Chapter 3 Paul #3
“Of course. I just need him to know I’m here.” Her eyes became glossy, but she stepped back and folded her arms. “Are you okay?”
“A solid ten.” I looked back at Chase, who had just spotted Nicole.
“Mama!” He reached for her, and I swallowed hard at her words and thought about how much this entire thing would have hurt Talya. She was his mother.
“Maybe let her by,” Cole muttered next to me. “He’s been through so much, and he trusts her.” My fingers curled into fists. “I don’t know what’s going through your head right now, Paul, but do this for your…” He didn’t need to say it; I heard him.
I rubbed my chest, which ached with a deep burn, and moved so she could sit on the edge of the gurney.
“Hey, sweetheart.” Nicole instantly went into mother mode as she gathered his hands and smiled down at him. “I know this is scary, but I’m here.” She leaned down and kissed his head, then placed a hand on his chest as it heaved. His sobs eased off a bit.
“Mama,” he cried, and I heard her sniff as well.
“Nicole,” she corrected him gently. “Mama is with the angels, way up there.” She pointed to the roof. “Maybe when we’re up in the clouds, you can feel her.” She patted his heart, and he put his arms up to her and tried to sit up.
Everything inside me coiled into a new pain, or maybe it was an old pain I had suppressed. I didn’t realize how hard I rubbed my thighs, but it was enough to have Keith look over.
“Deep breaths, friend.” Chili was suddenly beside me. “Lose it when we’re alone. Hold it together for now.”
His familiar tone instantly calmed me. We’d been through a lot together over the years, and it wasn’t the first time he’d given me the same warning. He’d been right back then, and I knew he was right this time. I needed to chill out and get myself together for my son’s sake, if not for my own.
“Can I?” Nicole looked at the doctor, who seemed pleased she had been able to stop his high-pitched cries.
He nodded, and she carefully scooped him up and pressed him against her chest. He instantly tucked his head under her chin.
His bottom lip was stuck way out, his eyes were wide, and his hiccups made him jump every few seconds, but the entire plane seemed relieved that he’d finally begun to calm down.
He looked so small and broken that it crushed my heart all over again.
“He’s young. These memories won’t stay with him.” Chili kept his head down as he scrolled through his phone. “She’s great with him.” I sat and tried for long, even breaths.
The pilot finally let us know we were about to taxi for takeoff, and everyone took a seat and buckled up.
It wasn’t lost on me that Nicole chose a spot a few rows back from where I was.
The doc arranged the little guy’s IV as she settled back with Chase in her arms. Mark handed her a blanket, and Frank slipped into the seat next to her with his tablet.
I knew he’d need to spend some time debriefing her, but he could have waited a beat.
Once in the air, I concentrated on my breathing to ease the pain.
In through the nose, out through the mouth.
Then I remembered my meds and swallowed a couple with a swig of water.
I moved my head and shoulders around a little, then closed my eyes and let my head go back home to Shadows as I permitted myself to drift off to a drugged sleep.
* * *
My brain fired back up instantly when I felt the plane touch down. Everything hit me at once, and I whipped around to look back at my son. He wasn’t in Nicole’s arms.
“Easy, brother.” John, who had taken Chili’s seat at some point, kicked his feet out with a yawn. “The meds the doctor gave him kicked in, and he’s out cold. He’s with the nurse in the back. The doc needed to check out Nicole.”
“Nicole?”
“Yeah, she’s got a nasty cut on her head, and her cheek started to swell, probably from the altitude and such.
” I glanced back at her again. I saw she fought sleep as her head bounced up and down.
She had a bandage high on her forehead, and her face looked red and sore.
“Mark had her studying our family photos,” John went on.
“Wants to help her feel more comfortable when she gets to the house.” Mark was good at making people feel at ease, it was something I admired about him.
“She’s exhausted,” John’s lips pressed together, “but worried Chase might wake up before she does. They seem to have grown close.”
“Yes, I bet they have.” I heard how I sounded but didn’t care.
The last few days had been a nightmare. I leaned back and closed my eyes as I remembered the video she had broadcast to the world about how my son was a pawn in a game of power with the Cartel.
That was forever out there, he’d never escape his past because of her.
How could she be so reckless and all for a fucking story.
“Hey,” John hit my arm, “come on. We’ve landed at the hospital, and they’re already getting off.”
I shook the cobwebs away and looked out the window. Chase’s stretcher was being wheeled toward an ambulance that would take him to the North Dakota hospital.
“Mia is waiting at emergency with Savi and Dad,” Cole said over his shoulder as we climbed down the steps. “They’ll take the boy to x-ray first, then he’ll get bloodwork. Meanwhile, the rest of us get checked over one last time before we head to Shadows.”
“I’m fine,” I grunted as a knee-jerk reaction.
Cole turned and threw a look at me. “Well, it’s not your call or mine, so suck it up, princess,” he growled.
I knew I needed to get back in line. “Copy that.” I headed for the SUV and caught Nicole’s zombie-like expression as I took the seat in front of her. Even looking like death, she was friggin’ beautiful, and I hated it.
It was a short drive from the tarmac to the hospital, not far enough.
I hated that place and shuddered at the memories.
I’d gone from living my best life to being dead in that hospital.
Then I had to leave my family behind and live a whole different life in Mexico, which had only brought me pain and heartbreak.
Now, a decade later, I was right back in the thick of that shit again.
As always, we used our private entrance to the hospital, which was reserved for our special ops teams, thanks to Frank and Daniel.
Those two made sure everything worked like a well-oiled machine.
Mia waited by the door and threw herself into Mark’s arms as he hurried to see her.
He lifted her and kissed her hard, then put her back down.
“I’ll let you know what’s happening as soon as I can.” She was instantly all business. Mia didn’t work at the hospital anymore, but Daniel made sure that whenever anyone from our teams arrived with an injury, Mia was in charge. The perks of the military and lots of gracious funding.
“Mia,” I called as she headed down the hall. She turned and nodded to show she knew how important it was that Chase wasn’t to be left alone.
“Copy that,” she confirmed, then looked over my shoulder at Nicole and gave her a warm smile before she hurried away.
Savannah hugged Cole and whispered something in his ear, I caught part of it.
She asked if Nicole knew that Chase was my son; he said no.
Everyone knew not to say a word. That was what was great about our house; secrets were never spilled.
Ever. At least until they weren’t a secret, and this time it would be for me to tell.
“You must be Nicole.” Savannah smiled and slipped right into hostess mode. “I’m Savannah, Cole’s wife. It’s lovely to meet you.”
“Nice to meet you.” Nicole shook her hand, then looked embarrassed as she brushed at a stain on her shoulder that was probably left there from Chase. “Sorry we’re meeting under such circumstances.”
“You look a hell of a lot better than I did when I first met them all.” She chuckled. Savi was always great at putting people at ease, just like Mark. “Would you like to grab something to eat while the guys get checked out?”
“I’d love to, but first I need to find out what the hell is wrong with this guy before I can think about eating.” She head-pointed at me.
Savi grinned, and I could tell she was in love with Nicole already. “Now you’re speaking my language. I’ll be over there when you’re ready.”
John tried to hide his laugh as the guys scattered to leave me alone. Assholes. Daniel began to walk toward us, but Cole turned him away mid-stride.
“Thanks, Savi.” Nicole turned and crossed her arms as she looked up at me. “So, you’re pissed at me?”
“Pissed doesn’t begin to describe it.”
Her brows pinched as confusion raced across her face. “All right, why?”
“Seriously?” How could she not know?
“Seriously,” she shot back.
I rubbed my face and leaned against the wall behind me. “You used us.”
“I’m sorry, what?”
“Was everything that happened just a part of your plan?”
She shook her head. “Paul, you need to let me in on the conversation inside your head. You’re only giving me bits and pieces.”
I pushed off the wall and towered over her. “You used that kid for a fucking story!” I boomed and saw Frank look over.
Her chin pulled in, and her eyes widened. “What?”
“Don’t act dumb, Nicole. It’s an ugly look on you.
” So much of the frustration I had held down tight to that point raced to the surface.
I let loose like an angry bull finally getting a chance to take a run at its rider.
“All the signs were there. You always had your camera, filming everything!” I flicked my hand at her.
“The first chance you got, you stuck the kid in front of a camera and told the world what happened. I’m sure a raise is coming your way, and I hope it was worth it. ”
Whack! She slapped me hard across the face as tears spilled down her cheeks.
“How could you say such a thing?” she hissed.
“I was surrounded by Cartel, with no way out, and you,” she jabbed a finger right into my sore shoulder, but the pain didn’t register because of how amped up I was, “told me to use whatever means necessary.” She swiped at her eyes with her sleeve as more tears fell.
“I was following your orders. I did my job. I brought that sweet boy back to safety. You have no idea what I went through to do that.”
“Okay, you two,” Frank stepped up with his hands raised, “let’s take a beat.”
“So, you had no other choice but to turn on the camera?” I ignored Frank. “I find that very hard to believe, considering the connections you have. Maybe you should have called your mystery guy. You know, the one who calls out of the blue.”
“What is your problem, Paul?” She ignored my dig. “Why are you so upset? The boy is safe.”
I wanted to scream because he’s my son, but I couldn’t. “It was my extraction! I had orders to get the boy back home.”
“Mission accomplished! He’s here, so what the hell?” Her cheeks flamed with anger.
I went to open my mouth, but Frank held up a hand.
“Enough, Paul,” he warned, “before you say something you can’t take back.”
“Oh, trust me,” Nicole laughed as she angrily brushed her tears away, “he’s way past that.”
“Am I? Or does the truth hurt?” I knew I was a being the biggest asshole in the world, but my world felt like it was slipping out from beneath me, and she just aired it all on the news.
“Take a walk, Paul,” Frank ordered, and I stepped back, but I wasn’t leaving. “Nicole—”
“You know what, Frank?” she said. “I appreciate the ride from Chili, but I’m done. They’re not my unit, and this isn’t my home. I need to get back to Mexico so I can do my job.”
She was crazy.
“I can’t let you do that.”
She raised her chin. “Yes, you can.”
“You have orders to come to Shadows with us.”
She let out a dark laugh. “I never got that order.”
Frank held up his phone and showed her something, and her face fell. “You didn’t, but I did.”
Nicole tipped her head back and took a deep breath. “I need some air.” She headed toward the door, but not before she shot me a nasty glare.
“Hey,” Frank pulled my attention back to him, “not the time, nor the place, to be having this conversation.”
He was right. It wasn’t, but I didn’t care. “What did you show her?”
Frank looked at the ground and shook his head. “Paul, there’s a lot more going on here. Right now, we just need to get back to Shadows before anyone gets word we’re here with the child. Copy?”
I locked my jaw, pissed he wouldn’t share. “Copy.”
“Frank,” Mia was behind him, and my stomach twisted, “the little guy is ready to be loaded on the chopper the—”
“What’s wrong with him?” I interrupted, growing more impatient with every second.
Frank placed a hand on his daughter’s shoulder. “Has the doctor said anything?”
“Yes,” she looked back at me like the professional she was, “he has bacterial pneumonia. I won’t lie, it’s a pretty bad case, and given the little we know about his life, he might not have gotten all his vaccines.
” She paused when she saw my face. “It’s okay.
The doctor thinks we got to him in time. ”
“Thank God,” I huffed with relief.
“We gave him a good shot of medication, and he’ll be on it for the next few weeks.
Once we get back to Shadows, I’ll check in on him frequently and monitor him from there.
He needs lots of rest and fluids, but most importantly, he needs to be in a stable environment.
The less stressed he is, the better.” She eyed me when she said it and stepped forward.
I knew I was about to get a tongue-lashing from her.
“That means whatever the hell you have going on with Nicole better get wrapped up soon because that little boy needs her to get through this, and after that he’s going to need you.
So, hash your shit out and move on. You copy me? ”
Frank smirked while I fought not to roll my eyes. I knew better than to push Mia. She always gave it to me straight, no matter what. All the wives were the same. “Copy.”
She looked at her dad. “I’ll spread the word we got the green light to ship out.”
“Good.” He glanced at me, but I didn’t wait to hear what he had to say. I headed for the SUV. I needed to get home.