17. Ember
Ember
S itting in my office, I stared at my computer and willed it to behave.
It had been an amazing week. Alejandro spent the night, even though he offered to give us space. But I usually came home around five or six; West usually made it around six, and Alejandro around seven or eight. So I still had time with just West.
I’d asked my omega a couple of times how he was doing, and he replied the same way each time. The sex was mind-blowing, and he didn’t mind Alejandro hanging around.
Which was West speak for he wanted the alpha around as much as I did. Alejandro was easy to get along with, and most of the time we snuggled on the couch and watched movies.
Maybe, a tiny voice in my brain whispered. Maybe we could keep him.
I squashed the voice. It was too soon to tell.
West and I dated an alpha named Josh three years ago, and it had started out great.
He was charming, fun-loving, and not pushy.
Didn’t seem to care at first that West didn’t want to be knotted, that I could go top or bottom, or that we were both passionate about our jobs.
It wasn’t until a few months later that Josh’s suggestions got louder about us staying home so he could take care of us. Josh assumed West would beg for a knot during our heat, or that I’d want to quit my job and be the good little omega homemaker.
I’d thought Josh would work out too. I really liked Alejandro, but it would be safer for me to keep my expectations on the ground, firmly level, where they belonged.
The feeling of being on a limb stayed with me, but I wondered if maybe the branch was a little stronger than I’d realized.
My brother Terran poked his head into my office. “Got a minute?”
“Sure.” I gestured at my armchair. I’d spent more time on the couch than at my desk. It was more comfortable than my chair. It had nothing to do with the couch still smelling faintly of Ben and Rian.
Nope. I was already on a limb. I wasn’t about to leap off without a parachute.
Terran took a seat. He wore shorts despite the chilly weather, and a thin long-sleeved shirt. He had dirt smudged on his cheek, so he was probably wandering around doing yardwork. No wonder he looked so happy.
I gestured at the plate of food in front of me. “Hungry?”
Alejandro was not playing around with food now that West and I gave him free rein, so he prepped breakfast, lunch, dinner, and some desserts.
I’d had an actual breakfast every day, not just a cup of coffee, and this week we had chicken salad with a strawberry vinaigrette for lunch.
“The software is still having issues.” Terran stole some fruit and cheese from the charcuterie board Alejandro made me for snacks. He called it my good girl charcuterie board since I liked snacks more than meals.
My stomach tightened. This was why I didn’t like heavy meals. I hardly ever had panic attacks anymore, but they used to happen several times a week. Tension made my stomach upset and it was hard to eat.
“I don’t know what’s happening.” I took a long sip of my Coke, willing the sugar to make everything better. “I’ve started checking it daily, and sometimes it’s fine and sometimes there’s all sorts of bugs.”
“Me too.” Terran sighed and ran his hand through his sandy blonde hair. It was getting a little shaggy around his ears, and he’d cut it soon.
He was muscular from his handyman work around the property as well as the weights he liked to lift. My brother was a beefcake cinnamon roll who got hit on as much as I did when we went out.
Terran was partially why I didn’t buy Greg’s whining that the reason no one wanted to date him was that he was a beta.
Sure, plenty of alpha and omega assholes thought they couldn’t get by with only betas, but it was also about personality and how you took care of people.
Like Alejandro. West and I wouldn’t have kept him around if he acted for one second like we owed him our bodies just because he had a knot.
I shut my brain down, not wanting to think about knotting in front of my brother.
“We might have to pause some functions for maintenance,” Terran said, looking grim.
I groaned. “What if people are chatting? In the process of signing up?”
“We can section it off, do updates at different times of day.” Terran added some candied pecans to his pile of food. “This is good. I’m glad you’re finally eating.”
I almost said the food was from the alpha West and I were toying with, but that didn’t feel right. We weren’t toying with Alejandro, not like I usually meant. It wasn’t just epic sex and then see you later, thanks for all the knots. “Dating a chef has it perks.”
“You too?” Terran raised his eyebrow. “Geez, I guess I should head down to Talk of the Town, see if my bondmate’s been there the entire time.”
“I didn’t say bondmate,” I corrected quickly. “Cart before the horse.”
“Sunshine bonded Logan,” Terran pointed out. “And now you’re dating that chef who’s been flirting with you for months.”
“He wasn’t flirting. He was…” I trailed off at the incredulous look on Terran’s face. “Okay, fine, he was flirting and it paid off.” I waved my hand. “Anyway, back to work. Site maintenance shouldn’t be too horrible. And I don’t see another choice short of taking the website down.”
I shuddered at the thought. Years ago, we could have effectively hit pause on the website and rebuilt the code we needed.
But that was years and many, many profiles ago.
The Cosmic Bonds website was massive on the back end.
We had thousands of lines of code for the matching software, for the chatting app, for the New Age information section.
“I’ll ask West to help,” I said, knowing he’d say yes. He was already helping me scan the code; what was one more project? Besides, us coding together usually led to naked times, so it was almost a Pavlovian response at this point.
“Let me know how you want to set it up.” Terran stood up, stealing some more grapes.
I pushed the tray at him. “You can take more. I have, like, ten other snacks packed in my lunch box.”
Terran laughed. “Of course you do. I’m meeting Abby later for lunch and don’t want to ruin my appetite.”
“Sure you are.” I winked. “And how is Abby?”
Abby was Terran’s beta friend. She was in art school, and they’d been friends for years.
The rest of us had a betting pool on when they would finally stop pretending they didn’t want to jump each other’s bones.
I had August of this year, figuring Terran would catch wind of our cousins getting all packed up and want that for himself.
“Abby’s fine,” Terran said, sounding annoyed. “I’ll see you later.”
“Byyyyyyeeee.” I drew the word out until he left and then scowled at my laptop.
Just as I got focused on the lines of code again, Stella opened my door with a smirk. She looked entirely too pleased with herself. “Hi, cuz. How are you? Busy?”
Immediately suspicious, I gestured at the laptop. “Just trying to fix the software issues before we have to nuke it back to the Stone Age. Why?”
“Great, because you have a visitor.” She gave me an innocent look, but my cousin didn’t have an innocent bone in her body. She was half the reason I got into trouble as a teenager.
“Who?” My heart flipped and I couldn’t figure out who I was hoping popped in to see me. West? Stella wouldn’t look so smug. West was a done deal. I licked him, and he was mine, forever. Alejandro maybe?
“That client from before? Ben?” Stella tucked some brown hair behind her ear, casually, like she wasn’t wrecking my entire peace of mind. “Just dropped by to see you.”
My heart did a stupid little pitter-patter. “Maybe there’s issues with their profiles.”
He wasn’t here to see me. He was a client, and that was why he’d stopped by. Rian would scowl at me for the software fuckup and I couldn’t even blame the grumpy omega.
I would probably have to admit the software was being stupid lately and that was why it was trying to match him with a duck. How did a duck get into the profiles? I didn’t know; sometimes code had a mind of its own.
“I’ll bring him by.” Stella left before I could tell her I was perfectly capable of going to the waiting room myself, and I realized I was sitting where Ben sat last time.
I scooted over but then stood up. I should go sit in my desk chair. He couldn’t know I was sitting on the couch because of his scent, right? Right. He didn’t know I hardly ever sat on the couch.
But my laptop, drink, paperwork, and array of snacks were all laid out on the coffee table. I didn’t have enough time to move all of it before he got here. I decided to sit down again, and my inner omega was pleased, thinking, Good, let him refresh his scent on the couch . It had been too long.
I rolled my eyes at myself. My omega was a brazen hussy, who was apparently not satisfied with getting regularly railed by an alpha and omega.
From the hall, Ben said, “Got it from here, thanks.” And then he appeared in the doorway.
I stood up again. “Did your profile try to match you with a duck?”
“A duck? No, should it?” He paused, looking yummy in a faded Vann Jeger band T-shirt and faded blue jeans.
“Not at all. Do you want to sit?” I pointed to the couch, before remembering it was a useless gesture. “Would you like to sit down?”
“Sure.” He walked over to the couch, barely using his cane. He had a good memory to know where everything was from before. I could barely remember what I ate yesterday, but he moved around the coffee table like he’d been here more than once.
He sat down with a gust of scent, and I took a deep breath in. Spicy woods and deep berry. A cranberry? I didn’t know. I’d have to ask Alejandro about berry scents. I leaned forward, the urge to rub my chin all over his shoulder nearly unbearable.
Having amazing sex all week didn’t take the edge off the desire for this alpha.
It made it worse.
My omega instincts wanted to know why we weren’t getting with the program. The sexy, knotty program.
“Did your other date go okay?” I looked around like Rian was hiding behind the trash can. “Rian’s not here?”
“I was up here on business and…” He frowned, leaned forward, and growled.
It was a possessive growl and made all the hairs on my arm stand up. I barely suppressed a whimper, slick heat soaking my core.
“Who’s that?” He reached over, his hand landing on my forearm. He lifted my arm and scented me. “He’s new.”
“Alejandro,” I said, my voice breathy. “The alpha West and I are dating.”
He let go and cleared his throat. “Sorry. That was rude.”
It wasn’t rude; it was hot. I swallowed hard. “It’s okay. Surprising. He’d been flirting for months, and, uhhh…”
“Good,” he grumbled. “Better treat you two right or I’ll kick his ass.”
“Noted,” I said, and shifted my weight. I pressed my knees together, sure if I opened my legs too much my perfume would smoke out the room.
He smelled so good, the spicy woodsy scent heady. “The date with Daisy went okay?”
“Daisy? Who’s—oh, yeah.” He shrugged. “It was fine.”
“You need another match?” I almost didn’t want to offer. The thought of them dating yet another woman made me want to snarl.
“Not right now. Rian’s still looking through profiles.”
“Okay.”
“I had a business meeting up here. I wanted to stop by and see you. If you’re not busy.”
“It can wait,” I said quickly. “Are you hungry?” I gestured at the food on the coffee table. Food he couldn’t see, I was an idiot.
“Are you asking me to lunch?” He grinned, his blue eyes twinkling.
“Yes,” I said before I could think about if it was a good idea. “I mean, I have some snacks here. But if you’re in the area—wait, how are you getting back to San Francisco?”
He laughed. “A car service, unless you want to drive me?”
I suddenly wanted nothing more than to do just that. I considered my schedule. I didn’t have intakes today since I was working on the buggy software. But I could take a few hours to get lunch with Ben. The chance to do this wouldn’t come again.
He was a client. I was just being nice. Cosmic Bonds liked to go the extra mile for their clients.
“I’ll drive you,” I replied. “What do you want for lunch?”
“Lady picks. I’ll pick up the tab.” His joy was almost tangible, and his scent got a little bit lighter, like a wind was blowing in my imaginary dark woods.
The real challenge was going to be having lunch with him without getting him to knot me in the back seat of my car. Or not having dirty thoughts. I didn’t want to perfume all afternoon, not when Rian was a big question mark.
It was going to be a long drive back to San Francisco.