Chapter 19
Liz
When I wake, it’s with a gasp.
Axel’s beside me, holding my hand. I want him to hold me, but I also want to run screaming.
“Jore and Veralden Radien,” I wheeze.
Axel moves closer and runs a hand over the top of my head. “Shh, you’re alright.”
I shake my head. “No, I mean, I’m fine, but it wasn’t a love story. Not at all.”
Axel frowns. “What?”
“I was there,” I say. “I was there. . .at the beginning, I think. I was Kiaga, and I was the first earth child she made.”
“You think that was you? You’re a rebirth of her very first creation?” He blinks. “You did shout Ama from underwater, when you summoned Jore, I assume, to help the water blessed.”
I shrug. “I really didn’t know what I was saying or doing, and I have no idea whether that was really me.
But either way, I got to see what the very first child Jore made remembered, and it was.
. .strange. As Kiaga, I loved only her. I wanted.
. .nothing. I was content. We were happy, but I think Ama—who, yes, I believe she was Jore by a different name—was terribly lonely.
And then a comet showed up.” I pull my hand away.
“And Axel.” My nostrils flare. The memories, they aren’t mine.
They aren’t fresh, but they feel both real and fresh to me in this moment.
It makes this hard. “Veralden Radien killed me, and he did it wearing your face.”
Axel’s mouth drops open.
“He was beautiful,” I say. “He shone, and he clearly had powers of light, fire, ice, darkness, electricity, all of it.” I shiver. “He was power and fury. There was no warmth or caring inside him at all.”
“He killed you?” Axel swallows. “So to you, it felt like I killed you?”
“Azar,” I say. “He wore your Azar face.”
“Weird,” Axel says. “Really weird.” He stands. “He really looked like me?”
I shake a little, hoping to shake off my lingering sense of unease. “I mean, the eyes were different, and he had like, an energy trail. It wasn’t exactly the same as you, but he was shaped like a dragon, and his head shape and whatnot, it was almost just like Azar’s.” I pause.
“What?” Axel asks. “Do I repulse you now because someone who looked like me killed you?”
I shake my head. “No, but I just remembered something.” I bite my lip, trying to remember the exact phrasing Freya used.
“Your mother said something to me in the volcano the last time I went in.” I frown.
“I didn’t understand it then, and I still don’t, but maybe it will help us make sense of the Veralden Radien thing.
She asked me why we used two names for you—Azar and Axel. ”
“Because I take two forms. I had to pretend to be two different creatures, and for all intents and purposes, I was.”
“I told her basically the same thing. I am Liz, but I’m also Gullveig. And Gullveig started as Gyda.”
He nods. “Okay.”
“Here’s where it got weird,” I say. “She said, ‘But my son’s not two people. He’s lived one life,’ or something like that. Then she said, ‘He’s one person with two faces.”
“Two faces?” Axel frowns. “What does that mean?”
I drop my hand on his arm. “Wait, she didn’t say two faces, she said two masks, and that feels relevant. Why would she say you had two masks?” I shake my head. “I mean, you had two completely different forms, and really.” I poke his shoulder. “If you include this one, you had three.”
He laughs. “But at that time, I just had the two. This one was gone, right?”
I nod. “Yeah, that’s right I guess.”
“Two masks.” He shrugs. “I don’t know what that means, or why I have both forms. I’ve never understood it.”
I sigh slowly. “I’m not sure why or how, but I feel like this is all connected somehow.”
“Do you think it’s part of some message from Jore?”
“I have no idea, though that would be nice. You’d think she could just, like, pop by and explain things, but for some reason no one ever does anything the easy way.”
“Speaking of things that don’t make sense.” Axel plops down on the bed next to me and takes my hand in his. “You can’t disappear like you did yesterday again. It was terrifying, and you almost died.”
“I’m a warrior,” I say. “I won’t sit things out, and it was a working strategy. I could see the vanir, even with the moon vanir blocking them, and I drew them out so you could see them too.”
“Hyperion did fine without you, flaming the air.”
I roll my eyes. “He wasted a lot of energy on nothing, you mean.”
“You could have stayed on my back and told me where they were.”
“That didn’t work as well. I could hardly see any of them, and they were easier to get when I drew them in.” I can’t help sulking a little. “It was a good plan, and it was working.”
“The vanir are powerful and plentiful.” Axel takes my hand and interlaces our fingers. “You can’t do that again. Promise me.”
I clamp my lips closed.
“Then I’ll leave you here in the future.”
“The water blessed won’t thank you for that,” I mutter.
He squeezes my hand hard—too hard.
“Ow.”
“Really? My hand hurts you?” His eyes are flashing. “You almost died, Liz. You—I can’t do that again. Are you even listening?”
I drop a hand on his jaw, liking the stubble. “I am listening. I will be smarter, I promise.”
“I may have three faces,” Axel whispers.
“I may look different in each, and I may even share a face with a lunatic who abandoned all of us and Jore.” He leans closer, until his face is an inch from mine.
“But Liz, every single one of my faces, every single one of my forms, and every part of my life loves you. Do not put me through that again.”
My heart lurches inside my body.
“I can only imagine that the idiotic version of Azar who let that tiny Gideon person kill him felt the same, so if I regain my memories, I’m sure I’ll only act worse.
” He drops his head against mine, so our foreheads are touching.
We’re so close together that I can barely see his gorgeous face.
“I promise that I will always be whatever you need. I will sacrifice whatever I must. Always.”
There’s a tiny knock at the door and Coral bursts through. “Is this a good time to tell you that Mom and Dad are leaving?”
“What about Gideon?” Axel asks.
“Him, too,” Coral says. “Hyperion can make a portal, but I thought you might want to, like, say bye or whatever.”
I reluctantly pull away from Axel, and I turn to face my sister. “Are you the chosen one who always has to interrupt us?”
Coral shrugs. “I thought I’d be waking you up. You’ve been sleeping for like forever. Dramatic much?”
Axel laughs. “She was stuck underwater, basically drowning and under torture for a significant time.”
“And then you burst from the water all broken and deranged and called on Jore again, and saved the day.” Coral purses her lips.
“I heard you were quite the hero. Believe me, no one will talk about anything else, and the water dragons are downright annoying with all their trumpeting, darting around, and whatnot. They also keep bringing piles of stinky fish, so if you could tell them ixnay on the ishfay, that would be great.”
I laugh, stand up, and stretch.
“I’m just saying.” Coral’s still shaking her head. “The earth blessed weren’t this annoying when they got wings, and they’d never had them before.” I swear, sometimes Coral acts like she’s forty years old.
“Sorry for sleeping too long while recovering,” I say. “If it helps, it wasn’t a very restful nap.”
“If I slept for seventeen hours, I wouldn’t call it a nap,” she mutters.
“If she’s this bad now, what are we going to do when she’s a teenager?” I ask.
Axel frowns as he follows me out. “Are ‘teenagers’ bad?”
Mom actually laughs as we walk into the entryway. “Notoriously bad.”
“Except for me,” I say. “I was a delight.”
“You broke a guy’s wrist,” Gideon says.
“He grabbed my butt,” I say.
“What about the car you rammed?” Dad asks. “Did it grab your backside?”
“No.” I scowl. “But the guy driving it grabbed my friend’s butt.”
“Why do these guys all grab things that aren’t theirs?” Axel asks.
“It’s a common human failing,” I say. “But it really shouldn’t be.”
“Speaking of grabbing things that aren’t yours, didn’t you forcibly bond my sister?” Coral asks.
“She’s going to be awful as a teenager,” I whisper. “Just awful.”
“I’m sad you’re going back,” Jade says from the corner.
Sammy’s behind her, looking at his feet.
Gordon and Rufus are behind them in human form. Gordon drops a hand on Sammy’s shoulder, and Rufus hands Jade a tissue.
“We have to go back,” Gideon says. “We can’t tell you how much we appreciate your efforts in Vancouver, and we know you sustained terrible losses. We hear there may be more blessed coming, and we need to head back to prepare to find more bondable humans.”
“So we’ll keep fighting for you,” I say.
Gideon shrugs. “We didn’t realize how much worse the vanir would be.”
I sigh.
Axel’s brow furrows. “I’m the recovery leader, though my brother Thunar—”
“Who I hear slayed more vanir than any other single dragon,” Gideon says.
“He’s quite a bad—uh. He’s a real baddie.
” He glances at the kids, clearly happy he kept control of his mouth.
I imagine being the Secretary of Defense hasn’t been very fun for him.
Gideon hates being in boardrooms and wearing suits.
“He’s not easy to control,” Axel says, “but my father?” He shakes his head.
“When he arrives with the rest of our people, I won’t be in charge anymore, not even tentatively.
In fact, I might be facing a bit of trouble.
There’s a good chance my father may not be pleased with how I’ve handled things. ”
Gideon blinks. “Oh.”
“As long as we’re able, we will continue to do all we can to help the humans—even the Americans who attacked us and killed me.” Axel scowls. “My father, however, is not understanding, and he’s not easy to persuade.”
Gideon nods. “Understood.”