Chapter 5
Ava
The weekend rolled around and I couldn’t put it off any longer. I had to pay a visit to Justin and meet his new wife. If I didn’t go today, it wouldn’t look very family-like of me.
Don’t ask me why, but I went without calling first. Maybe I hoped they wouldn’t be home. I don’t know. Visiting them threw me into a bundle of quivering nerves. I hadn’t seen Justin in over a year, and then there were those few times when I’d fiercely berated him.Yes, I apologized but it had all been over him dating Terri. When she died, I was miserable over what I’d done. What did one say to a brother they hadn’t seen for that long and had been extremely hateful to? And then, what would I say to his new wife? Nice to meet you was over in a blink.
Before I chickened out, I hopped in the taxi and gave the driver the address. When the cab pulled up to their house, he asked if I wanted him to pull into their driveway. I told him no. It was gated and I was embarrassed. What if Justin’s wife was there and didn’t let me in because we had never met? What if I scared her or something?
Yeah, this was probably a bad idea. I should’ve called first.
There was an intercom-buzzer thingy on the gate, so I pushed it and waited a few minutes. When no one answered, I started to walk away but I stopped. Where the heck would I go. I had absolutely no idea where I was. I opened the Maps app on my phone to decide if I should order an Uber. This didn’t look like a place where taxis usually hung out.
Suddenly, I heard this soft voice ask, “Can I help you?”
“Awwhk!” I wasn’t expecting that thing to talk.
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah, sorry about that. You scared me is all. Anyhoo, I’m Avery Middleton. Is this the Middleton residence?”
“Justin’s sister, Avery?”
“The one and only.”
“What a surprise. Come in, please.”
Did I imagine shock in her voice or was it just plain old surprise? Let’s find out, then, shall we?
The gate slid open, so I mustered up my courage and waddled through it.
This place was amazing. Grand, huge, unreal. Not really the Justin I knew, but oh well. I huffed my way up the circular driveway, which wasn’t exactly short, and then up the steps to the front double doors. Charleston was a flat city with no hills in sight, unlike Seattle. I wasn’t used to all the climbing up and up. I reached out to ring the bell when the door was opened by a tiny blonde-haired woman. She was shorter and way thinner too. Well, let’s be honest. Everyone was way thinner than me these days. But she was super tiny, and I was super jealous.
I was still catching my breath when I bellowed, “Hi!” Did my booming voice just echo throughout the whole house? I never really thought I had a booming voice before. “I’m Avery. But lots of people call me Ava. But that’s back in Charleston because my grandmother is also Avery. She’s Big Avery and I’m Little Avery. Well, I’m not so little anymore.” I bent my head in and kind of whispered that part. I’m not sure why because it wasn’t like it was exactly a secret or anything. “Actually, we should probably change it to Big Avery and Extra-Large Avery. That would be more appropriate, I think. But, as I was saying, back in Charleston, lots of people call me Ava so as not to get us confused. Now that I’m in Seattle, I’m thinking about dropping the Ava and just going with Avery. What do you think?”
I finally took a good look at her, and her brows were all scrunched up as she gaped at me like a goldfish that had been tossed out of its bowl. Jeez, why did I ramble like that and not introduce myself like a normal person?
I stiffened my spine and raised myself up to my full height. “Well, you must be Caroline and I can’t tell you how pleased I am to meet you. I am so excited for you and Justin. Please forgive me, but if the truth be told, I’m super nervous about being here because it’s been a long time since I’ve seen Justin, and well, I just don’t know if he’ll even want to see me. And I’ve never met you and you know how that goes. I didn’t want you to hate me or anything. But I thought I’d stop by to visit you because …” I spread my arms out wide and sang, “Tada,” and then I made a comical face. “I’ve taken a job with SoftwarePlus and I’m relocating to Seattle. I’ve already started work this week. I got here on Monday, but I’ve been so busy I haven’t had time to call. Well, that’s not quite true. I was nervous about calling. I didn’t know if you’d even want to meet me or if Justin would want to see me. So, if either of you don’t, I can go. I’ll understand.” I made my funny face again.
What was it with these dorky faces I was making?
I was met with another odd look. Her brows were still scrunched but now her mouth had done it too. She stayed like that and maybe that expression had implanted there. One thing was sure—it wasn’t budging. Maybe it was there for life. Well, I wasn’t stupid. I could take a hint. She wanted me in her home about as much as she wanted a million fleas. Anyone who’s ever had a flea infestation knows exactly what I’m talking about.
“Okay, then. I guess that about wraps it up here. Will you tell Justin I said hey?” I patted her on her tiny shoulder right before I turned and shuffled down the steps, trying my best not to cry. I really didn’t know where the double hell I was. Should I go right or left? Did it matter? I just needed to get away from here because I didn’t want to wait for an Uber in front of their house. I made an instant decision and went left. I pushed my way through the exit gate and kept on going. A mere moment later, I was out of breath, huffing my way down the street. That’s what happens when you’re Extra-Large Avery. You can’t even run a half of a block before you feel like someone stole all your oxygen. And then the dreaded side stitch attacked. I bent in half, wheezing and trying to get rid of it. Jeez, I really needed to do something about this, because this was ridiculous. What if a murderer was chasing me? I may as well just open my arms and hug him for all the good my running away did.
Then I heard her call out, “Avery. Wait. Don’t go!”
I would’ve said something back, but I couldn’t spare any air, so I raised my arm instead.
She grabbed it and pulled me back toward the house, with me still bent over at the waist, trying to breathe. Of course, with me being Extra-Large Avery and her being Super Tiny Caroline, she didn’t pull me too far. When I was able to breathe again, I looked up, and well, I’ll be. I thought I had run so far, but it was only a few feet past the gate. What a loser.
And then she spoke. “I’m sorry you misunderstood. I was trying to process everything you said. Of course, we want to see you. And my word, Justin will be so happy to see his only sister. I can’t wait to see his face when he sees you!”
Finally, my lungs were able to work semi-properly again. “Really? You wouldn’t just be saying that, would you?” I gasped, still somewhat desperate for air.
“No, come on. He’s home now.”
“He is?” I was suddenly overwhelmed with an extraordinary case of nerves, so much so that my stomach started to rebel and began to make all sorts of odd noises.
Caroline looked at me and asked, “Are you okay?”
“I’m not sure.”
“Come on. There’s a bathroom right inside, just in case.” We headed back to the house.
She still held my arm and took me through the house that kept going and going. We finally ended up in a room with a humongous TV and there stood Justin talking with another man.
“Honey, look who’s here,” Caroline announced.
Justin turned around and so did the other man. I tried to give him a quick glance, but sweet heavens, he was really something. I forced myself to look away and focus on Justin, but he had this horrible expression on his face.
“Justin?” I half smiled. I couldn’t figure it out. I mean, yeah, I was a bit hefty, but was I that offensive looking?
“Ava? What are you doing here?” That was the most unwelcoming welcome I’d ever heard.
I sputtered out a response. “Uh, I, ah, er.” My mouth had gone suddenly bone dry. He kept staring at me with that awful look on his face. “I mean, um …”
Caroline came to my rescue saying, “Justin, your sister’s taken a new job in Seattle. Isn’t that wonderful?”
Justin’s eyes widened to the point where I wondered how his eyeballs didn’t roll out. His light tan face turned pallid, and then positively ghostly. I hope my visit didn’t kill him because he appeared to be heading in that direction. That was my signal it was time to leave.
In a voice that wasn’t my own, I said, “Yeah, I, uh, I’ve taken a job with SoftwarePlus. I’ll be living out here. But I won’t be a bother to you. I just wanted to stop by to say hey. So, ‘hey.’” I bent my knees a little, held a hand up in the air, and did a little wave like Queen Elizabeth used to. I turned around to make a hasty exit, only I didn’t know how to get the hell out of there. So, I just walked. I went down one hall until I hit a dead end. I turned around and went down another hall where it did the same. I finally found an exterior door and walked out to their backyard that had the most magnificent view of the water.
Fuck it all, I can’t even make a decent exit. I wandered around the yard, thinking that maybe it would lead me to the front, but it was walled off. I turned around and slammed right into Justin’s chest and then fell flat on my ass. I immediately broke down and cried. What the hell was wrong with me?
He extended his hand and helped me to my feet. Then his arms went around me and he didn’t say a word until my tears turned into the sniffles and I was making those awful gurfing noises. It was the most awkward thing ever.
“Better now?” he asked as he patted my back.
“How can someone who sounds like this be better?”
“That’s what Caroline always says. But why the tears, Ava?”
“I was humiliated. You looked at me like I’d grown an extra head. I know I’ve grown an extra stomach and maybe some extra thighs, but I still only have one head.” I sniffed back another round of tears.
“I was surprised. You were the last person I thought I’d see today. And there you stood. I was processing. You haven’t been around me in such a long time. You’re not used to my goofy-assed looks, you know. They’re usually disguised by a surgical mask too. I’m gonna have to make a note of that.”
“You’re not mad that I’m here?” My voice got higher with each word and ended with a squeak.
“You thought I was mad at you?”
“Yeah.” I sniffed and rubbed the tears off my cheeks as I didn’t have any tissues.
“Of course, I’m not mad.”
“Not even for all of our past crap?”
“Oh hell, Ava, that shit is so old. It’s been long gone for me.”
“Really?”
“Really. So, Seattle, huh?” he asked with a huge grin.
“Yeah. You should’ve seen Mom when I told her.”
He pulled back and looked me in the eye. “You did it yourself, with no one running interference?”
“Sure did.”
“Well, I’ll be damned. My baby sister is all grown up.”
We walked back into the house, arm in arm, stopping at a bathroom so I could clean my messy face. I resembled a raccoon, with mascara under my eyes and down my face. My nose was as red as a clown’s too. I grabbed a bunch of tissues and rubbed the mess off. That left me without an iota of makeup. There was nothing to be done about it now. After I ran my fingers through my hair and straightened it out some, I walked out and rejoined my brother.
“Do I look okay … I mean my face, not the rest of me because, well, I can’t really do anything about that now.”
“You look fine and stop putting yourself down. You’re still my beautiful baby sister.”
“Stop. You’re going to make me cry again.”
He took a step back and asked, “Ava, what’s happened to make you feel like this?”
I shrugged.
“You can tell me.”
Taking a deep breath, I gave him the short version. “It’s Mom. She’s always putting me down, telling me how fat I am. I suppose I took her words to heart.”
“Mom did that to you?”
“She’s always done that to me, only you boys never saw it because she always praised you.”
He took my arm and we walked to another room where we could sit. Then he said, “I never knew that. Mom can be difficult at times, I know, but I wasn’t aware she had a mean streak.”
“It got worse after Terri … you weren’t there to see. I mean you were there, but she always hid that side from you. After you moved here, she became increasingly worse. If it hadn’t been for Grams, I’m not sure I would’ve kept visiting there.”
“What about Dad?”
“He’s still Dad. He’s the best, but when it comes to Mom, he stays silent. I don’t know why she became so bitter towards me. I think it’s because I didn’t go to medical school and went into finance instead. She always gave me mixed signals about that too. Go to medical school. No, major in finance. You’re not cut out to be a doctor.” I sighed. “The only thing she wanted from me was to get married and have kids.”
“I’m sorry she treated you like that. I wish I had known. But let me tell you something. You’re smart enough to do anything you put your mind to. If you still want to go to medical school, go. Follow your heart, Ava. Don’t settle for less. And you look great. You’re beautiful inside and out.”
“But I really have put on weight and can’t seem to stay on a diet.”
“Then stop stressing about it and love yourself the way you are. Not everyone is supposed to be skinny.”
“But look at Caroline. She’s so tiny.”
“Have you ever seen her eat? Of course you haven’t, but that girl can outeat me on any day of the week. She was lucky enough to inherit some great genes.”
“Maybe you’re right.”
“No maybe about it. Listen to your big bro here.”
“Thanks, Justin. You’re the best, even after I treated you like shit.”
“And get over that, too. I have.”
“Okay.”
“So, do you feel better now?” Concern laced his tone.
“Yeah.”
“Then I’ll say it again. I am thrilled my baby sister is here.”
He gave me one of his loopy smiles and I wrapped my arms around him, hugging him.
“You ready to join the others?”
“You don’t think … I mean, will they think I’m weird because I took off like that?”
“Of course they’ll think you’re weird. Not because you took off, but because I’m your brother.” He winked at me.
“All righty, let’s go.”
We started the journey back and it really was a journey. “Damn, Justin, this is some kind of a house you’ve got here.”
“So I’ve been told,” he laughed. “We love everything about this place.”
“I’m sure. It would be difficult not to, but do you ever get lost?”
“Don’t laugh, but I did at first.”
“It took me forever to find that back door.”
We returned to where Caroline and that other guy were. They were sitting and talking, with some kind of baseball game on in the background. When we entered, the guy stood up and Caroline said, “Avery, I’d like you to meet my br—” but at that point, the hot guy interrupted and said, “Friend. We used to work together.”
The three of them glanced at each other and I was sort of lost in the shuffle. I jumped in and said, “Hi, I’m Avery.”
Caroline said, “Avery, that’s Pres?—”
And hot guy interrupted again and said, “Miles.”
“Nice to meet you Pres-Miles.”
He laughed and said, “No, it’s just Miles. Miles Patterson.”
I nodded and said, “Okay, Just Miles. You’ve got it.”
Boy oh boy, was Just Miles hot. Make that boiling. Scorching. Molten lava kind of hot. Messy dark brown, slightly wavy hair that was long enough to run my fingers through. And, my God, what a mouth he had. It made me want to jump on board and ride that train for life. His lips were the perfect kind of full, and every so often he’d slide his teeth over his lower lip, and I’d automatically squirm. His face was pure angular perfection ... high cheekbones with slight hollows beneath them that were the perfect shape to accommodate my lips. But those eyes. Golden brown, like coffee with lots of cream. I could only imagine what they looked like right when he was climaxing.
Fuck it all, Ava! Get your head out of the bedroom!
“Wouldn’t you agree, Ava?” Justin was asking me.
I shook my head and swallowed. “I’m sorry, what did you say?”
“We were talking about the weather here in the summer and I was saying how much more pleasant it is than in Charleston?”
“Oh, yes, it is.” Was my voice breathy sounding, or was it my imagination?
Just Miles was wearing jeans that rode low on his hips. They were tight and he had a superior set of buns. What would I pay to see those babies? And speaking of babies. I’d gladly have his any day of the week.
“Ava? What do you think?”
“Babies! I mean buns!” I blurted out.
“Excuse me?” Caroline asked.
Holy Toledo, did I just say all that out loud? “Fun! Anything sounds fun!”
“Ava, you look a little flushed. Are you sure you’re okay?” Caroline asked.
“Hot. I mean, I’m fine.” I looked across the room and my face totally flamed. Everyone was staring at me. I had unbuttoned my blouse and was fanning myself. I’d noticed that Just Miles had a gloriously hot tattoo of a sideways cross on his arm. I think I needed to go home.
“So. Avery, where are you staying?” Caroline asked.
“Oh, I’m at the Four Sleazy. Seasons! I mean the Four Seasons.” If I didn’t pull my act together, they would think I was on the crazy train. “I need to look for a place to live, but I was going to rent an apartment for a month until I can land something.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. You have to stay with us. My God, we have more room than we know what to do with. It would be crazy for you to rent a place. As a matter of fact, you should move in right away. Isn’t that right, Justin?”
“Absolutely. Do you need a car to drive? We have a couple of extra ones,” Justin said.
“Thank you for the offer, but I’m going to rent one. The company is paying for it until I do my final move.”
“If that doesn’t work out, you can always borrow one of ours.”
I was already going to be enough of a burden, so I declined their generous offer.
Then Justin made a suggestion. “Look, why don’t you let me take you back to the hotel. You can grab your things and check out. Then you can get settled in here.”
“Are you sure about this? I don’t want to impose.”
Justin bit his lip for a minute and then said, “Caroline, take her on a tour so she can see we have plenty of room.”
Then he turned to me and said, “Ava, this house is bigger than Mom and Dad’s.”
Caroline took me from room to room and Justin was right. I could live here for months, and they’d never know it. Their master bedroom suite was in a whole separate wing of the house, so I wouldn’t intrude on their privacy. I felt a ton better about staying here.
“This house is fabulous, Caroline.”
“Thanks. It was all Justin’s idea. He fell in love with it and had to convince me, but I’ve fallen in love with it too. At first, it was intimidating, but now I’m good. The thing is, the guest wing goes unused for the most part. We only use the other rooms. So, it gives it a cozier feel. Maybe someday if we have kids or something. Who knows?”
“Well, I love it.”
We returned to where the guys were, and Caroline showed me where everything was. “If you can’t find something, just ask or search around,” she said.
Before she could get any further, I pulled her to me and hugged her. “Thank you. Thank you for making me feel so welcome in your home. And thank you for loving my brother.”
“Oh, Avery, I’m so glad you’re here,” she said as she hugged me back.
Justin and I were getting ready to leave when he got a phone call. He checked the caller ID and said, “I have to take this. Hang on.” After several minutes, he hung up and said, “I’m sorry, Ava, but I have to go to the hospital. The surgeon on call has a major case of food poisoning. They had to admit him. I’m next on rotation. Sorry, guys.”
“Me too, honey. Hope they don’t kill you tonight.” Caroline kissed him.
Just Miles looked at me and asked, “Would you like me to take you to your hotel so you can get your things?”
No. What I really wanted was to drag my tongue all over his body but ...
“Oh, I don’t want to be a bother. I can do this another time.”
Caroline piped in, “Don’t be silly. Miles, that would be awesome. While you two are gone, I can get dinner started. Here are my keys. Take my car.”
We went out through the side door and into the gigantic garage which held six stalls. There were the customary Range Rovers. Justin had this thing about safety, and he thought those were the best. We got in and off we went. I think I must have been drooling because there was a wet spot in front of my blouse by the time we got to the street. Even Just Miles’ hands were sexy.
“So, is it Ava or Avery? I was getting conflicting messages back there.”
“Um, both actually. Avery is my given name. I was named after my grandmother, Avery. I was called Ava to avoid confusion. I prefer Avery, and now that I’m not living in Charleston, it’ll be an easy switch.”
“What’s so bad about Ava?”
“Oh, I don’t know. I always felt like it was an older woman’s name, not a little girl’s. All my friends would have an ‘ie’ on the end of their name. Like Lizzie, or Katie, or like my sister-in-law, Lexi. And there I’d be ... Ava.” I used a deep, dramatic voice when I said my name and he laughed. “It was always sort of grumpy sounding to me.”
“I see. And Avery represents what?”
“Well, if you ever met my grandmother, you’d get it. She’s a total sparkler, that one. And that’s exactly how I want to be.”
“Hmm. So how do you see yourself now?”
“Miles and miles from being a sparkler, I can tell you that.”
He gave me a quick glance, but his eyes went straight back to the road. I felt like he wanted to learn more about me but didn’t ask. He switched to my job, and he kept my brain occupied all the way to the hotel. I blabbered on and on the entire time. After I shut up, I thought to myself what a bore I had become. What kind of a person does that? Blathers on and on about themselves without regard for anyone else? I never asked him a single question about himself.
He came up to my room, and when we got there, I was immediately aware of him. His presence filled the space. Then I became acutely mortified because all my things were strewn everywhere. My underwear was scattered all over the floor, along with my pink-and-lavender polka-dotted nightie. All my intimate garments were on display for anyone to inspect. It was like I was having a show-and-tell. And so help me, there were my Spanx. Mother of God!
“Oh my God!” My hand flew to my mouth as I surveyed the room.
His eyes were absorbing everything, and I mean everything. And then, there it was in all its glory—my newest and greatest best friend in the world. My Magic Wand, out on display, with all its attachments right next to the flat screen, propped up no less, like they were on display, acting like a priceless Ming vase.
I gulped, not once, not twice, but three times.
And then, I thought I said it in my head, but apparently, I didn’t. “Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, what the hell am I gonna do now?”
“Well, Avery, I think the best thing you can do is pack everything up like we originally intended.”
Did Just Miles really say that? I whipped my head around and he stood there, staring at my toys with a smirk on his face.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” I clapped my hand over my mouth again. That was one word I had tried my best to stop using a couple of years ago. I guess it hadn’t worked too well.
Then I started chanting out loud, “Ohmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod, how could this have happened?”
The next thing I knew, strong hands were on my arms, and he was gently pushing me into a chair. “I think you need to sit down for a minute. It’s not the end of the world, Avery. Matter of fact, I think it’s kinda cute. Especially the attachments. Yeah, I really like the attachments. And the purple-and-pink polka-dotted nightie.”
“You like the attachments? And my polka-dotted nightie?” My voice ended up in a soprano-like squeal.
“Yeah. Now that we have that established, let’s get your stuff packed up, okay?”
“Okay, but do you really love my nightie because I just adore polka dots. They’re my favorite.”
“I like them too.”
“Do you wear them?”
“No, Avery, I don’t.”
”And you really love my toys?” Why couldn’t I let this go? What the hell was I thinking. Hell no he didn’t wear polka dots. Ugh.
“I really do, but let’s pack, okay?”
I nodded at him. Pretty sure he was kidding me, but he wasn’t cracking the tiniest hint of a smile. Maybe he liked girls with toys. Maybe I needed more toys. I could do more toys. I liked this one. I would be open to more. I smiled.
“That’s better,” he said as he patted my arm. An arm pat. What I really wanted was an ass pat. I was gonna have to work on that. My hand and his ass because I swear to God his was made to order.