Chapter 22
Elizabeth had had a restless night. The comfortable bed, the freshly ironed Egyptian cotton sheets, the soft eiderdown as well as her turmoil all contributed to keep her awake trying to guess his feelings and hers.
At dinner the previous night, he had been the epitome of gentlemanly behaviour. He had treated her relatives truly as guests of honour and engaged her uncle with interesting topics of conversation such as the war, England’s dependency on successful trade and the state of the monarchy.
But he also included Mrs Gardiner and Elizabeth in the conversation. He listened to their opinion and valued their input. It seemed they all had a pleasant time throughout the dinner hour, none of them ever feeling bored or neglected.
The following day as was her wont, Elizabeth woke early and took to the gardens.
But before long she was strolling far into the woods on well marked tracks.
After a steep climb she arrived at an incline that gave her a good view of the house below and the surrounding area.
To the west into the distance she could see what looked like a castle ruin.
But it was too far to go on foot and too dense a forest to go in a phaeton.
She was resolved to ask Mr Darcy about it and if possible borrow one of his horses to go and see it.
As she was musing about it she heard hoofbeats approaching from the same track she had climbed.
In a moment Mr Darcy appeared riding the most exquisite stallion Elizabeth had ever seen. He was as black as a moonless night and he seemed as tall as a horse could be.
But the rider took her breath away...
He was wearing a dark brown riding jacket that moulded onto his body showing the breath of his shoulders and the slenderness of his waist. Equally fitting were his breeches, but Elizabeth controlled her desire to feast her eyes below his waist and kept her gaze firmly locked on his.
“Miss Bennet good morning, I saw you climbing this hill and followed you knowing the vantage point is a significant one. How do you like it?” He asked her dismounting with a grace she did not believe possible.
“Good morning, Mr Darcy,” she said timidly, chastising herself for her less than maidenly thoughts about his figure. “The view from here is truly breathtaking.”
“Yes it is.” He said looking at her, but then he turned around and looked out also. “I never tire of it.” He said taking a sweep of his lands.
Elizabeth then pointed to the ruins in the distance. “Is that a castle ruin? And is it inside your boundary?”
“Yes it is. It is Mackworth Castle. A fourteenth century structure and as you can see from here the gate house is still mostly standing.
“Is it possible to visit it?”
“Yes, but you have to ride there on a sure-footed horse, for there is no open road and the track is difficult.”
“Alas I am no proficient rider. I can manage a horse on a good road at best and not at all on difficult terrain.”
“I can take you there.” He said quietly with a horse voice.
She turned around and looked at him confused, “what do you mean? I thought you just said there is no open road to it.”
“I did. I did not mean I could take you in a carriage, I meant you can ride with me... on my horse.”
Elizabeth laughed, “Do you jest, Mr Darcy?”
“Not at all Miss Bennet, it is the only way since you have just confessed you are not a proficient rider.”
She smiled, “I should have practiced more; I should have taken Lady Catherine’s advice when I had a chance.”
“You can still practice while you are at Pemberley, it would be my pleasure to help you sharpen your riding skills, but if you wish to see Mackworth Castle it seems to me you have only one option.” He smiled his most devastating dimpled smile at her and her resolve to resist him melted away like snow on cobblestones under the midday sun.
“Have we sufficient time now?”
Darcy took his watch out of his waistcoat pocket and checked the time. We may be a little late for breakfast, but if you do not mind and you are confident that your uncle and aunt will not be upset, I think we can do it.”
“The one we need to ask if he is not going to be upset is your horse. Will he be well with the extra weight on him?”
“That is what horses are for and this one is very strong.” He patted the stallion's neck lovingly and got a little horse kiss as a reward.
Elizabeth laughed, “What is this glorious creature’s name?” She asked also patting his mane.
“Sir Ebony.”
She looked amused, “How fitting. Who named him?”
“Me. However I was two and twenty at the time and with my head full of dreams.”
“Are you saying you no longer have dreams, Mr Darcy?”
He fixed a heated gaze on her, “oh I have dreams Miss Bennet, but they are less frivolous and perhaps more of an enduring nature.”
She blushed, “I see.”
“Do you?”
She looked away and scratched her head disconcertedly, “So are we going to see Macworth Castle or not?”
Immediately he offered her his cupped hand which she stepped into and up to the saddle. After she seated herself, he climbed behind her and adjusted her on his lap.
“Comfortable?” He asked pulling her impossibly close.
She fidgeted nervously. His warmth sipping through his clothes and heating her up more than the morning summer sun could ever do.
“Yes,” she said shyly.
He clicked his tongue and Sir Ebony moved slowly down the slope towards the west side of the hill.
After a few moments of uncomfortable silence, he asked, “how is Bingley getting on in Hertfordshire without my interference?”
She smiled trying to compose herself, as she could feel the warmth of his breath on the nape of her neck as he spoke, “As much as I would like to say that things are moving apace, I am afraid I cannot.”
“Do you mean to say his sisters have returned to Netherfield to torment him?”
She laughed, “Miss Bingley can certainly torment anybody within her reach, but no, Mr Bingley has been left well alone to make his own decisions, but he seems to be dragging his feet.”
“I must say I am surprised. Once I told him of my interference last autumn, I thought he was going to run me through and leave me for dead.” He chuckled. “I thought he would propose to Miss Bennet the first moment he had the opportunity.”
“Well, he has had more than one opportunity in the last three months but so far, nothing.”
“Very well, it looks to me that I will have to follow you to Hertfordshire and meddle into his affairs again, this time positively. Do you not think so?”
She turned towards him. His face was right there almost touching hers. She could have reached out and kissed him… all she lacked was the courage. His eyes had a shade of green in them that she had never noticed before. The hazelnut colour seemed to alter according to the light of the day.
She breathed in his scent... she felt like melting into the arms holding her around her waist to hold the reins... but she forced herself to focus on what he said,
“I wish for nothing less, Mr Darcy.” She whispered.
He held his breath as they gazed at each other until Sir Ebony whined and Darcy held the reins a bit firmer for the descent was steep.
What is it that she wishes, that I follow her or that I speak to Bingley on her sister’s behalf? I wish she would speak plainly… but then again I am also ambiguous, am I not?
Darcy decided instantly that he would speak very clearly with her... very soon.
“So tell me about Macworth Castle, Mr Darcy.” Elizabeth asked as they walked slowly among the ruins.
“Well not much is known about it unfortunately. As you can see the structure dates back from the fourteenth or fifteenth century. It was the home for several centuries of the Mackworth family; it was at some point reduced to the ruins we see now. Why? We do not know. But the gatehouse, which is the only building still partly standing suggests it may have been a grand old castle and strategically important in its heyday.”
They meandered through the ruins, while speculating about what might have happened there to uproot a family and leave their beloved home behind to crumble with the passing of time.
“But today it sits inside your lands. Do you know how that came about?”
“Pemberley and its boundaries as we see today have, for nearly three centuries, remained in the possession of my family. That it was first acquired by my ancestors is of no doubt; yet how Macworth Castle became part of it and by what means, or even from whose hands it was obtained, I cannot presume to say.”
Elizabeth nodded absentminded, “It makes me sad to see such a grand old structure left to ruins.”
“Well anything left unattended will eventually die and become ruins; castles as well as small houses, people and even relationships.” He mused.
“Yes as I have daily proof.”
Darcy frowned, “what do you mean?”
“Well I should not talk about it as it is very personal but... I trust you.” She looked to the distance to steady herself and then said quietly, “Jane and I have always maintained that only the deepest love would induce us into matrimony.” She looked at him and smiled sadly, “The reason for that is that we see every day what a marriage based on duty or comfort can do, not only to the couple but to all involved in it.”
Darcy said nothing and waited for her to elaborate. She seemed to be struggling with deep emotions for he realised this unburdening of whatever troubled her did not happen very often and he felt the privilege of listening to her.
“My father married my mother because he fell in love with her beauty. She was truly a lovely looking woman, which you can still see vestiges of to this day, even after her giving birth to five healthy children.”
“Yes I agree, Mrs Bennet is a very handsome woman.”
Elizabeth nodded and continued, “Unfortunately the love he felt for her was so shallow that it did not last beyond the first years of marriage. When he realised she was neither an intelligent nor witty woman, he became sarcastic and mean-spirited towards her, especially when they failed to produce an heir for the estate which, as you know, is entailed away from the female line.”
“It is hardly her fault.” Darcy said quietly.
“You are correct, but why is it that the burden to decide the sex of a child seems to sit squarely on the woman’s shoulders, when she has no more control over it than the man?”
He shrugged his shoulders, “Yes it must be very discouraging for any woman to see the disdain on her husband’s face when this happens. But in this instance with a well-educated man like your father, I expected better from him.” Darcy said with reproof in his voice.
“It must have been very difficult,” Elizabeth said, “for him when he realised all his dreams came to nothing. I cannot condemn him for that, but I can judge him on the treatment of his wife. We grew up watching him make fun of her, diminishing her even in the sight of her own children, while we, in our turn learned to despise her.”
Darcy walked beside her and watched her struggles. He felt like hugging her and consoling her as a tear escaped her beautiful eyes, but he had no right to do it... not yet.
“Had they truly loved each other with a deep and abiding love... well,” she sighed, “the marriage still exists but the relationship is gone. The affection that should hold them together through the tribulations of life is nonexistent. So he became a recluse; accustomed to hide inside his library seeking companionship with his books, and she became a nervous creature, seeking consolation in her daughters, trying to the best of her ability to provide a future for them by finding worthy marriages for each and all of them.”
Darcy again felt the shame of condemning Mrs Bennet for her actions in Hertfordshire. Had he been in her situation would he have behaved differently?
Confessing something so personal had cost Elizabeth a lot and as she unburdened herself tears fell from her beautiful eyes freely. Darcy’s heart squeezed in his chest as he struggled to find something meaningful to console her with, for he abhorred offering half-hearted nothings.
“I do not believe this will be your fate, Miss Bennet.”
She did not answer him.
He was so tempted to drop to one knee and confess undying love to this beautiful woman right there, who had the knack of taking his breath away every time he looked at her.
But he resisted it. She needed more time and he needed to woo her properly.
.. make her feel towards him as he felt towards her.
He smiled at her trying very hard to lighten her mood and fill her with confidence for the future, “I suspect when you do fall in love it will be once and for all, Miss Bennet, and I think the man in receipt of such love will indeed be the most fortunate among men.”
“You flatter me, Mr Darcy.” She exclaimed shyly.
“Not at all, I speak as I find.” They had stopped walking and carried on the conversation looking intently at each other.
Finally she looked around and said trying to disperse the gloomy she felt, “Breakfast!”
“Yes!” He said in agreement, “Shall we?” He turned to sir Ebony and whistled. The horse trotted towards him like a puppy and stopped near him. He then placed her back on the horse, getting behind her as he did on their way there.
Elizabeth rested her back on his chest and sighed.
He sensed she was a lot more comfortable than when they had set out to the castle.
He smiled to himself confident that she actually enjoyed the spontaneous outing, and felt more composed in his presence that he had ever noticed before.
His heart sang and rejoiced with this small victory.
He felt nothing would interfere with the development of their young love. ..
Darcy had no idea how wrong he would prove to be only a couple of days later.