery is holding, he’s Emerson Russell.” Before my brother could ask, Luke turned to him and said, “Yes. We considered Emery, but we decided on Emerson.”
The way Emery’s eyes filled with tears and Mom’s camerawork became shaky made me sniffle.
Mom forgot all about filming, and the rest of us who were all watching the video on various phones chuckled.
“Those are some solid names,” Mal said, wiping his eyes.
The door to the waiting room opened and Bodhi stepped in. “Did I miss it?”
Since nobody but the parents were going to be able to see the babies once they were in the NICU, everyone but Emery left the hospital.
Mom needed to feed people—it was like therapy to her—and everyone else had work to do.
For the rest of the evening, there were plenty of messages in the group chat from everyone, and I sent a message to Luke, asking for a private message if anything big went on, because I was going to mute the conversation for now.
We had a quick dinner and then I went to check up on Ramona.
She was calmly eating her hay in her stall, and I wondered how things would go with her. She had a good solid build and she was smart. Suzanne had said she’d done really well being trained when younger, but the whole broodmare thing had changed their goals.
Right up until they got Cahill’s offer and they decided to let her go. And now she was my problem.
Not that I expected any actual issues. The issue might end up being her owner.
Cahill clearly didn’t like me, because I was in charge. He hadn’t understood it yet. There was a reason why I had the reputation I did, and part of that had come with not bowing to money or older men.
Now, I could admit that older men were my type. In another situation the fact that Cahill was about six feet tall and fit in that way that told me he lifted weights but hadn’t gotten to the annoying and impractical gym bro shape would’ve been interesting.
He wasn’t bad looking. He had the kind of classically handsome face that had probably gotten better as he aged with charming crow’s feet and all.
Well, at least he’d be nice to look at while I ignored the bullshit he would no likely spout at times. The rest of the time I hoped he’d just do as he was told and not talk.
There was no chance of that happening, but a guy could hope.
The next day, around nine in the morning, I was in the arena with one of our rescues.
The gelding had been severely neglected and was very easily spooked by people he didn’t know and things that were new to him.
He’d put on some weight in the month we’d had him, and we’d even gotten his hooves and teeth treated to a point where I was happy to work with him.
He was nothing special on the outside. Just a dark bay with a spot of white on his nose that extended down to his bottom lip, as if he’d been dipped into a bucket of milk.
We were doing some basic leadwork. I walked and stopped.
Jogged and stopped. Turned quickly. Then slowly.
All the while staying in tune with him. He was doing great and responding to the pieces of apple I was giving him.
He wasn’t much for carrots, but not all horses were.
I preferred carrots because they didn’t get mushy in my pockets or the treat bag clipped to my belt, but whatever worked.
At one point, the gelding jerked his head sharply.
I saw it in my peripheral, but thought nothing of it.
I just continued to work, until I felt he was almost done for the day.
Almost. That was the key word here. You never worked any animal until they were done.
You stopped when they would still have a positive view of the whole experience.
It wasn’t until I stopped and led him into the middle of the arena and gave him the rest of my apples and let him go for a roll if he so wished, that I realized we were being watched.
Cahill stood at the gate. He didn’t seem impressed. I could only speculate what I’d done that pissed him off right then. Sighing, I gathered the lead rope, turned my ball cap the right way around to shield my face from the sun again and walked over to him.
“Morning.” There. That was a regular greeting. I could be civilized.